Conception: TTC Baby no1. The crazy lot. Thread 3!!!

[butterfly5291]

Starting a new thread...

@stepmumSW5 oh god! A nice array of things to keep yourself busy! Good luck with the test, will you have to wait with all the backlogs? 24 weeks though, how wonderful 🥰 are you feeling okay? No, I'm still out working though it's been whittled down to 3 mornings a week at the minute. Fiancé is furloughed. Just had a live funeral stream this morning for a family member that passed away from covid.. It's certainly a weird time!

@Stabal I'm so sorry for your loss. One of my closest friends just had the same. Zoom funeral of a family member. That must be horrible. My sincere condolences.💐

All doing good apart from the joys of lockdown and covid. I haven't applied yet for the tests so I don't know but I hope I get it before the little one comes.

Good luck to us 😘

@MiniBaker how’re you getting on? I had the results of my 21 day bloods back today and all fine. DP can’t go for this SA though as apparently they’ve halted appointments at the moment due to lockdown.

AF is due Saturday. Feel no different this month and EWCM has dried up so not a good sign.

Hope everyone is well and doing the best they can in these truly awful times xxx

Hi I’m a bit worried it’s my 4th month trying for a first child and I’ve got ovulation strips that I’ve been using .. I’ve done 4 tests now during the day and from last year and they’re all positive and they’re all the same darkness .. what do you reckon is going on?

Hi @sunshineandshowers3

I am so sorry for not getting back to you sooner! I had a break this month from Mums Net after my breakdown on New Years Day when I just laid in bed and cried I vowed not to obsess to much this year. I didn’t get a notification of your @ otherwise I would have replied sooner.

Great that your bloods came back normal, shame about the SA but I’m sure they’re absolutely fine. Did your doctor have any other advice?

I’ve not been tracking, looking at when I ovulate or anything at all this month so not really sure when my period is due but it will most likely turn up within the next week.

Where are you in your cycle? How has it been for you this month?

xxx

@MiniBaker No need to apologise - I think we all need those MN breaks from time to time. Sorry to hear about new year 😔. My disappointment seems to grow each month. It’s as if when another month has gone and it hasn’t happened I just convince myself it’s getting less and less likely.

The past three months when my period has arrived a close friend has told me she’s pregnant on the exact same day. November was a friend who had only been trying for a few months, December was the same and then this month was a friend who has been trying for two weeks and had a 2nd round of successful IVF. Obviously the latter gives me so much hope and I am genuinely happy for them all- but it still hit me like a tonne of bricks.

In an odd way the fact it’s lockdown and I won’t be able to see them is a blessing. That sounds awful doesn’t it? I just wouldn’t be able to face it atm.

Doctors advice was to stop stressing and ‘by the time DP goes for SA you’ll probably be pregnant’. Wish I had his optimism!

I have everything crossed for you this month, I really really do 😊. We need some positive news on the horizon!

I’m due to ovulate on Monday 1st. BD yesterday and will do tomorrow and probably every other day (will try Saturday and Sunday as more time at the weekend). I’m not going to do any OPK’s. Only thing I’m going to try differently this cycle is we’re finally going to brave using pre-seed 😂 and lots of doggy style I think! 😳😂 < (the things you put on MN).

I’m going to try drinking a lot of water each day too and grapefruit juice first thing in the morning! Xx

@sunshineandshowers3 Ahh I see! We’ve altered a little in our cycles as I think I’m just about to start my period - had a little bit of spotting so just waiting for it now but not feeling that upset this month as I wasn’t trying at all last month.

I can completely empathise with how your feeling about your friends pregnancy announcements I think that if this last year has taught us anything it is that many things in life can’t be planned - pregnancy really is one of them! If it could be we would be pregnant right now.

Would love to know how you get on with pre-seed! I was talking to my husband about that today actually as I’m convinced it’s because I don’t get EWCM which is why I’m not getting pregnant. But he said we’re still not at the year mark so we should wait until May before we start trying anything else. Which I’m okay with because i’ve just changed my mindset this year and I’m not in a rush anymore. This month was way better for staying relaxed and positive, just having sex when we felt like it and sort of relinquishing control of the ‘sex schedule’ to just doing it when we’re both really in the mood.

Hope this is your lucky month 🍀 how do you keep on track with drinking the water? I really struggle with drinking enough water too!

xxx

Yes we seem to have. Mine for the past couple of months now have been 24 days, so slightly on the short side. Sorry to hear about the spotting - any chance it could be implantation bleeding? I think your outlook is fantastic going into this year. I really need to calm down and just relax. Not with an ulterior motive so if I do that I’ll get pregnant- just that I genuinely need to relax! 😂

You’re so right - we can’t plan it and it’s completely out of our control. I keep thinking if I’d conceived first month I’d be due this Feb, but trying to block those thoughts out as they’re not helpful or constructive and well, it didn’t happen that way, did it?!

Would you say the amount you had sex was more or less this month as you weren’t stressing or tracking it? Will definitely let you know how I get on with pre-seed (even if there is an embarrassing story in there too 😳😂). I get little EWCM but grapefruit juice has actually really helped (and I don’t even mind the taste now!)

Your husband is completely right though- we’re not even at the year mark and have a good few months between now and then 😊.

In terms of water I just try and drink lots throughout the day. I’ve got up, had my glass of grapefruit and a pint of water and that’s before going to work. We have a water cooler at work and I have a 500ml bottle that I try to top up 3/4 times throughout the day.

Then always a couple of big glasses in the evening and one before bed! X

@MiniBaker Pre-seed update! 😂 it was actually fine to use. I was worried about err...well...too much ‘slippage’ but it was actually really good to use. I think we’ll try and use it every time this month! 👍🏻

@sunshineandshowers3

Great to hear the preseed was good to use! Hope it does the trick for you 🙏

You’re so good with the water and the grapefruit juice. I might pick up the grapefruit juice again maybe. I literally have seen stretchy discharge once in the whole time we’ve been trying. Sometimes I do get a really clear watery but it’s not stretchy at all. But the discharge does change throughout the cycle so I do know roughly when im fertile and when ovulation has passed.

My period came in the end and it was pretty light again - I definitely think the acupuncture helped with increasing the blood flow as my period was so much heavier that month. Will pick that up again once lockdown ends.

I completely empathise, I keep having those thoughts every now and then too about I would be due shortly if it had happened. But for some reason it hasn’t and I just think we’re too early to think about other options so may as well just relax in to it.

I think we actually had the same amount of sex as we had when trying but it was just more enjoyable 😂 because I wasn’t thinking about it as purely baby-making.

How is the TWW going for you?

xx

Thank you ❤️ If it doesn’t this month I will definitely use it in future months though.

Yeah mine is never what I’d call stretchy - but the grapefruit juice has improved the quantity. I’ve always been a big water drinker... I suffer from migraines if I don’t drink a lot so fortunately I’ve always been in the mindset of drinking a lot of water.

Sorry it came - but onwards and upwards to the next month for us both 😊. What do you class as a light period? Mine has pretty much always been 3/4 days at a max.

Yes - that’s the best outlook to have. In the grand scheme of things it’s still very early days (even if it doesn’t feel like it sometimes!).

Trying to focus on time together as a couple. A few friends of mine that have struggled said it really affected their relationship (in a negative way) and I really don’t want that to happen.

I think I ovulated yesterday - so start of TWW. DTD Friday, Saturday, Sunday and yesterday and will try and DTD tomorrow. Far too shattered tonight!

Have you finished your period now? Xx

@MiniBaker how’re you getting on? Into month 10 here and due to ovulate Friday 29th. Clutching at straws over what I can do differently this month.

Hope you’re well ❤️❤️Xxx

@sunshineandshowers3

Well after 2 months off of tracking and I have definitely felt more relaxed BUT I just saw some spotting this morning so I think I am due my period again... so it’s still not working for me. Feeling very frustrated with my body and why it won’t work properly 😔 I just feel so unwomanly and it’s horrible. I’m not sure whether to go back to tracking or not as it seems like whatever I do it doesn’t work! How are you doing? Hopeful news from Boris though. Are you still going ahead for your wedding? xx

@MiniBaker Really really hope your spotting isn’t AF, feel invested in you getting a BFP and really hope it happens soon for you.

Unwomanly is exactly how I feel. You’ve hit the nail on the head perfectly there.

I am due to ovulate at the weekend but trying to be relaxed as possible about it all. Really going to try and DTD this month every other day. We ALWAYS burn out and then after ovulation can easily go a week without DTD. Have noticed an increase in EWCM and been taking grapefruit juice every day.

Wedding is now re-arranged to April 2022 just for peace of mind. Always hoping we can conceive before then but looking doubtful 😔.

Sending you lots of love ❤️I always find the lead up to a potential AF the hardest part of the month so please be kind to yourself xx

@sunshineandshowers3
Yeah I hate the lead up to AF as it’s just like - come on, I know you’re coming so just fully arrive already!

That’s great the grapefruit juice is working for you. I’m hoping to get back to acupuncture tomorrow when they open again as I’m pretty sure that was working for me I just needed to give it a couple months. It made my period significantly heavier which I think might be one of my issues as I don’t really get that much blood now when I compare how my periods used to be when I was younger before I went on the pill.

Aww that gives you plenty of time! Fingers crossed your little baby can join you guys. I’m really routing for you too! xx

@sunshineandshowers3
Hope you are having a good weekend and had a productive fertile week!. I’m having a really paranoid day going in to our 10th month of TTC without anything having happened, not a whiff of a pregnancy and it’s really upsetting me. Positive news though, i’ve managed to get booked in for acupuncture this month so i’m planning 3 months of sessions in the lead up to ovulation and see if that does the trick! TTC and keeping it a secret is hard.

@MiniBaker Hi 😀 it’s weird that we’ve never met and yet I know we would just instantly be friends! I completely completely get what you mean. The past few months have been huge lows for me anytime AF has showed up.

I feel the same. When people say they have been trying as long as us and had miscarriages or chemicals, I obviously feel deep sadness for them but also feel that at least they have had ‘potential’ pregnancies. I’ve had nothing. Not one inkling. In truth, I don’t know how I feel anymore.

Everyone around me (including DP) seems to think it’s stress that’s the problem but I just don’t think it is. All the worries of 1) I started my period so young 2) they’ve always been light and short gaps in between and 3) we’ve been trying and using the notoriously bad ‘pull out’ technique for years and not had any accidents keep circling around in my head.

I’ve knocked the OPK’s on the head this month so don’t really know when/if I’ve ovulated 🤷‍♀️. Clue app says Friday just gone, flo says tomorrow and glow says today so lord knows which is right.

I’ve tried to be chilled this month - so we’ll see what happens. Have DTD this morning (we literally NEVER have morning sex) so will see if anything comes from there.

I’m dreading May arriving tbh and hitting the 1 year mark, but desperately trying to stay positive. We went on a long walk today and saw our neighbours who live opposite out with their two daughters (3 and 6 months). My DP had a small interaction with the 3 year old and his face lit up and it took all my energy not to cry.

Gosh what a rollercoaster we’re on!

We’ve had lovely sunshine this weekend... hope you have too 😚xxx

@sunshineandshowers3
You couldn’t have worded it any better! Exactly how I feel. When people have had miscarriages and chemicals I feel like that must be a horrible experience to go through but also in a way it’s like there must be some comfort in knowing that something has happened - they have been able to get pregnant.

I really committed to relaxing and being positive the past two months but nothing happened... so I’m going back to acupuncture, 3 sessions leading up to ovulation for 3 months and then regroup...

I’m dreading reaching May too. I just can’t wait to hear you get a BFP. It would be amazing if we got them together!

Have you looked in to having Fallopian tubes checked for blockages? My mum was saying about it being a common cause as if you’ve ever had an infection in the past, scar tissue can build up and block the Fallopian tubes. I might ask my GP about it...

It’s a long and winding road xxx

@MiniBaker @sunshineandshowers3 as someone who has been through a miscarriage I can assure you that it is of no comfort whatsoever that I got pregnant. It took 2 years to conceive that baby and I lost it at 9 weeks in a very traumatic missed miscarriage. Next month will mark a year since I fell pregnant and I've had no luck falling pregnant since.

@MiniBaker Yes I don’t want to take away from their pain, but we currently don’t even know if pregnancy is physically possible in the first place.

Yes I think I might be back on the OPKs next month if this turn has been unsuccessful. We all know the small window each month where we can actually get pregnant and I’d hate to be missing it (although theoretically DTD every other day should cover ourselves).

I need to look more into acupuncture, but I really do hope it works for you.

Gosh it would be amazing - really hoping for 2021 babies for us both! People who say they don’t want a Christmas baby...I’d take any baby!

I have heard about that and may look into it. Because of lockdown DP still hasn’t been able to have his SA so hopefully by the end of the month this can be sorted. That’s our next port of call.

@Stabal I am so sorry to hear what you have been through and didn’t mean to cause offence. We’re all in this together ❤️Xxx

@sunshineandshowers3
Oh yes completely - I can imagine it’s a horrible thing to go through.

DTD every other day should have you covered but I guess for the full 25% chance it’s having sex on the actual ovulation day itself isn’t it... I’m thinking about suggesting SMEP to my husband again this cycle.

Acupuncture definitely did something last time I had it so I just hope it works as it is about £45 a session but an investment well worth it if it does the trick!

That’s frustrating that DP hasn’t been able to have his SA but at least he should be able to get in for that soon and hopefully you can tick that off the list. If he is young and healthy with no history of issues then he’s most likely fine though but it is nice to have that confirmation.

I’m guessing you are in the TWW now - I actually quite like that time of the month as it’s full of hope and anything could happen!

Are you going back in to school next week or has you been working all the way through?

@Stabal I didn’t mean any offence either. It was just some women on others threads have said they have taken some comfort in knowing they could get pregnant. Sorry to hear you have had a tough journey. Have you visited your GP?

@sunshineandshowers3 @MiniBaker I also don't know if I can physically get pregnant. It happened once in 2 years of actively trying and I'd had many years not on contraception previously and nothing happened. Even if I do manage to fall pregnant again I have no idea whether I can carry a pregnancy to viability so it's not any kind of comfort to get pregnant if I can't keep my baby alive. It's torture every day, "why did it happen then, why hasn't it happened again, will I lose another baby if it does happen, what is wrong with my body". Most women say 'at least I got pregnant' as a defense mechanism to divert their hurt when talking about it so please think before you say anything on the subject with no experience. Yes, I've been to my GP. We were starting treatment when I fell pregnant, I was waiting for my period to arrive to ring and book in for my HSG but it never came. I've now had an HSG since the miscarriage and my OH is awaiting his repeat semen analysis but our clinic is suspended services right now.

@stabal
It sounds like we all have real similarities and are all sharing the same worries I guess. I appreciate your perspective and hadn’t thought about it that way. We put so much pressure on ourselves as women and it’s just it’s such a great outlet that we can share how we feel and support each other on here.

Was the HSG a painful experience? I had been looking in to that but I wasn’t sure how you go about getting referred. Have either of you read about Anna Victoria’s journey?

annavictoria.com/infertility-trying-to-conceive/