Yammed if you do, Yammed if you dont

[Owlpatrol]

Yammers thread 10!

Yammer rules:

A safe place for those of you who have been trying to conceive for 6+ months and even yams aren’t helping. Come and have a good ol’ bitch and a moan without judgement. Please read the rules before posting!

The Yam Commandments are as follows;

• Thou shalt not arrive one day and post BFP next day

• Thou shalt not give advice to others when TTC for one month only

• Thou shalt not participate in one-up-manship and realise TTC is shit for everyone in different ways

• Thou shall allow posters to be fucked off with the world and everything in it at regular points in the month

• Thou shalt not be offended by strong language

• Thou shalt not tell everyone to eat yams

• Thou shall accept being called a muppet for testing at 7dpo at 9pm at night

• Thou shalt not symptom spot during the two week wait and must be prepared for a telling off if you do so.

-Thou shalt not post pictures of positive pregnancy tests. We will be delighted to hear about it but no photos, please and thank you

@Aph413 Congrats! My friend, who has had two children, said that walking was great for her when she was pregnant- it kept her active without being too strenuous.

I am 6dpo and cannot believe how chill I've been this cycle. Maybe because I've had some other things on my mind, maybe because I've recently applied for two exciting job opportunities (both fixed term so not ideal but can't feel like I'm putting my life on hold at this point). Maybe also because we are the point of fertility testing now- dp has SA next week and if my period arrives, I'll be getting blood tests done. So this cycle almost feels like no big deal, a bit of a stopgap until we get to find out if anything is wrong. Maybe also because I suddenly got a yeast infection (sorry if tmi) and am too distracted by that to obsess over possible symptoms. I might have possibly googled 'thrush early sign of pregnancy' though

I don't really know how it happened. For months, people have told me to relax (not least dp) which I don't believe ever works on anyone. I haven't consciously tried to relax. Part of me wonders if I'm losing hope but I do still really want it to happen. Perhaps I've just become a bit exhausted by the emotional roller coaster of it all and am resigned to being defensively pessimistic. Anyway its a weird feeling. I almost forgot to take bbt today, that's how relaxed I am. And I did not bother with opk's or really even checking cm, just dtd every other day until bbt confirmed ov.

Sorry for rambling, just trying to understand my own feelings. Anyone else suddenly found themselves feeling more relaxed about things without really trying?

@Aph413 understandable but try and enjoy every second of it xxx

@goldflakepaint me!! Bearing in mind we 'stopped trying', I literally just changed my mind the other day because I'm randomly feeling super positive? I'm not temping or using OPKs or anything - because atm I feel like I don't need them and I'm just going to see how this goes.... where has the old cupcakes gone 😂

@Aph413 I'm actually trying to force myself to relax. I am a natural stresshead! Booking in for acupuncture, trying to walk/cycle more, using a relaxation app..... I don't know if any of this will help on the conception front, but it can't hurt on the heart health/blood pressure front!

Sorry, that was aimed at @goldflakepaint !

@Aph413 congrats!

@goldflakepaint I sometimes have the odd month where it's not the first thing on my mind/google search history. Also I had thrush with my little boy before I knew I was pregnant so fingers crossed for you.
Glad you feeling posative @cupcakesandglitter I'm trying really hard not to convince myself I'm pregnant again this cycle cause it's getting rediculous 😂.
How's things going @BGDino when's your test date again ?
Also did @Owlpatrol decide to hit pause on ttc? I'm so forgetful x

Hi ladies I'm still here but had my af finish last week and so ttcing again this week. I'm also trying to calorie count and shed a few pounds like @Aph413 so hoping this could be a good sign! Congrats!

Baby bomb. I'm crying myself to sleep tonight.

Ahhh noo @JustLikeTheySaid are you ok?
Glad your still around @Owlpatrol hope the dieting helps x

@JustLikeTheySaid sending hugs. That sucks.

@impatientmammy test is next Friday 22/3 which is 5 days and 13 hours away... not that I’m counting

Literally cannot stop crying today. Cried myself to sleep last night and woke up crying this morning.

I think I might need to take a break from trying. But I need to redo my CD21 results as I was one day out, and I want to push to be referred for an internal and maybe a HyCoSy to check there is nothing wrong with my tubes. I feel like my anxiety might be less if I know there are no major issues (other than husband's low morphology) but I don't know if I can keep trying and failing whilst everyone else gets pregnant.

Sending big hugs @JustLikeTheySaid be kind to yourself. I hope your doctors can get the testing arranged for you.

No temp rise here and it's been 48 hours since the last positive OPK. So that's twice this cycle my body has tried and failed to ovulate. Wish my ovaries would sort themselves out.

Blood test has been moved forward to Thursday 21/3. I honestly don’t know how I’m going to deal with it being negative.

@JustLikeTheySaid awww sending hugs, I took a month "off" and tried to focus on other things, it sort of worked. I'm back "trying" his month and just finishing fw so lets see!

Hope you're feeling better @JustLikeTheySaid XX

Sorry if I've missed it @BGDino what's your bloods for? Xx

Sorry to hear that @NoseringGirl - have you had anything since? Xx

@BGDino how come they've moved it forward? At least it's less time to wait!

@cupcakesandglitter nope, I've continued doing OPKs and they've not faded as quickly as they usually do after a positive but are still negative. Temps still low. Feeling pretty miserable today! How's you?

Oh man @NoseringGirl hopefully it means your body is gearing back up again - I haven't always had luck with OPKs though because I feel like I'm deciphering them, sorry I can't be more helpful 😂 I'm okay thanks - still feeling pretty positive, but not about this cycle 😂😂 feeling massively hungry and tired but I'm only CD19 so it's not symptom spotting 😂 AF turned up for me on CD23 last cycle, so I reckon she could turn up anytime in the next two weeks 🤷🏻‍♀️

Feeling so fed up today. AF due in 2 days and I'm not sure if I can cope with another BFN. Had a tough day at work, feeling irrationally emotional and just came home and ate so much rubbish. Gahhhh. I think I'm gonna go to bed soon, just so today is over. Hopefully wake up feeling better tomorrow 🙈

Sorry to bring the mood down. It's just so tough when you struggle to conceive and it feels like everyone around you is pregnant.

@cupcakesandglitter I can really relate to that feeling of wondering where the control freak/neurotic me has gone. Getting to the end of the tww and not endlessly scrutinising my temps/cm/symptoms. I do think it's largely because I've convinced myself that there is no point- I have become excited in the tww before and have often looked at mum's on tv or out in the world with a sense of kinship- 'that will be me soon'. But I was surrounded by kids last weekend when at a friend's birthday and all I felt after a while was loss. That's the negative side to becoming relaxed for me, anyway- I think there is a loss of hope.

@NotMaryWhitehouse Totally agree about doing things that helps you relax for its own sake beyond the ttc fun! Would be interested to hear about your acupuncture experience, considering it myself if nothing happens in a few months.

@JustLikeTheySaid Sorry to hear, I can relate to this. Despite feeling quite relaxed recently, over the weekend, I was surrounded by kids. DP and I were literally the only people our age there without kids- we joked about giving people updates about our dog instead. After a while, it became too much for me and we just had to leave early as I was close to tears and just needed to not be there. I think speaking up to express what we need and recognising the validity of our feelings is really important. I hope you feel better and are looking after yourself. It's a hard thing to go through and you should absolutely do whatever helps- including pushing for those test results if you feel that would help resolve some of the anxiety.

@todaywasafairytale Sending hugs, I am at about the same point in cycle (af due on Friday) and not feeling hopeful at all. I have definately been doing the 'eat your feelings' thing recently as well as noticing all the people around me who are pregnant (literally two on my street alone- the fucking street of fercundity). Hope you feel better tomorrow.

@goldflakepaint I shall report back

@NoseringGirl so I can pick up more progesterone (that I won’t need if I’m not pregnant ).

Don’t you just hate the feeling of not being able to control anything???!!!

I’m sure I’m not pregnant because I don’t have any symptoms and I did this time last time. Everything is up in the air because I had HCG trigger and luteal support and am still taking progesterone so I daren’t take a home test in case I get an inaccurate result. But I don’t know how I’ll cope when I find out for sure I’m not. I can’t let go of the hope. Cross all your crossables for me please.

@BGDino crossing everything for you!!

@NotMaryWhitehouse oooh I'd be interested to hear too, it's something I've also considered.

So I stupidly took a FRER this morning and ofc it was BFN. Trying to console myself by reminding myself I'm only 9 or 10DPO. AF due Wednesday or Thursday so if it's still not here I'll try and hold off testing until Friday. HATEEE TWW!

@goldflakepaint it's so tough isn't it? TTC makes you hyper aware of everything and hyper sensitive too.

Okay, no more chocolate todaywasafairytale ... step away from the creme eggs ...