Over 40 ttc - summer baby dust for me!

[Orchid222]

Ladies here's our new thread!

I'm so sorry Ali! :(
Mimosa- sorry you're feeling so down. I think it's too early to accept defeat, didn't Cleo say she went through something similar and then everything got rebalanced and she got a bfp? There must be supplements you can take to help (though unfortunately I don't know which), please don't give up yet! Perhaps TCM would do the trick, have you tried that? Thinking of you xx

CritterTamer can get preg just not sticking.. might try after this cycle..

I know how you feel Mimosa. Crap cycles make me feel crap just because I feel so low. Let your body reset itself and your cycle will come back. This isn’t the end. Just give it a few weeks.

I guess it’s an anovulatory cycle and AF will come at some point and hopefully the next one will be ok.

So sorry Alibaba2 😞
Hobbes39 I love stories like this and littlemimosa I'm so sorry you are having a really rough cycle... I too had friends who had babies at 44 naturally one actively ttc one a surprise.. but we also have cat Deeley having another in early 40's and Christine Lampard ( not sure her age) but it can happen and well all carry hope for all of us.. sending big hugs and love to all of you lush ladies 💕💕

Ali sorry it didn't work out, so disappointing.
Mimosa it's so tough but please don't give up. What cd are you on now? I think I made it to about cd 45 or so before af arrived after my annovulatory cycle, just be prepared that as it won't be a normal af it may be odd too, but again, it may not as we are all different, but what I can say is its not the end. Having the odd annovulatory cycle at our age is completely normal, but it is just a hiccup. Our cycles don't just suddenly stop. It's a long drawn out wind down process, so they will come back.
Maybe TCM may help, as orchid suggested.
I totally get how you are feeling though. It's shit. Fingers crossed for a speedy return of af.

I love the stories of older people having babies it does give me hope! Interestingly 42 seems to be a very common age to get pregnant, as 3 people I know in real life had babies at 42 recenly, and watching loose women yesterday (I know, what a saddo) there was a pannel of 4 ladies, 2 of those had their babies at 42 and one was wanting another at 44.

I personally don’t believe in pee sticks anymore so I’ll just keep thinking positive thoughts.

Those suggesting TCM how did you find it? I tried for a short while but it gave me a very upset stomach - i basically had the runs every time I took them 🙈, so I stopped after giving them a go for 3 weeks in total (2 weeks then stopped to check it was that causing the issue - it was - stared again after stomach recovered but the runs started again!)
I don't know if they just got my prescription wrong but it really or me off! I did find acupuncture good for reducing period pain, but didn't work for fertility mind you 🙁.
One thing I do think helped was ubiquinol - my last IVF cycle was the most successful - more eggs collected, more embryos survived and 2 BFPs, albeit unsuccessful in the end. The only thing I changed from previous cycles was I took ubiquinol in plenty time before hand, so I'm keeping that up as a do believe that improved things... TCM tho, not so much!

Karigan.. Same here i don't bother with them any more either.
You wrote ..'Yeah I did s lot of googling at in many cases the hcg levels can still be fine for a good pregnancy and yet too low to show for several weeks past'..
which is what happened to me! And i didnt know i was preg until i went to the gp after 11 or 12 weeks and had a blood test and scan!! I was 40 and turned 41 3 months after ds was born. But sadly no sniff of a bfp since ( we tried half-heartedly since my periods came back after 1 year after giving birth)
So yes i'm thinking myself time is up too although i haven't really tried hard enough up to now as we've only just been in a secure enough position to have a baby.

hi everyone, I'm 45 and ttc. I've found a really interesting link which has really helped with the emotional side of this - www.fertileheart.com
The lady who runs it completely inspirational. Hope you find it useful too. She basically says we are all so much more fertile than we think we are - definitely worth a look.x

Hobbes, TCM worked for me. I had a high FSH blood test (18.4) so decided to try TCM. 6 weeks later I got my bfp. Weather it was the TCM or coincidence I don't know but I'm planning to start again in September.

Welcome Eloisa, thanks for the link. Interesting stuff

Welcome Eloisa, thanks for the link, i've just spent a bit of time looking around the website and it spoke to me and where I am. Do you have any DC already? how long have you been ttc?

Thanks everyone for your support and kind words. It honestly does help and it's nice to be able to come on and moan with people who understand. Just feeling lost really and in pain. But I'm trying to feel the pain for once and not run away from it. I've realised that i've been carrying around a lot of guilt about wanting another DC. I feel like I SHOULD be grateful for what i've got and that the longing for another baby is me being selfish. I often feel like if my family and friends knew we were ttc #3 that they'd think I was crazy and ungrateful, especially at 42. I have one other friend same age who is ttc too and i've heard other friends saying things like 'oh she's mad, why would she want a third?' I've even got my mum's voice in my head saying 'don't have anymore, they're too much hard work'.!! All that emotional cr@p and my cycles going weird plus hot flashes has just come to a head. On the positive side, i've ditched a lot of the supplements and am going to try to trust my body a bit more. I'm eating a bit more and am doing some nice calming YogaYin:)

Cleo - I'm CD32. I've looked back at my app and the last time i had an annovulatory cycle it lasted 42 days so really similar to you.

Welcome Eloisa and thank you for the link!

Hobbes-similar to Cleo, TCM seemed to work for me. I did acupuncture for about 2.5 months before moving to a chinese clinic and doing acupuncture, moxibustion and herbs for nearly 3 months. A few days after stopping that I got my bfp. It wasn't meant to be but it was a lot more than what I got in the previous 12 cycles.

Cleo-I think I'm in a funny place like you not too long ago, feeling positive and hopeful about increased fertility after a mc but I know I'll be crushed in about 2 weeks when AF arrives...I hate this emotional roller coaster!

Welcome to the group Eloisa 😊 Thats an interesting website - ive never heard of that lady before.

I hope things look up for you soon Littlemimosa - i always find Yoga Yin very helpful and calming too.
I’m feeling down about everything today too - just had the most incredible pain in that same spot on the right side of my uterus where all of the twinging, pulling and stabbing feelings have been going on for the past week. It was so bad it made me cry out loud in shock. I don’t know if the IVF had worked or not as I still haven’t tested, but I’m guessing that can’t be a good sign either way. There’s still a dull ache in that spot now an hour later.

Sitting in my garden watching the most beautiful butterfly in the flowers right now and trying really hard to hold on to some hope 😔

Critter-sorry the pain was so bad but where is your negativity coming from?! You have so many symptoms, your eggs were good, AF hasn't shown. Pregnancy does involve aches and pains so I say start getting used to them :)

Hi Orchid I’m not really sure where the negativity has come from today - just woke up this morning with this feeling it’s all over for some reason. Sore boobs are just coming and going now and felt so wet and uncomfortable that really thought AF had arrived just as I was leaving work - rushed home in tears to find just a load more watery stuff (sorry for TMI). Then this awful pain - I don’t know but just feels like pain that bad couldn’t be a positive thing.

Sorry for moaning - at home by myself with no one to confide in except my doggies!

Don't feel down critter, I had loads of aches and pains when I was pregnant with my first! We have everything crossed for you!

I had aches and pains too critter, and the wet feeling you described. I don't think you are by any means out. Keep hope.

Orchid - yes it truly is a rollercoaster, I think I have gone a bit more into reality mode this month and have less expectations, last month really was crushing!

Same! Critter I had a friend at work who already had two dc. Every time I had a pain or ache I'd panic and she'd smile and say it's fine normal and that everything would be ok so let me now tell you the same: it's fine and normal so try to relax and don't let the negative thoughts near you!

I think I'll be the same Cleo, crushed this cycle and realistic the next...this whole ttc thing sucks, it should be much easier and straightforward even at our age.

Thanks all 😊 I’m resolving (again) to keep my chin up and stay positive until AF shows. Did some meditation and had a nice cool shower and feeling better now. I’m going to go play golf in this gorgeous weather to relax and take my m8nd off this TWW torture!

Hope everybody else is enjoying the glorious weather and finding lovely things to do to take your mind off ttc 😁

Enjoy Critter while you can, soon you won't have much time to play golf! :)

When are you testing?

Anyone heard of or know about an 'endometrial scratch'? I've been asked if I want to take part in a study looking at whether it increases pregnancy rates in natural conception (as opposed to IVF). There are already studies saying it does increase success rates in IVF patients. I'd have a 50/50 chance of being chosen or going on the placebo arm of the study. I'm unsure about it cos i don't want to mess up my already delicate cycle but it is very tempting. Anyone any thoughts or experience?