TTC after MC April 07 - Return to the Mother Ship

[popsy76]

Hi Ladies, thought I would just grab the bull by the proverbial horns and get this going. Hope the name is okay. MrsMc I am afraid we will all be thinking of you and your DH (and his light saber) everytime we post

Too many individual posts to go back and answer so I thought I'd start with a positive message for all of us from the March thread and for any MC newbies...

Today is my 1 month MN anniversary and I do not know what I would have done without you all. It is the ability to get on here and "let it all out" that keeps me going. I have been blessed to have found you all and whatever lies in my future - your kindness and advice will stay with me forever.

Big Love and Hip hip hooray for a fabulous new positive thread POPSY xxxx

p.s. Gilly get your arse down to london - we can drink the bars dry of Rose (purely medicinal of course )

p.p.s. also - Rampant sex life is blighted by cystitis - anyone else have this problem - I am cursed with it. Got it loads when was ttc at end of last year and am back having it once a month now again grrrrrrrrrrrrrrr (but is worth it ).
I know best thing is to go to loo straight after sex but doesn't help the ttc much arghhhh

last one sorry...Ellie sounds promising - keeping everything crossed for you - maybe that time off work worked its magic already ?

lol popsy! i love prague and flying wont harm his sperm!

patkica, after all of my mcs its taken a while for my cycle to calm down. i tend to have long then short cycles. tbh tho after the last one i went straight back into a 29d cycle so maybe my bodys used to it now!

patkica is horid when body is against you - sounds like you will know either way very soon though?If you read 2/3 weeks back you'll see i had classic signs halfway through (and went doolally) and then af came 2 weeks later - the oppo is Mrsmac who had classic signs and is PG - so defo hold onto the hope!!!!!!! (have crossed everything including eyes - hard to type though )
lissielou maybe i can test when get there and if BFN all the more reason to tuck into cheap booze tee hee

I like it that there is an officially PG lady on this thread is very nice. Hurrah!
Really don't think I can be though I think am ovulating today and last had nookie days ago so v unlikely.
Helpfully informed DP that was ovulating last night but I think was a bit too much information for him, so nothing doing. Bah.

Well AF arrived. Went to Docs, tests all clear. Kind of worst case scenario this month (obviously didn't want there to be something too wrong but something dealable with would have been nice). Big argument with DH too so not much sleep and spent most of last 24 hours in tears.

Doc was good though - will repeat Day 21 test to check it wasn't just this month I ovulated. Will also refer me in the summer if not pg (rather than 18 months as she had hinted before) but that will be a year since m/c and more than that in total.

Thanks to those who have asked after me (don't feel bad torres - I didn't need much encouragement) and sorry to those who also feel rubbish at hte mo.

Hope things are still looking good MrsMc.

Welcome back Jady - thanks for the positivity. Much needed. Welcome NH101.

So sorry Wheely . HUgs to you.

My friend from work is PG with twins and she's just come in showed me the 6 week scan photo. Am so pleased for her cos she had IVF but I miss being PG and I miss my baby and I want to cry

Thanks Lissielou - you of all people know what it is like but at the same time you give me hope - we have to be brave and keep battling don't we.
Patkica - GPs are hopeless -just seem to think its my age and didn't even really want to give me a weeks sick note-even tho they know i'm dealing with my mums chemotherapy at the same time!!AAgghh! IVF consultant told me to give up as my eggs were so poor - no reaction to last cycle at all on maximum drugs.I am taking note of your rant as I have no idea what 1st AF will be like! Sounds horrid.Poor you.

Ellie - poor you. I think we're in the same slump - must be hormones. I'm hoping, anyway. A man at work has just had a baby - or his wife has - and it was a girl. Signing his 'congratulations' card was extra hard, as I'd just found out my miscarriage baby was a girl too.

Jady - GPs are farking hopeless, aren't they. It takes two weeks to get an appointment, then they just go down the standard route - too old, keep trying, what will be will be. CHRIST. I'm currently trying to circumvent the GP by going direct to the hospital, but as you can imagine this is a frustrating experience of getting stuck in their labyrinthine internal admin process.

Jady and Herby: so sorry you're both down. medicas in general can be f'ing hopeless. My old GP was, then I found a new one and she is great. I feel a weekend of heavy and fun drinking coming up. Anyone else?

Torres Am hoping you are right re. my bleeding being implantation. I am CD21 today and am still spotting. Pretty sure this isnt an early appearance by Auntie Flo as haven't turned into raging lunatic.
Herby Sounds like we are in the same boat. Lets hope we are spotting because we are pregnant?!!

MrsMc Good luck for Monday

Jady Consultants can be so rude!

Popsy Have to agree that it is easier once you are TTC rather than just recovering. It feels like pregnancy is possible.

Love to everyone else!

Wheely very for you - sending big hugs and virtual chocolate bars and wine (my weakness!).
Has anyone heard from Basil? Are you out there - wondering if AF arrived yet?
Torres - I felt like you mid-Ov last month - i don't tell DH when I'm OV so he thinks I'm just after him for his body ha ha (poor thing).

I thought my friend had been avoiding me and it turns out her little sis is PG grrrr and . She is training to be a midwife so very cautious. Apparently she paid for a 9 week scan and all okay - I was awful and secretly thought - well doesn't mean anything as mine MC after that - am such a nasty person . Am doomed to hate all PG women til I have my baby in my arms - c'est la vie eh?

I was wondering how i would do it differently next time

1. not tell anyone if i can help it (megaphonemouth )
2. not worry about letting work people down when do reveal PG
3. not worry about health as worst happened anyway
4. not think of future with baby til have baby (okay this is impossible but maybe if at least i think it i might persuade a bit of my brain to do it?)

You'll never manage any of it. I am full of similar good intentions but know I could never and would be shouting it from the rooftops probably.

Oh good - I am not the only verbally incontinent one then? I got so stressed out with not being able to talk about it (as I usually talk about every aspect of my life with everyone i meet ). Our families knew as did some work colleagues and friends - however , I have told even more people after the MC so probably doesn't make a difference (however, the more people I spoke about it with the more "real" it became?)

God, go away for 2 days and the entire world changes. mrsMcJr!!!!! Congratulations! I'm so chuffed for you! Everything crossed so that it's smooth sailing through this one!

patkica: I know exactly how you feel. I had m/c April 6 at 6 weeks, and felt ready to hop on the saddle again immediately, only hoping to get pregnant straight away. This entire "cycle" has been really confusing with Lh and CM everywhere. I'm not hopeful for this cycle, but will be relieved when AF comes because maybe then my body will go back to normal. I'm also getting confusing signals: dizzyness, queasyness, off some of my favourite things (sushi added to the list today), yet I know I'm not pregnant (OK, confession, I tested waaaaay to early because I had an open one lying around and I thought it would go bad). It's CD 35 with no sign of AF coming (in a bad sort of way, not preg sort of way). When will I be normal again?!?

Nh101 ? sorry to hear about your MC dealing with it is a process, one step forward and two back a lot of the time I feel, taking each day as it comes really helped me. I think I also accepted that getting pregnant again would not take all the pain away as I thought it would initially. Being pregnant again is so new to me at the mo but it is tinged with a fear and sadness I didn?t have last time, I guess that is what life experience does for you. I really hope you get that BFP soon.

Herby ? sorry about AF as you know, my MC was 1/3 and my cycle after that was so weird, this one seemed pretty much back to normal. I guess it?s all a matter of timing and healing. I hope you get good news soon. Have you spoken to the hospital?

Thanks Torres it really hasn?t sunk in yet. I am getting small ripples of hope and excitement though.

Jady1407 ? there is always a chance as you say. Everything crossed for you. I am so sorry to hear it happened again You must be so strong and brave to see the positives. Sending hugs.

Lissie ? when do you go on hols?

Patkica ? no worries! really hoping that no AF is good news, keep us posted. Those signs all sound promising.

Popsy ? like the name! might be brave enough to adopt it at some point! Thank you for what you said, that was so sweet Chart spotting is the practice of checking on each other?s charts plotted from morning temps (and recording CM signs) in an attempt to pinpoint fertile time! I could tell you all about it if you are interested! LOL I have ALWAYS gone for a wee straight after sex as I knew that it protected you from infections, I find it so hard when TTC not to (and hate the ooozzzy feeling ? uggh TMI sorry ) I liked your list, very relevant to me at the mo. I think they are all good resolutions for me but I?ve decided that I am not going to bend over backwards trying to hide it and lying to my friends and family this time; if I am in a situation (i.e. not drinking!) and am asked, I?m just going to say. If it doesn?t work out, there?s no shame and I?ll need their support. this is mean but those who haven?t bothered to say a word to me after the MC can find out when they see me with a bump!

EllieG happier with the phrase ?probably pregnant? at the mo! My DH gets squeamish at Lady Cycle conversation too!

Wheely ? AF - I?m sorry! I feel so bad for getting all your hopes up now hon. Great that tests are all clear though! I hear you about wanting something to fix but it is good that all is fine. I really feel for you, it is such an emotive time and DH and I fell out a lot about TTC too (suspect beanie was conceived the day after I?d slept in a different room and cried all night!) sending huge hugs to you.

Winky ? keep us posted fingers crossed.

Hi MrsMc I should have known you would be so wise even in the face of this new excitement! I agree about telling people actually - is too bloody hard to contain it. Just emailed colleague about her baby shower explaining why I'm not going and she wrote a lovely reply and said "What a beautiful thing a baby popsy will be" ahhhhh - had me weeping over the keyboard!
I am off to the gym to maintain my bootcamp regime - its thai green curry and more hotel choc for tea yum. Friends coming over tomorrow night so good opportunity for (over)drinking and eating!
MrsMc I think I'm gonna join that hotel choc club - i bought some of their bars last weekend OH MY GOD - had a meg ryan moment . The 62% cocoa milk choc is a revelation!
Have a good weekend ladies - just think first Furrymummy, then Beckle... then MrsMcverylikelyuptheduff...ooooh the baby dust is definitely sticking to our thread hooray!

well, had my day 8 bloods taken today and the fecking nurse really hurt me and my arms bruised to buggery! arrrrggggggghhhhhhh am so fed up of this crap. wish i could just give up, but i cant.

mrsmcj, we go on fri, only to wales for a week but sooo looking forward to it.

I know I'm a little bit late in coming in with this but congrats mrs mc!!!!!!

Hi Everyone,

Im a little bit worried about something. Can you help?

I had a ERPC 4 weeks ago and then a 2nd one 7 days later (the 1st one didnt work). Yesterday i was getting very bad cramps and then had a bit of pink spotting. It only lasted for a couple of hours and then stopped. This morning i woke up and the cramping was alot more severe and the bleeding has gotton heavier. DP have been ttc so i am a little gutted. I have a history of EP (lost right tube) so when AF comes i always do a test to make sure that its negative. Well the test that i did this morning is faintly positive? Does this mean that im pregnant or could the test still be picking up the last pregnancy? Is it normal to have AF if the HCG is still present from the previous pregnancy?

Im really worried now as when i had my EP i had a faint positive and what i thought was my AF.

Any advice would be greatly appreciated.

P.S I never got BFN after the ERPC it was always a faint positive that got fainter each time i tested.

Natalie x

Hello ladies Rubbish weekend weather here [feather duster out tickling you all with baby dust! )

Hi MissNatalie ? how are things today? Sorry to hear you are worried I can understand your fears. I have no experience here but can talk it through with you, hope that helps. I suppose there could be 3 scenarios here that I can see (1) they missed a bit of POC in the last ERPC and you are still producing HCG from it and your body is trying to reject it (2) seems a bit early after only 3 weeks but it could be AF and perhaps it is just an odd one due to the ERPC and your hormones. It is possible that you still have HCG in your body even if all POC are gone. I still got a positive test 3 weeks after my MC. I think HCG has a half life of 36 hours. I know that you can ovulate if you have less than 50 mg of HCG in your system and obviously even if you had OVd again and continued to AF, a test would still show up as pregnant due to those levels (3) you are pregnant again!

Those pains do sound horrible whatever they are and I think you should get medical advice ASAP to be on the safe side. I really feel for you, it is a really scary and emotional time, keep us posted. Sending fortifying hugs xx

Popsy ? hello you! My Mum actually said the same thing on the ?phone yesterday. She said that she thinks our life is stressful enough without having to hide things and that the first few months are so important that she thinks I need support to get through them. She also said that people will want to share our excitement and if things go wrong, it?s easier for us then to let others share our pain if they knew. It feels odd actually, I feel really close to her again . I didn?t when I was pg before or when I MC as she just didn?t seem to get it but this time, I think she is being really supportive it?s nice. We?ve decide to go over there for our summer holiday. I don?t want to be somewhere odd where I don?t understand the medical system especially as we?ll be going just at the stage it all went wrong last time. My Mum is so excited that we are going over! She doesn?t know she?ll see me in 3 weeks for her surprise 60th in London! Glad your colleague was nice, what a lovely thing to say! Have to say I am very impressed by your regime! I went to my slimming class yesterday and I lost 2.5 pounds last week last time round, I didn?t lose a thing when I gave up the booze but I am being more sensible with my food (all good stuff but last time, I think I ate far too much ) Bit worried as my boobs are inflating by the day, might not get into that dress after all for the wedding next Sat, hell!! Don?t have anything else to wear! Might have to go shopping on Friday! Hotel Choc is the answer to prayers, I agree!

Lissie ? sorry that the nurse hurt you. I too have been feeling like a pin cushion recently and no doubt there will be more of that at my appointment tomorrow. What do the day 8 bloods show? I am not surprised you are feeling fed up, you have been through so much already but we won?t let you even get near thoughts of giving up, you will have that lovely squawking reward!! Hope the weather improves for your holiday

Thanks Clairebear how are you?

Oh Jules thank you so much honey. Fabulous news that you are back on track!! what a marvelous relief!! Enjoy the next 6 weeks, be totally selfish, get some lovely treatments ? a massage, Jacuzzi, all the things you cannot do when you are pg ? and drink champagne ? I drank plenty but not enough to last me until the middle of Jan!! Fingers crossed that things happen quickly for you

Hi ladies!
MrsMcblooming how are you? Its so fab that you and your mum have bonded over the new PG. I felt much closer to my Mum when I was Pg but then found it hard to talk after the MC? Anyway - I am looking forward to sharing it all with her again! Have you been having tests already? I was wondering if I would get better treatment this time - or at least an earlier scan as there is no way I'm waiting 13 weeks again! Did you get PG in your second cycle after MC? I can't remember all your details. Was wondering how long yours was this month - or was it right back to normal (okay I'm doing my OV calcs again and keep trying to out-plan it all )

I'm in work teaching today (good money so can't refuse!)- taking DH to heathrow in a bit - got the last BD in this morning so should last me a few days - sods law I'll OV towards end of next week . Actually I hope it'll not be til he's back - I have to keep telling myself that even if it is - it doesn't mean we'll necessarily get PG this month .

Has anyone noticed that weekends are harder than weekdays - I went to sainsos yesteday and was just overcome with sadness as was surrounded by PG ladies, new babies and kids of all shapes and sizes...I wanted to be choosing minibaby belles and frubes - all the stressed out mums were screamimg at their kids - I'm hoping I'll be an extra nice mum after going through all of this . Told DH how sad I felt when I got back and he said "we'll get there babe - we're trying aren't we" Bless him - I was so chuffed as I thought he wasn't too keen - I love him soooo much (phew eh? ha ha)

MrsMcyummymummy I remember you talking about buying that dress as a lucky talisman - it worked didn't it. Ooh lucky you with the boobs - I can't wait to have mine back again (even if not permanently ). Well done for losing wieght when PG - I put on 1/2 stone immediately - nothing had changed but I was really swollen from the word go - so think was water retention. I worry about that PG as I never felt it was quite right with all the pains and swelling - like my body was trying to reject the PG all along. I hope is not the same next time as will be too stressful .

Hi MissNatalie - hope you have managed to talk to the doc by now - is horrid when things aren't right and you don't know if you are over reacting or not. When I had pains 3 weeks after erpc i eventually phoned doc and she said nothing to worry about unless bleeding/bad smell so may be worth giving them a call? Let us know how you get on

Still no Basil - please come and let us know how you are doing xxxx

Hey lissielou My veins are reaaly hard to find (makes me think am VERY FAT ). Was fucking sods law that had all my jabs before the Missed-MC scan so had bruised arms for a week after to remind me of that happy moment - chatting away to midwife and feeling relaxed and excited about our future as a family...god not even worth thinking about. Had another PG announcement yesterday i need a mantra to get me though them (had another glass of rose and did seem to take the sting out)

p.s. MrSMc - so pleased you are still with us...will be so weird without you!