One fucking year

[FthisS]

That's how long it's been now. I would happily never have sex again but I know by the middle of next week I will be singing the welsh national anthem in my head.

I get ya! I had to admit something to myself the other day....I am not happy for my friends with their lovely new babies. Seeing them physically hurts. :( So I know exactly how you feel OP xx

Hey ladies just read this, a good friend of mine was goi N through the menopause and was told at 25 she couldn’t have kids ... when she gave up at 35 years old she got pregnant and then went on to have a 2nd child at 38 years ( first baby fixed her issues and her periods were regular for the first time in her life )! Fingers crossed you all get your wish soon

@Maisy24 thank you ❤️ my husband is on all of those supplements 😂 he hates anything tomatoey so the lycopene tablets are needed! The doctor told us that one test doesn’t always mean there is a problem, they like to do 2 or 3 tests to confirm 3 months apart and they can be improved with diet changes etc. He’s reluctant to go back now though seen as it has worked that once 🙄

I had the blood tests and they came back clear too. The month we conceived was the only month I didn’t use any ovulation tests, I think I had given up by that point. Im also taking a few supplements (like coQ10) and have been for a few months so not sure if that’s helped or not. It does give me hope that it can happen! I just worry that we left it too late every month that passes! Will give it a couple of months and go back to the doctors 🤞🏻 Xx

A woman I know, who fell ‘accidentally’ with all three of her children, recently gave birth, allegedly not knowing she was pregnant.
I find it SO hard, people seem to get pregnant at the drop of a hat but it’s SO hard here.
I had a chemical in June, my friend is currently pregnant and due the same time I would have been, it hurts so badly 😭

@Maisy24 agnus castus is an ancient herbal fertility tincture - it's used in some pregnancy vitamins, sometimes called Vitex - I'll try and find a link

www.netdoctor.co.uk/medicines/a27329532/vitex-agnus-castus/

www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC5308513/

Struggling to read this properly so apologies if it's not a good article

@Maisy24 @FthisS

I had a mixture of feelings it felt great to share with someone but I also felt like I had stolen away the experience of announcing that we are pregnant one day... I think the pros outway the cons though. My parents live in UK and my partner and I live in NZ, they are coming out for 5 weeks in Jan and she said she will help me (even if just moral support) to push for some tests from the drs. Our local practice has a real issue with their drs, plus no NHS so each appointment costs me a fortune. So will be good to have some moral support and someone to talk to

@Laurab329 I've heard you need a few tests to get a true result. I wouldn't worry about leaving it too late, you are still young, plenty of time yet. I hope you get your BFP soon!

@Mooey89 it is very annoying and frustrating when you hear things like that 😭 it's just not fair.

@custardbear thank you! I might give that a go. I'm willing to try anything at this point, I think if someone said you can get pregnant but will have to lose an arm I'd happily go straight to b&q to buy a saw 🤣

@Yogahorseygirl I know what you mean about the announcement; I thought the same, but then again I think my mum would be even more shocked now! I think no matter what they know about trying it would be a shock, so don't worry. New Zealand wow! I've heard it's amazing there! Do you plan on staying there with the baby or coming back to the UK? I think it will do you the world of good to have your mum here in January for support.

@Maisy24 - good luck - you can search on MN about Agnus castus for more advice as it's been talked about a lot - do you know if your hormones are a bit wobbly?
I also found weight can help too, lose a little if you're a bit over or gain a little if you're a bit underweight - these hormones can fluctuate due to fat as some reside /change due to body fat - I'm a little overweight so lost a few kg, upped my exercise and both children i have now resulted ... possibly coincidence but fitness helped me withy while life to be honest! It's subtle changes that help though, not extreme as this can cause problems in itself

I've ordered the agnus castus, it's completely wrong we have to do all this jazz when heroin addicts just get pregnant. If 2020 isn't my year I'm getting --a reborn doll- several more cats.

@Maisy24
My partner is a Kiwi so we moved out here 3 years ago - it's tough but my parents are amazing and visit every year and we will try travel back every couple of years. I'm hoping that my parents might consider moving out one day once they have grandchildren
I might look into the agnus cactus too!
Although I might start rattling soon if I can any more supplements!

@Maisy24 that's what I think, it's over precautions, fuck it, I'm going to try anyway.

@custardbear I'm going to buy some Angus Cactus so thanks for that.

It's hard because I am happy for people having babies but it's tainted by my own wish to get pregnant.

I don't think it's OK to slag off heroin addicts for being able to get pregnant though @FthisS, they are often very traumatised vulnerable women. They deserve support not hatred. Personally, it's the women who neglect their children for no apparent reason that piss me off.

I think this I've given up. First month since starting that I've got to 11dpo without taking a test! Usually from around 8dpo I'm itching to test, rush around trying to sort my test before leaving for work. Where as today im working from home, still in my pyjamas and my first morning urine is long gone! And I'm subconsciously sticking up my middle finger at all my tests in the cupboard. I think I'm sounding a bit crazy 🤣

@custardbear thank you I will be ordering some. My hormones came back perfect! But I do get a lot of spotting so I did think progesterone was low but the test came back it was where it should be, and I also did acupuncture for a while and she said my charts showed my progesterone was good. So I don't know 😕 I'm a size 8-10 so I'm not too thin and not overweight but thanks for the advice, I am going to try eat a bit better.

@FthisS ha ha I'm with you on the cats! What cycle day are you on now? Will you get one more chance before Xmas?

@BewilderedBee I am totally with you on the not testing. I am WAY past the being too excited to test stage, i now just wait for AF as I've lost hope! Good on you for staying in your Pjs I'm very jealous!

@Whyhaveidonethis I would definitely keep on trying; it's not worth wasting a month.

This is a place of none judgement, in a world of ttc craziness, I don't think @FthisS was hating on heroin addicts, she was simply saying it's unfair that we do everything we can to be as healthy as possible so we can have a baby. Even if she was hating she is allowed to free of any judgement.

It is very unfair that people that abuse their body's with drugs can get pregnant so easily, your right they may have it hard but I completely disagree that it's fair. They can not give a child a good start in life, the poor child will be born addicted to drugs. I am with @FthisS on this one.

@Whyhaveidonethis the point of me starting this thread was so that I and others could complain and get it off our chests how we are really feeling. I don't intend to sugar coat anything. I have nobody in rl apart from H and I need to sometimes share all my thoughts no matter how irrational they may seem to anyone else. So yes it is bloody wrong that a heroin addict gets pregnant when here I am a non smoker, only drink water (yes only ever water) and bloody fucking healthy. If you don't like this that's fair enough but I stand by what I say and won't apologise.

@Maisy24 cd6 back on it tonight I guess...H isn't too keen on the idea of just doing it in a cup for me .

I haven't bought a single pregnancy test since ttc it's a good flippin job because I would have wasted hundreds.

@FthisS haha I bet he isn't. Keep positive and focused just to get through the fertile window! I'm on CD8 today so we are quite close although my cycles are 30-35 days so I won't be ovulating yet. I've got my clear blue opks ready to go from day 12. I'll do cheapies from today until then just incase. It would be lovely if we got BFPS before Christmas but it feels more likely brexit will happen 🤣

@Maisy24 maybe I should have put it to the folks over in aibu, I thought it was a fair ask but apparently not I really hate what sex has become though...another bloody chore but if I missed a month I would be in pieces.

Tonight is the start of this cycle’s scheduled sex. I absolutely hate that I think of it that way.

Last cycle was a chemical pregnancy. Possibly naive of me, but i assumed bleeding would still be like normal AF as I was less than a week late. I wasn’t ready for crippling agony and ended up in the school nurse’s office sobbing all over her.

I hate that ttc is making me a worse wife (see earlier comment on scheduled sex...) a worse mum (we have a 3yo DD, who I’ll hardly see today because I’ve stuck with my horrific commute so as to not lose my enhanced maternity pay) and now affecting my job as well. How can this one thing make every part of my life worse?

I’m all for voicing negative thoughts on here. It doesn’t feel fair some days, and bottling up those feelings will make them more likely to affect our behaviour. Everyone needs a decent whinge now and then, and this is something that it’s hard to whinge about in public.

@crazychemist we are scheduled sex sisters my marathon starts tonight accompanied by singing the welsh national anthem. It's times like this I wish H suffered from premature ejaculation. It takes forever and I've had it (see above my suggestion that he could do it in a cup).
I see no point in ever using contraception again I mean what's the point? Or is this when sods law comes into play arrggghhhh

Hi everyone. For those of you in your 30s ttc don't wait a year before seeing your GP. Time isn't on your side so just go and get yourself checked out sooner rather than later to minimise time wasting if there's a problem! Just fib and say you've been trying for a few months longer than you have. If there's no problem then that's great but if there is then it'll be actioned sooner rather than later. Good luck everyone!

Well me and DH are in bed and he rolled over and shouted ow what's that sticking in me, when we looked it was only a fertility vitamin in the bed🤣🤣🤣 THIS JUST SUMS US UP IN THE BEDROOM DEPARTMENT AT THE MINHTE! 🙈

@Maisy24 hahahaha we need moments like that to bring a bit of humour to these dark days.

How is it the 4th of December! I'm home schooling my daughter (9 and a half) until January so I'm seriously behind on wrapping.