TTC 35+ Thread 6 Cougar and Silver Fox Club

[M4v3r1ck]

Hey ladies, setting up a new thread! 😃 Hope it works! 🤪

@Misty84 how long are you waiting to test?

I usually don't bother, just wait for AF to come. But I've built up in my mind that I actually have been successful this month, so might test 10dpo Tues... Should wait til 12dpo really tho I know (been reading loadsa threads where people tested faint positive 10dpo tho & it's making it even harder to wait)

@Misty84 omg I hate it so much that everyone I know did none of this. The only person I know is my sister who needed clomid when she was in her 20s. All of my friends didn’t have this trouble and getting this stupid short straw really upsets me.

I mentioned something to one of mine once @Kitekat81 and she did the classic “just relax” and then proceeded to tell me again how they conceived around Christmas when having drinks etc both times (they were actively trying but it still only took 6 months). I should never have looked at my friends getting pregnant relatively easily in their mid 30s plus and assume I’d be the same .

Definitely google and see what works for you @KG1145. I dropped my seven seas ttc tablet today while getting water and it rolled right under the washing machine behind the leg so I guess I won’t be taking that one today.

@Marvellouslymadmum oh seed cycling is yet another attempt to increase my progesterone. You have two kinds of seeds in luteal phase and two kinds in follicular phase. Worst case it’s doing nothing, but I’ll happily eat some seeds daily if it means my hormones sort their shit out.

@thislittlebird ooh I'll have a google haha! I do feel like I had absolutely no clue at all when I had my now teenage children, I was 24 and 25 when I got pregnant with them and I did nothing to get pregnant other than come off contraception and dtd! Then apart from not eating the things I was told to avoid etc and take some folic acid I didn't do anything throughout the pregnancies either! It could not be more different now with all the things I'm doing and will continue to google amd do everything I can if this ever works for me!

@thislittlebird maca root is 'the aphrodisiac of the andes'! Lots of sperm friendly vits and minerals apparently. My partner is a GP and pretty sceptical about supplements so secretly baking it into banana cake was a skirmish free way of getting it into him. I'm not sure it would be any better than the wellman conception supplements but worth a punt.

Just so I can get up to speed, how long has everyone been trying (more or less, I can see it's a grey area for some) and how old are you all? I said yesterday that I'm 36 but I realised today that I'm actually 37! Damn!

@Noodella18 I'm 41 will be 42 next month, and came off contraception April/may 2018 so casually trying since then and actively tracking, suppliments etc since September last year, then stepping it up way more and adding everything I can find to do in and getting tests since January for me

Tbh @Marvellouslymadmum I think everyone would be similar to your past self if it worked. We stopped preventing and thought it would just work I guess, didn’t think I’d still be here no further along in 2021, no sign of a bfp whatsoever.

@Noodella18 thanks, I’ll do some googling on that one. Did you turn 37 recently?

We started trying when I was 36 in October 2019, then had to stop for a few months in early 2020 because I was ill, then continued again in the spring and are still trying, I’m not 37 and will be 38 in May. I find it hard to estimate how many cycles exactly because of the interruption and the months where we didn’t do it at the right time/very much at all...but maybe 13 months/cycles now? Something like that.

@Noodella18 I came off the pill when I was 37 but started actively trying at 38.5. Actively trying for 10 months and I'm now 39 😣 I didn't meet my partner until I was 37 so couldn't have started any earlier.

I met my partner when I was 29 but I was doing a degree when I met him and that finished in my mid 30s and didn’t want to do both at once. Error, should have just tried anyway

@climbershell

I've purchased 2 x frer and a clear blue digital, but can anyone recommend a batch of 10-20 paper strip cheapies? Keep seeing different opinions

Morning @climbershell I use the easy@home and got a faint BFP at 9-10 DPO last time. Make sure you get the ones that are sensitive to 10 HCG (sorry don't know units) not 25 if you want to test early. Got them on Amazon.

@thislittlebird it's one of those things that's very misconstrued- they tell you to be careful as you could get pregnant so easily and some people do so you believe it! You know some people struggle but that's it, you don't hear the ins and outs of it just that some people have fertility issues because it's something that no one talks about and it's not until you have issues yourself that you look into it more. I definitely think it should be less taboo and discussed more

Oh yes @Noodella18 forgot to say I've been with my partner 5 years too hence the delay in everything until this age and not stepping up sooner, but we got pregnant in 2017 without really trying and that unfortunately ended in mc then we waited a while moving house etc and decided to start again 2018 we've also had another mc and a couple of cp too.

@climbershell I dreamt I took lots of pg tests last night too that were all positive 😅 then I woke up and realised I am 39 and on cycle 13 sob I have been actively ttc since April last year.

Welcome @Noodella18 👋

Good luck to all in the 2ww would love to see some bfps on here soon 🙏

Oh and I ate my pineapple chunk this morning - that core is rather tough and bitter but I managed it! Woohoo

Hi @Noodella18
I met my partner when I was 34. We started trying 6 months later and have been trying ever since- I’m now 36.
19 cycles TTC so far. Just desperate to be a Mummy!

Hi @Noodella18 I'm 38, started trying May last year, fell pregnant in November but it ended in MMC. Still bleeding and hormones are all over the shop, I just wish I'd go back to a normal cycle so we can try again. Ironically the month I fell was when I thought I'd messed up the timings 🤷🏻‍♀️

@climbershell I’ve only ever tested early once and it was so disappointing to see a BFN that I just wait for AF now. I usually know when AF is coming because I start spotting for 2 days in advance. If I get no spotting I might be tempted to test! I’m like you- also optimistic this cycle, mainly because I added some new things so I’m cautiously hoping one of them did the trick!! 🤞😟

@thislittlebird I agree, the fact we’ve drawn the short straw is incredibly frustrating. I had to endure a baby shower zoom last night and everyone was exchanging stories about their young children or current pregnancies. I was just thinking “How on earth did you all manage it?!?”🥺
A friend of mine said she was on holiday when she conceived and so I should just try and relax like that (least helpful advice ever as we all know). It took her 2 cycles to conceive and she was 40. So, so lucky!!!

@Misty84 so sorry you had to endure that, it sounds like torture. Going through this has made me think that if I am ever lucky enough to get pregnant, I'm going to be so careful about how I tell people, because I know that my news could be bringing pain to someone else. No social media announcement, no 'gender reveal', and the thought of a baby shower fills me with horror!

We conceived on cycle 3 age 32 and for various reasons didn't start to try again until last year age 39. Had Mirena removed May, CP June then BFP July. With tracking and DTD during FW etc.
So at the time it seemed we conceived quite easily but then as I've mentioned already that pregnancy ended in TFMR. For me the BFP is only half the battle, but the stats don't lie- unfortunately it is much harder and riskier at this age. I don't think DH will be prepared to try for v long and the age gap with DD will become an issue so we will have to admit 'defeat' at some point soon I think.
In non-covid times, I think NHS advice is to seek medical advice straightaway regardless if over age 36 and TTC. I try not to spend too much time thinking 'what if' we'd tried 5 years ago...😕

@Kitekat81 I couldn’t agree more!!

@sickofthisyear it does worry me that a BFP is only half the battle...especially as can’t even get to that stage easily! 😟

@Marvellouslymadmum yeah totally agree. The taboo around it makes it worse because you feel so isolated and like you can’t talk about it. Part of the issue is also that people don’t get it, they think that because it was easy for them then you’re just being

There were three couples in our circle of friends without kids. We started trying before the other two and they announced they were expecting the end of last year, one was 39 and conceived very fast. That really compounded it for me, I think. Realising that my friends were conceiving without issue at similar ages so why not us?

Honestly @Misty84 you’re stronger than me, I think I would have been sick just in time for that baby shower. I’m dreading my friends having their kids just as we leave lockdown, I legitimately do not want to see any of them or be asked when we’re having any. They got lucky, we didn’t.

Like @Kitekat81 said, there’s no way I’m doing any announcement! if we get lucky and get a baby eventually. I’m not that sort of person anyway but I would not want to make someone else feel terrible and I wouldn’t trust everything would be ok until it was, if you know what I mean? If I ever get to tell people I might make a point of saying how hard it was. It didn’t just happen and everything was easy like many Facebook posts can lead you to believe.

And yeah agreed, I also worry a bfp is just the start, but like Misty I will have to cross that bridge when we come to it

Sorry, didn’t finish my sentence up there! *Part of the issue is also that people don’t get it, they think that because it was easy for them then you’re just being dramatic or not doing something right. When we got our results and there were problems my friend seemed to finally start taking my concerns about ttc seriously instead of telling me to relax.