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Advice for Women That Have Come off the Pill - Share your Experience :)

971 replies

MintGreenLife · 16/06/2020 09:51

Hi all,

I came off the pill two months ago, and after having a completely haywire 2nd post-pill cycle, I've been doing a lot of research to try and understand what's going on.

I thought it would be nice to share my research and what I believe is happening to me, in hope it might help others. I also thought you might like to share your experience and how you found/are finding coming off the pill, as being able to read that other people experience similar can be really comforting. So here's me...

I'm 31 and TTC DC1.
I came off the pill early April, had my withdrawal bleed a few days later, then first natural AF came 30 days later, so a 30 day cycle. First AF was very light and started and finished with brown spotting. Only lasted 4 days.

I'm now in cycle2 currently on CD37. I didn't ovulate until CD33! The day after ovulation, my boobs and nipples were agony. I'm now 3DPO and the pain is worse.

I recalled this pain the last cycle too, which I wasn't tracking. I assumed it was a sign AF was coming, as it arrived 5 days later. But from this cycle I now know it's actually a sign I've ovulated, so this would mean an extremely short luteal phase on that first cycle.

My research has included reading 'Taking Charge of your Fertility'.
I also found this article extremely helpful in understanding what goes on in your body when you stop the pill, as well as learning things you can do to take charge of your cycle again: avivaromm.com/post-pill-reset/

My sore boobs and possible short luteal phase points to an oestrogen dominance, which causes low progesterone.

This sums up why this happens:

'While not a symptom in itself, nutritional deficiencies can cause a host of symptoms – including hormonal imbalances. They are also a problem for women who come off the pill hoping to get pregnant right away because low nutrient status has been associated with fertility problems, and low nutrients in mom can also mean low nutrients in baby. The pill has been associated with robbing a number of nutrients including B vitamins and magnesium.

Hormonal birth control pills can deplete the body’s stores of certain nutrients, including vitamins B2, B6, and B12; vitamins C and E; magnesium, selenium, zinc, and folate. Vitamin D levels may also drop after coming off the pill.'

Understanding what is going on with my body right now has made me feel so much better. If I were to have a normal luteal phase this cycle, I'd be on track to have a 48 day cycle! The sore boobs tell me I'm probably going to have a short luteal phase though.

I've also learnt how hormones control the whole cycle. With oestrogen being the important hormone during the first half. It builds up and when it reaches a certain threshold it triggers the LH surge. Once you've ovulated, then progesterone kicks in. This cycle I had three LH surges in total spaced 12 days apart until I finally ovulated. Oestrogen and Progesterone have to be perfectly balanced, and so I think the three LH surges could indicate that my oestrogen kept building up over and over until my body finally managed to ovulate, causing an oestrogen dominance. I finally confirmed ovulation after three high temps.

As of a few days ago, I'm following some of the steps in the article I linked, by taking a prenatal multivitamin to replace depleted nutrients. I already take probiotics, vitamin D and folic acid, so will continue with those and will add in vitamin C too. I've cut out low fat dairy instead choosing full fat, and am trying to focus on eating at least 2 pieces of fruit a day and extra veg with my lunch and dinner. I may also look into including a b6 supplement for my luteal phase next cycle if it does turn out to be short again this cycle, as this helps with progesterone and during the luteal phase progesterone spikes to dry up cervical fluid, change the cervix position, stop anymore eggs from being released and build up the lining, so is really crucial.

Hopefully this will help someone :) would love to hear how others are finding coming off the pill x

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Flowerkm · 12/08/2020 21:44

@MintGreenLife Ah, you’re welcome, just thought it might help when you do yours. I Hah, i know right..would hate that pressure during this heat, it’s horrible.
Good luck with selling the house as well..loving the fact you painted the door before they came, good job it dried it quick but I hope they mentioned how good the door looked!! x

eternalflame2020 · 13/08/2020 06:58

Morning ladies. Had third slightly raised temperature today and femometer is saying I ovulated CD16. I'm not convinced as I don't have any of the symptoms I has last month. As it's only 2nd cycle, I'm not sure if I should get symptoms every month. Anyway, into the tww I go!

Oh my goodness @mintgreenlife we have dtd everyday for the last week as wasn't sure when I was going to ovulate. Yesterday was pretty interesting as our fan broke in the morning and it was roasting!

@flowerkm and @elsie2021 I also have no idea about EWCM and have googled it so many times. If anyone could see my internet history researching ttc I'd probably be committed Grin

Flowerkm · 13/08/2020 08:20

@eternalflame2020 Morning! Finally some rain :D
I can't advise lots on the symptoms as it's also my second month off the pill but I did have cramps and EWCM but it wasn't very much and a lot less than last month. I'm sure it will vary each month and if the temp is agreeing then should all be fine :)
Well done on DTD everyday, that's commitment, especially with the broken fan! We did manage to DTD yesterday unprotected, we're meant to be waiting until next month just to help with dates etc so been using condoms but we have the view if it happens it happens and then hopefully do it all properly next month when it's cooler! Wasn't the most romantic in this heat..

HA! omg, my history is something else as well. My OH went on my phone one day and i was like excuse the history... xx

Elsie2021 · 13/08/2020 08:27

@Flowerkm @eternalflame2020 that makes me feel better that you’re not sure about the EWCM thing either.

I thought it was just me!

Flowerkm · 13/08/2020 09:03

@Elsie2021 no not all!! I feel like Im on a learning curve! Xx

Juno231 · 13/08/2020 09:31

@Elsie2021 ever since I've been taking evening primrose oil I have noticeable EWCM every cycle - prior to that it was once in a blue moon and we actually used pre-seed as I was worried my desert hooha was getting in the way of things lol. EWCM is very distinguishable I think, as it's the only one that can stretch between my thumb and index finger by a couple of centimetres. I'm CD4 today :)

@TheDaydreamBelievers yay another cycle buddy! Hopefully you'll ovulate much MUCH sooner this time.

@MintGreenLife we're selling our property too! It's been an absolute nightmare. We actually got a buyer and we had an offer accepted on a house the week before lockdown and then it's all gone to pots. Buyers pulled out in June cause of Covid fears and our bank has been really difficult about giving us a mortgage for the house as they're being extra cautious atm so I think the seller is about to pull out on us too as it's not progressing fast enough. Not to mention we have no one willing to buy our flat atm cause the flat market is dead!

It's funny cause my OH was super keen on us buying a house as soon as we started TTC so that we'd have somewhere bigger for the baby - 8 months later and I'm still not pregnant so there wasn't as much of a rush as he initially thought lol!

MintGreenLife · 13/08/2020 10:02

@Flowerkm thanks :) haha, the 'brochure' for the house should be ready today, so will have to see if my speedy paint job looks alright! It was already painted in the same colour, it was just a bit scuffed so I whacked some on quickly in hope it would look a bit smarter.

@eternalflame2020 good job on DTD everyday! We tried that first cycle, but after I thought I was ovulating on three separate occasions kind of decided that was a bit much so stuck to every other day after that ha. I'm hoping this cycle might be a bit more straight forward, the plan is to DTD every other day, and then if it seems I'm clearly going to ovulate (I guess if I have a positive OPK & EWCM then might do it a few days in a row). What symptoms did you have last cycle? I've never felt ovulation, but I do get quite a lot of EWCM, which I would say is helpful, but not so much when I'm getting it for two weeks at a time! What I get is very clearly EWCM though, no doubt about it.

@Juno231 ah how funny! God that must be stressful. We sold our flat about two years ago to buy where we are now, and I was super stressed trying to push it all through. We are quite lucky really in that we can stay here and start a family in this house if things don't work out, we're moving because OH wants to bring up a family in the countryside instead of the city and near his family as we are several hours away from any family here. We'd like a little more space to grow into too, but we would be fine here another 5 years if we needed to stay. I think because of that I'm not going to push so hard to make it all happen this time, plus I've put OH in charge instead this time round. It made sense for me to sort it all last time as it was my flat and then we bought onwards together, whereas this is his house just as much as it's mine and he's the one wanting to move, so am going to take a step back this time around, plus I don't want the stress of it all as I swear I made myself ill last time!

Aww well at least even if you catch this cycle you will still have plenty of time. Are you still getting people in to view your place? Hopefully your seller will hang on, as otherwise if they pull out they will be starting right back at square one. Are you relocating, or just buying a bigger place in the same area?

It's horrible when you look at this year, I swear it's impacted near enough everyone and put plans on hold, which is really hard! I find 'standing still' quite tricky. As much as TTC can be stressful, it's been really helpful for me as has given me a way of feeling like we're moving forward even though we are mostly stuck in limbo waiting for life to get going again! xx

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Juno231 · 13/08/2020 10:08

@MintGreenLife ah that sounds lovely and I'd really like to live in the countryside! Unfortunately we are both bound to London job wise so a move to the country won't be on the cards for another 20 years I imagine! We're relocating as the area we live in is great but there are zero decent schools around so wouldn't want my kids growing up here from that perspective. The plan was to get a fixer upper and flip it within 5 years to make money towards a more medium term house. The one we've offered on is a 3 bed with space to add 2 more in the loft and to extend the kitchen out the back :)

Since the buyers pulled out like 6-7 weeks ago we've only managed to have 3 viewings of the flat and 2 of those weren't serious buyers. We're waiting to hear back from the 3rd as he was pretty positive about the flat and that viewing was only yesterday.

MintGreenLife · 13/08/2020 11:02

@Juno231 ahh that sounds awesome, really hope that it works out for you! We're in a three bed victorian terrace and we extended our kitchen last year (and moved the bathroom upstairs) so if you have any questions at all about the process feel free to ask! Going into the loft sounds awesome too, we didn't get quite as far here.

Oh will keep my fingers crossed for you on that recent viewing! We offered on a house we saw on the weekend yesterday, but no response yet. We phoned for an update today and apparently they have more viewings and are waiting to see if anything comes from them. Buying and selling houses is such a horrible game ha

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Flowerkm · 13/08/2020 11:27

@Juno231 @MintGreenLife sending you lots of luck with the house moves, all very exciting but so stressful! Really hoping offers are accepted and people put offers in for you :)

We brought our first home and moved in on March 20th and then went into lockdown on the 23rd so were soo lucky with it all. I made my OH go and buy all the flooring/paint to keep him busy 😂 xx

MintGreenLife · 13/08/2020 11:34

@Flowerkm oh gosh, that was a close call! Thank goodness you got in just before everything kicked off. Lockdown was helpful in a way as we had been putting off painting the floorboards in the house for months, but it finally forced us to do it to get ready to put it on the market. Saw you went for another one hit wonder yesterday ha, we haven't even started DTD this cycle yet as its too hot! Although I'm on CD5 anyway.

With AF, do you count the days you're spotting on your apps? As I said I had full flow first two days, light on day three, but I'm still spotting now (day 4 & 5) so have put AF as three days, but not sure if I should still class this as AF?! It's not enough to use a tampon, but is there every time I wipe, sorry if TMI!

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Flowerkm · 13/08/2020 11:50

@MintGreenLife so so close! Thats good you managed to get little jobs done, it was a good time to get things ticked off the to do list.

Haha! Yes we did..so random why we do that, we use protection all month then when Im ready he’s like, naaa lets go for it 😂

I didn’t get much spotting if Im honest.
Ive marked my period as 5 days but really it probably could have been 4..the last day was heavy spotting Id say rather than light as I still had to use something so went for 5.
If you’re not using a tampon, do you have to use a liner or is it so light you don’t need one? I think if you’re that light Id just mark it as spotting rather than a period. It sounds like you’ve marked it correctly :) x

MintGreenLife · 13/08/2020 11:55

@Flowerkm haha aww, it's kind of sweet he's excited about TTC and ends up wanting to DTD when you're fertile :)

Nah I don't even need a liner or anything, it's only there when I wipe. Hoping it stops soon so we can get on with this new cycle! x

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Flowerkm · 13/08/2020 12:07

@MintGreenLife aw i know. He still goes through phases of being scared but it was totally his choice yesterday so i feel he's ok with it. Just hope he's that keen when we get to TTC properly :)

Ah, in that case 3 days. Im sure it will stop soon, its so frustrating when its so minimal as you just want it to stop and get going! Any idea when you'll start your OPKs? Xx

Elsie2021 · 13/08/2020 13:30

@MintGreenLife my AF was similar to yours. First two days were normal flow, 3 days was light and then day 4 and 5 I wasn’t using anything but every time I wiped there was still something.

I just marked us as 3 days though.

mrsmacmc · 13/08/2020 14:33

Hope I can pull up a chair here. We've been TTC 4th month now after coming off pill which I've been on since 15 - now 34. Hubby is 38. I've been using OPK dip sticks and the results have been faint never bright purple. To throw into the mix I don't have family history for me as I'm adopted so don't have a frame of reference, I know I was a 'roll in the hay' then concealed pregnancy. Bio mum has since gone onto have 3 other children (did a bit of research a few years back about potentially making contact but would like to avoid this for now as don't want to upset mum). Any hints or tips - trying to learn what 'normal' cycle and AF is for me as didn't pay much attention when 15! Started the pill then as periods were very heavy and I did a great Jekyll and Hyde impression both of which haven't resurfaced (yet!). Tracking cycle on app and length is the same with periods no where near as heavy but horrible cramps. Sprinkling baby dust to all who want it.

Flowerkm · 13/08/2020 21:16

Hey! @mrsmacmc of course, come and join ☺️
With the OPKs, is there a chance you missed your peak? Mine come quite quick so end up testing a few times a day to catch them.
Ah bless you, I understand why you wouldn’t want to contact her yet, that must be difficult trying to do the best thing without upsetting anyone. Make sure you do what makes you happy 🌸
Ive only been off the pill a couple of months but so far my cycle seems ok..but keep going with the OPKs, would you consider temping? I haven’t started yet but a few of the girls on here do and it does seem very good :) how long are your cycles? Xx

mrsmacmc · 13/08/2020 22:02

@Flowerkm thank you for letting me pull up a chair. The past 2 months I've been OPK'ing since day 4 and tracking on app. AF lasts 5 days. Cycle has been 24/25 days, will try upping OPK been doing it at 1530 daily as working from home just now. Didn't realise that I could OPK test more than daily. Haven't tried temping yet willing to try though once I've read more about it. Nookie every 2 days with DH throughout the month. Trying not to become a crazy TTC lady Blush
Is it weird that TTC is feeling quite a lonely time, mum had the menopause at 19 anytime I try to broach TTC with her it's a bit prickly. Sorry I'm still getting to grips with the acronyms! Thank you Daffodil

Flowerkm · 14/08/2020 08:25

@mrsmacmc My cycle's also fairly short, saying only had one proper cycle and it was 24 days, i seemed to have ovulated on CD14 this cycle so sort of expecting a 25 day cycle, i hope it's a little longer so I'm giving a good luteal phase but we shall see as long as it's the minimum 10 days then I should be ok :)
I test around 10am and if i see a start of a dark line which i now know to be around (Cycle Day) CD12/13 i will test in the evening too to try and catch the peak, although it's now the second time I've got it in the morning. I test on the strips from Amazon, the Femometer one's so can use those as many times as you like really and their fairly cheap compared to the clear blue ones.

That's plenty of times, they say every other day is fine and you don't want to stress yourself out, that's a lovely approach and my OH is the same, he's very much track ovulation and up doing the deed (DTD) a bit more but if we don't then we'll wait for next month, i don't want to put pressure on him as he's mentioned that before.

Aw, I'm sorry you feel lonely, that's really lovely of you to think about your Mum and tread carefully, you always have here to talk about anything and we'll offer our advice and keep you company on this journey :D xx

Juno231 · 14/08/2020 09:17

@mrsmacmc it depends on the OPKs you use - if it's the cheap internet sticks then those you're supposed to up testing to like 3 times a day once the line starts getting a little bit darker. The surge can be as short as 4 hours so can be easily missed otherwise. I'd recommend tracking your BBT though if you have yet to detect ovulation in the last 4 months! That should help confirm that you ovulated.

Elsie2021 · 14/08/2020 09:34

Morning everyone 🙂 CD12 today so starting to keep my eye out for any signs that ovulation is coming! Although I didn’t ovulate till like CD30 last time so not actually expecting it to be soon but still hoping for a normal cycle!

mrsmacmc · 14/08/2020 10:31

Morning @Juno231 , thank you - yes they are internet cheapies didn't realise it was 3x day for them! The line has appeared but it's not been as strong as the test line so something is happening

@Flowerkm DH is totally on board with TTC and we are trying our best to go with the flow! Lonely as feel friends who have had LO's seem to have been BOOM we are pregnant.

It's a strange time!x

Juno231 · 14/08/2020 10:58

@mrsmacmc I use femometer to log the sticks with btw - find it a life saver in terms of tracking it and being able to go back to pics in case I think I may have missed the peak etc. All my friends got pregnant pretty much first go so I know what you mean - I'll definitely have to rely heavily on making NCT friends as there's no one I know that would have babies around the same time as me :(

@Elsie2021 fingers crossed your FW starts sooner rather than later!

Elsie2021 · 15/08/2020 09:29

CD13 today. I don’t know think ovulation is on its way. I’ve been checking my CM but I’m pretty dry most of the time. If I go looking for it then I have actually got some EWCM that does stretch about an itch. But only very little. Hopefully over the next few days.

How is everyone today? I’m looking forward to the weeekend off!

MintGreenLife · 15/08/2020 09:58

@Elsie2021 like you I didn't ovulate until so late last cycle, I think it was something like CD38-40ish 🤦🏻‍♀️ Here's hoping we both ovulate in a more timely manner ha. I too am looking forward to a relaxing weekend after a busy week getting the house ready. I've found I've got slightly distracted from TTC! I don't know if it's a good or a bad thing, as really want to give this month my all, but maybe not obsessing over it might actually help in a way 😂

How's everyone else getting on? I'm only CD7 now. Think I'll start doing OPKs again from tomorrow xx

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