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Conception

When's the best time to get pregnant? Use our interactive ovulation calculator to work out when you're most fertile and most likely to conceive.

Original poster

Fuck you TTC

483 replies

painintheholeSIL · 31/01/2020 07:45

Today should be day one of my period. No sign. We've been ttc dc2 since summer 2018. I don't have any tests in the house. I'm trying not to symptom spot, I haven't told anyone in real life that we're trying.
Our son is almost 4. I'm desperate to give him a sibling. I adore him. He's amazing.

But I am aching to have another baby. People keep asking when we're going to and we just laugh off the questions. They hurt. Every one of them hurts. I suppose I'm just looking for people who understand.

Every single thread I look at in relation to this ends up full of BFPs and I'm just not in the space where I can read those and not feel devastated.

So Fuck you to TTC.
Fuck you to months off slightly delayed periods
Fuck you to every fucker that asks me every time they see me if I have any news
Fuck you to the whole fucking lot of it.

Anyone care to add theirs?

OP posts:
Paininside30 · 09/02/2020 13:38

Fuck you negative pregnancy test month after month after month.
Fuck you people who tell me to relax and it will come.
Fuck you people who have had baby 2 and 3 whilst I am still struggling to achieve 2nd.

Urgh.

MummyBearBoo · 09/02/2020 13:57

@CorneliusBeefington -I didn't request mine to be removed either?

MummyBearBoo · 09/02/2020 14:01

I hate it coz I seem to get pregnancy like symptoms after ovulation (even tho it's too early) in my cycle they're hormone related so I never know either way! I feel like I'm definitely pregnant coz of my symptoms only for my AF come early on time!!

AdriannaP · 09/02/2020 14:09

@Paininside30 pretty much everyone who I knew from my first mat leave had baby 2 and some had baby 3. Me still nothing 😭😭

I now avoid some of them as I can’t deal with the questions/comments and seeing their babies.

Imsorryifioffendyou · 09/02/2020 14:24

@MummyBearBoo @CorneliusBeefington I'm sorry but I reported both of your deleted comments. I have found this thread so helpful and the pregnancy announcement and test photo absolutely floored me. It was so unexpected here. I'm so happy for you @MummyBearBoo but there are so many other threads for happy bfp stories and I cried myself to sleep last night after checking in here to vent and seeing that photo. I'm so sorry if that upsets you. I genuinely am.

MummyBearBoo · 09/02/2020 14:39

Ok I'm so sorry - I can't celebrate anything anyway til i get the 11 week test results if I even get that far - I've now lost two boys from these test results I wasn't trying to be insensitive I was trying to give hope!!
It took me a while to conceive the last little boy and being told after 11 weeks that he was too poorly to survive was devastating so I do understand the struggles and previously due to PCOS my periods stopped for 6 months so I couldn't even do this whole TTC thing!! I know it's heartbreaking when AF comes but I hated it more when AF didn't come but also I'd get a BFN as it turned out I wasn't even ovulating! Xx

imsorryifioffendyou · 09/02/2020 15:01

@MummyBearBoo how did you find out you weren't ovulating?
I hope you do get to celebrate. I'm very sorry for your losses too.

auslass · 09/02/2020 15:09

After three terrible miscarriages finally pregnant with our first after TTC for four years and a round of IVF. Mother in law just casually talks about MC's like it was a trip to Sainsbury's. Doesn't really give it any thought how much they hurt both physically and emotionally.

Father in law is already on about when we'll have the next one! Its a miracle I'm even pregnant now.

Screw them all. If there was a safe way to get drunk thats what I would be doing (obviously I would never!). Grin

Hang in there OP, I hope your dreams come true xx

Paininside30 · 09/02/2020 15:12

@09AdriannaP exactly the same here, everyone has gone on to more very easily where as we struggled with our first and is are struggling longer for another.

My brother "accidently" got pregnant beginning of last year and now I feel it's really hard to see them/talk to them or even be happy for them. The daily family group chat of pictures kills me 😑

PurpleDaisies · 09/02/2020 15:17

I wasn't trying to be insensitive I was trying to give hope!!

It is insensitive. Someone else getting pregnant is irrelevant to my situation. It doesn’t give me hope, it makes me feel awful and this really isn’t the thread for it.

I hope it works out for you.

MummyBearBoo · 09/02/2020 15:23

@imsorryifioffendyou - they did a blood test at two different points in my cycle plus I had no AF and they found cysts on my ovaries that they said would stop eggs from being released - also I'm sure the doctor said that progesterone is released after an egg and my levels were really low it's that that causes some of the adverse effects of PCOS they said it wasn't as obvious for me coz I had higher levels of oestrogen which compensated a bit!!
On my first loss it was difficult coz my due date would have been the day before my SIL was due with her second. - she went on to have a healthy baby and my pregnancy had to end at 12 weeks that was horrible I wanted to be happy for her but she talked about it all the time! Xx

CorneliusBeefington · 09/02/2020 16:39

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

MummyBearBoo · 09/02/2020 17:36

I know I was constantly plucking my chin and waxing my tash it settled down a bit after my periods started again though I now have a 5-6 weeks cycle so towards the end I'm plucking and waxing again!! I did mange to lose 2 stone last year as my distraction from TTC coz I was overweight on BMI coz the insulation resistances cause by PCOS can make it harder to lose weight so i pretty much had to cut out sugar, eat less and joined the gym!! Xx

MrsB2019x · 09/02/2020 17:42

Fuck AF who arrived 4 days late today.

Fuck having to go to work tomorrow (I work for social services - I’ll say no more)

Momniscient · 09/02/2020 17:48

I'm going to link to a very similar thread that's still going from last year (though with a heads up warning to readers there's a similar stick announcement rather near the end) and then scuttle awkwardly away again. Enjoy!

www.mumsnet.com/Talk/conception/3700399-A-whole-load-of-up-yours-to-ttc

MummyBearBoo · 09/02/2020 18:41

What I don't get is even when people who know what you've been through/ going through still asks questions like 'when will you have a second then'? I almost bled to death in my second TFMR the doctors didn't think I'd pull through coz they couldn't stop the bleeding -i made it in the end and even after that they still ask -you think they'd give you a break to grieve you've just lost your second baby in the same number of years and was too weak to even make myself a cuppa coz of the blood loss FFS! Xx

PurpleDaisies · 09/02/2020 19:43

What I don’t get is why people who are pregnant continue posting on a thread for people struggling to conceive.

Original poster
painintheholeSIL · 09/02/2020 19:50

@Momniscient I posted on that thread a lot and it died after the announcement.

@PurpleDaisies I know what you mean. I feel the same.

OP posts:
Lnix · 09/02/2020 19:50

@MummyBearBoo it sounds like you've been through a terrible time! Good luck!

Lnix · 09/02/2020 19:51

Fuuuuuuuck having to hold your wee in for longer than you'd like so you can pee on a stick!!!!

Original poster
painintheholeSIL · 09/02/2020 19:52

@MrsB2019x mine was 3 days late. Fuck it and fuck flo who tells me that the variation is normal. It's anything from 27-38 days.

OP posts:
MrsB2019x · 09/02/2020 20:15

Sorry to hear @painintheholeSIL, AF can be such a dick sometimes

MummyBearBoo · 09/02/2020 21:17

I wasn't pregnant when I first posted on here or didn't know I was and it appears that I'm not any more either so thanks lots -I just understood what to OP was talking about with everyone asking when they we're having number 2!!

Original poster
painintheholeSIL · 09/02/2020 23:42

@MummyBearBoo I'm sorry to read your last post.

OP posts:
MummyBearBoo · 10/02/2020 08:06

I understand chemical pregnancies this early are common - doc said to treat this like a period and test again in a week just to make sure 😢! Ovulation next month should be based on this being CD1 if bleeding continues!