40+ ttc: 2018 is full of bfp's!

[Orchid222]

Ladies, the old thread has finished, here's a new one.

Morning all! I thought it was an old wives tale about synchronised periods but I’m gonna join you ladies with AF - she arrived today. Dare I say it but I’m really happy as this is the 2nd cycle that’s been late and I was worrying that I’d hit menopause - also hopefully I’m now on my way to ovulation again 🙏🏻 Next we need synchronised BFPs. For all of you IVF ladies - I know it’s an immense thing and a big old gamble but there are loads of successes out there and there is far more of a control element to it, medical or not at least someone is actually making something happen. I’d love the chance to do it, but it’s not an option for me. Sending sunshine and love to you all my fertility sisters. XxX In God We Trust!!! X

Hi ladies. I havent been v active on here since miscarrying 6 weeks ago. I had a second bout of bleeding 4 weeks ago and still waiting on my proper af to arrive. Feeling hormonal and fat. I have grown by at least 1dress size since March due to comfort eating. Disgusted at myself but lack the motivation to change. Just want my mojo back, and a normal cycle so we can get started ttc again. We have tried this month and i've been testing for the past week- bfns which is not surprising as ive no idea what my body is doing.

Hi Orchid, sorry to hear that you’re struggling to get hubby on board with the IVF - I guess I’m really lucky in that regard - mine would also rather give it longer but he totally gets the biological clock thing and has been so supportive to the point of emptying out all his savings accounts to scrape up the £7k to pay for it. He says he would rather just do it than see me going through this heartbreak every month - guess I’m lucky I have him 😊

I have a treatment planning appointment for the IVF on Thursday so trying to use that to keep positive - it’s crap feeling so down in this gorgeous weather!

Mimosa sorry that the HSG also doesn’t seem to have helped you this month - was that done as a precursor to IVF like mine, or because you thought there was an issue?

Critter - ‘man up’ ha ha!

Orchid - you let it all out. You can’t be positive all the time. My positivity goes in waves. Obviously the worst time is just as AF arrives.

Oops posted too soon.

Critter - I had the HSG as part of fertility testing as referred by my gp. We won’t go down the IVF route but we wanted to check everything was working properly all the same.

Orchid - I know it’s easier said than done at our age but try not to see every month that passes as your fertility dropping off. Three months is nothing really. I only say this as I don’t want you to add stress to yourself! I’ve been trying a mantra recently ‘I’m fertile and have everything I need to have a baby’. It’s from Emma Cannon the fertility lady. I’m trying to convince myself into being 22 again

Minime - it’s good to hear from you but so sorry you’re struggling so much to get your body back to normal. You’ve been thru a lot so go easy on yourself. I can recommend Emma Cannons book ‘Fertile’. It has a section in just on recovering from miscarriage and is just generally a lovely encouraging book. I got it secondhand on Amazon and refer to it all the time. I’m not pregnant yet but my hormones have never been so balanced.

Thanks for the book recommendation @littlemimosa. Ill get it ordered. Think it might be useful! Having a weird day. I should be on CD1 today. Ive have poking and pinching in the lower abdomen. Ive had some slight brown cm which has now stopped. I checked the hpt i took this morning and there is the faintest pink line. It wasnt there this morning. Im fully aware its probably an evap. I took another this evening and its a definite bfn. Headachy and have a rotten taste in my mouth...me? Symptom spotting?? Not at all! I know af will raise her ugly head in the morning. Why do we let ourselves go there with the hope??

Minime - i'm right there with you! I'm CD33 today and AF is due anytime. Symptom spotting for fun here.... This is a long cycle for me but I know I ovulated late this month after my HSG so really i'm due AF tomorrow or Thursday. Sounds potentially promising thought for you! Fingers crossed hun.

PS you're welcome x

Thank mimosa. I'm trying not to think that each month my fertility is dropping off but the thought of those 3 months bringing me closer to 42 is scary!
Ha I'm right tgere with you! Cd31 and expecting AF tomorrow, Thurs at the latest. My leaving drinks at work are on Friday so I do hope I have a clear situation by then! But it is clear to me, I have no doubt AF will come as I have no symptoms whatsoever so can't even symptom spot for fun like you mimosa. Sigh.
I agree with mimosa minime- there might be something there! Your fertility should be increased after the mc so fingers crossed for you!

Critter- can you please share what you're told at your UVF appointment? I'll be very curious to hear. Are you going privately? I got the costs sent through by my local hospital today and will look at private clinics tomorrow. I'm dreading the whole process tbh but if that's the only way so be it.

So the big family weekend was ok in parts, parents dreadful and seeing my sis in law with 6 month bump was so hard, but am excited for them just jealous. I know I have kids but we so desperately want another one. I consoles myself with the fact that my boobs were so painful and tum a bit bloated but no cramps and some right sided twinges that ours was bedding down. Yesterday ( day 29) I had some spotting in the morning, not much and was after a bm then nothing all day.. no cramps, ache but no cramps and it does feel diff. So I thought I would be brave a buy a test. So this morning tested and bfn!!! Beyond gutted as I feel preg, my boobs have gone up a size and this month have been so full, hormonal , crying at the slightest thing and really hungry. Hubs is feeling frustrated as not letting him near at mo so after my test I though why not it will either bring on af or at least if I am an early OV er then prepared by clearing out the old sperm from the tubes ( his not mine) ready for next cycle..
I know until af shows up I'm not out for the count but felt so diff this month. M/C was 2 cycles ago and was only 5.5 weeks maybe it has played havoc with my cycle or maybe my body is just playing with me.. who knows.. just feel sad today feel blessed for what I do have but you get a little glimpse of what might be and it gives you hope. No going down the dr route as 45 and my dr last year just told me to relax.. 🤣🤣🤣🤦‍♀️ which I know of good advise so I stopped with temps and cervix checking in jan. We then had the m/c, I don't drink caffeine or fizzy drinks, pre natals and omega oils in the vit department, loads of fruit and veg walk kids to school everyday, swim once a week. Not sure really what more I can do but keep jumping on the hubs.. which never complains about except when it it ov time 🤦‍♀️..
sorry for rant I know there are others with more hurdles than me.. just trying to keep positive sucks today. X

I’m so sorry you’re feeling so down at the moment - there seems to be many of us feeling this way right now - it really sucks when our bodies play these tricks on us it feels so cruel! Still keeping my fingers crossed for you though there’s still hope until af shows up as you say 😊
@Orchid - I’ll definitely let you know what happens. Cost wise it’s going to cost £6300 for 3 cycles, plus the drugs are on top of that so waiting on those costs but somewhere between 7 and 8 thousand in total i guess 😔

Critter, may I ask where you live? That's great pricing! Mine came to £5,908 per cycle! Ok that includes drugs and freezing spare embryos and 1 year storage but even without that it's £4,445 per cycle. I'll definitely do 1 but don't know about 3, will have to see how we go. I already spent a fortune on TCM which didn't seem to help so will have to have a think.
How is everyone else doing? I had quite bad pain this morning so was sure AF would show up quickly but nothing so far and even though I have absolutely no symptoms that tiny glitter of hope is always there before cruel reality hits.
Chatbash-I think with all of your symptoms there's still a good chance for a bfp, maybe the test you did just didn't pick it up yet.

Orchid, I’m in South Wales and going to the CRGW which also has a Center in Bristol if that’s closer for you. They pride themselves on price matching and putting people before profit, but have great success rates better than the national average. The price does up significantly for a single cycle however, and is closer the the £4K mark which is the reason we are going for a 3 cycle package. They say that the third cycle is most likely to be successful.

Hi all.
Orchid I'm 42 in June and I'm only about to start trying (first FW will start this weekend - when my brother is coming to stay in my tiny terraced with tissue paper walls so that'll be interesting I never really thought much about my fertility and all of a sudden 42 seems like some big cliff-face... Wishing you luck with the IVF though. x

Chat glad you made it through the weekend, but sorry to hear about the BFN. But like you said you're not out for the count yet? Fingers crossed for you. x

Nope af arrived... 😞😞😞 although yes it does seem weird we are all getting af at same time
Onwards and upwards.. hubs and I haven't been using contraception for last few years.. and we not going to do anything to change that.. we keeping trying.. and trying to have some fun.. af is still regular as clockwork... while there's a period there is still a chance.. 💕💕💕

Sorry Chatbash about AF! I guess I'll be get next victim just waiting but not even testing as I see no point with no symptoms at all.
Stars- good luck dtd on the weekend with your brother nearby lol. As for the big cliff-face, according to the doc at the fertility clinic it happens at 40. When I said it's crazy that I got pregnant 1st time trying at 38 yet at 40 it just wouldn't happen he said there's a world of difference between 38 and 40...let's hope he was wrong and even though it might take longer we're still as fertile at 41 as some of the younger ladies.

Chat i can relate to how youre feeling. We are trying for DC1 and im 6 weeks post mc awaiting my first 'proper' cycle to finish/start. I had v little brown spotting yesterday and its become heavier today, still have no real af pains but have light headness and feel spaced out. Bfns this morning and afternoon after a faint bfp yesterday so suspect af is imminent. Its just a weird way to start but guess thats due to the mc. As much as id love to be pregnant now, i wont be too disappointed as i will feel 'reset' and ready to ttc again. Debating whether to take soy iso or just let this cycle run naturally. I feel the pressure of time as im now 41.

As for the big cliff-face, according to the doc at the fertility clinic it happens at 40
Ah...

Sorry to hear that Chat - yeah I'm telling myself regular periods are good which is why I was freaked out about my random long cycle last month.

Minime hope everything settles down soon x

Stars- just to be clear, that's his opinion. My grandmother got pregnant with her last child at 44 completely by accident and that fact is what I'm going by :)

Hi all. Everyone is different. For all you early 40’s ladies, I got preg at 39/40 and 41 all within 2 months of trying ... less success from 41-43 but actually I’m convinced it’s because I don’t have enough sex. Zita West said 3 times a week MINIMUM!! X

Critter that IVF price is a bargain!! Orchid might be worth checking them out.. in regards to the Pro-Ceive supps - checked them out - they are pricey - £50 for 30 tabs.. anyone find a cheaper deal, I’m brassic after my £600 spent on TCM with bugger all success... ☹️

Re clomid privately @dee - I did this last year ... I felt very peculiar.. including pretty sick but am toying with giving it another go... although part of me says don’t mess around unsupervised.. 😚

@keep i took metformin as well...I think it works as I NEVER felt myself ovulated and this time is like i could feel everything...no imagining..for real i was excited...I am just waiting to see if I hit the jackpot...dont know what symptoms to look for...ov'ed cd13 and i am 3 dpo..the only sign i have is sore breast and nipples...did not get that last month, but normally have sore breast before af...but she is not due for 15 days...i will try to be patient(not)...gl ladies who are on this journey

Faith- I hear you, my TCM was ridiculously expensive and I ended up spending a LOT of money so forking out another £6k for 1 IVF cycle will be a challenge.
Critter, I'll ask if my local hospital offers a discount for 3 cycles rather than 1. They didn't mention it but worth asking.