TTC after pregnancy loss - Thread 33- huddle up and bring on the BFP's

[Mumlili8]

Welcome to the 🐧 huddle. This a safe place to get and give support for everyone who has experienced the loss(es) of a pregnancy and baby. Pregnancy and child loss is the most awful thing anyone can experience and it can also be the most lonely time too. I hope you find this thread to be of some comfort.

@Sunflower1608 Thank you for your kind words. I'm having brown discharge now and I'm quite scared. I'm not sure how to feel and what to expect. while trying to keep positive. Did you have similar experience and how did you deal with it? I don't know what to do, really. Good Luck to us.

And Congratulations to those who have received good news. Wish you all the best and God bless. x

@mrsmb03 I'm sorry you're going through so much worry. With my first I had spotting for quite a while, and it all turned out ok. My miscarriage I just had brown spotting which slowly peetered out. I convinced myself it was all fine and the EPU refused to scan me as I was so early. The advise I got was to retake a test in a couple of weeks. It may be worth calling them (sorry I can't remember how many weeks you were). They may be able to provide more help x

I tried OPK's this month for the first time. Ovulated 10days ago (ish).
I've had terrible wind (sorry tmi 🤣) and when I flomped on my partner's chest for a cuddle I noticed that my breasts were quite tender. Now I do have a tendancy to go in full blown symptom spotting mode. I have no frer in the house, but some on order from Amazon due in 2-4days. I am trying to avoid a trip to the pharmacy to buy one and just wait for the parcel, but I am the most impatient person I know. I have however peed on the opk the last couple days with FMU and got a strong positive but a negative in the afternoon. I have read they can detect HCG as they are a similar molecular make up. Driving myself a little crazy here

Thank you @Sunflower1608 I am having another scan this Friday. I am supposed to be around 11 weeks. I had my 12 week scan end of last week. I pray that the baby is alive and well and is still growing. I'm having some light brown discharge this past few weeks. So really anxious

Are you doing IVF treatments? What happened when you miscarried if you dont mind me asking.

Good luck to you. x

Btw, baby measured at 5.9 mm last week so was told about 6 weeks. Accdg. to pregnancy scan notes 'viable intrauterine pregnancy'

Hi all, sorry if some of you have answered this already in older posts but I was wondering when you first ovulated following miscarriage. When I google it says it can be as soon as two weeks after first day of miscarriage bleeding, or much longer. Just wondering what your experiences have been. I had a very strong positive on an ovulation stick just under 2 weeks after my miscarriage started. I know this can be due to remaining HCG but also had a definite negative on a pregnancy test a few days later ( I was advised to take one to confirm the end of the pregnancy). I guess hcg might have caused the positive opk and simply dropped to an undetectable level before the pregnancy test a few days later. Anyway just wondering what your experiences are of returning to ovulation after Mc. Thanks x

Right. I couldn't resist. I couldn't find any frer tests in any of the pharmacies and Amazon are only delivering in 4 days time 🤯
So I got a cheap pharmacy one. Now bearing in mind that I'm 4 days before my period is due. It's my 2nd wee of the days. And it's a big standard cheap test that goes for 25mlu of HCG... Anyone else see a really faint line?

@Bumblebee999 I had 28days between end of my miscarriage bleeding and my next period. My cycles are usually 24days in total. I don't know if I ovulated as wasn't testing. But it worked out as 24days from my negative pregnancy test.

@mrsmb03 I just had spotting that gradually turned into pretty much like a period. I had no scans. I was lucky to not need any further treatments. The gp and the EPU weren't interested as it was just one of those things. The negative pregnancy test indicated that the pregnancy was truly over so I just continued with my TTC journey. Not on IVF. I've been trying to conceive for about a year with the one miscarriage in September. Prayers are with that everything will turn out to be ok

@Sunflower1608 I can see a line!!

@Bumblebee999 I think it’s hard to say really as everyone is different. I didn’t do OPK tests immediately after I lost my DD or after my MC last year. If you get a negative HPT and then get a positive OPK then you can probably rely on that otherwise it is hard to say tbh. I’m sure some of the other ladies will be more help!

Thanks for the replies @Sunflower1608 and @BunnytheBlueWhale!

@Sunflower1608 I can see a line!

Hi all, just catching up on thread. Gentle congratulations to those who have got their BFPs. @LASandOtto best of luck today at your scan, let us know how you get on.

@Sunflower1608 I can see a faint line without opening the pic and I am normally really rubbish at seeing lines. Tentative congratulations.

So DH and I have decided to start TTC this month, two months after losing our DD last year at 41 weeks. Originally we said we'd just see what happens but we had a convo last night and agreed I would start tracking with OPKs and we'd properly try. We are concerned about our ages, DH will be 37 in August this year and I will be 37 in December. I am on CD11 now.

Having not done much tracking before, we caught with DD first month of really trying last year, I wanted to ask about CM. Today I have what I am pretty sure is EWCM but when I used the OPK this morning, there was no peak. Is EWCM an indication that ovulation is about to happen in the next day or two? We DTD last night but I am wondering now if I am in my FW so should DTD every other day to be in with a chance or wait for my peak and then DTD?

You should dtd before your peak @shefliesonherownwings because you are most fertile before you ovulate. EWCM is a good indication that now is a good time to dtd! Sperm can stay in the body before you ov but once you’ve ovulated the egg only sticks around for about 24 hours. I think the day we are most fertile is actually 2 days before ovulation (or so I have read). Absolutely keep dtd when you get your peak but do not wait for your peak.

@Sunflower1608 definitely a faint line there, tentative congratulations to you!

@Shefliesonherownwings my CM patterns have always been erratic due to my irregular cycles so can't advice you really, but definitely no harm in DTD every other day if you can so that you definitely catch the window! Good luck to you for this cycle.....

@Bumblebee999 same as above sorry I can't really offer an opinion as I have issues with irregular / infrequent ovulation. I think the general view is 10-14 days after bleeding ends, but it's different for everyone and sometimes you might not ovulate at all on the first cycle.

@mrsmb03 I have everything crossed for you, it's such a scary time and the not knowing is the hardest. I've managed to persuade the hospital to scan me at 7 weeks (3 weeks today if I make it that far), both my losses were apparent by that point so it's going to be a nervewracking few weeks until then. I swear time passes twice as slowly during early pregnancy, it's awful. Hope you are looking after yourself at this stressful time x

@LASandOtto hope your scan today went well, have been thinking of you

@bumblebee thanks for posting that question as I was also interested to find the answer to that. How many weeks did you miscarried if you don't mind me asking.

@Sunflower1608 Can't believe health professionals aren't as sympathetic in cases like that. How many weeks were you when you miscarried. Good Luck hope you conceive soon. Will pray for you.

From post above I meant brown discharge for a few days not weeks.

Second cycle TTC after Pregnancy loss in November. Ovulated much later than usual so a bit unsure what to expect! Testing on the 29th x

@Shefliesonherownwings I had ewcm 2 days before my LH peak. The advice I've read is to do it every other day or so leading up to the surge as sperm lurks around x

@Avocuddles Thank you I have been lying down sleeping and praying a lot, been off for a few days at work but will be back tomorrow. My second scan is on Friday. You have some good news I wish you luck. I'm quite new here so not really understanding half the time what the abbreviations mean. But wish you all the best!

So are people trying as soon as they ovulated after the miscarriage bleeding ended? Is there a medical recommendation on when women should TTC again?

@mrsmb03 to be honest the main thing about TTC again is making sure that you feel ready. After my first miscarriage we tried again as soon as my miscarriage was over and I'd had a negative pregnancy test (this is the important bit medically), however in retrospect it was too soon, I wasn't mentally or physically healed yet.
Second time round we took a couple of months out before we tried again and I do feel emotionally a lot stronger now and more prepared to face whatever the future holds.

Feel free to ask for any abbreviations to be explained! First one.....EWCM = egg white cervical mucus!

@BeeBeeW good luck for the 29th!

Tentative congratulations @Sunflower1608 keeping everything crossed for you x

@Shefliesonherownwings I used to get ewcm for 2-3 days before the opk peak. Since my miscarriage in October, I’ve had no peak at all, but a regular 28/9 day cycle and ewcm around days 11-13 so from my experience I’d go with dtd when you get ewcm and not worrying about opks too much.

After performance issues since the MC, we finally managed to dtd last night. Had a really good open chat with DH & he agreeed to AI at home if needed. I really didn’t think he’d go for it, and that took the edge of enough that we actually managed to do it anyway. Feel like a huge weight has been lifted and that we’re both on the same page for loving forward. I’m on CD 13 now, so hopefully in with a chance. Will hopefully also try tonight or tomorrow as well 🤞

Wishing everyone good wishes xx

@mrsmb03 the general advice is wait one cycle, but that's just for dating purposes. Technically you can get on to trying to conceive immediately after a negative test. But honestly wait it should be when the person feels emotionally and physically ready. I obsessed about getting immediately caught again and it was like miscarrying all over again when I came on my period.

@tmc congratulations from getting past this hurdle. I know it's a typo loving instead of moving... But defo get the loving on 😆
Fingers crossed

@Avocuddles @Shefliesonherownwings hey lovely ladies! Thanks for asking about how it went. I was a nervous wreck.

I had a huge argument with DH yesterday as he said 'so when are you back at the clinic?' and I said  errr tomorrow morning (i.e. today), we have a scan at 9.40am? And he responds 'oh well you didn't tell me that, I've got a dentist appointment at that time.' Anyway, I lost my sh*t and showed him my WhatsApp from Friday where I had told him that we'd have a scan Monday. He kept arguing I didn't say a time and wouldn't it have made sense that I would've mentioned that it would be at 9.40am bla bla. Anyway, I was enraged and said I felt like I'm the one carrying all the burden, all he needs to do is wait for my messages and updates from when I've been to the clinic (and I've been there almost every two days since week 4). I'm here taking loads of medication, injection, you name it - it's not easy and whilst I'm resilient the nerves about the scan obviously got the better of me. We were all fine eventually yesterday but it did really annoy me. It's not easy as I'm sure sometimes you think being so closely monitored is more reassuring (and it is) but it's a huge expense too and I just hope so much that all will be well!

Went this morning and they even fit me in early which was so appreciated and we could see all measured ok on scan and HB was seen, they seemed fine with that. I'm waiting to hear on blood results.

So it's a relief we've crossed this hurdle today but I know that there's a lot more to come as I've seen HB's before and had bad news a week after. I'm there next on the 31/01 all else being well, fingers crossed.

How are you both?

@Avocuddles did you speak to your consultant already? Are you doing any blood tests or just going to wait and see?

@Shefliesonherownwings hope getting back to TTC is ok for you, I was never very good with tracking cervical mucus so I ended up buying the CM Digital Monitor for £80 odd on Amazon and I found it helpful. I generally despise peeing on sticks but my DH and I do have jobs that mean we are away some nights so, the fun times need to be a bit more scheduled.

@mrsmb03 I don’t mind you asking at all :) I’m glad to be able to talk about these things! I was 12 weeks and I had a total miscarriage (no medical intervention). I had a scan at 8 weeks that showed heartbeat and good size so no idea what happened after that.

I was advised at hospital to use condoms or abstain from sex until Bleeding stopped but this was to avoid infection. I was told I could TTC as soon as I wanted but that a negative pregnancy test would help with dating and confirm that any new pregnancy was a new one, and not residual hcg from the miscarriages. My partner isn’t ready to try again in any event, but I was keen to know of my body was getting back to normal cycles. I find it reassuring to know that I could (maybe) conceive if I tried. So emotional these days!

A bit more about me in case helpful for you or anyone else on here- I have polycystic ovaries but do not have PCOS (the syndrome). I found this out when I had scans due to irregular periods about a year ago. Since then I had been using temperature to measure ovulation and by reducing stress had managed to get regular cycles, usually 31-33 days. One persistent problem I have had (for over a year) is high prolactin and I have been wondering if this contributed to my miscarriage. Googling it it seems it can contribute to miscarriage but I’m not sure.

@Shefliesonherownwings I have never had noticeable CM but was ovulating every month as confirmed by Temperatures and the pregnancy, so I never found it a reliable method. I do know that others find it very reliable though. Best of luck to you.

@lasandotto oh great news! 😃 I'm happy to hear all went well. So how far along did they date you now? About OH - That's annoying. It's exactly the same with us, I'm at the hospital A LOT for various tests and DH can't keep up. We also had an argument the other day - Dr told me I need to come back in 2 weeks for the viability scan (my hcg test was a good value and normal this time around thank god!), so I told DH I want to book Thursday (which is the last day of the week for us), and he's obviously coming. He said 'Thursday is dress down day, and if I need to nip out for a scan I need to fake an external meeting at work (as we're not telling anyone yet), and I don't want to wear a suit on a Thursday". Wtf?!?! I want to book a the last day of the week so I can go home and grieve if it's a negative scan! Last time (my mmc) I made the mistake of booking a scan in the morning midweek, I had to go back to work and pretend nothing happened 😡 They really have no idea sometimes I think!!!!

@bumblebee999 oh you are the first one I've met that have the same thing as me - PCO but not the syndrome! It's difficult because you don't know how much it actually affects your fertility. In my case, I always ovulate every month but it's just very late (ovulating on the 21-25 day, 10 day luteal phase). I've got some help bringing ovulation forward to 'get more chances' in trying for a baby, so this could be an option if you're the same as me? I'm pregnant now, early days though!

@sunflower1608 I see a line!!!! Definitely test again tomorrow, but congratulations.. 🥰

@missparkles81 thank you 🥰

@avocuddles how are you today? Xx

I second @bunnythebluewhale , always have sex when you notice EWCM! I have always got a positive OPK test a day or two later. For biggest chance of conception, having sexual a few days before means sperm will already be waiting for he egg when it's released. Due to a short surge sometimes, you can miss the window if you only have sex when you get a positive OPK as it can take a while for sperm to swim to the right place!

@SunStruck ah and you’re the first person I’ve met with the same as me! Yes the scan showed polycystic appearance on both ovaries but I didn’t have the other symptoms (although my LH and FSH levels were “mildly” reversed) so that wasn’t enough to diagnose PCOS. I also began ovulating regularly, with a bit of a variance in ovulation day- could be from day 17 to day 22, but predictable 13 days post ovulation to period. I found temperature charting a life changer as I had a marked change after I ov’d. I never had much luck tracking with sticks or CM. I conceived on first cycle, but then sadly miscarried of course. I think (and hope) that the polycystic ovaries are not significant now as I know I can conceive...but worry if the egg quality of affected or if my high prolactin contributed to miscarriage. I guess I won’t know until (and if) I conceive again. Congratulations on your pregnancy it really is encouraging to read good news- thanks for sharing

So lovely to be seeing all these positives! Of course, early days but I have everything crossed for you all!! Fills the rest of us with hope!

I miscarried in November and have had a fairly long recovery. I'm currently on the pill in an attempt to stop the bleeding (worked well, just hoping it has reset everything and doesn't come back once I'm off pill). I'm literally counting down the days until I finish this pack to try again!! Have read that you may even be more fertile following miscarriage so I'd agree as long as you are emotionally ready I'd go for it.

Can I ask, are you all paying for private early scans or do you get these on NHS following miscarriage?

Also, not great with all these abbreviations 🙈