Anyone been trying for 5 months plus and want to chat?

[AKcheer]

Going into cycle 6 after AF...feeling deflated! Anyone else been trying for this time and want to chat and keep each other company and positive words!?

@AKcheer

Going into cycle 6 after AF...feeling deflated! Anyone else been trying for this time and want to chat and keep each other company and positive words!?

10years and counting!

I also wonder. Has anyone told their friends or family their TTC and it hasn't happened yet?

I'd like to talk to my mum about it to understand if she had problems with conception. She had me at 35 and my brother at 38 so no spring chicken as far as the 80s/90s are concerned (1989 and 1992).

I have told my mum as I needed someone to vent to other than my DH.

Hey, can I jump on? Been trying significantly more than 5 months mind, on cycle 13 currently 😞
Finding it so hard to stay positive!

@AKcheer I really am 😩 I didn’t think at 26 it would be an issue at all, I naively thought it would happen within a few months!! DH has a DC from a previous shall we say encounter 🤣😅 so I definitely felt a lot of pressure that it’s MY fault it’s not happening for us. But I paid for private fertility checks and I’m apparently as fertile as I should be! It got hard, but I feel like I’m now at a point where I want it, but I’m not craving it as bad. It seems everyone who doesn’t want children have them quickly so 🥴 ugh. Yeah it’s so frustrating but, we will get there 🤍✨ they will be our perfect little bundle when we do!! How are you finding it? Xxx

@Theawkwardblonde cycle 11 for me 🙁 it’s bloody frustrating isn’t it!!! Everyone around me seems to be announcing pregnancies x

Morning everyone how you doing today?

@beanchopper17 10 years!? Wow would be good to know about your journey so far

@NatMoz I haven’t told anyone to be honest. I feel like if I do il either keep getting judged or people will ask me. I know how you feel though. My mom also had me super super late so I want to know whether she had issues and what they were but don’t know how to bring the topic up. I just feel so awkward about it. My mom literally had me at 40!!!

Hey @Theawkwardblonde welcome!! Oh wow how are you finding it? It is so hard to stay positive. Have you gone to the docs or anything yet?

@Izzie94 Oh dear!! I can imagine that naturally adds more pressure doesn’t it. It’s not your fault at all!! Look how many people are on this thread it takes time!! It’s only those unicorn fairytale people that get pregnant within a touch and that’s not us sadly 😂 I’m really intrigued to know about your private testing. Is there any info you can give me around that please so I can have a look? I’m finding it hard to be honest. Everyone around me is getting pregnant easily and I want this so bad. I see some people pregnant and have gave birth and they have a baby more for show and I just want a baby to love. I blame myself too. I’m 30 and DH is 33. I feel we put so much focus on our career and travelling on our 20s and now we’re here with good jobs but no meaning to life and I don’t know if I left it too late!!!

@NatMoz - I feel like we are having the exact same experience! Same age and attempts, and in October I was late and had all the symptoms (incl some spotting), but AF just showed up late. I decided to tell a friend who I don't see often; we message a lot but she lives far away. I felt like it was a nice outlet without pressure, plus she had IVF and a few struggles so is a wealth of knowledge.

We are also trying for our first, married for 4 years and together for 10. Starting to not enjoy the "baby dance" so much as it feels like there is so much pressure, which is such a shame. Really trying not to let it become a chore.

@Izzie94 - must be tough with him having a child previously but at least you can rule out there being problems there... I dunno just trying to be positive! As that is one thing I worry about! Interesting you went for private tests, was this just so you can get this done more quickly than NHS or do they test for other / more things? Great news the results were positive, just seems like a matter of time for you now :)

@AKcheer - Oh you defo haven't left it too late you're only 30! I am the same, I am 31 and DH is 35. I have a full on City job so this lockdown has been a blessing in some ways, as we have more time at home together. I am normally out the door at 630am and home at 8pm! But now we get more time in the mornings and it makes such a difference I think.

Some days I am relaxed about it all and tell myself it will happen, and other days I am googling bizarre things at 2am and unfollowing anyone who has a baby on instagram haha

@AKcheer well I can't get help or investigation because I am over weight, I know I have insulin resistance PCOS and under active thyroid. Cycles are usually around 50-80days long, completely erratic! My mental health has taken a beating over the years, seeing friends and family announce their great news broke me time after time.

I was beyond shocked to find out I was pregnant last April, but sadly lost the pregnancy at 7 weeks.

The doctors are terrible at given advice for PCOS and the related symptoms, their advice is to lose weight, really hard to do with PCOS and under active thyroid. But I found a group on Facebook (Healthy PCOS), he offers so much information about how to to help ease the symptoms.

I thought might as well try supplements as the prescribed metaformin has done nothing. I am taking a crazy amount of supplements which cost a fortune, but I got the most positive OPK on Sunday, I have never seen the test line stronger than the control line before, I actually cried! Plus that would make this cycle 36 days long!

I am hopeful that the supplements are working and I can do have the baby I so desperately want!

@Rose2108
@AKcheer

Feel the same. Spent my twenties enjoying my youth, travelling and saving. Now we've got a family home plus a BTL. Stable jobs, financially secure, happy marriage. All big ticks but no baby to make things complete.

When my AF trots on by (due today, I'm not pregnant so take me away from this misery!) OH has said we should have sex every day for the next month until AF next due date. He said he'll even come home at lunchtime!!

Sex will become a chore like washing the dishes at this rate but he's more determined than me!!!

I tried the cheap one step ovulation tests but during what was supposed to be my ovulation window it was blank. Not sure if I was doing it right or should try the more expensive versions?

I suppose it won't matter if I have sex everyday although at this rate I'll get more than a sex slave the way my husband is going on!

@AKcheer hahaha I know!! I swear everyone in real like claims to have only take a month or so 🙄 must admit I don’t believe all of them. But defo adds pressure doesn’t it! I just googled private fertility testing near me, they tested my overall fertility health which included - Trans-vaginal scan using a specially designed ultrasound probe
Checking the size, shape and condition of your uterus
Find out when you will be ovulating – for conception or egg gathering
Check individual follicles in your ovaries
Measure and track any follicles to ensure they’re developing as expected
Check your reproductive system for problems such as polyps or cysts
Check endometrial lining
Full medical report of the examination and findings
Thermal images to be taken away for review with clinicians
I also had blood tests on top of this! ☺️ For £150.00! It definitely helped me relax knowing everything is how it should be, but now I’m wondering why it’s taking so bloody long 😂
You definitely haven’t waited too late!!! But I can understand why you’d feel an added pressure there. And it’s SO annoying those who don’t really want children but do it to tick a box 🙄 our time will come lovely 🤍✨

@Rose2108 oh definitely!! Zero issues there, so it’s just a waiting game and I’m SO impatient!! I just popped above what they tested for, I had this because DH has a DC already the doctors will only run day 21 bloods on me, other than that, we have to pay due to already have a child from one of us, the nhs won’t do anything else 😅 thanks lovely. Hopefully by Christmas we will all be getting the news we want 🥰 x

Morning everyone 🥰

@AKcheer honestly the BFN never gets easy does it? Even when you kind of suspect it’s going to be there seeing it is awful. Weird you mention about spotting and never noticing it before because I am the same! I don’t think I ever had it but as you mentioned maybe it’s just because we never paid attention before. When TTC you notice everything don’t you?! My husband suggested I stop testing until AF actually arrives but then my body does that thing where it delays my period and I get all excited and test just to see the BFN again and then AF arrives after. Awful how your body does that sometimes isn’t it?!
I was talking to my friend last night (she is one who fell pregnant within 2 months of TTC) and she suggested using an app called Clue. I don’t know if you’ve heard of it but it asks for all of your symptoms and gives you predictions and things of your cycles. I’ve logged everything on there now but I use Premom and have been since I started this journey. Just ordered a load more ovulation tests ready for next month.
Honestly I think I’m a bit obsessed with testing my wee haha! I reckon a lot of the girls on here will be too. Have you fallen down the 2ww YouTube video rabbit hole yet? I’m there every month 😂

Morning @JLP256 honestly I’ve been told by so many people and you see it all over but it still doesn’t help! My sister has PCOS and she fell pregnant just after taking her implant out so I just thought it would happen to me too with no PCOS but silly of me to assume that really. It’s just not how it works really. I know you mentioned you are on cycle 5... are you doing anything like OPKs for testing or just seeing what happens when trying at the moment?

I hope everyone’s alright today. Good luck to you all no matter what stage you’re at 🥰 xx

Love how many people have replied to this!!

Question for everyone: Has anyone taken Coq-10? Apparently it helps with egg quality?

@Rose2108 I’m glad to hear your in the same boat and thanks for the reassurance!! It’s nice isn’t it spending time together? My day was exactly like yours...no time for anything and then just too tired to do anything else lol. Can I also ask why is everyone on insta pregnant!? 😂😂

Ohh @beanchopper17 I’m so sorry to hear all of that. Sounds like you have a lot going on. I’m also so sorry to hear about your MC. Must have been so hard for you. I don’t know too much about PCOS but i have come across lots of people with it on these forums. It’s sad that you haven’t got the right support from your GP too. Hopefully things will start to look up and your vitamins will help. Exciting about the OPK - please keep us updated!!!

@NatMoz I feel you!! Oh wow everyday? You’re going to be busy hahahaha. I don’t know how I feel about doing it everyday!! It can get repetitive. I told my hubby to bring new skills this month gone and he really bought his A Game!! My AF is also due today or tomorrow so he’s probably going to panic about making it more interesting next month hahahaha. I just use cheaply OPKs from Amazon. They are the pre mom ones and you just take a pic and upload on the app and I’ve always found them useful :)

@Izzie94 it sounds like for £150 they check a lot and it’s nice to know you have piece of mind as well after you’ve gone for that!! Did it take long to get the results? I might have a little mooch you know online. See if I fancy it too!!
Yes our time will come! Hopefully we will all get a really nice Christmas present or a nice way to start 2020 with!!

Morning!

@Kirby173 I used the CB digital OPKs for a couple of months which were great but so expensive, so switched to the Boots one this month. Didn’t get on so well with them and didn’t seem to get a positive result, although probably just missed it or used it wrong 😂. We DTD every other day for about 12 days to try to catch it either way. Also on your app point, I’ve been using Clue since before TTC for cycle tracking and it’s great, but I’d say stick with whichever one you’ve used the longest as it’s probably the most accurate for you by now - if that makes sense?

@AKcheer @NatMoz @Rose2108 I feel the same. I’m around the same age and I’m glad I travelled etc in my 20s but we’re hoping to move into a family home early next year (if lockdown allows) and just really hoping we can fill it soon! I also go between being really relaxed and unfollowing anyone on Instagram with babies 😂

@Izzie94 yep totally can relate to that. Close family friends had a baby 2 weeks ago, 2 of my best mates are pregnant and a few more at work just announced that they are. I feel bad as I can't even look at pictures of our friends baby it upsets me that much as we started trying before then. Obviously very happy for them but it's just upsetting.

@AKcheer I've just been for my day 21 bloods as they messed up my last ones. DH is awaiting his referral to go through for private fertility testing. It's taking its toll on us, not going to lie. I'm in the mindset now that it will never hawkish if I'm honest. I've had at least 4 chemicals too which has messed me up a bit too. Sorry to sound so depressing 😂

Not heard about coq-10. I'm taking the seven seas TTC folic acid and husband is on well man conception. Although debating scrapping those as its clearly not made a blind bit of difference.

I'm starting to panic with age-I'm 29 and husband is 34 in a couple of weeks.

Good afternoon everyone!

AF arrived properly for me this morning which I was expecting but I think OH is more disappointed than he's letting on.

At least it means a new month! I'm trying to decide if its worth the stress of doing OPK's this time. Does anyone else find them as impossible as me? Trying to fit them in when you already pee constantly and don't drink enough, whilst also trying to increase your water intake is a mission.

So cycle day 1 for me and I hope we start to see some BFPs on this thread soon. I'm crossing my fingers for an early Christmas present!

Just wanted to say that I went onto cycle 13 before conceiving DD2. I felt really worn out and down about TTC and honestly thought it was never going to happen. My beautiful 7w old baby is asleep on me now. We didn’t have any medical interventions. It just took us a while to conceive her.

Try not to lose hope.

Hi @JLP256 I looked into the Clearblue OPKs and you are right they are ridiculously expensive!!! I’m using premom ones at the moment and for about £15 you get 50 LH tests and 20 pregnancy tests. So far so good as I’ve had positives every month and seen it drop using the tests. Don’t know if it’s worth you having a look at those? You can get them on amazon and the reviews are fab!
Yeah with the apps I’m going to stick with the Premom one but I’ve backdated everything on Clue symptom wise which was a faff. I’m going to start using them both because the more info the better, right?! But yeah makes total sense! Weirdly Clue predicted AF today but my Premom didn’t but AF has fully arrived so I’m hopeful Clue might be a bit better! Xx

Hi @Bowsie15 seems like AF is visiting us both today 🙄 I guess it’s good in a way because we can start this cycle together with all these other lovely ladies! I think it’s hard on partners too but I don’t know about you, I feel like I’m letting him down by not conceiving which is horrible because I’m doing everything I can argh!!! I do OPKs from Premom and it took me a few months but now I understand them (I think)?! It’s worth watching a few YouTube videos of people explaining and showing charts to understand them. As I mentioned above to @JLP256 the Premom ones are £15 a month basically. That’s what I’ve been using so far. The instructions explain how the testing works too but would recommend having a look at some videos. There are loads out there on this specific brand too. If you struggle though I will try and explain as much as I can with my experience of using them! Xx

Aww @BeingATwatItsABingThing hi! Thank you so much for this. It’s nice to hear there is light at the end of the tunnel. I think when you are stuck waiting and cycle after cycle you see that BFN you just assume it will never happen, don’t you? So happy for you though 🥰 xxx

@Kirby173

My first DD was conceived whilst I was on the pill so struggling to conceive didn’t really worry me. I assumed we’d be fine. Each month I got a BFN or someone announced their pregnancy, my mood for lower and lower. I turned into a horrible person and couldn’t feel happy for others. I still struggle with other people’s pregnancies now and I’ve had my baby. TTC really screws with you.

I really hope you all get your BFPs soon.

@Kirby173 Premom sound good, I am using femometer, they are good but I find I get nothing if I have even a sip of water for 2 hours before! And by then I have such a headache! @Bowsie15 I find CM is a better indicator, do you ever monitor this? A whole new world, lol.

Thanks @BeingATwatItsABingThing, good to hear a positive story of a long TTC period, I have a feeling ours will take about a year, I don't know why. But I find mentally because I have given us a year I am not too stressed at the moment, month 6. I think as it goes on I will start to worry more.

@NatMoz Blimey that is one committed Husband lol I don't think mine could manage that poor bloke! It's so nice you are enjoying it though and still making it fun.

@JLP256 @AKcheer lol, I am sure it is just our age group now, and we probably had all these kind of pictures on social media before but just notice it more now? We moved last year into a bigger house and everyone keeps saying what a lovely family home it is.. I am going to punch someone soon lol

@JLP256 hey how was your day!? Awww that’s exciting. Have you found your family home? Fingers crossed that your family journey begins very soon! I know it’s strange isn’t it sometimes I can also be relaxed other times I’m an emotional wreck!

@Theawkwardblonde They messed it up first? That’s so annoying. You’ll need to keep us posted on your results. Hopefully your DH will also get his testing done ASAP. It must be quite hard during covid don’t know if times are impacted etc. It must be hard and exhausting to be honest. I understand how you feel. I really hope everything works out for you and your tests are ok too. Fingers crossed. And if your feeling down I’m sure we can all cheer you up. It’s a hard journey and we just have to be there for each other!!

@Bowsie15 how was your day? I’m waiting for mine it is due to tomorrow but got those horrid pains! Oh no got to keep your OH positive!! So I use OPKs and because I’m working from home it’s easy so I have a calendar reminder at like 3pm to do then. I don’t do them everyday I just do it when I remember to be honest. I’m not too sure how I feel about them. Let’s hope in a months time you come back with a xmas present BFP!!! How nice would that be xx

@BeingATwatItsABingThing Hey thanks for sharing your experience. It’s nice to hear some positive stories and will keep us positive!!!

@Rose2108 Hahaha I think your right you know! Aww man! That’s exactly the same as us. Everyone sometimes just looks at us like well!? I’m trying to par it off and tell everyone I’m a get a dog but I don’t think that’s going to stop the questions lol. I just don’t want to tell people I’m actively trying!!!

@AKcheer thanks for your kind words!
I just want to know if something is up. I'm in the 2ww currently. Due AF in 4 days and got my usual cramps etc so not holding out much hope.
So hard to remain positive! My DH and I have bath just changed shifts so we are rarely seeing each other which isn't helping DTD 😂😂
Family are aware we are trying as I had a rather nasty chemical a few months ago which had some knock on effects. It would be the first grandchild so everyone is pestering us which doesn't help! 🤣🤣🤣

@Kirby173 it's nice to be at the same point in a cycle as others isn't it, it feels so lonely when everyone's talking about their 2ww and you're still waiting for ovulation. I've probably missed it but are you trying for your first too? I've been using the femometer opks so far but I do want to try some different ones so might get the Premom. I find I get highs on them, but I've only had a peak one month so far and I think I'm just missing it or not testing at the right times.

@Rose2108 I've started to try and track CM the last month or two and think I'm getting a pattern. Do you find it a lot more reliable?

@AKcheer I've had a standard boring day because I'm currently furloughed due to lockdown. But on the positive side there will be plenty of time for DTD soon! How has yours been? Still waiting for AF? If you're like me you just want a new cycle to start and get going already.

@Theawkwardblonde no problem!! Oh no!! Oh dear you and your DH are going to have to find that 30 min slot to fit in the deed!! 😂😂 what a nightmare! Aww I know how you feel! Same situation here would be the same and first grandchild!! And all eyes on us!!

@Bowsie15 Oh no. That’s not good. Any idea when you’ll go back to work? Have you found any exciting hobbies during this lockdown? It’s been busy just working from home to be honest! I’m still waiting for AF too. Glow said today and FLO says in 2 days. It’s so annoying when the apps say different things!! But I’ve got bad cramps keep feeling like it’s here so il just wait! I just want AF so I can start fresh!!!!

@AKcheer I’m good thanks, still waiting for AF too...this is a v long cycle for me so not sure if/when to test again but will probably hold on a bit to see what happens! How are you feeling?

Hope everyone is doing ok 😊