TTC after pregnancy loss - tread 28 - Bfp will be coming

[Lilimum6]

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Here's the new thread. This is a lovely supportive thread for anyone who has suffered the loss of a much wanted baby. Affectionately known as the penguin huddle- this is the place to survive the ups and downs of this crazy journey.

Welcome to any new ladies and sorry for your loss.

Let's have a roll call ladies

@Laney79 if you remember I went for acupuncture to sort out my cycles after mc, the month I conceived this time I actually had ECWM 2 days before I got smiley face (1 day) then it went straight to static face so we had like 3 days to dtd rather than 5/6. If its there, ignore the stick ( but keeping POS obvs!), you're body is telling you its getting ready. I remember the days exactly, it was:

Tues/Wed=ECWM, nothing on stick
Thurs = Flashing Smiley face
Friday = Static Smiley
Sat am = ovulated ( had cramps)
Sunday - according to my due date, technically conceived :)

As I recall i think we DTD Thur Fri Sat

@Lilimum6 I think I'm with @fnej01 here - your body has been through an awful lot in a very short period of time. When I started acupuncture after 3rd, she asked me what I thought my energy and wellbeing level was out of 10, I said a confident 7. She took my pulses, looked at my tongue etc and said, actually, you're more like a 3.

The desire to be pregnant is so strong, but your body has to be strong enough to cope. Having got this far now, and knowing that being pregnancy after MC is really not easy, I'm glad I had a little time out in hindsight even if I didn't appreciate it at the time. You're emotional and physical wellbeing are highly connected - and both link to your ability to produce 'good eggs' and stay pregnant.

Even one cycle off, could make all the difference for you x

Sorry to see you here @jellybaby2019. What you're going through isn't easy and hopefully you'll find some comfort here with many women going through the same thing xx

@Jellybaby2019 sorry you find yourself here. The ladies here are so supportive though.

I think I will look into acupuncture.

I think I'm tipsy. Had whisky to try get rid of this cold ........

Evening ladies. My HGC has doubled in my two blood tests so I'm currently pregnant, no idea how/what/when to be honest, it was. 2 weeks since my scan confirming miscarriage.

I'm currently in bed with horrible lower back pain and spotting, not feeling optimistic in any way at all - I remember this pain.

Rdm
35
Ds age 3 easy conception and pregnancy
Ttc#2 for over a year now.
Mc in feb @10 wks, aug @11wks and dec @8 wks.
I was referred to rmc in August after mc2 but my appt wasn’t til last week. Had bloods taken and have scan booked for next month. Just got my appt to discuss the results and it’s not until June!! Over 10 months from referral to seeing the consultant (with another mc in the mean time!).
I’m carrying on ttc, I just can’t sit around and wait another 5 months when there’s a 50% chance they won’t be able to find a cause anyway.
I’m so desperate for my dc to have a sibling and the age gap just keeps getting bigger and bigger (if it even happens at all)

Sorry there’s so many of us going through this x

@frillyfarmer, cripes. I won’t say try not to think the worst as it’s not possible. Your hcg doubling in itself is a good sign. have you any idea at all when you could have conceived? X

@rdm10 that’s crazy. I just had my results posted to me and then met up afterwards. Perhaps call them and see if they can do that, perhaps it’s a mistake x

Hi ladies, hoping I can join in.
Age- turned 31 last week
DD 22months
TTC #2 since March ‘18
BFP straight away, delighted, cardiac defects found at 20 week scan and amino confirming T21 (live in Ireland so nuchal/screening isn’t performed)
TFMR 24w+2 Sept ‘18.
CP Nov’18
BFP Dec’18 resulted in mmc on Tuesday at scan for harmony bloods. Surgical management today.

My bleeding is super light, I was expected a lot more. Is this normal? I am counting today as CD1. AF returned 5 weeks exactly after my delivery in sept so hoping it’ll be even quicker this time?!

I am so sorry for all of your losses. This is no joke!

@fnej01 how long have you been waiting for your Appointment then. So if you got pregnant and had another loss they wouldn't see you at all, that sounds really hatch.
I'm not sure if I can sit on my hands for as long as you have, I'm the most impatient person to have ever lived. How long did it take to get your first letter.
I'm so confused by the whole thing. I was told nothing after my erpc on Tuesday and when I say nothing I mean nothing. I was given a drink and a sandwich and then asked if I had been for a wee. I didn't see a doctor or anyone after the procedure. When I arrived at epu a midwife took my bloods and told me they would refer me and then took me to the ward. I was told to get on the gown and get into bed. The surgeon came to ask what my story was and left. Then a very pregnant young doctor described in great detail what they would do to me and then signed the paperwork and left. Then to really rub it in a very pregnant nurse took me down for the op. After the op I saw no-one but the same nurse who brought me back to the ward and took my blood pressure etc. Then the ward sister gave me food and drink and then told me there was no doctor on ward to discharge me and that they would send it in the post. I'm totally lost as to what to expect. I rang epu but they didn't seem to want to talk to me really. I had to practically beg for a scan to make sure they got everything. No one gave me any after care advice or anything. To be honest I kind of felt like an inconvenience to them.

I really don't know what to do. I think I will have to book in with my gp but it takes weeks to get an appointment with him.

Oh @frillyfarmer how confusing. It's great news about the bloods, how is the pain and spotting now? I really hope it's gone and all is ok with your bean. Are they going to do another scan to see what's going on?

Welcome to the huddle @jellybaby2019 and @CherryO88 so sorry for your losses. The support here is incredible- these lasses are amazing.

@rdm10 June?!?!!! That's got to be a mistake surely! I'd definitely be ringing to ask why so long and if they could send you your results before then. It's cruel to make you wait that long, and your results are just that, yours, so you should be able to access them as soon as they are available even if that's without an appointment to discuss findings.

@Yukka Thanks lovely-seems I may be following your pattern-flashing smiley today. Now to try and get oh in the mood!

@Lilimum6 that really sounds bad from epau...when you rang did you speak to one of the lead nurses for the unit? I think I'd try ringing again and speaking to the epau leads or the ones trained in counselling/bereavement (I can send you their names for our unit if you want). It's a hard enough thing to go through without being left hanging as it were. In terms of trying again...I'd find it very hard not to too, but maybe your body just needs a rest. You've been through so much in such a short space of time. Maybe a month off will give you time to heal a bit and give your body time to recover. Hugs xxx

@Lilimum6 my last miscarriage was 18th October. I saw my GP on 2nd November who agreed to refer me. On 3rd November I got a letter from RMC emailed to me with an appointment date of 15th January. It said they wouldn't see me until I'd had 2 cycles post mc, hence jan date. On 15th jan I had a scan, consultation and bloods, then back for repeat bloods on 27th February, and see doctor for results on 2nd April. They have been clear that I should be using contraception until 27th Feb at

Sorry fat fingers. Basically don't get pregnant until we've given you results and a treatment or you go back to ground zero. I just decided I didn't want to make it any longer than it needed to be.
It is a long weight but I don't think mentally or physically I would have coped with another mc. Like you 2 of mine were back to back.

Good luck with your journey you can only do what's right for you xx

Morning ladies, a little late...

Age 30
TTC #1
1 MMC at 12 weeks in March 18
1 NMC at 7 weeks in July 18

Private tests showed high androgen levels and a heart shaped uterus. Now on metformin and due to have a hysteroscopy this month to cut some tissue away from the dip.

Sorry I haven't been around much. I was fertile this week and although my DH promised we could try, anxiety got the better of him ☹️ I tried so hard not to show that I was sad and annoyed so that we could keep trying each day but by my peak day he didn't want to hear about it. I could see the pain in his eyes that he genuinely wanted to try for me but he couldn't deal with his anxiety.

I've got my hysteroscopy right when I'm fertile this month and it says no sex for a week so we definitely won't be trying again until end of March. I'm so scared my DH won't be up for it then either. I can't keep going on like this. My second due date is approaching and I feel so lost.

My counsellor says it shows what a good man he is because he worries about bringing children into this world - giving them our faulty genes and being an anxious parent who can't always control his brain. I told him what my counsellor said but it didn't make him feel good, he just said I can't be telling her the truth about how much of a bad husband he is. I've tried asking him to get help or to consider marriage counselling so that he doesn't have to talk alone but that was a big fat no.

So I will probably just pop in and out between now and March. I don't want to be getting my hopes up for the one millionth time that we're back on the TTC bus!

How are you this morning @frillyfarmer? X

Brown spotting again this morning but the back ache has gone. I'm meant to be calling EPU to arrange a scan anyway, not sure whether to call them today in light of the bleeding. I literally have no idea what to think anymore, my head has gone to shit!

@frillyfarmer brown spotting isn’t necessarily a bad sign as it’s old blood coming out rather than an active bleed. Good if pain has gone too. Some epu’s only open mon to fri but I would phone and find out today. Deff get appt ASAP x

@fnej01 thanks hun that makes sense. I admire your strength that is a long wait. I hope that you get some answers hun and it leads to your little 🌈 baby x

@Lilimum6 right back at you. It's such a tough journey but I hope we all get our 🌈 babies. Can you imagine how spoilt these children are going to be. X

@frillyfarmer how are you hun did you speak to epu?

Hi everyone, thought I’d stick my head back in. I was on here for a bit after a MMC at 10 weeks in July, stopped posting as felt a bit like MC/TTC thoughts were taking over my life and it didn’t feel very healthy. Had a BFP a couple of weeks ago but started bleeding on Thursday. Haven’t been to EPU yet as not sure there’s much point while nature is doing its thing.

Does anyone know if miscarriages are hereditary sometimes? My mum has three. I didn’t look into it last time (wrote it off as bad luck) but starting to wonder now.

*had not has, about my mum...

@Lilimum6 thanks for asking. I'm ok, still spotting, EPU can't scan me without a GP referral, so by the time we're done it will be the middle of next week... I'm still spotting.

I managed to take my mind off things by scraping my new car 👌🏼 Honestly, I'm usually such a level headed person but my anxiety is just through the roof this weekend.

@Lilimum6 do you GP have a triage service? When I was confused about my ectopic I just asked to be put on the triage list for the doctor to call back and asked him to talk me through my notes because I didn't understand what had happened at EPU and he was amazing.

It's so awful that they dealt with things so badly. Also I just don't think it's appropriate for pregnant nurses to be working in EPU dealing with pregnancy losses - it's too much.

Ok very random question...TTC and chicken pox!

Last Sunday I went to see my friends and their kids, including their 4 week old daughter. I had lots of lovely cuddles...but yesterday she started with chicken pox!

My mom can't remember if I had it as a child so I've no idea if I'm immune and obv we are TTC (cd10 and at high fertility expecting to ovulate weds/thurs). Now beginning to worry that if we do conceive and I've caught it it will do damage...anyone have any experience? Should I be worried? Xxx