Oreo 🍫 , 🍷 , puffy sex & BFPs by snaccident #dirtydozen

[SmileyT]

Have you seen our guide to getting pregnant?🤣

1. Lots of sex (every other day to catch) or SMEP or just Banging OH to death seems to work for some - For the same sex couples out there; Insemination using a cup (easily available on Amazon) Bum up after the goods are deposited... don’t leave it in the cup for ages before you put it in ✌🏾

1. Relaxing & lots of patience

1. Prenatal vitamins e.g Pregnacare, COQ10, Primrose oil, B6, B12, Calc Flour, Folic acid/Folate, Magnesium, Vit C (will have to do your research on amounts/when to take these)

1. Conceive plus/preseed - if you haven’t had enough assfruit juice and you aren’t moister than an 🦪 💦

1. Seed cycling - make sure you ground them up

1. Grapefruit juice (ass juice) for EWCM - CM should be stretchy sometimes hard to tell the difference between cum if you get loads of action.

7.OPKS/CB Digital ovulation kits 😂 A lot of us seem to like fermometer to record the OPK peaks

1. It will happen when it's meant to but not necessarily the month you want it to 😩

9.Wine, pizza, oreo choc and pouffe sex

10.Relax, dont be stressed, take bbt, dont take bbt, dont obsess, obsess, exercise, don't exercise too much, loose weight, don't loose too much weight, eat healthy, don't let it consume you and eat what you want apart from too much alcohol, caffeine, cigs obvs

11.PMS/ early pregnancy symptoms are the same and the progesterone likes to trick you.

And most of all it isn’t your fault, blame corona for all BFN

@Missgoldilocks always act boujee it's the best way to be 😎 and a lemon sponge with strawberry buttercream sound immense to be fair 🥰

@notyetamumbuttrying @LV1987 drink til your pink, it's a real thing 🥂

Morning ladies ☀️

Don't worry about the cake @Missgoldilocks I'm sure he will love it 💕

@Juno231 let's hope it means something will happen for you soon! 🤞🏼

@lucyrp ooh yay for something happening in your belly! I've got the slightest cramps today but I doubt that means anything.

@Minster2012 I love how you're always on the wine 🤣

Hope everyone else is ok ❤️

Just catching up ladies since I fell asleep at 8pm....

@lucyrp Chinese sounds nice! I had a curry.....and then fell asleep 🙈 x

@Missgoldilocks oh no what has happened to that cake? Has someone eaten some? Still looks yummy! X

@SarahTTC2020 those cakes sound lovely too 🤤 now I want cake x

@Juno231 are you using the same OPKs? Femometer ones for me were completely blank last cycle but easy@home showing 13%.

@SmileyT I got the Oreo bites in Lidl if that helps! Sure they are in plenty of places though.

@LV1987 Can't wait to start my pineapple, I haven't had one for ages so willing ovulation day to come along quickly now, sick of DTD and just want to chill and eat🍍🍫

We struggled through DTD last night, OH was getting extremely frustrated with struggles to 'perform' but we got there in the end. He's said he's finding it difficult with the pressure of planned sex and it's making sex feel like a job rather than enjoyable which I totally get because that was my fear. He understands it has to be planned to an extent but just added stress for us both. Just hope this month is successful because I can't deal with another month of tension/worry during FW when that's supposed to be the 'fun' time! Going to go one more time on Sunday as it's both of our days off so more flexible with time! Ovulation day still predicted for Monday although my static smiley OPK was Friday so I would think that would make Ovulation more Sunday than Monday?

Sorry for the ramble this morning just venting my worries so I can get on with my day 😂

@SmileyT phew cos I got pretty pissed last night lol! Went round a mates and so did my sister and we sat in her garden and had some lovely fresh prawns and salad. Oh and I drank a bottle of wine to myself 🥴 how are you this morning lovely? Up v early!

@Ltay2 mines struggled with that as well, I'm sure all of ours has. It is a lot of pressure for them and they start getting in their heads and pressure mounts. I stupidly told mine when I got my smiley and he was like right when do we need to do it, and when we did he took a while as clearly he was anxious. I don't know why I told him as I usually don't give the exact day so that I can counteract that from happening. Tough when you want them to know so that they can't flake off! 😆How long you been ttc now?

Morning ladies!

Sorry @missgoldilocks I didn't mean to be rude about the cake last night I'm sorry if it was rude I didn't mean that or any offence 😬😢slight disagreement with DH last night after a tough day yesterday.

@newbie0818 yeah this has been a glass of wine a night kind of a week 😂

@Ltay2 it's so good that you & OH have talked about it though & Sunday yeah I would say more likely & then it's good that you have more time to have fun with it too- why not a shower together or something fun like that?

@Minster2012 wellll OH will be gutted to here that, but blowjob or baby, think he'll choose the right one😂

So we didn't manage another session last night, OH was up for work at 6 so fell asleep early last night, but text me saying, and I quote he'll "throw a mix up me when he's home", how romantic😂 which is ideal really because we're out tonight and even though drunk sex is the best it'll probably be very late tonight/early hours Sunday morning so if we can get a session in during the day today then I'll be happy! Then drunk sex when we get home and hungover sex on Sunday!! Hopefully covering all my days for possible ovulation on Tuesday!

@Vil10 BRILLIANT!! Love that "throw a mix up up you!" Who says romance is dead!

@Vil10 BRILLIANT!! Love that "throw a mix up up you!" Who says romance is dead!

@notyetamumbuttrying Yeah that's the same as mine, he always asks me so that he's in the loop but I think knowing that I had a static smiley yesterday and after me explaining what that meant it probably put more pressure on. Plus he doesn't get home from work til late, works long hours and just wants to crash out when home so all of this on top of work stress clearly is doing him no good. But we're having a night off tonight so hopefully can relax and just enjoy each others company without added pressures.

@Ltay2 that's nice then. It's important to take time out to just enjoy being with each other and not the pressure of sex lingering. I hope you have a nice night 🙂
@Vil10 haha 🤣 amazing quote from your OH there! These men do make me laugh 😆
@Minster2012 morning lovely! How's you?

Happy Saturday lovelies ☺️ AF due for me tomorrow 😩 hope everyone is doing well. So much to catch up on!

@Minster2012 don't worry! Hah, once I saw it was sliding I thought fuck trying to make the buttercream look nice so it looks messy. But it tastes amazing and he loves it so that's the main thing

@Newbie0818 @SmileyT thanks girls 😍❤️💖 here's a fat slice photo

@blodyn91 same ones! Femometer again. I might get a low high two days before peak usually and it very quickly turns into peak so a bit surprised to see it on CD8 that's all. But as I've learnt this year - there's nothing normal or predictable about TTC 😂

Morning ladies, happy Saturday!

@notyetamumbuttrying I only had half a bottle... I've cut down quite a bit since the start of lockdown, and feel a bit tiddly after a glass these days 🙊

It's OHs first Saturday at work since March, so I'm at a loss as to what to do with myself today! My slob on the sofa with some Station 19 and crochet cos I'm a rockstar 😂

@LV1987 that's good then! I defo got carried away. The excitement of being out of my flat and in a garden 😂
Haha your Saturday sounds fab! I'm still being a lazy bum in bed at mo. Dh working today too but just from our living room lol so we'll swap round once I eventually get up!
@Missgoldilocks glad it tasted good and he liked it, that's the main thing! Well done for even baking, both my sisters are amazing at baking so I've never bothered lol!
@mumof23188 I hope she stays away tomorrow! 🤞🏾

@missgoldilocks I love buttercream, would literally eat a tub of it 😋🤣it's looks delicious

@mumof23188 are you waiting on AF or are you going to test? Any symptoms do you think?

@Notyetamumbuttrying thanks, I'm very meh tbh. Had not a great week personal wise & AF not really coming despite the tablets in fact completely disappeared now so still massively in limbo & DH & I disagreed a bit last night after i got good news on my scans yesterday then bad news family wise & he was just winding me up then said he didn't want to come near me whilst on AF after wine & I snapped a bit cos it's not like she's really appeared anyway 😫🙄

Urgh all very much meh

@Minster2012 he really does have a way with words!

@notyetamumbuttrying aren't they vile😂😂 I feel like after that comment it's going to be the quickest quickie ever😂

Thanks @notyetamumbuttrying your Friday night sounds like it was fun. Oh I am jealous that you are lounging in bed. That’s one thing I miss being able to do.

@Minster2012 I’m going to wait for AF! I have a few symptoms like nausea, heartburn and a bit of a fever but I’m not feeling hopeful and think it will arrive. Sorry to hear you’ve had a tough week 😩. How frustrating that AF is still a no show despite the tabs!! Glad you had good news from your scans tho ☺️. Ahh sorry you’ve also had bad news about family.

@Minster2012 ah sorry to hear hun! How is he with you today?
@Vil10 haha sometimes it's nice just getting it over and done with when you've been at it all week 😂
@mumof23188 yeah it is great to be fair lol! Every time I get sad over not being pregnant, I remember that I can at least lie in when I want 😂

@notyetamumbuttrying well that's definitely what we did just then, talked and laughed through it all about how this was the least romantic sex we've ever had, then OH hopped off and joked "that was the best shag of my life" 😂😂 very scheduled but at least we can laugh about it!
This is now me...

@Vil10 haha 🤣 amazing! And great legs by the way 👍🏾

@notyetamumbuttrying yes 😂😂 enjoy it whilst you can. That’s the only thing I miss. Lie ins 😂

@Vil10 😂😂😂

@Minster2012 sounds like these pills are messing with your hormones a little but and making you feel meh. Hopefully AF arrives properly so you can get on with everything

@Ltay2 @notyetamumbuttrying Sorry if ive tagged the wrong people. OH asks me what my OPK mean/ asks when high, but I give him a vague answer, he asked when fertile week was, I gave him a 2 week window, also spoke 2 cycles ago about how I wont tell him stuff out straight, if he does ask too much now I tell him that not the rules 😂 working so far, not had any tears this cycle or last.