Anyone else on the TWW and hoping for a Christmas miracle

[Amyc94]

Hi everyone,

This is our first cycle TTC, and whilst I promised myself I would stay calm and collected, truthfully I am the total opposite. I can't switch off from thinking about it.

It's taken my OH a while to come to terms with trying to start a family. Whilst we have been together since we were 15 (now 27) he always wanted to earn more, to have a bigger house etc but he's come to finally realise that it's never the right time and we just have to go for it. I was so so pleased he was finally ready but promised we would keep it relaxed and calm. If it happens, it happens,

But working from home and not having anything else to do, I just can't switch off from my mind wondering 🙈 wondered if there was anyone else in the same boat who just wants to chat really?

I'm due AF on Christmas Day so it would be such a Christmas miracle if she doesn't come.

@Foundmyfeet it’s a difficult one and I’m so sorry you’re in this predicament.

I do think if you would bond naturally from a donor to be honest. You’ll grow the baby and it’s so clearly very wanted I think once you get that BFP you probably won’t even think about it being a donor.

Would you want to try exhaust all your options of using your eggs first? xx

Hi Ladies, hope you're both ok? We are now in July - second half of the year! The countdown is on for the pitter-patter of tiny feet!

DH and I have come to a decision. We're not going to try any more treatment now. He still thinks it will happen naturally and maybe it will, but I can't go through the highs and lows every month so I'm just going to get on with life as normal; no charting, symptom spotting, wishful thinking, manifesting, praying etc.

We've got a couple of trips planned over the summer to look forward to and I've actually got a lot of work on. Plus I've got my hands full with a b*stard teenager! Lol!
There is always surrogacy and adoption but that will be an option a few years down the line perhaps.
I'm ok though. Honestly, a little gutted but I'm being quite pragmatic about it all. And I suppose, it's because I know I'm an old bird! Lol!

Hi @Foundmyfeet lovely to hear from you! Wasn't sure whether to message before, but really pleased you have 😃 so sorry you've really been through it! But it sounds like you've got some great stuff to look forward to for the Summer. TTC is exhausting, so I can only imagine how burnt out you feel, and you'll find the right option for you and DH after a break from it all I'm sure.

I'm good thanks. 28+1 so officially in the third trimester 🤯 where the hell has that gone! We are off to get our car seat this afternoon. Feeling a bit more prepared now x

Hey @Foundmyfeet ☺️ gutted for you, but I bet you feel like a weights been lifted after making a decision. Take it as it comes and don’t put all the pressure on yourselves. Enjoy your trips and drink all the wine ☺️.

All good at this end thank you. I’ll be 20 weeks on Monday and had my scan on Thursday. Baby girl looks healthy although she’s measuring on the smaller side which concerned me a bit, but still in the “normal” range.

Omg @ELBlack 3rd trimester already! It’s going soooo quick isn’t it! She’ll be here before we know it xx

Hey ladies!! How's things going??

@ELBlack is baby here yet?!❤️❤️

@Mariex1989 not long for you now also!! ❤️❤️

Hi @Foundmyfeet so nice to hear from you. Baby is here, been a traumatic roller coaster. www.mumsnet.com/Talk/parenting/4343453--Trigger-Warning-Poorly-baby-long-post?msgid=110926584 not sure if this link works, but here is some insight into her journey so far xx

Hey both! I was looking for this thread a couple weeks ago but my notifications had cleared so couldn’t just jump to it!

@Foundmyfeet I’m doing well so far thank you! 31 weeks tomorrow it’s absolutely flown by. Starting to struggle with the aches and pains now so will probably start dragging soon but it’s all part and parcel isn’t it!
How’re you? Any update with how you decided to proceed?

@ELBlack omg just read your thread. I’m so sorry to see what you’ve been through! How’re you feeling now? It sounds like your baby girl is a little warrior though! How’s she doing?
Congratulations though mamma!!! 💜

@Mariex1989 wow 31 weeks! That's gone so quickly. I absolutely loved 27-34 weeks 😍 was probably my favourite part as I had a bump and still felt good 😂

I'm alright. Lyra is 13 days old now, and has been home for 3 days. I'm still in a lot of pain due to the forceps and episiotomy, but I'm doing better each day. Emotionally I'm not great. I'm pretty sure I have either PTSD or PND from it. I'm angry about what's happened and I spend some days just crying all day and feeling so guilty, like I've failed her and my husband. The investigation is underway, and we will get her MRI results in a few weeks to see what (if any) brain damage she has suffered. So that's handing over me. Starting counselling on Tuesday xx

@ELBlack bless you I can’t imagine what you’re going through. You never really prepare for the what ifs or these awful circumstances.

I know it’s easier said than done but please don’t blame yourself or feel guilty for anything at all. You’re doing amazing by just supporting and loving her.

Waiting will absolutely be such a crappy time and I’m sure every possible scenario is playing over and over in your head 😔, but the fact she’s home can only be a positive!

That’s great that you’re doing counselling though, I’m sure it’ll be really helpful.

Ahhh Lyra, such a beautiful name too 😍 xx

@ELBlack many, many congratulations! I can't believe where those 9 months went.

I've read your post and it's awfully traumatic. I'm so sorry this happened to you. You will naturally go through the motions, particularly because your hormones are going haywire. Honestly, being a first time parent is extremely hard! The physical, mental and emotional adjusting you have to go through is immense so be kind to yourself because you also have the added trauma of the birth and the worry of Lyra's health. But babies are so robust!! And as @Mariex1989 has said, she sounds like a little warrior....made of tough stuff.
YOU are not a failure my darling...you and Lyra were failed by the maternity staff. I'm glad there is an investigation underway. They should be held accountable. But park that up and concentrate on yourself and your little family. I'm so pleased you are going to counselling today, that should help. It's easier said than done and I've certainly learned this the hard way, but try not to be angry. This causes stress and you do not need the added stress hormones to play havoc with you too. It also consumes so much precious energy, of which I'm sure, you require plenty of right now! Just concentrate on your beautiful baby girl whom you wanted so much and you now have because before you know it, she'll be a teenager! Lol!
I remember just wanting to keep my DD tiny forever. If I could've stopped time or put the overwhelming feelings of love and joy I had for her in a bottle, I would have done. Trust me, now she's a teen....I'd be re-opening that bottle on a regular basis! Lol!

@Mariex1989 - ah yes, the 3rd trimester....where I felt like my body was falling apart! I couldn't even wee without pain! Not long now though and you'll have your precious bundle in your arms.

We are not actively trying anymore. And that's ok with me. I have made "friends" with that fact. Anyway, all my godchildren are having their own children now so I feel a little bit past it if I'm honest! Lol!

@Foundmyfeet they don’t tell you how glamorous pregnancy really is do they 😂. She loves sticking her booty out which I feel like she’s gonna crack a rib when she does 🙈.
Had my midwife appointment today, and to say they were concerned she was “small” at my 20 week scan, she’s now measuring 49th percentile so almost bang on average so can’t complain at the pains as long as she’s growing nicely ☺️.

Aww I’m sorry to hear that, but as long as both you and hubby are happy and content then that’s all that matters. Bet it’s a bit of a relief that the decision was made and a weight off in a way.

@ELBlack hope your and Lyra are doing okay and your counselling went well ☺️

Xxx

Thank you both. Sorry, I struggle with the words to reply because thinking about it too much is too horrible. She's doing so well though, and cried and fussed from 7-3 like any other newborn would, refusing to be put down and cluster feeding 😂😅

@Foundmyfeet I hope you're at peace with your decision, and wish you all the best xx

@Mariex1989 sooo close now! Can't wait to hear about the arrival of your baby girl 🥰

@ELBlack aww don’t worry, it must be so hard for you all. But if you ever need to talk about it or just completely change the subject for a minute, we’re here ☺️.

That’s so good that she’s being a typical fussy newborn ☺️. Have you had the MRI results back yet? It’s frustratingly crazy how long the results take!!

Honestly can’t believe how quick it’s going. Some days I feel prepared for her arrival and others not at all, most days I still can’t actually believe there’s a human in my belly 😂 xx

How are you ladies doing?

@Mariex1989 is baby here yet? X

@ELBlack how are things with your little beauty? X

@Foundmyfeet @ELBlack hey ladies! Had an urge to jump on here and say hello and check in 😊

@Foundmyfeet I never saw this message!

Looking at the date I would have been in hospital getting induced then (was referred for lack of movement by MW). Had a pretty traumatic birth. Induction didn’t really go to plan. I was contracting but they said I wasn’t progressing. Had to beg to go down to labour ward where they palmed me off left right and centre, fast forward to 5 days later (still in hospital) and they finally examined me properly, baby was back to back which is why I wasn’t progressing but was in labour. Baby wasn’t doing well so had quick breaking of waters, episiotomy and forceps, but she was getting worse so off for an emergency section. From the distress of the labour she wasn’t doing too well so ended up in neonatal for a week. But we have a happy and healthy 9 month old now 😊.

how are you doing???

@ELBlack how are you and your little one?

xxx