TTC after pregnancy loss - tread 28 - Bfp will be coming

[Lilimum6]

🐧🐧🐧🐧🐧🐧🐧🐧🐧🐧🐧🐧🐧🐧🐧🐧

Here's the new thread. This is a lovely supportive thread for anyone who has suffered the loss of a much wanted baby. Affectionately known as the penguin huddle- this is the place to survive the ups and downs of this crazy journey.

Welcome to any new ladies and sorry for your loss.

Let's have a roll call ladies

[strawberrye]

Hi everyone just thought I'd update you all on my RMC experience. My GP had already done blood tests for thyroid, coeliac disease and antiphospholipid syndrome. Bloods were normal apart from my thyroid which came back abnormal and I am now on treatment for that. I had a 3D ultrasound scan at the clinic which was also normal. My consultant said apart from the thyroid there's nothing to explain our losses. I felt a bit disappointed that she completely wrote off doing thrombophilia testing, any genetic tests or trying progesterone supplementation. She said she might consider genetic tests if we have 6 or 7 losses in total! Now trying to decide whether to carry on trying and see what happens or ask GP for a referral to a Tommy's clinic to get a second opinion.

[frillyfarmer]

@strawberrye sorry it wasn't more positive and she didn't really offer anything new to the table, that's really frustrating.

I don't really know what to suggest but definitely push for a Tommy's referral.

[frillyfarmer]

I'm really struggling with another week of not really knowing what's going on, and driving myself mad with ectopic pregnancy spotting.

I feel like everything is so completely up in the air and I can't even have my comforting glass of red wine in case by some miracle I've got some viable pregnancy inside me. I'm driving myself absolutely mad trying to trace dates backwards.

[strawberrye]

@frillyfarmer DH and I have discussed Tommy's referral and decided to wait until end of Feb to see GP to ask as I've got a mental workload at the moment and want to revisit the decision before then.

I can't even imagine how confused and lost you must feel. My second loss was a pregnancy of unknown location for about 10 days and that was a real mindful even just with blood HCG levels let alone a confusing ultrasound result too. Also crap that you feel you can't enjoy relaxing things like wine and a hot bath, I can understand why you want to avoid that though. Does chocolate help at all?

[strawberrye]

Not mindful, mindfuck!

[Lilimum6]

@strawberrye omg 6 or 7 losses are they mad deffo push for Tommy's hun. What madness and so unfair. Fingers crossed 🤞 for your next pregnancy now your thyroid is stable

[InDreamland]

Same here @Laney79, I'm thinking about my age too.

Agree about the private consultation so of course IVF would be pushed as we'd be paying for it. Although I could ask Nhs consultant to refer us for that if we wanted it but as I've said on the past it's just not for me.

Jumping in on the vitamin D chat. After my first mc my GP after having bloods done (in July did height of the summer) told me I was low on vitamin D so told me to have a supplement. I've been taking ever since, just bought a new lot actually, stronger this time, the 75ug ....... along with Feroglobin which has iron, folic acid and B12, also now told to take co-Q10 100mg x 3 a day.

[InDreamland]

@clumsykitten thank you. Yes, you're right about how society always sees it as something wrong with the female. Definitely give the vitamin D a go, sounds like from other comments it's worth a shot-have to admit I didn't realise the link with fertility and pregnancy, only started taking it because GP said I was low on it after first mc. It's a lot of Q10 but I'm willing to give it a go, Boots have their 3 for 2 offer on so got 3 months supply for just under £80.

My CB OPK is flashing smiley this morning. I'm only on CD9. Since August last year when I started using them (with a 1 month break after 2nd mc) I didn't get a flashing smiley until earliest CD10 and usually on CD11 or 12.

[Laney79]

@strawberrye that sounds like a really disappointing appointment. It's a real shame these doctors don't understand the mental impact their actions have on us. Did you have a full thyroid screen (tsh, t3, t4, antibodies)?

In terms of the testing-I'm surprised they wouldn't do a thrombophilia screen, but less surprised about the genetic testing. From what I've read they tend to genetically test any babies lost either after 12 weeks or if it's your third+ loss but they don't always do parental genetic testing (I read a document that seems to suggest they only do that if the babies results throw up something that could be passed on from the parent rather than a chance chromosomal abnormality). I guess it depends on your area, their particular focus in the RMC and sadly money. Genetic testing isn't cheap. Some drs won't prescribe progesterone unless you are doing ivf because of the results of the promise trial that said it doesn't improve outcomes-see here. https://www.miscarriageassociation.org.uk/research/the-promise-trial/

I think I'd ask for the referal to Tommy's...they may say the same but at least you know that they are the experts at the forefront of research into MC, and they are likely to do more tests (I asked for the list of standard tests they do at the Coventry clinic and it does include thrombophilia screen and a few other clotting disorder tests).

@frillyfarmer it's just awful having to wait like this. Sending hugs. We're here if you need to rant or need to chat through symptoms etc. Whatever helps.

@InDreamland And @Clumsykitten Yeah the vitamin D stuff is interesting. I just figure even if it only helps me mentally its worth doing, but that latest research does seem to suggest levels of 75nmol/l is better when it comes to pregnancy and miscarriage prevention. Hey if it isn't going to harm I'll try it!!! I'm also taking co-q10, but just 200mg a day, I may up it. I get mine from Tesco £5 for 30 but they are on 3 for 2 offer so it's not as expensive as it might be!!

The crazy has already set in 2dpo and I'm already symptom spotting I truly am bat shit!

[Laney79]

Oh and if your gp won't test for vit D it's one of the cheaper ones to get done-you can get a finger prick kit for about £30-40 I think.

[fnej01]

Morning ladies,

@Lilimum6 thanks for asking how I am. I am good, I actually get married today, so was just reading through the thread distracting myself from nerves lol.

Nothing to update from me TTC/RMC wise from me, but I just wanted to chip in @strawberrye @Laney79. I am under a Tommy's centre (St Mary's) but as I think I fed back at the time the appointment was fairly underwhelming. They are testing basics and thrombophilia, but that's it, no genetics. Then they said if all ok, they would discharge from RMC until I miscarry again, as it could just be age related. Just thought I would manage expectations as I am not sure Tommy's is the Holy grail.

Luck and baby dust to you all. Sorry for the quick pop in x

[InDreamland]

HAPPY WEDDING DAY @fnej01!!! Have a really special day xxx

[strawberrye]

@Lilimum6 @fnej01 @Clumsykitten @Laney79 thank you all for your messages of support. Initially I was feeling ok about the appointment but as it has settled in I'm feeling more frustrated and upset about it. I'm aware of the evidence and guidance re genetics and progesterone - I guess for progesterone I was hoping they'd give it a try even just for placebo effect as it still seems to be given to a lot of women in my position, I think purely just to help feel as if you are doing something. With regards to genetics I know that was a bit of a long shot, but at 5 weeks natural losses it is pretty much impossible to identify tissue to send off for testing, so I don't think I'd be able to have the fetus tissue tested if I continue to lose in the same manner - it just feels unfair that genetics testing is not available in any form because of the gestation I am losing at. I think what upset me most though was I did feel like my losses were robbed off- the consultant said some clinics don't even count losses before 6 weeks as losses, and maybe next time I fall pregnant I should have my blood HCG tested, which feels like she is insinuating I am making them up. I wish I had taken along all of the positive tests I and from home

[Lilimum6]

@strawberrye super 🐧 hugs coming your way hun jump in to the middle of the huddle we all feel your pain and frustration. Thank you for the updates though it has helped to make my decision about ttc or waiting for testing. I definitely need to dumb down my expectations from rmc when I get my appointment.

[Lilimum6]

@fnej01 happy wedding 💒 day hun. Hope its perfect and the sun shines for your special day xx

[Lilimum6]

@Laney79 vit d finger pick test how and where can I do this?

[Catconfusion]

Hi everyone, we’re very early on in the baby making journey but looking for some support and happy to offer support back.

I’m 39 with no children and got pregnant on my honeymoon in December the first time we’d not used contraception which was a happy shock. Had no problems apart from severe sickness and nausea. At 10 weeks I had a slight bleed. The midwife wouldn’t refer me so we had a private scan which revealed no heartbeat and baby hadn’t made it beyond 6 weeks. We felt devastated. I had an ERPC on Monday and all went well. Only bled for one day. Nausea and sickness have now gone thank goodness. I guess now we’re feeling scared something is wrong and we’ll miscarry again. Also wondering whether we should just go for it and hope for the best. We’re both 40 in the summer and feel like time is running out.

Hospital weren’t great after the op. We were told the baby would be checked for molar. I was confused by this as thought scan showed normal pregnancy. I guess maybe we should hold off until we know for sure not molar. We’ve really had no advice on when to try again just to obstain until bleeding subsided which it has.

Any thoughts on how soon to try again after a miscarriage would be appreciated. Also I’m seeing my GP soon. I know we can’t be referred to RMC but what checks should we get done. I don’t have diabetes and I’ve had my thyroid checked a few years ago and was normal.

Thanks everyone. I’m really looking forward to being part of this group.

[Lilimum6]

Can any of you ladies that chart bbt explain what is going on with my temps I'm not unwell at all so I don't understand!!

[Dimblebimble]

Hi everyone, I should be 6 weeks tomorrow but just had some brown tinged cm (had some red spotting just after missed period). Do you think I should phone the doctor? Will they see me at 6 weeks?

[Dimblebimble]

I still had a very strong line on the pregnancy test that I took this morning, not sure whether that makes a difference...

[Dimblebimble]

Thanks @Clumsykitten, after last time my mind goes to the worst case scenario at any hint of blood. It would be really hard to get to the epu today or tomorrow because of work, so I'll hold off for now. Really hope everything's okay 😔