Oreo 🍫 , 🍷 , puffy sex & BFPs by snaccident #dirtydozen

[SmileyT]

Have you seen our guide to getting pregnant?🤣

1. Lots of sex (every other day to catch) or SMEP or just Banging OH to death seems to work for some - For the same sex couples out there; Insemination using a cup (easily available on Amazon) Bum up after the goods are deposited... don’t leave it in the cup for ages before you put it in ✌🏾

1. Relaxing & lots of patience

1. Prenatal vitamins e.g Pregnacare, COQ10, Primrose oil, B6, B12, Calc Flour, Folic acid/Folate, Magnesium, Vit C (will have to do your research on amounts/when to take these)

1. Conceive plus/preseed - if you haven’t had enough assfruit juice and you aren’t moister than an 🦪 💦

1. Seed cycling - make sure you ground them up

1. Grapefruit juice (ass juice) for EWCM - CM should be stretchy sometimes hard to tell the difference between cum if you get loads of action.

7.OPKS/CB Digital ovulation kits 😂 A lot of us seem to like fermometer to record the OPK peaks

1. It will happen when it's meant to but not necessarily the month you want it to 😩

9.Wine, pizza, oreo choc and pouffe sex

10.Relax, dont be stressed, take bbt, dont take bbt, dont obsess, obsess, exercise, don't exercise too much, loose weight, don't loose too much weight, eat healthy, don't let it consume you and eat what you want apart from too much alcohol, caffeine, cigs obvs

11.PMS/ early pregnancy symptoms are the same and the progesterone likes to trick you.

And most of all it isn’t your fault, blame corona for all BFN

@Hopeful110 yes it’s there but I think it’s an evap? Looks a bit skinny? No haven’t got any FRER tested a few days ago and yesterday with them so used them up 🙈 I’m around 12dpo but that’s a guess, I’m just going by when I had EWCM! Yes I read that aswell. I wasn’t going to buy any but they were only a pound!

@mumof23188 you have got yourself into the early testing loop of testing and squinting haven't you. I can relate. Realistically you need a reliable sensitive test or the patience to wait a bit. It's sooooo hard though! I can't see anything on the ic but do see what you are seeing on the other. Why do you think evap? Was it not in the timeframe?

@AKcheer you're welcome 😉
@Mococo1 think I've read that too tbh. I only lay still on ov day but it's prob less than 5 mins in all honesty. Like you say, a lot of it's already out when they finish anyway isn't it.
@Cocoblue22 I saved half for today, I never save chocolate 😝
@mumof23188 hope it all works out for you!!
So on the theme of yesterday's bum sex, check this article out...🤣

www.iflscience.com/health-and-medicine/couple-attempting-to-get-pregnant-were-making-a-rather-vital-mistake-for-years/

@Katao oh my gosh yes I have and I need to stop 🙈 I’m going to stop from now and just wait and see. I think it’s because I got my BFP with my last baby at 13dpo and I’ve got so many “symptoms” this time round. Yes wasn’t in the time frame! Was around half an hour later!

Thanks @notyetamumbuttrying I need to get a grip 😩🤣

What the!!! How are people that silly? 😂😂😂😂

@mumof23188 no idea 😂
And don't worry about getting carried away with it all. We all know what it's like when you're desperate to be pregnant. It's why we're here isn't it 😏
Hopefully not too much longer to wait and you'll know either way!

@notyetamumbuttrying 😲 that is shocking. Wtf! Poor innocents 🙈😂
@mumof23188 completely understand, poas addict here. Sounds promising though 🤞

@notyetamumbuttrying I’m actually gobsmacked at that 🤣

Thank you! It’s so nice having you all here for that support ☺️

@Katao think I’m definitely a POAS addict now. It’s official 😳😂

@AKcheer, don't worry, as I'm sure you've guessed we have a no judgement rule here (except well done steaks and me hating tea 🤔🤣) & we can, and clearly do, talk about anything and everything. I have 5 sisters in law (well, 3 actual sisters in law 2 aren't married in) & only one not with children, ALL of the ones with children got pregnant v easily even the one with my brother who is 38 & was worried said "actually no it happened even quicker than we wanted, could have done with a bit more time to get used to it" the others literally "had sex once when the gunk stuff was there then once more for good luck" they openly say they don't have sex much so at just turned 30 last week she's already got a 15 month old & a month old now. Another has 2 kids also at 29 both took 2 months. Here's me married the eldest (we are 36) who got told my fertility was screwed from 10 years of cancer treatment from age 26 so we've had to go outside the box & challenge the system so have a DS carried by my best friend as a surrogate for us & an IVF attempt to me which ended in a medicated miscarriage. All of which we did in secret to avoid prying eyes. I've just been here for the support shagging & fun during lockdown whilst my body went mental after the miscarriage. & we actually TTC naturally. We are a very much unconventional bunch here 💕🥰😬😂

Eggs in the UK you can now eat runny when pg small mercies @Skip86 but the steak I was like "I can't eat nice steak for nine months arghhhhh 😥😭😭😢

@Notyetamumbuttrying OMG do you think that guy had watched too much porn & thought it was done like that??? Do they not have sex Ed there??

Oh @Skip86 I'm amazed you didn't realise it was about bum sex 🤣
I'm just pleased that dh is a bit of a prude in that way and has no interest in my bum hole! I did it once when I was 18 with this guy I really fancied, but I didn't realise he wants supposed to put it back in the vag after and I got a UTI then kidney infection a short while after 🙈 never again

@akcheer no little one yet but this bus is taking me on my journey! And couldn't think of going through it with any other ladies this is the best support group you will find ♥️♥️

@eloise @akcheer I feel you on the pressure front ever since my first MC everyone who knew has been eyeing up my stomach to see if a bump is there? Erm no it's just all that Oreo chocolate!

@akcheer I feel you on the Asian family front- I got married at 27 so I was already past my prime as my mum liked to put it! That + in laws seem to be banking on me only on giving them grandchildren as my SIL hasn't met anyone yet she's only 34 but you know how Asians roll it's ridiculous 😂

@cocoblue22 I'm a third of a bar down so today and tomorrow will be finishing my Oreo chocolate at DPO 7&8 to increase chances of implantation 😂😂🤣😂

@mumof23188 I think I see faint lines ☺️

@akcheer no little one yet but this bus is taking me on my journey! And couldn't think of going through it with any other ladies this is the best support group you will find ♥️♥️

@eloise @akcheer I feel you on the pressure front ever since my first MC everyone who knew has been eyeing up my stomach to see if a bump is there? Erm no it's just all that Oreo chocolate!

@akcheer I feel you on the Asian family front- I got married at 27 so I was already past my prime as my mum liked to put it! That + in laws seem to be banking on me only on giving them grandchildren as my SIL hasn't met anyone yet she's only 34 but you know how Asians roll it's ridiculous 😂

@cocoblue22 I'm a third of a bar down so today and tomorrow will be finishing my Oreo chocolate at DPO 7&8 to increase chances of implantation 😂😂🤣😂

@mumof23188 I think I see faint lines ☺️

Hi ladies 👋🏻 Firstly, I read through some of the earlier threads and they cheered me right up! Thank you for sending them @lucyrp
Has anyone tried the Ovusense monitor at all? I’ve tried OPK’s in the past and didn’t get on with them but ovusense looks really simple and easy? Any feedback would be awesome 😊

@mumof23188 I can see a line too! Maybe test again at 13DPO?

@SarahTTC2020 I've literally just spat my lunch out at that 😱😳no wonder never again🤔

@Minster2012 100% and I love it!! Oh wow. I feel you. It’s so easy for some people isn’t it and then when they say oh we could have done with more time. But you decided to have sex when you ovulate so you knew what you were in for if you’re blessed and extremely fertile! Oh wow you sound like you’ve been through a lot and I’m so sorry to hear about your MC and cancer. You sound so positive though, it’s so refreshing. And I get it you trying to do things away from everyone’s eyes - it’s natural. Here’s to hoping your body will get back to normal ASAP and to natural TTC! It’s crazy how you come on this and realise everyone goes through so many things but remain positive and support each other! Haha a bit of shagging fun - going to make hubby watch 365 days (if anyone has seen it) with me on Friday so here’s to some wildness! 😂

@Mococo1 awww that’s so sweet and the journey will take you to a little one! Hahaha Asians are crazy. I’m 30 - married for 5 years and people are like “r you ok”. Sorry if I wanted to travel the world and party in Miami, New York and LA and alcohol took over 😂 even from a career front I travel, hubby does it’s been hard but now we’re in a place where we’ve partied ourselves out and good career wise. In my head I want my future kids to have a good childhood where they live in a nice house good education and they get nice things and the only way to get them that is if me and hubby have got the money to do it. My parents struggled and seeing them is my driver but explaining to people you want to be financially stable when they see you as a baby machine is hard! Fingers crossed guys - 2020 has been an odd year it can only get better. Here’s to babies hopefully xx

@AKcheer made me giggle with your swimming comment!
@Minster2012 also dislike tea and love my steak rare
@Skip86 thats the attitude my sister had, and her girls are perfectly healthy. Its basically just to avoid food poisoning, which in todays day and age is very low if you are prepping the food yourself.
@SarahTTC2020 omg! thats horrible 😆 I have never had that issue myselg. Its funny, such a mix of us on here, like bum sex is a treat for us 😳 but I have never used a sex toy or watch porn, but I did enjoy 365 DNA. Ive tempted OH with buying some toys and he is straight up no
@Juno231 crap my lunch today is definitely giving me a sugar spike! Spent all morning out on a farm looking at cows.

@Katao I know 😂
@mumof23188 too funny right 😆
@Minster2012 fuck knows, madness right 🤣
@blodyn91 yum, what an epic lunch! 😋
And FYI porn is great if you get a category you like, try it 😏
@SarahTTC2020 oh dear! No wonder you didn't do it again!!

@clolo you might get more answers on this group as we're a 12 month crew (I've joined in anticipation of cycle 12 starting at the end of the month) TTC 12 months buddies please www.mumsnet.com/Talk/conception/3953373-TTC-12-months-buddies-please

Yas are all mental 😂 never seen a thread so crazy busy but also so funny. This definitely is the best bus to be on.
That much going on and cant remember who to tag 😂
Steaks, sorry I'm a well done kinda girl. If I see pink I cant eat it.
As for the bum sex and the link shared 😂😂😂 imagine.

Porn, it's been ages since we watched any but deffo dont knock it till u try it. Love a series or movie with sex. Turns me on something seriously 🙈

We havent told anyone we are tcc. Just my friend. Because I'm near 40 and the chances are lower I dont want beady eyes the whole time wondering. Couldn't be arsed with that.

The youngest grandchild in his family 7 so they just think everyone's done.
If it does happen they will all be shocked tho, even my side.

Have opks for this month. Any advice on when to start using. Got my bananas in and drink a small glass of ass juice which rotten
Dreaming of doing opks last night 🙈
We never switch off do we

Heyo everyone!! Arent you guys a damn fine bunch, I hope its okay I join in the fun!
I am currently 9dpo, have been trying for 6 months, althought only started OPK's and measuring bbt this month. Since then I've delved deep into here! Super anxious to test v soon, definitely raised my hopes way too much this month! From next month I am hitting up these oreos and ass juice!!

If you skip a few days its like reading a novel to catch up on here 😂

Hubbys gran passed away as we expected so all been pretty quiet on the baby making front here only managed once during FW but hey it only takes one little successful swimmer so im not totally ruling out this month!
While I was catching up this morn all the talk of oreos really made me want one, I dont fancy standing in a shop queue with a toddler waiting to get in, I didnt need enough shopping to justify a tesco delivery, went on amazon and boom single bar £1.50 getting delivered tonight result 😂😂😂

@Noble89 I had really bad morning sickness with my first and crackers ginger biscuits all the usual remedies just made me feel worse. Someone told me to try jellybabies and it really helped, kept a wee bag in my pocket and had one every half hour or hour and it helped to subside the nausea better than anything else I tried.

@Minster2012 you totally got my hopes up when I saw your post with the test before I read it 😢

@Skip86 I literally had no idea re: cured meats etc, they are some of my favourite things. As you say, a lot of it needs to be taken with a pinch of salt (but not too much salt, as that's bad for you too 😉). I don't know why I'm querying this, I've only just hit ovulation day 😂😂 I've also just googled my imaginary due date because I'm a crazy lady (5th April 2021, in case you're interested!!)

Okay lot to catch up on but here goes...

@AKcheer - im pretty sure the sperm get a super highway to where they need to get to and the rest is just goop so I only lie for a few minutes. I'd rather take a 2% drop in likelihood of getting knocked up right now than have a UTI anyways. I have done some post-sex contortions a few evenings but that was mostly just to amuse DH and avoid creating a wet patch that one of us had to sleep in.

@blodyn91 - is that a scone?! Bloody love a jam and cream scone.

@clolo - nhs scotland are running bloods for me as period is MIA (CD118) then said they will refer to gynaecology at day 180. Not sure what gynaecology will then say mind...

I've lost the post but I'm very very sad at the poster that told me to stop eating carbs. They are an important emotional support at this trying time.