Anyone else starting their TTC journey in next few month?

[MrsMacG10]

I'm 35 and me and hubby will be starting to try in the next 2-3 months after our honeymoon.
Terrified as to if we are ready and also worried about my age 😬 anyone want to share their journey with me?xxx

Welcome @blackpinkinyourarea - feel I’ve posted lots in this thread today! Haha I’m not sure why but I don’t feel comfortable speaking with my friends often about this. I have two close friends who have been trying for a year and I think my enthusiasm might be hard for them atm as they’re feeling down.

I hope I continue to feel enthusiastic - quite concerned about how this journey might affect my emotional/mental health. I don’t want TTC to become overwhelming and consume me!! Anyone else have these fears?

@RedFormica yes I have these fears too!

I've been reading up on it all and have come across so many stories about it taking up to a year, longer than a year etc that the panic has set in before we've even started! I know it sounds silly I just assumed it would happen straight away! (Which of course it could but who knows)

I'm such a planner I don't like the idea of the unknown. Going to get the above book and read at the weekend so thanks for the suggestion!

I have four mates who all got pregnant within six months so it's making me think the odds are against me.

I am struggling to think it will be that easy for all of us. I'm already feeling down before starting. Also, it's the two week wait, so every month for half the month my life is ok hold for something that may or may not happen which isn't good for a control freak!

@RedFormica @H8624 I definitely have the fears as well. Like you I am a huge planner and don’t cope well with unknowns that are out of my control!

I’ve been doing lots of reading too and trying to get into the mindset of it being perfectly normal to take a year, although I know I will still worry if it doesn’t happen sooner than that. So many people also say that it happened once they relaxed about it- relaxing about things isn’t going to be my strong point so hoping that doesn’t negatively affect anything! Glad we are all in the same boat and having similar feelings 😊

There’s a lot of anxiety involved in this journey - we can prepare for positive outcomes by reading up on conception, taking supplements etc but it’s vital we prepare for the times before we finally get that positive result too!! I’m trying to limit any chance I’ll start feeling frustrated, overwhelmed and depressed at not getting pregnant when I hope. Honestly swimming really helps centre my mind! And I would totally recommend it - when you’re in the water and concentrating on completing a length that is all your mind is on. It gives your whole mind a bit of a break!! Was considering yoga too!

I’m not sure where I read this, I think it might be the nhs website but those of us who are 35 plus - we are advised to see advice from
GP if we don’t get pregnant after 3-6 months I think. The timeline will be different for younger TTCers.

I love to swim! Find being in the water so relaxing. Think I would definitely want to try a water birth as I just love being in the water.
Have you started taking any supplements?

Swimming is amazing! I tend to go to the pools that have a spa / health suite attached so it’s more of a treat haha Obviously can’t use the health suite once pregnant though so will have to make the most of it now. ;)

Yeah I’m taking supplements atm - pregnacare, folic acid, evening primerose oil, magnesium with b vitamins, cod liver oil and a women’s health multi vitamin. So quite a bit! I bought these vitamins from Wilko- where they’re really reasonably priced. Poundland do vitamins too! I got the pregnacare from Superdrug and it was £7! Might see if wilko have their own version.

I read that maca powder was supposed to help boost ovulation too so will try that next month! Really enjoying watching all
Of the TTC vids on YouTube atm. Most give really good advice!

Are you guys taking anything atm?

This new thread on supplements is a good read! www.mumsnet.com/Talk/conception/3674069-My-TTC-Tool-Kit

Wow that’s quite a list! Have you noticed any difference to your cycles since taking them?
I’ve been taking folic acid and vit d for a few months but now it’s closer to starting TTC I am planning on looking into a few more. Have heard that the pregnacare/seven seas are expensive too, definitely worth looking for a cheaper option! Thanks for the link- will have a read through

Hi!

I will join you all.
I am 30 and my husband is 31.
We got married in Feb and are starting to try next month. I came off the pill last year to give my body a break.
I have inflammatory arthritis so had to think carefully about drugs.

My husband has suddenly become extremely anxious (he has anxiety and takes meds for it) about even doing the deed as he feels there’s now so much pressure and worries about miscarriage as he knows how much I want a baby.

Everyone around me has babies!! My sister conceived her children in the first month of trying, two friends took 10-14months, one 3 months and one first time.

I hope this journey isn’t a long, painful one 😩

Oh! And I’ve been taken folic acid 5mg since April, I have to take a higher dose due to my medication

@zinrepus me n my oh are the same as you n yours in that we love our life as we are, free to do as we please. Weve always been a bit, oh yea we'll have kids at some point. But recently I've been actively thinking about it more and more. I think about all the places we go to on days out n think oh wouldn't it be lovely to have a child of our own to share that with. I think this maybe brought on by the fact that, allot of friends and work colleagues close to me are pregnant, or have babies.

@MrsCBaby anxiety can be so debilitating! While we all want BFP and a healthy baby in the future we must value our lives as they are. Putting all of our emotional energy into having a baby can put so much pressure on ourselves and our OHs. Be kind to yourself! :) Your OH needs to be kind to himself too!!

@MrsB25 I’ve not seen any major differences so far! Although I did take a combination of women’s health multi vits and vitamin b complex in the past to help regulate my moods during pms and boost my energy. Found this really helpful!!

@MrsB25 I’ve only taken pregnacare and the other fertility related supplements for 2 weeks so far!!

For me, I'm wanting to have a child most of the time, in a quiet patient way. When I'm in my fertile window though... It ratchets up dramatically and I struggle to focus on anything else.

I'm keen for us to get our move sorted. My husband at this point is relatively happy to point out to me that I'm the one stopping us, though for good reasons. I don't want to have kids where we are because we have no community here. The friends we have are all at least an hour away and we don't see them often. Combine that with changing care providers mid-pregnancy and it makes sense for us to hold off a bit. Talking myself through the logic points usually brings me back when I get too broody.

Any particular YouTube channels you can recommend @RedFormica? Or anyone else?

@zinrepus when are you thinking of moving? It’s a challenge trying to plan a baby when life things get in the way! I was in a similar situation and I face a similar dilemma atm as I’m in the middle of retiring from my current career and retraining in another (nursing!). My plan was to retrain when the baby is around a yr old but tbh it difficult to plan around that as I have no idea when I’ll actually get pregnant so I’m moving forward with my plans to start a course next year and if the baby arrives before then, I will defer a year. My priority was to just try for a baby and see what happens - we might get lucky and it fit in within my preferred timeline. But as we all know, life is never as neat as that! Haha

If you search TTC journey or the truth about TTC on YouTube, lots of vids will come up!! From well known bloggers to people with less followers. There’s a massive spectrum of people out there offering advice and talking about their experience. Searching TTC tips also brings up some good vids! I’ve surprisingly found them more informative than the books I’ve got so far. It’s a comfort to hear others actually talk about what they’re going through.

Our unofficial goal was before 2020, with DH finding a job up there, followed by me asking work if they'll let me do my role distance (my industry won't interview applicants from afar, his will). If work says no, I'll be on the job hunt, which is fine by me.

At this point DH has gotten a verbal offer, so we're muuuuch closer to the actual move. We'll need to move house again at some point up there, but that can probably wait. The main annoyance is there's a 3 month wait here for coil removal. I'm hoping that will be much shorter up north so we can get settled and get this sucker out as soon as possible!

I'll check out some of those channels tomorrow (time at home without DH).

He mentioned to me the other day that us having kids doesn't become a reality for him until we're actually pregnant. I started laughing thinking about these forums and the guidance doctors tell you about folic acid and the like. If only it were that easy!

Oh absolutely @RedFormica I’ve said to him that he should be loving life that he can do the deed as much as he wants without horrible condoms 🤣
He just overthinks and worries about things, that’s just him and makes him who he is. I’ve said if he’s really concerned then we should visit as doctor to discuss worries.
He really wants a child and he is fantastic with our Nieces so I know he will be a wonderful dad. It’s just the pressure of sex suddenly meaning more, you know?

What’s everyone doing so far in terms of their journey? Has anyone been tracking ovulation?
I’ve been using Flo but unsure if it’s accurate.

@zinrepus Arghh the 3 month wait for coil removal must be so frustrating! Look at this way - it's 3 more months to prepare. All will be ok!! And it sounds like you're well on your way for the move, which is great.

My partner is the same in that 'its not a reality yet...' - this mode of thinking really annoys me tbh. My partner and i had a little tiff over this last weekend. Men need to get to grips with the reality that women's bodies are pretty complex and that things like this need a level of gentle preparation and planning. haha Also i think a lot guys feel a bit redunant during the process. Poor them feeling like they're used only for their bodies. ;)

@MrsCBaby I've not taken ovulation tests but i have been tracking my cycle on the Clue app which is pretty good!

Yeah, the three months means I can focus on being irresponsible a bit longer. Additionally, I know I don't want to fall pregnant pre-move (as there are just the two of us, so I'll be helping with the heavy lifting). Touch wood the wait time is more like a month up north! In the meantime, I've been delving deep into the moving research (creeping on flats, getting removal quotes so we can discuss methods, etc).

@RedFormica Yeah, I wish there was more they needed to do as it just feels like I'm prepping and he doesn't need to do anything. DH came with me for my appointment to talk to the doctor about everything in anticipation. GP talked me through drinking and smoking habits, what I should avoid, some exercises to do, etc. DH asked what he could do and the doc basically said, "I mean...you do your bit. You have no control what quality sperm gets there, so don't bother worrying about it." Talk about a reality check for influence! (GP did follow up with, "YOUR JOB IS TO SUPPORT HERRRRR" which helped)

@MrsCBaby I did some more intense tracking between my hormonal and copper coil on Natural Cycles (one year, then bailed out as I realised I could do it on my own without the hefty price tag). Since then I haven't been temp/ovulation tracking, but I have legit years of data on my Clue app as well as the obvious mood shifts during my fertile phase. I'll probably go for what Impatient Woman calls the Husband's Favourite method (every other day for 2/3 of cycle). See how we get on and then swap to more measured methods if we don't fall pregnant in the first few months.

I’ve been trying to track since coming off the pill but I’ve been so irregular I don’t think my data is much use yet! I’ve got Flo and Ovia on the go at the moment to see which one I prefer/ whether they tell me the same thing! I’ve been trying to track my CM a little bit and think I’m starting to get to grips with that. I don’t seem to get many symptoms so hoping that everything is working as it should.
I have bought some cheap OPKs so might have a go with those this month. Any of you used them before?

I've been taking pregnacare all month but struggle swallowing them (even broken in half!!) @RedFormica i watched a TTC tips vid on youtube last night that mentioned maca powder so planning on researching it..hadnt heard of it until i came across that video.
MRSB25 I have also got a bunch of cheap OPKs from Amazon. planning to use them all sept just to see whats going on and if/when im ovulating as my implant will have screwed everything up im guessing!

@blackpinkinyourarea omg yes those pregnacare tablets are HUGE and take some getting used to. Most of the multi vits are big ones!! Would really like to try Maca powder too but will see how things go this month.

You might have come across a few vids mentioning the menstrual cup as aiding conception too. I have never used one of these before and tried yesterday...it get popping open in my hand haha Once i got it to suction on to the inside of my vagina, it was a weird sensation. You can't 'feel' it as such and its not painful at all but you know something has just suctioned on. FROM THE INSIDE! Will see how things go with it after DTD.

@MrsB25 I have just got some OPKs from Amazon - a big pack of 30 was only a fiver. Haven't yet used them as want to see how things go for now with just regular BDing.

Have also just bought the impatient woman's guide to getting pregnant! What to expect before youre expecting is a bit dry for my liking tbh. While super informative cor blimey is it a boring read. I am currently curled up in bed hoping to have a relaxing day of reading but this book just keeps sending me off to sleep!!!

Im flipping fuming and could cry, they have cancelled my appointment for tomorrow with no explanation! Where i live its really difficult to get appointments without waiting weeks on end. I now have to wait til monday and go to a clinic almost an hour away..it was that or wait nearly another month to go somewhere closer. I know its only a few extra days but i feel like im living in limbo and just WANT THIS IMPLANT OUT . Maybe its my fault for posting on this board to soon. I should have stayed lurking!