TTC after MC - May 2021 thread 19

[bez91]

Here we are again... thread 19. Not sure if any of you ladies are here from thread 1. I think I've been around since about thread 5.

@SLCxxx
@justwant2beamum
@Canadadarling
@Marvellouslymadmum
@SamBass
@bubblybrit
@elsimo
@Loulou237
@Fingerscrossedfor2021HK
@susiebluebell
@Mamat90
@Lollipop25
@TheDaydreamBelievers

Tagged everyone I can find/think of.

A very new tag list from the last one I did in February, a lot of ladies got BFPs 🤰 Hopefully some good news for us in the coming months... 🤞🏼

Any recaps on journey so far welcome...

@Elsie2021, I am so sorry about your MMC. That must have been so stressful to discover at your 12 week scan!

I am TTC#1. 1 MMC last summer at 8 weeks, another loss at 23 weeks this winter. Tests showed I had a blood clotting issue. Currently pregnant (6+3), but some indications it is not progressing properly. So mentally preparing for a third loss (having another scan on Thursday).

@bez91. Yeah I’ll test on Saturday if AF hasn’t arrived before then. I’m aiming for a more relaxed approach this month! Oh I’ll keep my fingers crossed for you when you do text. If it’s a BFN then I’d be tempted to buy the litre bottle of gin and enjoy your party!

OK @bubblybrit so I caved earlier and used an OPK which came up positive..was planning on waiting another few days bit I couldn't..... over the moon 💕 cautiously optimistic too lol

Brilliant news @Twinkles18. I’m so happy for you! Congratulations!!

Hi @Elsie2021 and welcome! So sorry for what you've been through, but you're in good company!

Recap from me, I'm 30, partner is 36, we started 'not trying, but not preventing' Nov 2019, fell pregnant August 2020 but miscarried very early - my first pregnancy After that, we tried and tried but nothing happened, and my cycles were MAD all over the place. I recently found out I've got PCOS which explains that bit, and am now doing lifestyle changes to reset my hormonal balance and improve fertility.

Wish you all the best with your journey!

@Twinkles18 Woohoo! xx

Thanks girls 🥰 @bubblybrit @susiebluebell

@Twinkles18, such nice news to wake up to! Hope all goes well, Twinkles!

@Twinkles18 such amazing news! Congratulations 🎉

@bez91 we got pregnant our first month of trying first time so we’re very lucky! But obviously wasn’t meant to be. 14 months is such a long time. I hope you are doing okay and get your rainbow soon! 🌈

@davidrosejumper 23 weeks 😔 I just cannot even imagine. Fingers crossed for this pregnancy, I hope everything works out okay.

@susiebluebell I’m sorry for your difficult time but at least now you have a diagnosis and a plan!

@Twinkles18 congratulations hun 🎉

Congrats @Twinkles18 💗

Sorry I haven’t kept up much with the thread. It’s my due date on Thursday and I’m no closer along to a new pregnancy!

Does anyone else worry they won’t conceive again? I’ve got caught straight away twice in the past - which I know is lucky considering how lorn some have to try but this time around I felt lured into a false sense of security and now it’s not happening I can’t help but think there is something wrong! 😩 any words of advice?

I don’t do opks because they are just difficult with work etc and I drink so much water they barely work. On my successful cycle last October I used it. I nearly bought it this month because I had my Covid vaccine and it threw my ovulation off but I didn’t 😩 and I missed my whole fertile window.

Sorry for the rant. I’m just struggling with the due date approaching!

Sorry so many typos. * long

• last cycle used clear blue digital tests to get the solid smiley for my peak.

I feel your pain @Loz2467 I am trying for my 3rd so was probably bordering on cocky at the start thinking i could have a baby whenever the hell i wanted. Here we are 18months, a mc and chemical later!!

My appointment with a fertility doctor has been cancelled twice and having my 3rd blood test in a week (to check thyroid levels) cos my doctors don't know what they're doing.

So yeah, feel like the universe is trying to tell me something Not very helpful i know but you are definately not alone x

@Beleeve I’m so sorry to hear about your MC and chemical. Totally get the thinking we can just get pregnant! I was so upset after the loss. Heartbroken and just devastated 💔 I was 17 weeks so I thought I was “safe” but Covid had other plans!

I got through a couple of months of grief and I was like let’s do this… I want a sibling for my boy! Thought I’d get pregnant that month… nope! Months and months down the line now!

Totally get you about the doctors - my FSH and LH was low for “mid cycle” but the doctors classed it as normal - it was 2 days before my ovulation so I know it wasn’t normal but then I’m ovulating - I get the twinges and the rise in BBT? So maybe I have a quick surge? My consultant agreed to do day 3 bloods and day 21 but my letters haven’t even come through yet and that was discussed 3.5 weeks ago! How frustrating that everything is just so behind! Are you doing yours this cycle?

It’s just good to have people to talk to when this is so isolating and consuming! Thank you!

Gosh 17 weeks, i cannot imagine what that must have been like for you @Loz2467 We're kind of made to think if everything is ok at the 12 week scan then we're good! Must have taken a lot of strength to get through that time.

I am due to ovulate end of this week (i think, last 2 cycle were the mc and chemical so hard to know for sure) so i guess i just try again. I know my folic levels are ok, thryroid they forgot to check so need another blood test tomorrow and progestorone they said they can't prescribe me anyway 🙄 So can't do much else other than try again and see what happens.

In my gut i feel like i'm going to go back to not being able to fall pregnant again but i'll keep trying. I use the cheapie ovulation strips until i get to around the time i'm expecting to ovulate and then use the digital ones, they seem to be pretty spot on for me.

The early pregnancy unit said to me before you can't compare one pregnancy to another which i get but think it's natural to wonder why we were able to get pregnant before and now all of a sudden can't. Something has obviously changed.

I can imagine your due date must be so painful for you. My brain can't even go there to imagine what you must be feeling. Just keep talking about it, do something nice to remember your baby. I only had an early mc but i've got a box with my kids old babygrows etc in so put the pregnancy tests in there just as a way of not forgetting i guess. Do whatever feels right for you. Here to talk anytime x

Totally understand the fear that you may never get pregnant again. I still get that fear coming and going, thinking that falling pregnant last year was a fluke! Rationally, I know that I've got plenty of time (I'm 30) and my health is generally really good and I'm improving my PCOS, but it can feel absolutely pointless sometimes.

Big hugs to all! And due dates can fuck right off! Mine was in April xx

@Beleeve fingers crossed for your O at the end of this week! Sending you lots of baby dust!

Sorry to hear about your chemical and MC the last two cycles. That must of been so hard for you! It’s such a tough journey this isn’t it 😩

I’m just paranoid after getting pregnant quickly 9 months ago and then with my son I’m like well why can’t it happen quickly again and start diagnosing myself with stuff. It’s so hard! And deep down people don’t know long term effects of Covid. Especially on males. It makes me question everything. TTC after loss is always hard without other things thrown in! Xxx

Thanks @susiebluebell that’s great that you have found a way to manage your PCOS I think I saw something on the thread about your diet etc. Fingers crossed for you!

Yeah… I’m just questioning everything! I mean we aren’t really at the stage where we would get checked yet… it’s the fear of it. I’d love to get checked and someone say yeah nothing wrong with either of you keep going! But then if we did get checked and something wrong with one of us of panic even though I know they are there to help? If that makes sense? Xxx

@Loz2467 I don't know if i've asked you this already but was the loss definately due to covid? I had no idea there was a link, that's frightening.

@Beleeve yeah 100% 🥺 I knew deep down! I got Covid when I was 12/13 weeks pregnant and the baby stopped growing at 14.5 weeks - was a MMC so I only found out when I went for a gender scan with my partner 🥺 I walked in with a Starbucks and expected to walk out with a pink confetti cannon but no I was taken to my local hospital so confirm and then plan and induction to birth her.

We got the post-mortem back 3 weeks ago and Covid infected my placenta and stopped it from working. I wish I was brave enough to continue to share my story but it’s 5.5 months ago now. Covid in January was rife and such a bad variant.

I’m just so upset I haven’t got pregnant since: it just adds to the grief like everyone else. My partner won’t get checked and isn’t Kean on vitamins. Xxx

@Loz2467 so sorry for all you've been through. It can take some time to conceive after MC I've found, had my MMC in December. Did conceive last month but another MC. You will get there.
Reading of your partner made me a bit angry, after all you've been through he could at least show some willing and pop a few vitamins and get checked it that puts your mind at more ease.

Couple of days past ovulation here I think. Trying not to test until AF due, landed a new job this week (internal) so in some ways it wouldn't be great timing to conceive this month with working a 3 month notice 😆 nothing happens as you want so maybe a good omen

@bez91 thank you for being so reassuring. I just think it adds to the grief each month you don’t conceive and I just think why has it happened easily twice before and then not now - honestly makes me think there should could be something wrong with one of us. I read somewhere about someone having inflammation - but surely I’d have pains.

I know - he seems to be in denial that there could be any problems as we’ve got pregnant twice before but a lot has changed. MMC, both had Covid, both getting older. I think the next step might be if I’m not pregnant by jan 2022 I’ll get a full run of tests done on us both - I think it’s £450 for both. Then I can decide if we want to get some help or throw the towel in.

I’m so sorry about your losses and one so recent too. That must be difficult! Sending hugs and sending lots of baby dust for your TWW!

Christ @Loz2467 that is awful!! I totally get what you mean about the gender scan and believeing everything will be ok. You go into the 20wk scan thinking about whether it's a boy or a girl and then when they start checking all the vital organs it's a reminder that you're not out of the woods yet.

If you felt strong enough i do think sharing your story would be so helpful for people, i honestly had no idea there was a link and i bet it would be hard to find solid evidence anywhere.

Have you been referred to a specialist? Thankfully i asked my doctor to refer me last yeat when it got to 12months of trying. Thank god i did cos i am still waiting on that first appointment and things have obviously changed since then as i've had the mc and chemical. Get yourself on the list as soon as you can!! You never know it may even take some of the weight off knowing you're heading in the right direction x

Hi all

Can I join in? I’m very late to the chat and I’ve no clue which chat is best for me on here. You all seem to be going through something similar so hopefully this is a good fit. I’ll explain…

I’m 39, partner 42. We were under the impression we could never get pregnant due to male infertility. However, much to our surprise we found out we were pregnant in May. After the shock we embraced it and were so excited. But to believe it properly we wanted to see it, so we went for an early reassurance scan. We were told we either had our dates mixed up or it was not a viable pregnancy and would have to wait two weeks for another scan to confirm. Those two weeks were awful, I still had symptoms but knew it wasn’t going to be good news. I ended up having my next scan at EPU where they told us that despite a lot of growth there was no heart beat and it would be a ailed pregnancy. We lost it two days later.

We are now just over a month since we lost it and have decided that if it happened once it might happen again. So we’ve got our vitamins in order, healthy diet and I’m exercising to shift some weight. We’ve provisionally put a time scale on it as we don’t want it to consume us, we loved our life before so we can go back that but we don’t want any regrets. We don’t want to wonder ‘what if we tried’.

Are we being foolish in hoping it might happen or should we accept the original prognosis from his doctors 20 years ago?

Also, any tips appreciated? 😄

@ChangeHtotheP, sorry for your loss. No advise from my side, except that I really enjoyed reading 'It Starts with the Egg', and follow a lot of their advise.

I had my scan today after the inconclusive one last week, and it showed a blighted ovum. Don't know how long it will take my body to clue into that fact.

@davidrosejumper So sorry you’re going through this. I was so ignorant to how hard it is for some people with what seems like the most natural thing in the world before all of this. It’s such a roller coaster of emotions.

I hope you’re ok. I know the frustration of your body taking a while to catch up. I decided to look at it as my body was doing everything it could to make it work, it couldn’t have tried harder.