TTC after recurrent miscarriage thread 2 - we're not giving up

[UnicornsandRainbows1]

Shiny new thread! :)

@paranormalbouquet
April I think. So basically this is final ditch cycle.

So sorry you didn't get your weekend away @paranormalbouquet, so disappointing. When can you reschedule? How are you feeling now? Good news on the scan and bloods, it's the oddest feeling isn't it, and I totally know what you mean about buying condoms! I got thrush after my MVA which put a halt to proceedings getting back on track, even though I had no symptoms, but we then had a month of safe sex and it felt really weird, mentally.

You're having a shit time time @beanhunter, so sorry. How do you feel about your IVF cycle? And will you get your scan this week? I hope it's not too much longer.

Welcome @LimpLettice so sorry for your losses. That's awful about your parents, but I can relate to the behaviour as my PIL are the most deranged and toxic people I have ever met and they weren't even invited to ours but still did their best to try and ruin it. They didn't succeed and it was a wonderful day. It must be really painful and sad, I do feel for you.

I'm under an RMC if you have any questions I can help with

Fx for you @Bex2311 have you had more results back?

Glad it was another productive appointment @Miami81, it sounds like you have a good team around you, I hope they keep being available and helpful. What is the plan? Your tests from the RMC were all clear weren't they - are there things they should have tested for?

When will the clotting bloods be back? The variation in the time it takes to get results is crazy. My second HCG one was with me about 3 hours after they took the blood, and I was healthy so it was hardly an emergency. Last time I was in a&e in agony it took way longer, when it was!

Hi @AnneLovesGilbert
On the clotting thing, my consultant is now of the opinion that there may be a clotting thing that there isn't a test for yet, so they are just going to proceed like I have one anyway.
Then when I saw the rheumatologist in the afternoon she redid a load of bloods as the nhs hadn't actually said what they have checked for so she wanted to be absolutely certain that all the clotting ones have been checked for.
I don't expect something to come back on those, I think she was just being thorough.
So now we are waiting for an MRI and hysteroscopy to check womb shape.
I don't know whether I want bicornuate - therefore nothing they can do and we can start trying again. Or if I want them to say that it's a definite septum and we have to wait for ages.
Anyway so lots of waiting here.
How are you? Do you have a date for your six week scan? I hope the injections etc are going ok.

@AnneLovesGilbert I’m fine, was a bit sad over the weekend as felt I was ovulating (can usually tell without opks) and I’ve had my usual HR rise this morning confirming my suspicions. On one hand I’m glad my body seems to be working but feels strange not to try!

@beanhunter I hope you get your scan ASAP and IVF can proceed as planned. I’m sure this is a very difficult stressful time. My colleague with same due date as I had is an IVF pregnancy and all is going very well for her after a rough few years.

@Miami81 there seems to be a split in clinics/doctors with regards to treating empirically with anticlotting drugs or not (having surveyed my gynae friends!). Hopefully it does the trick for you. As I’ve had a healthy pregnancy before everyone’s gut feeling is that adhesions are my problem not clotting. (At least the 2 5-6 week losses are; the MMC was possibly just bad luck as implanted away from adhesions). I may just have to that a good one implants away from adhesions eventually. But obviously that’s just based on opinions; will be keen to hear what RMC think.

Do you have dates for MRI yet? The hospital I work in often have cancellations- if you can make short notice appointments they may fit you in sooner.

@Paranormalbouquet
Oh my word, I get the sadness. I have been almost hysterical every month when I know I am ovulating. I'm like, there we go another perfectly healthy egg (probably) and it's just wasted while we fanny around waiting to try and figure out what is happening. It makes me so upset and angry and sad all at the same time. I am not certain how much more waiting my mental health can cope with.
No word on MRI yet. Jeepers it's frustrating. I don't even know who to phone to chase it up. I have a complaint in at the moment so hoping that speeds it along. Complaint is very much about emotional care and feeling like the NHS don't have the tools to help.
When are you getting your investigations do you think?

Would a clotting issue explain your two previous losses @Miami81?

The approach you're talking about sounds very similar to my RMC, if I've understood it properly.

My Consultant treats everyone who wants it with fragmin from conception irrespective of a clotting disorder diagnosis - exactly because he is so sure some people have an issue they can't yet diagnose and after 17 years of doing it he's sure it works. We shall see....

He also said whenever women he's treated with it finally get to give birth to a heathy take home baby, they ask him if it's because of the drugs, and he has to say he doesn't know. Modern medicine indeed.....

@Paranormalbouquet in the things you've heard, if there's an undiagnosable clotting issue that causes women to miscarry, which if treated means they can have a successful pregnancy, what sort of losses does it explain?

Eg my MMC was diagnosed at 12 weeks and it had stopped at about 9, so is that more or less likely to have been a clotting issue (when the placenta's meant to take over or something?) than my 4 or 5 week losses.

Jabbing is going fine thank you. I only have two bruises which took several days to appear and I have my technique sussed now so it doesn't hurt doing it. Feels good to be doing something different.

Booked in for RMC appointment afternoon of the 14th, so next Wednesday. She said they'll scan me then and I'll be 6+5.

Miami, If it's a septum, it will feel like ages to have the surgery and then recovering afterwards, but once it's gone, you'll know it can't ever be an issue again.

If it's bicornate, is there a higher risk of mc and is there anything they can do to reassure you, or is it a roll of the dice? I'm not sure which I'd choose tbh. In a way, something that can be solved is always better because once it's gone it's gone. But you've waited so long already you must be desperate to get going ttc again, I get that, and you want your chance to have another baby and another pregnancy. Sending love as it all fucking sucks and none of them are the choices any of us expected having to make.

Did you start acupuncture again?

Hi guys, find myself here unfortunately :( just off the back of my 3rd in a row now. Have good news though. They tested the fetal tissue and placenta and have informed me that I have a severe clotting issue and need 150mg of aspirin every day and no pregnacare. Sad to see some familiar faces on here, some of you may remember me as Crazyvaperlady.

Oh formerly crazyvaperlady I do remember you. I am so so sorry.
Obviously we are all pretty hot on the topic of clotting at the moment, why no pregnacare though? That's a new one on me.
Anne - both my early losses basically stopped at around 6 weeks, which is when my blood flow etc starts building the connections with the placental tissue. So if there is clotting tendencies it could be that.
BUT it could all be related to a septum as well, if the poor wee embryos keep implanting in the wrong bits.
Or it could be both. Nightmare

@annelovesgilbert and @paranormalbouquet - am basically tired of it’s all. I had 2 failed cycles prior to the most recent mc. All 4 of my conceptions have been spontaneous, 2 early losses, my mmc at 13/40 and my daughter. So on some level it seems pointless but time is against us.

Can I join again ladies, I also see some familiar names @Anne @Miami @CrazyVaperlady.

Still trying after 2 MC's , one Missed at 12 weeks and one early MC around 5 weeks which was March last year. Fast forward a year and I feel no further forward. My little boy was 5 in November and the age gap is just getting bigger and bigger :-(

I am now on clomid for PCOS and also started on Metformin this month. 3 more cycles on clomid then basically it's go it alone as i have caught naturally 3 times or IVF. Not sure how i feel about that. Currently on CD16 and still no positive OPK yet so feeling utterly shit especially as i have had a hycosy this month so my tubes have had a spring clean! The disappointment in failing to conceive every month for a year is actually more disheartening than the 2 MC...I still had hope then!

I am going to go back and have a read through the thread but its nice to see some familiar faces (In a Very Ironic Way!!) x

@AnneLovesGilbert my very non expert understanding is that it’s more a factor in later miscarriages but may also be a factor in some earlier ones as can affect uterine lining etc.

@Miami81- try ringing the diagnostic imaging dept- ask for MRI appointments or the MR secretary. They may or may not be helpful but worth a try. Otherwise contact the secretary of consultant you’ve seen. Or do both! I’m still waiting on appointments and getting frustrated but also feeling guilty as I know I don’t always find time to sort everything immediately either so trying to be patient. Also don’t think the RMC will find anything bar the adhesions I know about.

@FuckMyUterus I hope that aspirin works for you.

I know the answer to pregnacare question! It contains (or used to) vitamin K which can theoretically increase clotting risk. In reality I think you need higher doses to have an effect but best not take chances in this situation I suppose.

@AmyL88 I hear you on age gap- DD is nearly 4 and desperate for a sibling, I feel so guilty.

That's interesting about the Pregnacare. I'm still waiting on my referral to rm clinic here, and wondering when ovulation might kick in. Been doing clearblue opks, but the pink ones and I don't like them. I've had nothing but blanks but lots of ewcm at the weekend. This loss was later at 7 weeks than before but weekend would have been right on the 15 day mark as usual and as was after previous m/cs.

Paranormal my dd is 8, the gap is ridiculous! If there ever will be a gap of course

@LimpLettice did you have a negative test after miscarriage?

paranormal is absolutely spot on, pregnacare contains over 100% of your RDA of Vitamin K (theoretically to help prevent any minor bleeds and to also try and prevent haemophiliac babies) however if you already have a clotting issue, vitamin K will only make it much, much worse as it is the vitamin in the body mostly responsible for clotting.
miami81 I remember you and Im also very sad to see Annelovesgilbert here too 😔

amy sorry if you've been asked this already, but what CD are u starting your opks? I only ask as my friend has been trying for 3 years unsuccessfully, never got properly positive opks, tried clomid etc and nothing. She decided to temp from CD1 (on my advice) and turns out she ovulated CD7! Took her 3 cycles and she's now 18 weeks pregnant.

Paranormal they've been negative since not long after the sac passed which is heading for 3 weeks ago I think. I realise it's soon I just hate being in limbo. Although I'm also terrified I might fall again before I have a plan. Urk.

@LimpLettice it can take longer after later miscarriages to ovulate I think. After my early losses I ovulated very soon afterwards (earlier than usual) but this time it was 5 weeks after passing sac, 2.5 weeks after ERPC.

Paranormal I really hope it is sooner than 5 weeks, but I guess time will tell.

Uterus, that is both interesting and concerning. I have read a fair bit about aspirin for clotting issues in recurrent miscarriage but do take Pregnacare conception and am now wondering if that might have been contributing. Such a blinking mystery.

@LimpLettice I had retained products which delayed things. If nothing happens soon maybe contact your EPU?

Thank you but they did scan again and no retained products. Horrible phrase.

It is a horrible phrase; it’s all fairly horrible isn’t it.

Called hospital today to follow up on my referral to RMC and was told it wasn’t received and it wouldn’t be prioritised if sent again.

I know I’m impatient but it’s so frustrating. As a medic myself the admin in hospitals drives me nuts anyway so don’t know why I’m surprised- but these referrals were sent 7 weeks ago now. I’m just looking at the age gap between my daughter and any future babies growing and growing.

In the meantime I have a plan for cervix but really need basic miscarriage investigations done first.

Hi everyone. Hoping someone can give me advice. How do any of you get the strength to keep going? Not currently trying as I’m having investigations, but hope to join these boards again sometime. But after 4 miscarriages the thought of being pregnant terrifies me. I can’t imagine giving up but I also can’t imagine going through this again.

Ever since my last loss I’m stuck in a horrible depression I can’t lift and both options just seem awful. Can anyone offer me any advice here? Everything just seems so shitty. Thank you.

@CatsForgotPassword I'm probably not the best person to talk to at the moment as my mood is constantly up and down but I keep telling myself that the single best indicator of taking home a baby in future is having had previous spontaneous conception (regardless of outcome).

Secondly the stats for having a successful pregnancy even after several miscarriages remain in our favour (even though it doesn't comfort me when I'm in the unlucky end of the stats, it does help me to keep going).

But it's ok to need a break and to not know what you want exactly.

Have you had any counselling?

Sorry about the referral cock up @Paranormalbouquet, so frustrating and crap, especially that despite it being their fault they won't try and fast track you.

What's the cervix plan?

Any chance you'll get your weekend away rescheduled soon? Are you feeling fully healthy again? Hope you're doing alright x

Glad your scan was clear @LimpLettice Agreed, all the terminology is grim, doesn't' help at all. I really appreciated it in the EPU consenting for my surgery that the nurse referred to it as "the pregnancy" and avoided as many of the awful words and phrases as possible.

Hey @FuckMyUterus Sorry you're here

I'm actually a little bit pregnant now, 6 weeks today, but so incredibly cautious and wanting to hang around here as long as you'll have me.

I loved temping, gave me a nit of insight and control and I was ovulating 4 days later than I thought I was based on ewcm and stabbing feelings. It's basically free and I found it so easy and convenient.