TTC after a chemical pregnancy / early miscarriage

[Littlebee1990]

Hi everyone, on a few really supportive threads on here but thought I’d make another for anyone who may be in a similar position to me and we can support eachother... I’m petrified of trying again after last month tbh.

Last week I thought our dreams had finally come true when I got 3 BFP (including a digital!).. a week later I was bleeding and a call to the EPU confirmed it was a chemical pregnancy / early miscarriage.. so I’m back here and tomorrow will be CD1 cycle 4 (I know so many people have been trying so much longer) but just didn’t expect to be back so soon after getting a BFP.

So tomorrow marks CD5.. AF is due around 1st August and I promise to not POAS (apart from the one I need to pee on tomorrow to confirm the pregnancy is gone!) until 8th August if AF doesn’t show.. I can’t risk seeing a chemical and testing early again so have told myself never again will I test early.

Would love some buddies along the way with me 🤞🏼🌈❤️

Don't really know what to expect of my cycle now , will it just carry on as normal ?

If I hadn't have tested early , I would have just assumed it was my normal period. It only finished on Friday/Saturday.

I think next time I'll have to not test early, but easier said than done , I'm sure you guys know.

It's going to be difficult when/if it happens , I have to tell work as soon as I know because of the physical restraint in my job.

Congrats to you @Bouncytree

@123feraverto I’ve also said the same about early testing but agree it’s so hard! My cycles have really been messed up.. currently on CD31 and only 6DPO so it’ll be a 40 day cycle where as before it was 28-30!

Thanks everyone it’s strangely unexpected. Yes here hoping it’s a sticky bean! I’m going to Try not to worry about it too much.The last while has been too much torture. I’m just going to accept it as it is and out the past behind me.

And sorry to come along and just post, I hope it’s not hurtful for anyone.

I’m so sorry for what you all have gone through., it’s really painful but not in the way you might expect I think.

I found the cycle after the loss so confusing and I just desperately wanted to be pregnant again straight away. I was doing pregnancy and ovulation tests at the same time. My body signals were so mixed up. It was a tough month. In the end I was just happy to see AF and Just having my cycle Back was a relief.

This month I had got the hang of OPKs and DTD 2 days in a row just before ovulation. It was such a hard month before and with the phantom pregnancy symptoms, I just made myself ignore any Potential symptoms And not do any tests. It has really helped me feel in more of an even keel.

It ya only cycle 2 afteR the loss, so I hope it gives a little bit of hope.

Baby Dust to you all

So happy for you @Bouncytree and really sending sticky bean vibes your way.

Couldn’t relate more on the post CP cycle. Everything is all over the place, If I hadn’t tested early and known I was pregnant and then had the CP I would be so so confused with what was going on.. perhaps this is why some people have negative tests weeks after AF is due and then bleed, they could’ve had a CP and not known because it sure does mess the next cycle up.

@Bouncytree your story gives me hope! I hope you have a very healthy pregnancy 💖

I have a very faint BFP at CD25, I obviously caved and tested early. I’m so scared now it won’t stick. Does anybody have any ideas about what I could do to prevent miscarriage again? I also feel like there’s probably nothing I can do but I’m scared 😞 last month has taken all of the joy away and I’ve read so many horrendous stories of people having recurrent miscarriages.

Again I’m sorry if this makes anybody feel upset, I understand that at this stage I’m incredibly lucky to have the possibility of a BFP xxx

@SMB20 oh that’s amazing. And I totally feel your worry and pain with this.

The only thing you can do is not drink or smoke, which obviously you are not.

This is not on you. The last time there was nothing you did ‘wrong’ that made it happen. It wasn’t your fault. And this is not in your control either. It’s completely understandable to feel scared. But don’t put it on yourself to ‘ do’ something....that is more stress. And stress by the way doesn’t cause miscarriages either, so we won’t beat ourselves up over that too.

This is a battle of the mind. For you to be able to claim back this pregnancy and be able enjoy it. Not easy I know. But hopefully with a little time you can.

I did another pregnancy test this morning Then I got a fright because I wanted it to be darker than it was. I decided I’m not going to test anymore. I’m just going to not think about what happened and trust it will be ok. I feel like I could spend the whole time worrying and not enjoy my pregnancy. I don’t want to be robbed of that.

I’ve told myself the medical facts again that CP and early losses happen because of chromosomal abnormalities. This means that it just wasn’t ever going to turn into a life. So my body didn’t malfunction, there is nothing wrong with it and I didn’t do anything. I’ve told myself again it’s a normal, though cruel, part of the process of conceiving. Nothing abnormal is going on. My body is healthy it will carry and care for the baby. It knows what to do.

I know this is easier said than done. Sending kinda thoughts

Sorry i am obviously sending kind thoughts Rather than sending kinda thoughts 🤣

@Bouncytree thank you so much, I really have been blaming myself for the last miscarriage and punishing myself. Blaming it on my low self care or low iron or other reasons like work stress.

I think your approach is the best one. I feel the same already, if it progresses when will I let myself enjoy it?! I’m glad you mentioned that because I was going to test again in a few days!

Thank you for your kind words, they really have helped me xxx

@SMB20im so glad 😊.

There will be bumps in the road I’m sure. I had cramps a couple of days ago which is how my loss started, and it had me worried. But the more days that go by, the more assured I’m getting.

How is everyone doing with the TTC? @Littlebee1990 @MouseholeCat@ @123feraverto

@Bouncytree I love your way of thinking and really hope when I get a BFP again I feel the same!

I’m 8DPO and really trying to ignore symptoms but feeling very similar to last month (Itchy / burning nipples, thick creamy discharge, tasting blood in mouth) but I know it’s likely just hormones.. I really don’t think I’ll be as lucky to get My BFP the month after but I’ll keep hoping! Not going to get my hopes up though.. All I want is a BFP but seeing as the CP has taken me from 28 to 40 day cycles even if AF rocks up it’ll help regulate my cycles again I hope xx

@Bouncytree I had cramping last night and was convinced I would wake up with blood this morning but nothing. Feeling quite tired, bloated and nauseous, my boobs aren’t as sore today but I’m trying not to overthink it.

@Littlebee1990 I actually had very similar symptoms again this month. I read you have a good likelihood of a successful pregnancy within 3 months of a miscarriage. I think your signs sound positive! It’s hard I know as I have been convincing myself it won’t work out for us but this morning I reminded myself the likelihood of two miscarriages in a row is 1-2% (according to google!) I have everything crossed for you xxx

I’m 9dpo and pulling my hair out!! Only negatives so far 😞 I conceived straight after my mc and had a chemical so am hoping now I’ve left it 2 cycles that it’ll be ok as still in the fertile stages! Wishing everyone luck for this cycle..! X

@SMB20 I like those odds! Is this your first?

@Littlebee1990 hold tight! Oh the waiting, its agony. Yes as @smb20 says Research shows women are fertile in the 3 months after. But the messed up cycle is such a pain. I found the confusion really hard. I was doing pregnancy tests and opks at the same time 🤦‍♀️ I was just demented because I didn’t know what was going on inside my body. My hormones levels went low very quickly, but they were still high enough to reek havoc and honestly, I had the strongest ‘pregnancy‘ symptoms. I even had Cramps around implantation time. And my moods were all over the place. Anxious and really angry just before AF. But it was all the hormones from the last pregancy. I was trying not to think about it but my body was shouting at me! But I have to say when AF turned up it was a relief. The confusion was gone and glad just to be rid of those symptoms....worse than I ever had in pregnancy. I also just desperately wanted to be pregnant again straight away. But in a funny way the loss, and all the pain it brought, made me see things differently and I just decided it would happen over time. This Last month Has been so much better than the one directly after the loss. It does get better And you will get your BFP little bee!

@Bouncytree this will be my second, I am lucky to have a beautiful 2 year old girl. Will this be your first?

I have also found this month horrendous, I think having that positive and having it snatched away so quickly sent me into overdrive. I really have good positive vibes for everyone. It’s probably easy for me to currently say with a BFP but I was just so ready for this cycle to be over and move forwards xxx

Thank you all for the lovely advice ladies! I’m trying so hard to not test until AF is due on the 8th but I don’t think I’ll make it 🙈 Got my BFP at 10DPO before but I’m gonna wait a little longer for sure. Tomorrow will be 9DPO. I won’t test until mid week at the earliest which will be 2-3 day’s before AF... gah I said I wouldn’t test early again. FFS I HAVE NO SELF CONTROL.

@Littlebee1990 I was exactly the same! No self control! I think I got to 11DPO and tested even though I said I’d wait until 7 days after my period was due! For me my chemical wasn’t like a normal period so I would have known if I’d had another anyway (or at least guessed it). I have everything crossed for you 💖 your symptoms sound very positive!xxx

Please tell me I’m not going mad........ am hopeful and petrified at same time at the thought of another chemical or miscarriage 😩

@EDW1 That’s positive! Such good news, how many DPO are you? Xx

@Littlebee1990 thank you!! I’m 10dpo, I got 2 negatives yesterday, with my last pregnancy that ended in chemical mc I didn’t test positive til 14dpo, hoping this is a good sign but I’m so scared!!! I haven’t told my husband yet as am convincing myself I’ll bleed any day now 😞

@EDW1 congratulations this is wonderful! I know the feeling 😞 I am convinced this will be another chemical. My symptoms are already quite strong though (for my DD I had lots of morning sickness, exhaustion etc) so I’m hoping that’s a good sign. I got quite a strong line too at 11DPO just like yours 😊 let’s hope we all go on to have healthy babies. I will be able to relax more when I get to 5 weeks I think and then a lot more when and if I hit 12 weeks xxx

@SMB20 I only have sore boobs which is all I’ve had in all my pregnancies! How far along are you according to last period?! I’m also meant to get progesterone as soon as I get a positive but can’t imagine getting it on a Sunday! X

@EDW1 I will be 4 weeks tomorrow! How about you? I’ve had sore boobs on and off too (this was what alerted me I was pregnant with DD). Last time I wasn’t really looking out for it because DD was a surprise. Is this your first baby? Can you make an appointment first thing Monday for the progesterone?xxx

@SMB20 if the test is positive I’m 5 weeks today! I would imagine I’ll be able to get it tomorrow, just scared as I lost my last one 2 days after finding out so every hour feels like a week when it could potentially save my baby! I got diagnosed with pcos a month ago, weirdly am due to start my meds tomorrow too! Think I need to speak to hosp to know what to do now really. This would be my second living child... I have a beautiful 2 year old boy, 3 in November. You have a 2 year old too don’t you? X

Hello ladies,
I've just had a chemical pregnancy. I started bleeding Thursday and it's slowly stopping today. Is it safe to try again this month? It was our first month of trying after having my coil out last month, so I'm grateful it happened quickly but not to disheartened due to the fact it is the first time trying and knowing I've only just had my coil out. Has anyone tried so early after? Do I count this bleed as my period? Thanks for any advice 😀 X