ttc after MC July 2007 - anybody out there?

[popsy76]

Hi ladies, our old thread is full and now I can't find anyone
I have posted here and on bereavement thread with same title - come join me if you find this

Oh Ladylush you must be angry. Will they fast track it if it was their fault ? What time scale you looking at now ?

I didn't mean to turn today into a feel sorry for Wheely day - am feeling most . Am just in that beginning of cycle phase when I feel most down in dumps - in a few days time (maybe even by tomorrow) I'll be in the 'its another chance' phase and feeling hopeful again. Thanks for all the kind messages though - but I know we're all in this together and we're all having a shit time.

Floss - well done your dh for managing to perform in such circumstances. I think I won't tell DH any of these stories after all !

Hope you're feeling all relaxed from your reflexology pops.

Right off to buck my ideas up.... will be around mumsnet generally so will probably not manage to stay away.

Hey Wheely, thanks for the info. I am really sorry you are going through all that but you know, I bet once you take "a break" from thinking about ttc all the time, you'll get PG. Just look at Julia Roberts! She says as soon as she stopped taking temps etc she fell PG even though she'd been told it would never happen naturally.

My sis had been told it was unlikely she'd fall PG naturally. As soona s she booked her wedding and stopped ttc. she got PG!

I think the key is to tell yourself you are not bothered about ttc anymore. Enjoy your LO and keep having sex and before you know it, you'll be PG! I promise

...and when your next one does come along, you'll think "isn't that a nice age gap to have between kids."

Everything works out for the best in the end. Keep smiling.

You sound happier today nh - more back to your usual positive self?

LOL NH - you've actually hit the nail on the head - its the age gap I am most panicked about which i know is daft. You are quite right on the 'don't think about it' - I keep trying to persuade DH to book a skiing holiday for the new year but he thinks I'm quite mad as we could end up wasting a lot of money !!! Am planning to take horse riding up again when dd starts nursery in Sept so that might help !

Anyway, feeling better today - sorry for yesterday's wibble. Won't talk about myself anymore - am here now to talk rubbish (or lend an ear....)

Ellie - How you doing ? Has it all sunk in yet ? Any symptoms ??

Hey wheely - it hasn't really - am too petrified to think about it much. Have some symptoms now but it means am obsessively concentrating on them and am getting nothing done at work!

wheeley - I worry about the gap as well with DS/any DB we have also recieved the persona thanks ever so for sending it and the sticks

not got time to catch up properly. so hopefully will do end of the week once we have our internet back on and i'm not sat in the internet cafe with various other people.*

had my rescan today - tested neg yesterday so scan was all clear apparently I've got a 'thickening' of the lining getting things back to normal so not sure if that means I've OV'ed or not? who knows jsut playin it by ear for now. DH is away next week and PIL are down this week - DH has major you wouldn't do it if it was your parents issues which i'll have to work out lol. anyhow off for a quick look elsewhere as I've only got 10 mins left

Hi everyone,

Yes Ellie I am much more positive right now, I think it is because I am going to see the consultant tomorrow to find out why my periods are on holiday. It doesn't feel so desperate for some reason now. I am resigned to not being PG again for at least six months. If we are not PG by then I will think of Clomid etc cos by then it will be nearly a year since my mc.

But for now I am smiling and not thinking about ttc - although I still can't let 48 hours pass without jumping DH (well, if you are only going to ovulate once every 12 weeks, you haven't the luxury of thinking 'oh well, there's always next month!)

Baby dust and positive thoughts to everyone

Keep smiling. And remember...

Our greatest glory is not in never falling but in rising every time we fall

Best of luck tomorrow nh. Hope you get some answers/reassurance.

Wheely - please don't apologise for feeling shit! You are perfectly entitled to. I understand what you are saying about the age gap thing - I so wanted a 2-3 yr gap but now I will be lucky if it's even 4. Miscarriages are very time consuming - as is ttc and babies take so long to be born once they are conceived! It's so frustrating.

Hello everyone else

Hi Pip - have been wondering where you were and more importantly, how you are ? Am glad your scan was clear (IYSWIM) - at least you know the physical side is all over, no need for further intervention. Take care of yourself.

Good luck for today and thanks for the stirring words NH - Confucius I believe. You're absolutely right though - I shall tattoo that on my arm. Am off to see a friend today who has had a real tough time with this ttc malarky - 3-4 years trying including having to terminate a pg due to serious problems. They have always remained so calm and serene about it though and finally had their daughter in June. I hold them up as my inspiration !

Hang on in there Ellie - each day is a step closer. Are you getting an early scan ?

Hi Ladylush - how old is your ds ? I try and tell myself, on the age gap thing, that when dc2 finally comes along it will be so much easier having a bigger gap (dd will be at nursery/school/university ) and I'll be able to give as much time to dc2 as I did to dd and do all the same classes etc that wouldn't have probably been possible with a smaller gap. Obviously thats what I tell myself but sometimes I don't listen !

Hey wheely - yes am going to see doc today and hopefully she will book me in for a scan at 7 weeks or something. If she doesn't I'll be a nervous wreck, so she'd better for everyone around me!

Best of luck with your consultant today nh x

Ladylush- you are so right. Mc very time consuming.

Morning everyone. Went back to work yesterday and felt pretty chirpy about it, for the first half hour, then one of the team came into my office and resigned! And then we had DS's childminder call at 6.30 this morning to say her son is ill and she can't have DS today so DH and I have done a bit of frantic rearranging so we've each got him for half of today. Blimey, if it's this complicated with one, what might it be like with two?!

I know what everyone means about the age gap thing - if this last baby had stuck, there would have been 2 years 3 months between the two but now we'll be lucky if it's less than 3. I know there are advantages to a biggish gap, but I'm going to have forgotten the broken nights etc and it'll all come as a huge shock again!

oh Rachel - don't say that, I'd almost convinced myself about the age gap thing . I kind of like to think by the time we get to the sleepless nights, we'll be so relieved to be there we won't care ().

Good luck at the doctors Ellie - demand a scan (are you just bog standard nhs in Jersey or is it a bit different ?)

Hi Floss !!

that's my worries rach - with this last one DS would have been just 2 now it's highly unlikely he'll beunder 3 whilst in a way it's good - no double buggy etc and beleive me i'm so thankful to have him I wanted a 2 year gap still not to worry it's done now iycwim. glad you were ok back at work - how are you feelin within your self?

ellie big congrats to you. hope everything goes smoothly for you.

nh - rising again after falling is so true. when's your dr's apt? hope it all goes well for then thou.

wheely - we're doing ok here thanks - still need to see the dr thou, I feel sick pretty much 24/7 unless i'm eating, constantly tired, snappy with everyone incl ds and have started having dizzy spells so hopefully going on tues to see her. hoping it's nothing serious. re the sperm thingy I was told with DH's it had to be there within half an hour - good job we lived about 5 mins away. they gave him a little pot. he was bothered about doing it but that was soon put to rest by me! lol. think his only took about a week to come thru I rang the dr's and the receptionist said dr has written all is fine so that was that.

good luck to all those on the 2ww or due any time soon. hope we have some mroe BFPS.

managed to convince DH last night! lol. made a school boy error thou and left the baby moniter on in the front room (where PIL are sleeping) mega! lol. althou they've not said anything but then again the sky went funny last night and MIL said this am 'well I wasn't about to shout up the stairs' we were v quiet thou. also found out yesterday that out EPU won't scan me next time early as 'they don't do that' and 'if everyone had it etc etc' and I'm like but yes i've had 3 now and she was basically saying I don't care - so will be looking into private ones hopefully soon def back in the sadle.

anyhow off back to bed after DS waking at 4.50 and not going back to sleep - blinking child!

ellie wow wow wow wow!!!

Re age gap - the smallest we're going to have now is 5 years on the dot (if i got pg this month wihich is unlikely cos we've not put a lot of effort into it) - but then again we never wanted a small one, it's just now that the ideal gap is passed (for us it was 4 and a half years, which is what my first pg/m/c would have been) i am getting more and more stressed by the day.

Sorry i've not even been lurking but we've been down at my parents' and their dial up isn't working... Also even before that, with dd off it's been much harder to get on the computer!!!!

is the cake fest still on 31st or has it moved????????

nce i'm back properly (flying visit home agin to have dd's new carpet fitted) tomorrow/sat i'll be on more. honest.

miss everyone though, and when i'm feeling crap i really notice not being able to come on here....

No we have our own health service over here and you can normally get things pretty quickly which is good, so fingers crossed.

Hi Wheely - my ds was 3 at end of June. Timing wise the middle m/c would've been perfect had bean lived as there would've been a 3 yr gap. I know some women get annoyed when we talk about age gaps etc as they think a baby is enough and trying to plan them to arrive at a certain time is trivial by comparison BUT how can we help how we feel? Of course I will be ecstatic when/if another lo arrives but it's just one of those things that mothers in particular give a lot of thought to imo.

Pipsqueake - your epu sounds pants. What a charming woman IMO a primary function of epus should be to provide reassurance scans esp for women with recurrent m/c. Where do you live? Have you investigated whether there are any walk-in epus in your area so that you don't have to go private?

Hi Pip, I'm doing OK thanks, helped I'm sure by the fact that physically I seemed to have bounced back. Obviously still a bit emotional though - caught 5 minutes of Holby City the other day and found myself in floods of tears. Not quite sure what that was about!

Your EPU sounds rubbish - could you get your GP to refer you next time?

Hello wheely (floss waves arm frantically)- how's tricks?

Hallo all (waves arm more frantically)

Cake fest still on for 31st.....lets say 3pm so less time to stuff our faces until others (ronshar?) can make it!!! To save working out how the hell we are going to recognise each other in real life, I will post on the day to tell you what Iam wearing, then all you have to do is find me (if in doubt look for the blonde wearing pink glasses stuffing her face!!!)

not sure about the epu/dr referal - will talk to her - intresting thou some epu's are walk in ones - ours is dr referal only. I was explaining it to DH thou (not that he took much convinceing) but i'd rather know straight away if that makes sence than leave it like this time when i'd lost most of my symptoms and started to bleed only to find the baby had died a week b4.

rach - think the hormones are to blame there! lol. unfortunatly it seems to be physically everything's ok but as you say it's the emotional side that goes with the m/c isn't it?

ellie hope the dr gets things sorted out quickly.

anyhow best do some dinner am childless and DH's less today and so far have MN'etterd for 3 hours and had a bath for an hour! lol. must drag myself away from the comp and do something!

good luck at the docs nh let us know how you get on

Morning ladies ITS FRIDAAAAAAAAAAAAYYYYY!
Feeling super chirpy as my day working at the zoo has been cancelled so i feel like i have a free day
Also feeling chirpy cos I feel like I am finally feeling back to the old popsy again - there was a time when i thought I could never be back to that again - yes I have experienced a huge amount and been through a really shit time but I feel so much more "normal" again...dare I say positive
Anyhoo I actually had a brief moment yesterday when I thought god i hope i don't get pregnant again soon cos it has taken me 5 months to get my mind and body back and getting PG would throw everything up in the air again....
I think this is probably the best state of mind for me to be in until it does finally happen - I actually feel present in my life rather than half-dreaming daze that I have been in since the MC
Well am bound to have another slump again as this has always been a roller coaster - just wanted to share these thoughts with you all as I am being positive for once
Have a fab day everyone - nh any news from the specialist?
xxxxx

Popsy - glad you are feeling so chirpy