Starting TTC again after missed miscarriage

[Smilingdonkey]

Hi,
Just ovulated for the first time after my missed miscarriage at 13 weeks (baby had stopped growing at 6-7) and wondered if anyone wanted to keep me company while we go through the ups and downs of ttc all over again! ! Xx

Your kids will have such a good age gap! I had to quickly get over the fact that mine won't be that close in age but that's what happens when I take my sweet time lol oh well. My mum mentioned to me that by the time I have another, DS will be a big boy...

@Threnody how old are your other DCs? I was planning to wait a bit for various reasons too and see how I felt once AF returned. Now it's here, I suppose I will take the 'whatever happens, happens' route? It didn’t take me long to get pregnant both times but I don’t want to pin my hopes on that. There's just so much uncertainty about this whole journey and offcourse the horrible possibility we will go through this MC nightmare again...

I have a feeling we will be seeing BFPs left, right and centre soon! Hoping you're the first @Workingmama1

@Sakura54 DS1 is 5, DD is 3 and DS2 is 19mths. Our baby would have been due September, so there would have been less than 2 years gaps, now there'll be a bigger gap, assuming we manage it at all. We have decided to wait until I have lost the half stone, just want to be healthy as possible, and get more vitamins in, but I feel so impatient!

I'm very aware of my age, and the what if another MC happens. To be honest I wasn't 100% sure about having #4 at the start (and feel guilty about that even though I know that can't have caused the MC), but now I desperately want one more.

Fingers crossed for bfps all round soon.

@AlisonLew15 sorry this week is a tough one. I think we will all feel like that when due dates come along

So I had a look at my fitbit this afternoon, check out my resting heart rate spike! First picture is when i was pregnat before and then now....

Though there is also the explanation that I've been sitting in the sun a fair bit so will be hot, and associated glasses of wine/G&T to enjoy in the sunshine! Until yesterday I thought there was no chance I would get pregnant first cycle so haven't moderated my drinking...

Ooh, @Workingmama1 that looks like a good sign!

Oooo @workingmama1 that's so exciting! When are you testing again? I've never thought about checking heartrate!

My period was intense but then seems to have tailed off to almost nothing this evening. Assuming it continues like this it will be one of the shortest I've ever had - but possibly the most painful in the lead up to/first day... Weird!

Looks promising, @Workingmama1! When will you test again? Fingers crossed you'll be our first BFP!

How's everyone doing today? I'm stillllll waiting for my period, absolutely no sign of it yet 😔 (I'm only just a bit past four weeks post-MVA so understand it's still early but I'm so impatient, I just want to get started again!) xx

Just got myself in to a Google hole of seeing how long miscarriages took to appear after MVAs, which led on to dating pregnancies if you haven't had a period before you get pregnant again (as not knowing exact dating is what's stopping me - I don't think I could cope with the uncertainty after all of this). I just want to try again - we found out we'd lost our baby on 26th March and it's now 1st June and it's still not over. That's half a year now taken up with this pregnancy. Just having a bit of a low morning I think - I knew I shouldn't have done all of that Googling but couldn't help myself...

@skyblue20 sorry you're not feeling great. I know you know this but it has only just been over four weeks so you don't need to worry about AF not returning yet, but i know how frustrating it must be for you, especially as this has been going on for ao long.

I tested this morning (but not FMU) and not even a squinter so don't think I'm pregnant? I remember that the boots test I used I had opened the packed before so not sure if that would have made a difference and made it faulty?

Thanks @workingmama1, I know you're right, I'm just feeling a bit low about it all today (and very impatient). I'm wondering if we should just go for it and what will be will be, don't think husband would want to though and not sure I do either. Might give it this week and see what's what. After so many weeks of longing to stop bleeding, I'm now longing to start again - typical!

Not too sure about the test being open but when I did a Boots test for my negative, the first test didn't work at all - no control line, nothing. Did you use a FRER today? Might be worth trying one of them, they seem pretty reliable? xx

@SkyBlue20 sorry you’re still waiting! Have you thought about doing ovulation tests while you wait for AF? That way you could theoretically get pregnant first cycle but at least you’d know the ovulation date...? That was my plan because I got impatient too but AF arrived on the same day the postman brought the ovulation test kit!

I need to step away from the tests! I convinced myself that Saturday's boots test was faulty after googling open tests, especially if they are exposed to heat or humidity (which it will be in a bathroom). Thought I'd try to close that door and took a test this morning with FMU on my tesco ones (only ones in the house, only +ve on day of missed period) and got a squinter again. So I'm confused! Thinking that either

1. left over hormones from miscarriage (over 5 weeks ago) and my pervious negative wasn't true
2. chemical pregnancy if hormone levels aren't rising

If it was a new viable pregnancy I think I should have had a stronger line by now. No other symptoms apart from heavier boobs which could also be a sign of AF and a rising RHR. Think if AF doesn't arrive I'll hold off testing until Thursday or Friday as if I am pregnant should have a nice strong line and if I only have a squinter might ring EPU/doctor.

Argh, @workingmama1, sounds stressful. I think your plan sounds good - see what the end of the week brings and go from there. I hope you get answers soon xx

@Poppy10121 That is a really good idea but husband really doesn't want to try until after my period as he also doesn't think he will be able to handle the stress of being unsure about dates. I think I'll see what's what by the end of the week - hopefully my period will arrive or at the very least I'll start to get symptoms that mean it's on the way!

How is everyone today? xx

I think you should definitely wait @SkyBlue20 Especially since you know it’ll be confusing and worrying if AF doesn’t show and also because you aren’t aware of your cycle length which might make things even more confusing? It’ll be here soon. I understand the frustration though. Same here in regards to time...6 months pointlessly wasted. That is a long time and all for nothing.

It’s been 8 days since I started bleeding but this has been exactly the same as my usual periods. I didn’t used to track my cycles so no idea how quickly they regulated after having DS so we will see next month!

@Workingmama1 I hope it’s not a chemical. Good idea to call GP and hopefully they’ll do a blood test.

Hi all!
@SkyBlue20 sorry you've been feeling low. That Google hole is awful - been there so many times recently. Not long to go now though - it's been such a long road for you but you've nearly made it xxxxx

@workingmama1 I'm crossing everything for you! Try not to go down the aforementioned Google hole! I spent 2 weeks down it

So my period was basically one day of very very heavy bleeding and now just occasion brown spotting. Really weird. I'm also STILL getting bloody positive tests! Madness! Does this mean it's not my period? I thought Hcg had to get to 0 to ovulate/menstruate but I guess not?! Dr's will call with blood results tomorrow anyway so I'll ask him.

Hope you're all well xxxxxu

Hi all - I just stumbled across this post when looking for miscarriage support. I found out I’d had a missed miscarriage on 7th May when I was 9.5 weeks, had MVA on 15th May. Those 8 days in between were grim, but it helped me deal with it & feel okay after the MVA, which was no where near as bad as I expected. I only bled lightly for 2 days after & no cramps (lucky). Today, 2 weeks 3 days after the MVA I had light cramp & light spotting, so was wondering if my period was on the way back, but reading this thread it seems to take a lot longer for most :( Was hoping we could try again in the next few weeks but looks like it could be a while longer yet! Sending you all love, strength & positive vibes, I’m sorry you’ve all gone through this too, but it feels good not to be alone xx

@smilingdonkey remind me how many weeks since MC are you? I think I saw somewhere you can ovulate when your HCG level is low but it doesn't have to be zero. I was still testing positive when I think I ovulated (but only going off EWCM and sex drive rather than OPKs so not 100% of i did ovulate).

@skyblue20 follow the debacle I'm having with tests and the discharge/pelvic pain, I'd definitely recommend waiting for a period if you can bear it, I'm feeling worse now as I'm really confused as to what is going on!

@SkyBlue20 that sounds really sensible, I’m super impatient myself!!

Trying to focus on my fitness instead with running and yoga and I’ve been taking my vitamins so fingers crossed will be off to a healthy start if/when we are able to conceive again.

Morning all!

Yes, @Sakura54, you're right, I should wait and I will - I'm just getting really impatient about it all.Trying to chill out though and I might start taking my folic acid again as they do recommend you start from as early as three months before you TTC. At least that way I'll feel like I'm doing SOMETHING!

@Smilingdonkey Hope you get some answers from the blood test results - let us know what they say xx

@Starfish762 Welcome and so sorry for your loss.Glad everything seemed to go as smoothly as it could. I'm not sure about how early your period can come back, though I think they usually say between 4 and 6 weeks post-MC.

@Workingmama1 How're you doing today?

@Poppy10121 Yes, I'm also trying to focus on my fitness and need to get started on a really healthy diet again in preparation - we've been mixed through lockdown as husband only wants to go to the supermarket once every 10 days or so as it's such an effort nowadays with all the queuing etc, so we start off really healthy and then start running out of food and just eat whatever is available, which is generally much less healthy!

How's everyone doing today? I see the sunshine has left us, annoyingly!

Hi all. Like Starfish I came across this post whilst looking for miscarriage support. I miscarried last week at 7+6 and feel like there's a huge hole. We are desperate to try again. I am still spotting a little but am already doing daily OPKs as I know you can conceive again as soon as two weeks after miscarriage. Will be trying SMEP as best as we can, anyway, as my husband works away most weekends. Good luck to you all. x

@Snausage sorry for your loss

Honestly today I'm feeling a bit down. I think it's a combination of feeling physically not great and mentally tired too. Dd decided last night she didn't want to go down, my husband took back over at 12, but she didn't go down till gone 1 and I couldn't get to sleep while I knew she was still up so I'm knackered, and am my nose is so stuffy from hayfever which has triggered a sinus headache. Husband has been doing interviews all morning so I've had dd on my own while trying to conduct video calls and keep her entertained which is exhusting, and I'm feeling rubbish about these half posotive tests. Convinced myself it's a chemical and wish I'd never done them now! So just feeling a bit sorry for myself today.

Welcome, @Snausage and so sorry for your loss. Look after yourself - it's a really difficult time xx

@Workingmama1 I'm so sorry to hear you're feeling so low. It's such a hard time for everyone as it is without all of the extra stress of looking after a little one (who won't sleep) whilst working full time, miscarriage, TTC and everything else all of this brings, too. The tiredness won't be helping - can your husband pick up parenting duties when he finishes work and you get a bath or have a nap or something? At the very least, get yourself a cuppa and a biscuit and put your feet up. Tomorrow is a new day, just a few more hours to get through, you can do this xxx

Another super faint line with FMU this morning. And my high RHR is starting to dip. Pretty sure the lines on the tests are not showing a viable pregnancy as they should have been stronger by now if it was. Most likely I'm thinking chemical, if it is I just want the bleeding to start so I can move on. Think it's unlikely to be still from the MMC as I had a scan after it and that was clear so shouldn't be any retained products causing a positive. Hate being in limbo! Was feeling positive when I woke up this morning and this has sent me crashing down 😪

Hello, currently miscarrying, was7+2 on Monday, spotting very lightly over the weekend but Monday the bleeding hit another level. Phoned drs, then epu then drs again.. now waiting for my body to finish doing what it needs too. After 2 days of intense cramps and bleeding, it tailed off yesterday eve but I have been in bed resting a few days so that could explain that.. I have to venture back into a bit of normality today as i have littlish ones who have been chilling on the bed with me ( which hasn't been too restful) and they are missing me being up and about with them.
My hope has taken a knock, I've had 2 chemicals and a m/c in the last 7 months which is more than I have had in the last 4.5 years of trying since my last m/c which was at 9 weeks but baby stopped growing at 5.. we had our in laws living with us at the time as they were moving back into the county and their house said had some hitches.. it was a very stressful time..
But I'm back on a barrage of vits, I'm trying to take some positive in the fact that I did manage to conceive.. sending love out to you all... xxx

@Workingmama1 I'm sorry you're feeling low and having to go through the emotions of not knowing what is going on with your pregnancy tests. I really hope you get some answers soon one way or another. The ups and downs of this process are incredibly challenging, one minute we can feel positive like we're able to move forwards, then something else sets us back and it does take its toll. Sending positive vibes.
@Chatbash72 I'm so sorry that's heartbreaking you've had to go through so much. Well done for coming out the other side and fingers crossed for the future for you.

I had my MVA 1 week ago now, initially no bleeding and only very light barely noticeable cramps for 3 days, thought that was it over and I could finally move forwards, and then suddenly started bleeding heavily on the 4th day with much worse cramps. No one had warned me about it suddenly starting days later like that and after everything that has happened over the past 3 months I panicked and called the EPU, they said it's really common as the uterus clamps down after the procedure and after it relaxes a few days later the bleeding and lining start coming away. I figure I might have built up a bit of lining having had nearly a week of no bleeding prior to the MVA and a positive OPK, but I'm on day 4 of bleeding now and it's still fairly heavy. Not heavy enough that they want to see me but heavy enough that its really getting me down. I work long hours with a very supportive team who know what has happened, but I have to smile all day and pretend I'm fine through all the other craziness going on in the world, when actually I am just so fed up of bleeding. It feels like such a long drawn out process, and I wondered if anyone else has experienced any reasonably heavy bleeding after an MVA and how long it might go on for? I know the only the 4th day and I need to be patient, but it feels like an eternity at the moment. The EPU had said it was normal for up to 2-3 weeks but indicated it should just be fairly light spotting which is definitely not what is happening. I'm just so desperate for normal cycles so we can start to look towards the future. Any help or advice would be greatly appreciated. Sending as many positive vibes as I can to you all.