Starting TTC again after missed miscarriage

[Smilingdonkey]

Hi,
Just ovulated for the first time after my missed miscarriage at 13 weeks (baby had stopped growing at 6-7) and wondered if anyone wanted to keep me company while we go through the ups and downs of ttc all over again! ! Xx

Morning all!

@RosieJess91 Thinking of you xx

@workingmama1 Takeaway sounds exciting, it’s so nice being able to order from your fave places, isn’t it?! What type of food did you go for? Be lovely to get out, too, have a nice day ☺️

I’ve just been for a run, got back and have almost like period type pains 🤔 I’m only on CD14 so I should hope it’s not my period. Maybe just one of those things 🤷🏻‍♀️

Morning all, at least I know for sure now, I definitely had a CP, wasn't ectopic, was a torn ligament in my side, never felt pain like it, honestly, it was worse than contractions. Still feel like I'm a bit all over the place on morphine, so pain is just achy this morning!
Just glad it wasn't anything serious, and now I know I'm not pregnant, can get back to TTC again.
Thanks everyone 💗

Glad you are ok @RosieJess91 that sounds awful though! Rest up and look after yourself!!

@RosieJess91 sorry you have been no such pain - but good to figure out and know what is going on I suppose

Another day another no pregnancy symptoms at all...have refused to buy more tests as I want to try to keep it kind of low key and if it sticks then amazing if it doesn’t well it was good news to fall pregnant again first time round after a miscarriage. But if I am honest it is hideous. I desperately want some symptoms and am trying to remember what I had last time but I can’t. Sorry to be a downer but I feel like it is inevitable this little bean has problems and I will miscarry. Am trying to get up and on with my day but I don’t know. Maybe I should get some tests and try to reassure myself

Glad you're okay, @RosieJess91, and hopefully you can get back to trying next cycle.

I took a pregnancy test yesterday because the EPU rang and wanted to check post-MVA (which was just over three weeks ago) and it was negative. I had to use a really expensive ClearBlue digital because it was the only one I had in the house, annoyingly.

My nipples are still really sore! No other symptoms but I think it would be too early anyway.

@SkyBlue20 we're getting a Greek platter, can't wait! I think CD 14 would be too early for period, could it be ovulation? We are nearly cucle buddies, I'm on CD 15 today.

@RosieJess91 sorry to hear it was a CP and you're in pain. Hopefully it will go away soon and you cam get back to ttc.

@Ranoutofgoodnames you're staying strong not testing! Remember that every pregnancy is different so even comparing this one to previous ones isn't always helpful. Are you planning on having an early scan or will you wait until your 12 week scan?

One of my friends just shared her 12 week scan photo with me to announce her pregnancy. It actually made me feel sick, my reaction took me by surprise, but it's the first friend since my MMC who has announced her pregnancy. I'm happy for her but it hurts to know we won't be going through this journey together...

@workingmama1 yes I know - and I had some symptoms last time and of course it didn’t mean anything (I do find this thought quite reassuring)

I am going to have a viability scan around seven weeks - with the doctor who is looking after me now. She is lovely but a real whirlwind - won’t let me down or depressed for a second - miscarriages are good because they mean an unhealthy egg has been let go and you are free to get pregnant again with a new egg that will likely be good!

Having just got over my chemical pregnancy stress I have moved seamlessly into a blighted ovum stress - 😡 google

As regards other people’s pregnancies I swear there are more celebrities pregnant at the moment than average all being like “ooh check me and my perfect chromosomes” 🙄😂😂

But good luck to everyone who is ovulating and dtd!!

Symptom spotters come sit with me quietly....

@SkyBlue20 hopefully for you it’s an ovulation pain! I did get my 2nd post MMC AF on CD18 so it may be a while before our cycles are normal but I’m crossing my fingers for you!

@Workingmama1 Greek platter sounds amazing right now!! Lucky you! I feel you on the pregnancy announcements, an ex colleague of mine just posted news of her 2nd on Facebook and I felt devastated. I hope for both of us it starts to get easier one day.

@ranoutofgoodnames no symptoms can still be fine! My mum had no symptoms with me til 10 weeks and I had no symptoms last time til 8 weeks (I know that didn’t work out but I saw a healthy heartbeat at 8 weeks too). Everything crossed for you and I’m going to use your drs positivity as mantras!

I’ve driven myself mad with OPKs this month, still very low results every day and no sign of ovulation. Have been trying SMEP so DTD every other day but I’m not sure how much longer I can keep that up before it feels too scheduled and all the fun is gone! I’m increasingly feeling like it’ll never happen for us now even though I know I’ve not really given things enough time (at all!)
Just having one of those days...

Urgh so I've started getting random pelvic pain again. Not sure if it's because we dtd doggy style and so deeper penetration irritating things? Or if i just get mid cycle pain as it's the same type of pain as I had last cycle when I was worried about an infection. Think I might try to ring the gp on Monday.

Awww @poppy10121 it will happen for you! I think it's just so tough after a loss as very day, week and month your not pregnant hits you harder. Gone are the days of wait and see!

Sorry your colleagues news hot you hard, ots so tough isn't it.

@workingmama1 your sex timing sounds ok to me! Got everything crossed! Hope you had a loved day!
@skyblue20 I often get period like pains around ovulation? Could it be that?
@rosiejess - I'm so sorry you had to go though all that - here if you need to chat xxx
@ranoutofgoodnames - it's still very early for symptoms but I can imagine the anxiety you must be having. There is no reason at all why this isn't going to work out but I know I would also be so worried. Try and relax. Is it worth booking in a private scan in a couple of weeks to out your mind at rest?
@poppy every other day is too tiring for us!!

Thanks @Workingmama1 seems like everyone’s been at it during lockdown as just got another pregnancy announcement from an friend! Did my best to be excited for them but burst into tears straight after :(

@Smilingdonkey it’s quite a lot, I thought it would only be for a week or so but no sign of ovulation so... might have to give up on that idea!

Good morning everyone!

@RosieJess91 I'm sorry you're going through this we are always here if you need to vent, chat, or for just some moral support!

I am now officially in the TWW, I am exhausted of DTD for four days in a row, a days break, the once again today. I said to my husband we need a break even though I felt like I tried some 'tricks' to keep it interesting it still felt a little calculated!

But I am officially going to symptom spot until I either get a BFN or BFP!

I do have to say doing yoga, meditating and doing the couch 2 5K has somewhat kept me calm, and zen and I don't feel too much pressure or stress, so I'm hoping that continues.

I hope you all have a great day today! I am off to B n M to buy some random crap I feel I may need 😂

@RosieJess91 so sorry, glad you're not feeling too bad now and you sound positive.

@Ranoutofgoodnames definitely stay away from Google! Glad you have a nice dr, and can have an early scan. I'm thinking if I get pregnant again I will see if I can have one, though they're not doing them at my hospital at the moment, so I'd have to go privately.

@Workingmama1 it's such a horrible feeling, isnt it, when you should be sharing the excitement, but you just can't. Big hugs. Sorry you've got pain again. Hope you get it sorted.

@Poppy10121 well done - we never manage to dtd that much! (Actually we haven't done it since before the mmc, so I'm a bit worried when we come to ttc next month we'll have problems.) Definitely too early to give up hope. What CD are you on?

@mrsAndeke fingers crossed for you! Hate the tww. When do you think you'll test? I can never wait the whole two weeks!

Feeling knackered, just finished week 1 of couch to 5k. Really want to shift this last bit of weight ready to ttc next month! I was down to 9st05, but this morning back to 9st2. Ideally I'd like to get to 8st7, but will be happy with under 9st! Find myself obsessed with weight loss and tracking my cycle ready for next month, and I'm a bit worried I'm building it all up and I'll end up with a bfn.

@Threnody I don't know, last time I found pregnant was just by accident as I felt the need to test and had a cheapie lying around! When do you normally start testing from?

Afternoon all!

@RosieJess91 I’m glad you got some answers and that it wasn’t ectopic, I’m so sorry about the chemical though 💕 Hope you’re feeling a bit better and are out of hospital, resting up.

@Ranoutofgoodnames I’m so sorry it’s so difficult, I can only imagine the anxiety. I hope some symptoms show up soon so help ease the worry a little bit but remember that even if they don’t, it doesn’t necessarily mean anything is wrong (easier said than done, I know) 💕

@Workingmama1 Hope you enjoyed your Greek! So sorry it was hard to see your friend’s news, it’s completely normal and it’s ok to be happy for her and sad for yourself. It is tough when you should have been going through it together, too. I saw someone announce their pregnancy on Insta yesterday, not even someone I know, more of an influencer, and it was like a kick in the teeth - I just felt irrationally jealous that she was pregnant and I should have been further on than her. I don’t even know her! It’s normal though, you’re mourning for what should have been. Just deal with it the best way for you, I’m sure your friend will understand.

My pain didn’t last very long and I think it was all over rather than one sided - I’d just finished quite a tough run though and was aching all over so it was quite hard to distinguish. If it was ovulation, that’s fine as we’d DTD the day before and two days before that so should be ok 🤞🏼 We shall see, I guess! My app thinks I’m at peak fertility today but again, taking it with a pinch of salt as it knows nothing for sure - will still DTD just in case though 😂

@mrsAndeke Ahhh the TWW, hope it’s a BFP at the end of it 🤞🏼 Enjoy B&M!

@Threnody Getting as healthy as you can is a great plan but don’t put too much pressure on yourself or overdo it - do what feels best for you.

Saw my BIL, his wife and our nephew yesterday for the first time since February (so before the MMC) and it was so lovely but I couldn’t help but sit there thinking ‘I should have been sitting here four months away from bringing another little member of the family in to the world’. Last time we saw them I was still pregnant and baby still had a heartbeat 😔 It’s ok though, our time will come - I just hope it’s soon!

What’s everyone up to today? We’re off to my dad’s for Father’s Day, to drop off some pressies and maybe have a glass of wine in the garden ☺️ Weather isn’t looking too friendly though!

@Threnody wow you’re so slim! My wedding weight (never achieved before!) or since was 9st 10 and I could only do it with an awful carb-free diet! I dread to think how much lockdown weight I’ve put on... I’ve been doing CouchTo5k as well, currently on week 7 but I think I just eat more when I get in from a run

I’m on CD14 in what is (was) normally a 25 day cycle so should have ovulated by now but no sign on the OPKs. I’ve got 5 OPKs left then gonna try not to buy anymore as it’s making me feel very anxious.

@poppy10121 @Threnody how have you found couch 2 5k? I've downloaded it but not managed to actually start it yet!

My weird pain is less today which is good. I ordered some OPKs as I thought it could be linked to ovulation so I could try to track it.

Feeling really hormonal today like PMT, just had a massive rant at my husband which I rarely do! Only CD17 so dont think it is PMT

@workingmama1 having been down a Google hole of “ovulation pain” a while back, it definitely is a thing! I wonder if we’re all more sensitive to every little thing since the MMC? I definitely didn’t notice all these ‘symptoms’ before that are driving me bananas now trying to figure out!
I really recommend couch to 5k, I was very “couch” at the start - the combination of lockdown and pregnancy tiredness meant I barely moved for weeks. Started running after the MMC as something to focus on that would benefit my health. I can now (just!) run for 25min and I find it really good for my mental health. I can almost feel the endorphins afterwards, definitely shakes me out of some of the darker moods.

@Threnody I try to live a fairly healthy lifestyle, although it's been difficult as I spent 7 months pregnant (and not doing much exercise then, only walks) out of the last 16 and the rest of it was recovering from MCs and TTC. I definitely put on some extra weight. I find a good exercise routine really helps with mental health post loss and with TTC. For me, it takes my mind off the pain of losing my babies and allows me to look forward and build my own strength. Also it takes my mind off tracking, temping and obsessing over getting pregnant again. It's far healthier to look at the Fitbit stats and get yourself in good shape than to focus on conceiving. From previous experience, TTC focus never worked for me and everyone I know said the same (annoying) thing, it works when you stop thinking about it. It's definitely true for me.

I think it's great you have a goal. I'm sure you look great now anyway, but having something positive to aim for will really help you now. xx

@mrsAndeke I have no patience, so always start testing from 8dpo. I had my earliest bfp at 9dpo, with my daughter, one of my sons I got one at 10dpo, and my other son, and the baby I lost at 12 dpo. I am completely addicted to poas though!

@Workingmama1 I quite like couch to 5k so far. I started out just walking everyday to try and get some exercise - usually I do none! It's tiring, and I'm definitely not fit at all, but I'm quite pleased with managing to do the first week, so I'd recommend it.

@Poppy10121 I'm really not slim! I'm pretty short (4'9), and my healthy range is from 6st7 to 8st4, my current bmi is 28. I really want to get my bmi well away from 30 - the midwife had told me I'd need to have daily fragmin injections from 20 weeks as my bmi was over 30, and I don't want to have to do that. The day I found out about my miscarriage I had a call from one of the midwives to arrange an appointment for the injections, and had to tell her what had happened.

Ah @Threnody I’m about a foot taller than you! My BMI is still the high end of OK though, could do with losing about half a stone. I found the quickest way was to cut out carbs and booze but they’re my only pleasures in this weird lockdown world right now! Once I’m back at work I’ll find salad eating much easier I’m sure!

@purplepansy05 I’m really sure you’re right and focusing on TTC is unhelpful but how can you stop it!?

@Poppy10121 I should lose a stone too. Work in progress!

Tbh, the only thing that works for me is keeping busy with other things. I try to organise my days quite well and concentrate on being healthy and calm. I've concluded that TTC thoughts make me anxious and as such, I avoid them and re-route my thoughts to something else. Of course it doesn't always work and TTC thoughts are always somewhere there (which clearly shows when I dip in and out of this thread!). I think whatever we do, it's important not to beat ourselves up too much, that's probably the worst thing to do now.

How are you doing? Xx

@Ranoutofgoodnames It’s understandable that you’re worried, but it’s likely that your MC was a one-off. You’re lucky in that you got to find out the cause. I’m rooting for you.

The problem is, symptoms or not, it doesn’t really tell you anything. I, for one, would be so relieved if I had no symptoms as I suffered both times. Last time when I was feeling like crap, I thought how great it was that I wouldn’t have to go through pregnancy symptoms ever again after this, but little did I know. If my body hadn’t been completely tricked and had MC normally, it would have saved me a lot of pointless suffering!

@Poppy10121 It sounds disheartening tracking ovulation and getting nothing. I believe you will get your BFP soon, we all will. Just have to give our bodies a few months to sort itself out first. It’s rubbish that MMCs mess up our bodies like this. For me, the concern is not whether I will get pregnant; it’s whether it will stick this time. We all deserve our rainbows, hopefully next year or the year after!?

@ew1990 MCDs is next now that it’s open lol. I usually eat fast food/takeaway once a week but since lockdown I’ve had it about 3 times in 3 months. Feels like I’m always cooking and chopping these days, so good thing it’s fun.

Guyssss, something interesting happened. I’m on CD 28 so AF is due any day now, but just now I felt like I was going to faint, I’m dizzy and my stomach hurt when I moved/sneezed. These were some of my pregnancy symptoms last time. I wasn’t ready this month due to using a new eczema cream, not to mention I’ve been using a nose spray for hay fever sometimes and haven’t been taking folic acid! I didn’t think I would ovulate so soon after the MMC and was only half TTC. I’m too scared to test and don’t want to see a confusing result. Might give it a few days. Oh boy!