TTC after pregnancy loss - Thread 29 - huddle up and bring on the BFP's!

[Laney79]

Hey ladies, we were nearing the limit on thread 28 so here's a new one.

Roll Call...

Name: Laney79
Age: 39
TTC: #1 since autumn 2017.
2 losses - MMC discovered March 2018, MMC discovered Sept 2018 both at what should've been 9 weeks, bean and bow measured 6 weeks.

@Lilimum6 @Russkispy @Catconfusion @Boboelephant @fnej01 please tag and pass on!

@moonpeace I'm going to an initial acupuncture consultation on Wednesday!

Happy Mother’s Day to you all! I’ve just bumped into my neighbours and met their 3 week baby, managed it surprisingly well. Basically adopted the manner in which I dote on my cat which seemed to work!

@moonpeace I’m going to try acupuncture once I’ve got some money together. I’m dubious it will do anything for fertility but I’m in it for the relaxation. I’m sure it was stress that messed up my cycles after the last miscarriage, and I don’t want that happening this time.
@laney79 sounds sensible in that cast to hold off on the pill. I feel like you need to have a consultation with a specialist to go through all your results. You need to know in clear terms because your GP is being unhelpful and it’s not good for your anxiety.

Sorry I've been crap at keeping up.

Just wanted to say I'm thinking of you all today. The mothers who didn't get to hold their babies and those whose babies were take too soon. Much love to you all xxx

@moonpeace thanks for asking and sorry its taken so long to reply. I am finding things more difficult as time goes on, and whilst I continue to read the thread I've not posted as I don't really feel I have anything positive to contribute than self-pity! Having said that in answer to your question about acupuncture, I started having it about 6 weeks ago and am on my second cycle with acupuncture treatment. Don't know if it will help fertility wise but I figured it was worth a shot. I am finding it quite relaxing and my acupuncturist has also had recurrent miscarriage so I find some therapeutic benefit from that too as I really feel she "gets" what I am going through.

Hi ladies 👋🏼

I've been off Mumsnet a while.
Had a MMC late January/early Feb and had EPRC on 21/2. Still waiting for af to come. Done 2 pg tests now and both have been negative. Wish I'd tracked ovulation now just so I had an idea when I should expect to come on. Not been using any protection so just letting nature take its course.
How long did it take you all to get back into a cycle?
Mine were normally around 33-36 days anyway but I'm not on cd38.

Also, thinking of everyone today who have had losses.
Really hits home ❤️

Hi @MrsLBear I'm sorry for your loss.

I had an ERPC for mmc at 12 weeks, baby was 6/7 weeks on 4th Feb. I ovulated 4 weeks after the surgery (I normally ovulate 3/4 weeks after cd1) this was just over a week after my negative pregnancy test. I found out ten days later I was pregnant again on FRER. Unfortunately I started bleeding on 19th March so a chemical pregnancy. My cycle was therefore 43 days if day of surgery cd 1. My cycles are normally 5/6 weeks long so seemed normal length. AF was horrendous when it came. It was a mixture of the another loss and first bleed since surgery.

If you know when you got a negative test after surgery might give a clue to when you ovulated as usually about a week later. Maybe give it a few days and test again. Good luck and I hope that helps! Xx

@InDreamland

Hope your DH takes things a bit more seriously now. Hopefully now you have some answers you can work towards something that will work for you🤞

Hope Mothers’ Day has been gentle to you all

Still not tested! 13dpo and I haven't yet

Good luck @ale2992 for when you do!

Morning ladies, I'm glad yesterday is over I can't handle another pregnancy bomb 💣. Why do they do it on mother's day.

Well as for me I'm 5 or 7 dpo fertility friend app can't make its mind up. Not feeling confident though. My temps are already on the way back down. Low progesterone? I don't know. Want this cycle over so I can plan the next one better.

How are you lovely ladies getting on?

Hi

I'm Sophie (obvs!). Found out six weeks ago that we would miscarry. Been a rough few weeks.

Have a 2.5yr old daughter. Really want her to have a sibling.

I have so many questions for you all... will come back to this and respond properly.

@sophied1983 welcome, sorry you find yourself here. It's a great thread with some great people. I hope you're doing OK, such a shitty situation x

@Lilimum6 I don't temp as I know it would drive me wild, I hope you got lucky this cycle.

I'm CD9 and I've started OPKs yesterday as I don't know where my cycle is - this is my first one post MC. We're away with friends this weekend when Ovia is predicting O, hopefully she comes a bit earlier.

How are you getting on @Laney79 @AliceRR

@ale2992 Have you tested yet?

Sorry ladies, gonna be selfish for a moment. I just need to offload. Saw a colleague this morning (from a few meters distance in the office) who I haven't properly seen for a while and I swear she is now sporting a very obvious baby bump. I really don't need this. I thought a few weeks when I saw her that she looked like she had a little belly she never had before but thought that it was just the top she was wearing but now I think it's very obviously a baby bump.

I found yesterday so hard celebrating Mother's Day with my family for my mum and seeing them hand out flowers to all the mums at church.

After the most shitty March I just want to curl up at home and never face the world again.

@Frillyfarmer nope, I'm too scared to.

@moonpeace I'm tempted to try acupuncture but wouldn't know where to start with finding a reputable practitioner.

@Mistymeow you done well to handle seeing the baby. Not sure I'd cope well at all.

Thanks @AliceRR. I'm just still so mad at him, I'm really hurt about how his behaviour has made me feel and what I've been through. How are you?

@Lilimum6 I think there is no good time for pregnancy bomb. Fx you're still in this cycle. Remember you're not out until the witch shows.

@Sophied1983 sorry you find yourself here. It's a shit experience but everyone here is so supportive. Don't know what I'd have done without these ladies.

@Fillyfarmer fx for this cycle!

@ale2992 where in your cycle are you?

How has be been with you since you had the results @InDreamland? Hopefully he's pushing to get an appointment xx

I'm sorry you've all been there too.

Only one friend recognised that yesterday might have been tough for me.

Did anyone else find their bleeding was prolonged after miscarriage? I'm so confused today by what my body is up to.

@Frillyfarmer he has been nice to me and trying to sort out appointments. He has one with GP next week and the private specialist on Friday which is tentative depending on whether the private referring to him can get paperwork over in time.

I'm just so hurt and angry he's out me through so much the past 5 years and taken no responsibility at all and put everything on me making me feel like the biggest inadequate useless loser there is and blaming myself for the 2 mc's. 5 out of 6 years I've been made to feel like this. When I tried a few times to suggest it might be him and he should try supplements and cutting down on alcohol he just totally refused point blank. Even after mc #1 he said well I got pregnant so it can't be him which makes me feel like he must therefore think it's me. So many other things that he said which made me feel like it's all just me. Like I am the one responsible.

I am not sure how I'll ever get over that. How can the man I love do this to me?

Welcome @Sophied1983 sorry you have joined this club. I've got a DD that's just under 2.5 and think she would make a great big sister.

@InDreamland cd29 13dpo

Was sick Saturday twice and have felt sick all day but I'm getting some slight cramping/pain around my ovaries on and off this evening which makes me think maybe I'm wrong and af is coming but I don't know I feel sicker than I did when I was pregnant prior to my MMC

Sick on Sunday sorry

@ale2992 good luck, I’d be tempted to do an ic if you have one!
@catconfusion how are you doing? Where are you in your cycle?
@sophie1983 sorry for your loss. Did you have surgery or a natural miscarriage? It’s quite normal to bleed for a number of weeks after a miscarriage. Have you had a negative pregnancy test? If you’re still testing positive after 2 weeks you should let EPU know in case you have some pregnancy tissue (that may become infected). Is the bleeding heavy with clots or light?
@indreamland can understand your anger. We sort of feel that my miscarriages are down to dh’s sperm, but we will never know for certain. Your dh clearly has some making up to do but really it’s also a wider problem that so much of the testing is focussed on the woman, so in a way I see how he was influenced by this. It’s very unfair. However, you know now and he’s doing the right thing. I know you’re angry but it won’t do you any good to look back. Give yourself time to recover from this new news and start working on being a team again. Have a pact that there will be no blame going forwards (I have this with my DH) and focus on the future.

I think af might make an appearance soon three weeks after erpc and without ovulation. Did anyone else have this? It’s a shame but at least we will have a starting point soon.