Anyone TTC second baby?

[Lnix]

Hey! Just looking for some folks in a similar position to start a chat with.

I'm 34 and have been trying for a second child for 6 months. With my first, I didn't realise how lucky we were when we got pregnant in the first cycle with no real trying. I was 30 at the time. Our daughter has just turned 4.

This time, I tried the relaxed approach for a couple of months to start with and then resorted to opks and an app to give some guidance as to when would be a good time to try.

Anyway, after trying for 6 months with no joy, I'm beginning to feel a bit anxious. I can't stop wondering if there's a problem and can't stop googling!!

Please join if you're in a similar position and wanting to chat! X

@Merrz hi! Thanks for sharing that - I really did find it tough. You must have been going mad by the time you got to a year. Did you just keep on keeping on or did you get any tests at the time? I keep telling myself it's relatively early days but...I can't help worrying. Hope you get the case cracked more quickly this time. You deserve it!!

6 months felt like a bit of a milestone for me and i think that's when you start to worry something is wrong and its never going to happen.
I didn't have any tests, when af showed up on cycle 11 I booked a dr appointment for the day after af was due on cycle 12, they wouldn't see me until i had been ttc for a year. Strangely once i had that appointment booked it felt like the pressure was off a bit, like i was in control. So that month we decided just to forget about it, had made up my mind that something must be wrong so no point trying until we'd seen the dr and got tests. But low and behold af didn't show up on cycle 12 (although my cycles weren't bang on regular so didn't think much about it) but did a test the morning i had dr appointment and was positive, i honestly couldn't believe it. Went to the Dr appointment anyway and she was pretty unsympathetic to be honest, said its completely normal for a healthy couple to take up to a year to get pregnant.

@Merrz aw no way! That's so mad the way it happened!! Also reassuring to hear it's totally normal. I know you can Google statistics etc but Google will tell you anything! I know we have a child and therefore know it is possible. That really should be the ultimate reassurance but it is hard not to let your mind wander. Glad your year of trying ended well! Here's hoping patience pays this time as well! X

Hi ladies, nice to see some new faces. I'm out for this month, AF showed up 6 days late! I seem to have swinging long/short cycles - 22 days last month and 33 this month! Has anyone else had something like this? It was more like 28/32 days before my first was born...

So onwards and upwards to February... my LG is a November baby so if we conceive this month we could have 2 November babies!

Sorry AF showed up @Emelene :(

Positive OPK for me yesterday and negative today plus ovulation pains, so looks like I'm in the 2ww now! Anyone testing/due AF around 7th Feb?

@emelene sorry to hear AF showed up. My cycles are all over the place, 26 days one month and 33 days another month!

I'm waiting for AF think I will be out by tomorrow

Hello everyone. Hope it's ok if I join in. @Lnix thank you for starting the thread and I'm with you that after 6 months I do get worried as well and Googling like crazy! But here's hoping we will all get out BFP soon!!

Anyway! Here's a little stat about me:

• My DS is now 16mo. He was a lovely surprise so TTC is very new to me! And I'm a crazy witch during TWW. Anyone with me?
• We have been TTC since March 2019. I was still BF then though and only stopped early November 2019 and since then my period starting to seem "normal" as in regular and I have sore boobs (that seems to start after Static CB Digi. So I assume I'm ovulating?) then cramps during the period.
• I'm 30 and DH 31. But even though we are young I can't stop worrying if we have problem or not?

My confusion is can I say we have TTC since March? Or I can only count TTC since I stop BF? Who knows. I'd like to book GP Appointment soon I think just to ask what options we could get - I know they won't really listen as we have DS.

Whoops sorry ended up being a long post! Happy weekend everyone and here's hoping to those lovely BFPs soon!!! Xxx

Forgot to mention that I still haven't got rid all of thw baby weight. And my BMI is 27 (overweight!!) so maybe I should lose some weight and maaaaybe that will help us? Who knows but I will definitely try everything 😂

Btw has anyone tried preseed? DH is a bit sceptical about it and doesn't really want to use it but I'm curious if it can help!

Hi @emelene I'm exactly like that my period seems to be weird after birth - irregular and no PMS Symptoms. And then I came across Vitex (Agnus Cactus) and took it for 12 weeks and within 8 weeks taking it my period started being regular with typical pms symptoms especially sore boobs oh and I actually got positive OPK (29-30 days bang). I don't know if Vitex really helped but I hear it helps regulate period. Have you been TTC long? X

Hey @Mrssendy! I am in tww at the moment and yes it makes me mental! I feel really emotional (pms I think, as also crampy and sore boobs) and just generally peeved. If I were you I'd just count from when you started having unprotected sex. Keep it simple. Some people get pregnant while breast feeding so it is possible. I'm sure there isn't a problem as you had a baby so recently. But it is SO hard to be rational in the circumstances isn't it?! My friend just keeps saying "it'll happen eventually" (she is a GP and also ttc) and the more I've been on these forums the more I have to agree with her. Nevertheless...I am still emotional and feeling sorry for myself as AF approaches. Sometimes think my mind prepares me like this so if I get a bfn I've already done the sad bit! I never experienced all this the first time - it's character building stuff!! X

@Mrssendy - this cycle coming up will be our 3rd, so not trying for long yet. My little girl was conceived on our fifth cycle last time. But it's harder to find time (and energy) to have regular sex with a little one! 😂

Hey everyone, I'd love to join. I'm 30 with a 3yo DS. It took about 18 months the first time round and now I'm on cycle 5. My period is quite irregular, between 32-35 days. It's day 36 today but I had a BFN on an FRER yesterday so thinking that AF will be coming any day now. I don't track ovulation but maybe I should start.

@Mrssendy i am still breast feeding, my periods returned when dd was 10 months so i have been kind of assuming I've been ovulating again since then.

Hi everyone can I join this thread?

I'm 37 with a 4 year old (conceived 1st time trying) been TTC no2 for 3 years 😥
Had EMCS with no1 and had a lot of trauma & negative emotions after that. Had 3 months of acupuncture & energy healing 12 months ago which helped a lot with that but no baby.
Day 3 bloods all "normal" as well as thyroid & liver function. GP won't refer me for any further testing or consider clomid until DH has semen analysis. DH not entertaining this so here we are.

Starting reflexology this week. I have a short cycle (26 days) & ovulate late (CD19) so hoping this will help extend my luteal phase.

I think that's all the highlights.

I'm CD25, 6DPO, AF due next few days

@Lnix Ah we’re the same I’m in the TWW as well - AF is due next Tue and we will see. I don’t know why but I can just tell AF is coming. Why are we always act like crazy during TWW?! I have weaned my baby now, so hopefully TTC will be ‘easier’ - who knows. We tried SMEP this cycle and I wonder if we would be lucky. Oh I couldn’t agree more that it is almost impossible to stay and be rational. You know what I’ve been trying to think “it will happen eventually”, but I think it's the uncertainty that makes me nervous. But you are right if GP says so we have to believe it! At least keep it positive right? ;) I’m just really glad in this era we can find people in similar situation online because it really helps me! Are you still doing OPK now? I wonder what other tricks I can do or do I just relax about it? ha!

@Emelene I know right most nights it feel like oh can we just go to sleep. But we would feel horrible the next day and thinking “did we miss our chance this month?” I hope you will get your BFP soon!

@Merrz Hello! First of all well done for carrying breastfeeding above 6 months! I stopped BF last November. When I was still BF my period returned few weeks after my DS started solid and I find the period was different to before pregnancy it was so much lighter and I didn’t have any sore breasts or the usual cramp before period or during. And the CB Digi OPK always showed blank circle for the whole month! It was only the cycle after I completely stopped BF that the CB Digi OPK showed static smile and then I got sore breasts after what I assumed the ovulation day. So in my case I think my period return to normal as in I was actually ovulating after I completely stopped BF. Also I read on Kellymom that it is possible for some mums to have annovulatory cycle during BF. How do you find your period after birth? Any changes?

Hi @lostfrequencies - welcome! Tracking ovulation can be both helpful and a bit stressful. I'm lucky I get a predictably timed positive opk every month which is reassuring to a point but then I find it quite stressful as to why if it's all timed carefully I STILL don't get pregnant. 🙄@3isthemagic - welcome too! Hope the reflexology is helpful. I'm thinking of starting accupuncture to help with relaxation. As the months go by it gets more stressful. Can't imagine how you feel after 3 years trying. Hopefully you'll get lucky soon.
@Mrssendy I do opks every month but only leading up to and shortly after my surge. I don't do them all month long. I find them fiddly and annoying and mostly I just want to wee without a stick for a change! My period is due the middle of this week. I feel like AF could appear at any second. My boobs are sore, I have cramps, a bit of a headache etc. I've been like this since 7 dpo which is actually unusual. Was hoping it might be to do with implantation but it's just so so like my normal pms that I'm losing hope. Did a cheapie pregnancy test on Saturday (stupid, that was only 8 days dpo!!) and of course it was bfn. Feel like everyone around me is pregnant at the moment!!

@Mrssendy interesting about SMEP also. Thinking of doing that next month as even though I get positive opk I don't really know how long after that it is that I ovulate. Was also thinking of trying temping but think that would add massively to my stress so going to leave that for now. May try accupuncture. Few friends have recommended it xx

Hey guys. Looks like I'm out this month. Feeling pretty low tonight. Sigh. I like that this group is not a monthly bus though so we can keep chatting. How is everyone else doing? X

Sorry to hear that @Lnix
I'm 4dpo today, no symptoms to speak of but not expecting anything until at least 10dpo. When I was pregnant with DD I got a negative test at 10dpo but then my boobs were still really sore so did another at 12dpo which was positive. Thinking of testing around 11dpo this time!

Hi, can I join you please? I am 34, have a 3yr old DS and started ttc #2 this month. I am definitely more highly strung this time round. Conceived DS on cycle 4 and although I did use cheap ovulation sticks on cycle 4 first time (and never got a positive one yet still ended up pregnant 🤷) I am trying not to go down that route yet and just see how things go. Fitbit tells me when it thinks I'm ovulating but cycles are long and a bit random. Had what I thought was IB this month but looks like it was an early AF but annoyingly my head still keeps hoping it was more, especially as I didn't have a BFP with DS until I was 9 days late so I'm clutching at straws. Can't believe how obsessed with it all I've become this time. I think it's the pressure of wanting to get the second baby in an age gap of my choice, which is a very bad idea as it will happen when it happens.

@Lnix sorry af has showed up

@Mrssendy now you say that i wonder if i'm not ovulating then. I've only had 2 periods since they returned and i did think they seemed different. Just 1/2 days of really heavy rather then 5/6 days of fairly heavy and very bright/fresh blood rather than clots (sorry if tmi) also haven't had any cramps or anything

My sis-in-law has just announced she's pregnant, very happy for them but feels like here we f***g go again, as soon as i started ttc 1st time it felt like every other day someone was announcing they were pregnant which just makes you feel even more rubbish about it taking a while

hi everyone, it's been yonks since I've been on mumsnet so sorry if I'm not up to speed with the lingo/etiquette!

TTC number 2, just got my period today, so first month unsuccessful. Spoiled first time as conceived first time (with a different father). Daughter is going to be 4 in February and I have age-gap anxiety! I'm 37, partner is 30.

we had sex every day / every other day last cycle from day 8 until post-ovulation so not sure where it went wrong?! partner is already freaking out he is infertile because he has never had an accidental pregnancy.

my cycle is 26 days roughly, want to do BBT charting but scared I'll get obsessed!

@Lnix I’m so sorry that The Witch has showed up :( When will it be our turn right? And you are right that everyone around me is pregnant now! And in my case they either have “whoops” pregnancy or fell pregnant first cycle. Yep some people are just darn lucky! Anyway. Sorry for the negativity it just TTC is hard! I hope you’re doing well OP! My period suppose to arrive today, we’ll see I guess. Although I already feeling it’s happening - I’m having cramps and hot flash currently. Do you think you will try SMEP next cycle? SMEP is very tiring for me to the point I hate DTD! haha! When will you try accupuncture? If I’m still not pregnant by Spring I think I’m going to try it. Next cycle I will not do OPK or SMEP though I think I will just take the relax (well try to) approach and DTD when we want and we shall see - after 11 cycle I’m a bit fed up. x

@Merrz That is exactly the type of period I had! Have you tried doing OPK? Re people around us are now pregnant, oh my goodness that is exactly what happened to me too! SIL announced their unplanned 2nd pregnancy few months ago and hate it that she fell pregnant when their DD is only 9mo (I just really hope she won’t say that how nice it is to only have one baby!). And then 3 of my close friends have also just announced theirs. Two are unplanned, and the other one fall on the first cycle. Why people are so lucky? What did DH and I do wrong that even if we DTD at the right time we still haven’t fallen pregnant?? Why it seems so easy for other couples?! (sigh) anyway! I wish you luck and hope we will have our BFP soon!!!! x

How's everyone doing? AF is due next week but (Tmi alert) I've got a big chin spot which I've been getting in the run up to my period since I've been off the pill. So I don't think this is my month.

That's me out, on we go again...