Oreo 🍫 , 🍷 , puffy sex & BFPs by snaccident #dirtydozen

[SmileyT]

Have you seen our guide to getting pregnant?🤣

1. Lots of sex (every other day to catch) or SMEP or just Banging OH to death seems to work for some - For the same sex couples out there; Insemination using a cup (easily available on Amazon) Bum up after the goods are deposited... don’t leave it in the cup for ages before you put it in ✌🏾

1. Relaxing & lots of patience

1. Prenatal vitamins e.g Pregnacare, COQ10, Primrose oil, B6, B12, Calc Flour, Folic acid/Folate, Magnesium, Vit C (will have to do your research on amounts/when to take these)

1. Conceive plus/preseed - if you haven’t had enough assfruit juice and you aren’t moister than an 🦪 💦

1. Seed cycling - make sure you ground them up

1. Grapefruit juice (ass juice) for EWCM - CM should be stretchy sometimes hard to tell the difference between cum if you get loads of action.

7.OPKS/CB Digital ovulation kits 😂 A lot of us seem to like fermometer to record the OPK peaks

1. It will happen when it's meant to but not necessarily the month you want it to 😩

9.Wine, pizza, oreo choc and pouffe sex

10.Relax, dont be stressed, take bbt, dont take bbt, dont obsess, obsess, exercise, don't exercise too much, loose weight, don't loose too much weight, eat healthy, don't let it consume you and eat what you want apart from too much alcohol, caffeine, cigs obvs

11.PMS/ early pregnancy symptoms are the same and the progesterone likes to trick you.

And most of all it isn’t your fault, blame corona for all BFN

@lucyrp I'm praying this is short lived like 😱. My friend weighed less the day she gave birth than when she got pregnant. She's always been a bigger girl but honestly that kid sucked the life out of her 😂. Maybe the next baby will get you back to 8 stone 8? Be careful what you wish for 😂😂😂

@Mococo1 thank you. Brushing my teeth made me wretch this morning so I think mint chewing gum is out but I shall try the ginger biscuits. How cruel is that, the only thing that will stop you feeling sick is eating. I'll be 5 stone heavier by the time I have this kid 🙄

@Noble89 mr friend who's just had her little boy literally weighs less now than she did before she got pregnant 😂😂 I mean I wouldn't say no to 8 stone 8 but at least then I could eat a few takeaways and it would improve my figure 😂

@LV1987 yeah exactly and it always was before taking the agnus so decided it wasn't worth it. Haha lucky OH you mean 😜 we've just done it this morning after Dh had a workout so now he's thigh kill even more lol! I think that's us done now unless I can get him one last time tonight...😏 and then tww starts tomorrow, yay can't wait...not! 😒

@Mococo1 @Juno231 I had such good skin as a teenager, sister always said it was unfair and that one day I will suffer 😂 I was also underweight and my periods didnt start till I was 16 😳 hoping this is a phase as well

@Noble89 my friend couldn't brush her teeth in the morning s as it made her ill, but was fine if she brushed them a good hour or two after brekkie. (she acctually came into work and brushed them then)

I'm loving this book ladies - apparently drinking alcohol doesn't affect fertility 💃.

I didn't want to poop on your oreos before but apparently sugar really affects it 😅. Per the stats in the book (using 18k women for the research), women on a low GI diet (so no spikes of sugar) were twice as likely to conceive within the first six months as women who ate things like white bread/pasta/potatoes/rice etc. Even one extra fizzy drink per day had a 16% impact on ivf success 🤔.

Hi guys this thread gives me jokes! A bit of wine some Oreos some vitamins and a bit of a$$ seems the way forward!! It’s really nice reading threads like this as helps me relax! My SIL has gone in to give birth today (we don’t get on - she hates me!!) but she’s only been married to my brother (he was adopted - who also hates me!) for a couple of years. I been married for 5 now but me and hubby have spent time enjoying our life going on hols etc - so I’m sure in the next day or so I’m going to get so much pressure ahh!

I have a question for you though - after you guys have DTD do you lie there with legs up - do you pee straight after and clean up? What should I be doing!? Please experts help me!! (I’m fairly new to the TTc journey - this month will be my 2nd month)

Thank you!!

@Minster2012 medium rare 👌🏼 and yep, that stick is pretty darn white xx sorry love but go get those pills!

@Noble89 I personally like to go straight to hard drugs rather than being a hero and suffering through. Prescription for anti nausea should take the edge off. Otherwise ginger tea and lollies!

@Minster2012 yes still in limbo bit of nausea yesterday for the first time in a while but otherwise nothing happening.

@AKcheer welcome, you'll love it here 😊
So apparently legs up does nothing but lying still for 10 mins afterwards could help the swimmers. I can only lie there for about 5 mins before I'm up and cleaning up tho 😂

@LV1987 @Skip86 I'm a steaks have to be mooing 🐄kinda girl, I literally eat them blue with a hot sauce, very rarely get steak in a restaurant as they will always overdo them for fear of giving them out like that

I've said this before @juno231 My IVF clinic advises having a relaxing glass of wine or g&t the night before embryo transfer for us previously, so my best friend (our surrogate) had a couple of g&ts & a v hot bath at ours the night before the transfer of now DS to her & did mine last time that got BFP but ended in MMC I did the same, took g&t to the bath & so that's the attitude I have. I'm also very lucky to have DS I know it might be different for those if you going for baby number one....oh and often toddler DS drives me to the wine so 🤷‍♀️😳😂

@SmileyT I couldn't find any early response tests anywhere only poundage cheapies and they are negative except 2 stick ones which are extreme squinters. I ordered frer last night and they will be here today so fingers crossed.

The lady in the shop said there's been so many people buying tests lol at one point she had 3 in a row at the checkout 🤣🤣

@minster2012 haha yeah well drug addicts, alcoholics and morbidly obese people have babies all the time - doesn't mean we can't try to speed up the process :) Besides - my post said alcohol was fine so do carry on drinking!

I'm just finding the research fascinating - tbh a lot of is just reinforcing why we're all here rattling with omega 3s (btw it says to get our men on it too as it improves sperm), vit bs and ds - that's kinda what the diet bit of the book would have you naturally up anyway.

@Minster2012 @Skip86 my OH treated us to a Tomohawk steak recently... Massive piece of cow it was. I seasoned it all beautifully, then trusted him to cook it on the BBQ. Never again. He killed it! Brown all the way through, not even a hint of pink 🙄

Will I have to amend my steak eating habits if I get preggerz?!

@notyetamumbuttrying Lol haha I’m like I want to clean up. Ok il try that - no legs in the air. Lay for 10 mins and clean up! Thank you :)

@LV1987 oh no who wants to eat a well done steak!? Going for a chateaubriand in a couple of weeks. Medium please 😂

@LV1987 I feel your pain, yes if pregnant you are meant to eat them overcooked. my DH bought us a tomahawk for Valentine's Day, problem was we did our IVF transfer the week before on feb 7th & you are told to "act pregnant & follow NHS guidelines on eating /drinking etc" so I was like nooooooo however we did it a flash fry & then in oven so it was still melty but in theory all cooked through

@Juno231 totally. I don't think it makes a massive difference as long as it not the extremes it's all about balance.

@CatherineTTC hilarious 🤣😂well not a lot else to do really is there but focus on things & lots of ppl postponing weddings and reevaluating like a few ppl here I think

@Skip86 medium rare, ok I can go with that if you let me off the tea thing 🤔

@akcheer @notyetamumbutrying same 😂 I'm up after five mins as cannot lay still and it all just falls out loooool

@akcheer I've been preg twice but mc both times and I think with both of them I never bothered to lay still for very long- I read somewhere that when your man finishes - the ejaculation has enough force forward to propel a good chunk of them to where they need to be and those ones get a good head start x

Morning! Did another couple of tests. I feel like there’s something there on the IC again. Did a 1 pound B&m test too but think that’s probably an evap?

@Noble89 how far along are you? Are you vomiting? If it just nausea and eating helps then the usual advice is to eat small and often. Stick to plain foods. Keep crackers by the bed for during the night/morning. Some people find seabands good. If it escalates get help.

@AKcheer

Hi guys this thread gives me jokes! A bit of wine some Oreos some vitamins and a bit of a$$ seems the way forward!! It’s really nice reading threads like this as helps me relax! My SIL has gone in to give birth today (we don’t get on - she hates me!!) but she’s only been married to my brother (he was adopted - who also hates me!) for a couple of years. I been married for 5 now but me and hubby have spent time enjoying our life going on hols etc - so I’m sure in the next day or so I’m going to get so much pressure ahh!

I have a question for you though - after you guys have DTD do you lie there with legs up - do you pee straight after and clean up? What should I be doing!? Please experts help me!! (I’m fairly new to the TTc journey - this month will be my 2nd month)

Thank you!!

My SIL gave birth last month and all eyes seem to be on us now too! 🙈 It doesn’t help that my brother and SIL seem to be incredibly fertile people - first child was conceived in the month after coming off the Pill and second child was conceived even though SIL had the implant in ☺️ They’re already talking about a 3rd so no doubt that will happen quickly for them too!

@lucyrp you just need to eat more of the Oreo chocolate! Get it on your shopping list! X

@notyetamumbuttrying that's the stuff woohoo get munching on that! X

@Mococo1 yep that is correct eat the Oreo choc 🤣 x

@KateColx I'm well jel of your dinner 🤤 x

@lucyrp it's happens to the best of us I'm heavier too right now boo :( it's also age too everyone is heavier post 20 and post 30 is even worse! X

@Noble89 nausea is quite common I wasn't sick much with ds but felt sick all the time! Not having that so Much this time more just exhausted and achey! Eating definitely helps I used to eat a lot of biscuits to keep it at bay and fruity sweets x

@mumof23188 I can see a faint line on the cheap pound one, how many DPO are you now?
Have you got any frer ones to test tomorrow with? I checked some pound tests yesterday and the sensitivity on those were like 25miu x

@Mococo1 Hahaha that’s what I’m worried about - it falling out. Plus il need a wee if I get up so will I wee it out 😂😂 I’m sorry to hear about your MC...not sure if you’ve got a little one now or whether you are trying - but good luck! You got this! Let’s just hope hubby’s sperm can swim fast because hubby can’t even bloody swim!!!

@Eloise27 Hahaha it’s hard isn’t it. Especially having pressure from other people. I swear people talk to me and stare at my stomach to see if it grows 😂 oh wow they must be super fertile. I guess we’ve just got to take time and think it will happen to us when the time is right!! The girl hasn’t even gave birth yet and I’ve had texts telling me to hurry up! The pressure is on!! I come from an Indian family so the pressure and expectations are so crazy and me and my husband don’t fit these expectations with our lifestyle so we’re constantly judged 😂 and people look at us like we’re not normal! I got married at 25 and 3 months later so many people were asking me why I ain’t pregnant yet. Me: “my career?? Holidays?? Partying” 😂 didn’t go down so well!!

I love coming onto these forums! Can chat openly whereas it’s hard to chat to friends and family about this openly! Thanks all :)

@Cocoblue22 I ate two bars and nothing happened so think I'm immune from the Oreo chocolate luck 😂x

@noble89, not sickness but heartburn for the last 3 months, go trick was to sleep on pillows like a reclining chair not flat, his wife and I were pregnant at the same time, she a few weeks ahead of me, so he was the most sympathetic go in the world

@LV1987 the guidelines in oz, and I assume UK would be similar, is to cook meat, eggs, fish right through, avoid deli meats, soft cheese and pre prepared food etc etc etc, buuuut... me being me I ignore it all 😬 I did my own research and decided the extremely low risk wasn't worth all the hoohah. I talked to my OB about it too and she said all around the world there are totally different recommendations for pregnant women, and she has had patients from say, Italy, who have never heard of the preg diet 'rules' and very happily and healthily eat salami and soft cheese all through pregnancy. I've decided to be Italian for these 9 months 😄 definitely personal preference though and whatever makes you feel comfortable!
Sorry didn't mean to go on 😜