The July 19ers - All aboard the rollercoaster for a 3rd lucky thread

[Frazzlerock]

@rather that sounds so scary. Glad you're safe.

@frazzle I just want to wrap you up in hugs. I'm sure many of us who've been through similar feel the same at times. That's why i don't post here as much as everyone else. I don't wanna constantly moan or just offload my anxieties on others. How you feel is natural given what you've gone through. Don't be hard on yourself.

@pegase how are you today?

So that ISIS girl had her baby .........I must be nuts thinking a kind British journalist could bring that baby back here and I could adopt him and bring him up in a safe loving environment.

Awwwww @frazzle sorry you are feeling down. No one here wants you to go (especially me- my ovusense just arrived and I will need help working out what it's telling me 😛) but if it's too painful seeing others fall pg then that's fair enough if you want to protect yourself.

This is the weirdest AF I've ever had. Extreme bleeding and now next to nothing (day 4) mind you I did have some clotting pills. It's just getting heavier and weirder all the time, is it my age??

@InDreamland pretty rubbish but forced myself to take a walk in the sunshine with DD to cheer up. She said she would really like us to have a baby as she has nobody to play with

Am currently thinking through all the potential recurrent miscarriage / IVF treatment pathways which is cheery when I still need management of the current mc situation

I'm also on day4 @Betty so we might be starting our Ovusense cycles together. If you need any help with it then let me know. There is also a really useful FB group called Ovusense Users Group:
www.facebook.com/groups/ovusense.users/

Thanks for the understanding from everyone here. I have been for a run in my lunchbreak and I feel slightly better - well less tearful anyway xx

@Pegase xxx

Still no positive opk for me despite loads of ewcm yesterday. Idk if I missed the surge or maybe ovulation stalled because of travelling (which I've read can happen).

Dtd this evening but I think I'll have to give it a rest tomorrow because thrush is definitely back and it's quite sore (not during so much but afterwards - ouch! 😭)

@InDreamland, I was thinking that earlier... Have you watched the interview? She didn't even glance at the baby once. I appreciate she is traumatised and is likely suffering with a plethora of problems, not least PND, but she showed no love at all

@Frazzle so pleased you're feeling slightly more positive x

X post @Kinsters, sorry your thrush is back but at least you managed to dtd. If there's that much ewcm, hopefully you'll O in the next day or two so fab timing!

Hey ladies
I have a load to catch up with today!!

@Frazzlerock every time I had a moment on here (positive or negative) I worry I'm pushing people off, but I've learned that everyone on here is here to support.
I honestly don't know what I'd do without being able to speak rant on here!
I felt awful after declaring my bfp so outwardly and I'm sorry if that hasn't helped your stress. I really hope you won't leave and I really hope you feel a little brighter soon.

@ratherbeshowjumping that sounds awful. I'm glad you have the sense to go and lock yourself away in the car. I have a tendency for my training bravado to kick in and my mouth works quicker than my legs which is something I hate about myself sometimes as I forget I don't always have to brave the confrontation!!

@Kinsters Thrush!! Eugh!!! I honestly think you should try a yakult!!

@tigsy please don't feel bad. Honestly, I'm just a hopeless case.
I've been like this since we lost our first and I will probably continue to be until I hold my baby in my arms. And I'll probably be a misery even then when I realise once again that I can't produce milk and all those horrid useless feelings will come flooding back.

We are all here to support eachother in TTC so pregnancy is bound to happen for most of us (hopefully all). I need to get over myself somehow.

There's a new baby behind me on the train. It's breaking my heart listening to the gurgles.
Music is now on LOUD!

DP has just suggested fish and chips tonight. Most of that is stuff I shouldn't eat but fuck it. I've been good all day and ran at lunchtime.
Then I might crash into bed and hopefully be a better me in the morning xx

@Betty I have been told by so many medics that AF can go weird generally so after mc it can be even more messed up.

@Pegase I really hope that is not the case and you still have a chance this one is nestled in and comfortable.

@Kinsters hopefully you've DTD enough. Hope the thrush clears up quickly.

@rather I watched a few of her interviews and found them really chilling, made my blood run cold. The things she said about the Manchester bombing, no remorse, in fact she smirked, no compassion and tried to justify it. No good wishes or love sent to her family here. Then had the nerve to say the British people should have sympathy for her. I really feel for that baby and all the others out there. That child needs a safe and loving environment to grown up in. Can't do anything about nature but certainly can try to nurture in a way that gives them the best chance of turning into a kind, loving and tolerant human being. It's heartbreaking to know so many children out there have such little hope of a stable, safe and healthy future.

@frazzle I am so tempted by fish and chips. Unlike you though I've been unhealthy today. Bowl of coco pops, cashew nuts and fish finger butty.

I second what everyone else has said Frazzle... we’re all here for each other, every element of this depressing rollercoaster.
I also felt bad about announcing my bfp. I’ve convinced myself it isn’t going to end well again and so I really appreciate having this group for support. The thought of a group similar to the one we were in previously - where women are discussing names and schools straight after their bfp, like the positive outcome is inevitable - makes me feel really uncomfortable and upset.

@Buggles1 have you seen on the pregnancy board there is a thread for those pregnant after loss. I was considering joining that when I got my BFP in November because I was so anxious after having the mc in July. I had a quick read and the ladies there sound very nice. They'll understand the anxieties of pregnancy after mc. I'm not saying to leave us here but just suggesting an additional line of support for you. I'm hoping I will actually be able to join them one day soon and stay on there until I have my baby in my arms at home x

Thanks @InDreamland... I only access on my mobile and the website isn’t that friendly for searching etc so I’ve tended to stick to what I know... will have a look though!

@frazzle I need your help already with ovusense! Does it not chart anything other than temp/period/sex/hpt? Anywhere you can put in CM or other signs/symptoms?

@Betty no just those four things. It's supposedly so accurate it doesn't need the extra input. It uses core temp which they say is far more accurate than basal body temp.
I only used Ovusense once and got preg that cycle because it told me early enough when I was ovulating without any extra input.
Since we lost that baby I've used it along side the free version of FF but I still use Ovusense as my main ovulation prediction.
Also don't use it while you're on your period. I don't know why, maybe discolouration or unreliable temps. Once your period has stopped you can start using it xx

PS I hope none of you lovely pregnant ones leave or feel they can't share stuff on here.
I'd hate that.

Tigsy I love yakult and drink at least one a day! Doesn't seem to help me with thrush much though.

I'm having a down day today. If I don't get pregnant this cycle then next cycle is a no hope because DH is away. So then there's no chance of a 2019 baby. At least the longer ovulation is delayed this cycle I can inch closer and closer to being able to try next cycle.

Thought I would share a nugget of wisdom this morning from my oh-so-clever DH....

OPKs are the creation of the devil. If it wasn't for OPKs, I wouldn't be depressed that I've lost a baby. The reason I still cry 3 months on = OPKs.
Upset because I'm going on holiday bumpless (booked just before I found out I'm pg) = OPK!
Reason I cry when I got a BFN = OPK (even though I didn't even use one on that day...)
Everyone else seems to get pregnant without using OPKs (obviously he's conducted serious research) so the reason I'm not pregnant yet... yep you guessed it... OPKs!!!

So, whatever you're doing ladies, don't use OPKs because they're clearly the reason why some of us don't have BFPs yet 🤷🏽‍♀️👍🏼

I'm actually surprised he hasn't seen the link between world poverty, ISIS, Trump & OPKs yet.

Fuming does not sum it up this morning 😡🙈

Wisdom indeed! I know we all want someone to blame for all of this, but I can't help thinking your DH is barking up the wrong tree 🧐

Thanks @frazzle .. this means I'll be obsessing over 2 separate apps then! Will be interesting to see if they identify the same Ov date, although I think my OvaGraph app takes CM into account as well.

@ratherbeshowjumping my DH is exactly the same!
He calls it 'all bullshit' and just fake preying on 'gullible dickheads' (that's us btw)
He cant explain how the cbfm and internet sticks both show LH surge / peak at the same time tho.... that's just witchcraft I guess!

Fucking men!!!

Are they not interested in science or biology at all tigsy and rather? My DH was quite dismissive of all the TTC science to begin with but then got more interested when I explained it to him and talked about scientific studies. Though that wouldn't help if they're uninterested and won't listen to your explanation in the first place.

Oh he's interested in science.... just not THIS science . This science is bullshit.
OPKs - bullshit
Fertility monitors - bullshit
Temping - bullshit
Fertility friend - bullshit (are you seeing a theme)

We are now moving on to HCG - bullshit
Progesterone tests - bullshit

Apparently as they don't have this is Rwanda and the Victorian times and there are still many a baby born it's all hype made up to prey on gullible twats like us.
End of discussion.

@Betty lol definitely barking up the wrong tree...

@tigsy I'm so glad your DH is on the same page. We are both so lucky to have DHs who can spot the errors of our ways!

@Kinsters not at all, which I find surprising as he's so bright in other ways and loves learning about how things work.
Except OPKs. Because they're a scam.

Ffs not what you want to be dealing with first thing on a Thursday morning.