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Penguin huddle 🐧🐧🐧 TTC after pregnancy loss - Thread 35 - time for some sticky BFP's

963 replies

SomeBunnyovertheRainbow · 19/05/2020 15:36

Welcome to the 🐧 huddle. This a safe place to give and receive support for everyone who has experienced the loss(es) of a pregnancy or baby. Pregnancy and child loss is one of the most difficult things we can experience and it can also be the most lonely time too. I hope you find this thread to be of some comfort.

I have found so much comfort from the lovely ladies on this thread and I’m hoping for lots of BFPs in coming months!

🐧🐧🐧🐧🐧🐧🐧

OP posts:
Thread gallery
63
Kiki275 · 15/10/2020 21:08

@EatPrayYoga I can only see it on the App under Watching. It's disappeared off I'm On x

EatPrayYoga · 15/10/2020 21:48

@Kiki275 I thought it was strange and wondered if it was just me as it hasn't happened before. How are you doing?

I have NC again BTW

I hope you are okay @Mumlili9 @VenusStarr

I was touched tonight by an old colleague texting me to say she was thinking of us and our DD tonight with a lit candle and a few people on Facebook have lit one

I didn't light one as it was 7:30 when I realised the time but I might light one when I go to bed

💙🕯💗

Kiki275 · 15/10/2020 22:00

@EatPrayYoga I think it's a glitchy app thing. I just check Watching now and I'm pretty sure nothing has dropped off. I'm good though, thank you for asking. Really busy getting our house refurbished and cracking on with looking forward/ planning ahead. I get very depressed when there's nothing on the horizon.

That's really lovely if your colleague. It's days like today that make you appreciate those who truly care x

VenusStarr · 15/10/2020 22:14

I was thinking of you all when I lit my candles tonight, we've all been through so much. Lots of love @EatPrayYoga @Mumlili9 @Kiki275 @kim80 @Marshmallow123 @Yellowbaby1 @Jaysdream7 💖💖💖

EatPrayYoga · 15/10/2020 22:21

@Kiki275 Yes it's good to have things planned. We have been doing some work on the house too and that has helped lift my mood.

It was lovely of her. We weren't very close when she worked with me but she's been very thoughtful more than once x

@VenusStarr 💗

Mumlili9 · 15/10/2020 22:28

Thanks ladies I couldn't bare to light my candle today, im already rock bottom and that just was to much. But i think about all nine of my babies everyday. Im sending you all love and support ❤

Internetaddictgirl · 16/10/2020 04:29

Hi ladies, hope I can join the thread. I was on a penguin thread a year and a half ago after a MMC at 9 weeks, which passed naturally but had some retained tissue, so I had to have a D&C.

Then my husband was ill and going through chemo, but now all better and the chemo is out of his system.

We've been TTC since April and I've sadly just had a chemical pregnancy. So we knew we were pregnant for a couple of days but lost it at week 5. I was really hopeful this time as had sore boobs which I thought was a good sign.

Any tips on things that can help prevent miscarriage? I remember last time the doctor said they won't do anything until the third miscarriage but has anyone had any investigations before the third?

All the best and sending you all lots of love and support

Marshmallow123 · 16/10/2020 07:02

Hi @Internetaddictgirl. Sorry you find yourself here and that you and your husband have been so much recently. I have to say that all the ladies here have been so supportive and lovely that they've made a rubbish time a bit better, it's good to know we're not alone in this. I don't have any tips but if you learn any please let us know! Xx

kim80 · 16/10/2020 07:10

What a thoughtful message @venusstarr ❤ its so nice to know that there are people who fully understand how we all feel and can support one another through these times. Thank you

Kiki275 · 16/10/2020 07:19

@Internetaddictgirl I'm sorry to hear you've had a really bad few years. I've not experienced MC so have no advice. That said I don't think there is anything you can do to prevent it and please don't think that it's in any way your fault because you didn't do something xx

Internetaddictgirl · 16/10/2020 15:25

Thanks @Marshmallow123 and @Kiki275
I’ve heard that some people take progesterone shots to help the baby stay in (I think of you go through ivf they do this). I’ve also heard that some people take low dose aspirin and / or warfarin to help stop clotting but I guess that depends on your issues.

Kiki275 · 16/10/2020 18:09

@Internetaddictgirl ahhh okay, I see what you mean. I took aspirin for my twin pregnancy but also had many bleeds. Progesterone makes sense, maybe discuss it will your GP? It might be something that they can advise on without referral x

VenusStarr · 17/10/2020 11:21

I'm so sorry you're feeling so low @Mumlili9 ❤️ I don't think there is anything I can say to help, but I'm here to listen. Sending you a big hug xx

Welcome @Internetaddictgirl, I'm sorry for your losses and your husband's illness. I'd chat to your GP - I was lucky that I was referred to a recurrent miscarriage clinic after 2 losses. Sadly I still don't have a reason (no sticky blood etc). I have since had 2 more losses. I tried progesterone with my most recent and sadly I still bled. Aspirin has not been recommended for me yet (although I suspect it might be suggested longer term). My GP was reluctant to prescribe the progesterone despite a consultant letter and I sent them the Tommy's research, I got there in the end though. Hopefully your GP is a bit more understanding.

My update is that we've booked to see Dr Shehata down in Surrey, he runs lots off immune tests. I just don't feel I can risk ttc without doing more tests now, it feels like we're playing Russian roulette. Tommy's have told me just just keep trying and hopefully we'll get there but I don't know how many more times I can do this. This last loss nearly broke me. It's too much of a coincidence to me that my babies don't grow beyond 6 weeks and my body doesn't recognise it. Even if my tests on the baby come back with a genetic issue, the statistical likelihood that my others were chromosinally abnormal is really small and both Tommy's and the nk cells cobsuisaud they believe my babies were genetically normal 💔 So we're throwing money at it now. I was surprised my dh went with it, but this last loss has really impacted on him too. The doctor we're seeing focuses on pre-conception and puts a plan on place dependent on my test results. So by mid-November I should have an idea of what we can try.

Did anyone watch Miscarriage - our story on channel 5 this week? I had to tape it as it was too raw on Thursday. I cried all the way through but its definitely worth a watch if you can.

I hope you're all doing OK @EatPrayYoga @kim80 @Kiki275 @Marshmallow123 xx 💖

Marshmallow123 · 17/10/2020 15:34

@VenusStarr I hope that your new doctor can shed some light on things for you.

This week was a tough one for me with the wave of light. It was also my best friend’s due date...I’m super happy for her but it’s so hard for me to see at the same time. Also found out another friend is expecting and is due when I would have been.

Hope you’re all keeping well and managing to stay positive.

Xxx

kim80 · 18/10/2020 09:48

Hi all,

I so hope @VenusStarr you get the answers you need from the new doctor and this helps you understand more why this has been happening.

I am still trying to work out how to work these opk's and where I am after the ordeal I went through. I have no idea what I'm really doing if I'm honest. Was wondering if anyone could help I got this reading yesterday its the strongest one yet so does that mean I am on my way to ovulate now or could it be like this normal 🙈 my partner thinks I'm sex mad at the moment as trying to keep it going as not sure where I am in my cycle maybe it will be easier next month once I've had my AF lol.

Penguin huddle 🐧🐧🐧 TTC after pregnancy loss - Thread 35 - time for some sticky BFP's
VenusStarr · 18/10/2020 10:08

That's looking pretty good @kim80. I ovulate on the day of my positive (although last pregnancy I ovulated the next day). When I get a positive opk we dtd every day for 3 days. I'd say you're pretty close. I think the standard is you ovulate between 12-36 hours after a positive opk 🤞

I'm looking forward to seeing the doctor - I need to be careful not to think it'll all work out and he'll fix this but I feel confident that this is the right thing for us xx

kim80 · 18/10/2020 11:03

Thanks @VenusStarr I will test again today and see what it says I'm so confused as the app said it was low but looked better then any id had so maybe next few days will get stronger.

It may not fix it but it may give you some answers to questions that havent been answered. It also may give you some options to try to get you what you so deserve. I only see it as any little thing you get from this is moving forward on what you knew before. I so wish you good luck 😊

Kiki275 · 18/10/2020 11:32

@kim80 have you downloaded the PreMom app? It should help make sense of them x

kim80 · 18/10/2020 12:55

@Kiki275 thanks for this I have now downloaded it but trying to set it up is not easy as I have no idea when my last period was and so I put the date of my 2nd erpc but now its running like I should be due AF in 5 days but opks are strongest they have been so far 🙈 think it may take a few months to get the app in my cycle lol.

Thanks for the reply though 😊 hope your OK

Kiki275 · 18/10/2020 21:42

@kim80 ahhh I see. This is my first month of using OPKs. My cycles haven't settled yet, so it's pretty much making things up for me. As soon as it recognised the peak though it seemed to make a decision. We'll just have to see if AF starts when it says x

kim80 · 19/10/2020 11:24

@Kiki275 they can be confusing lol. How have you found them? I got a high last night so hoping today maybe my peak going by what they say so hoping the next few days will get the time to DTD.

Its hard when you cycle's are not settled I'm hoping its not going to take to long to get a patten.

Fingers crossed yours settle and you gain the bfp you deserve 😊

Kiki275 · 20/10/2020 07:28

@kim80 I didn't find them too bad, although it wasn't quite the same steady rise as the example graph.
That said AF has arrived 5 days earlier than expected at 8 DPO. I'm beyond annoyed 😭 x

kim80 · 20/10/2020 10:03

@Kiki275 I also had my rise and it came flown last night but my peak also didn't look like the chart and only hit 0.91 as my peak. I will see how long I have between new and AF.

I feel your frustration so much as its so hard when your TTC knowing there is only a 2 day window to fall.

Well fingers crossed for a better reading for us both next month. 🤞

Kiki275 · 20/10/2020 11:08

@kim80 🤞🤞 x

Marshmallow123 · 24/10/2020 15:46

Hi ladies

How’s everyone?

So MMC with the medical management was just over a month ago...D&C as still had tissue remaining was 3 weeks ago yesterday.

After D&C I was lightly bleeding for a week and a bit, then had a week and a bit of no bleeding...now I have light bleeding again.

I am so confused. Do you think this could be AF as it’s a month since the initial medical management? Or has anyone else experienced a stop/start with bleeding that wasn’t AF?

I wish this whole situation wasn’t such a confusing mess!