TTC after pregnancy loss - thread 15 - Christmas miracles

[TheGrumpySquirrel]

New thread!

@MrsMac1489 I did a test the day I started bleeding and it was the strongest positive I'd had! It gave me false hope.
That's good that it's on its way back down.

@DaisyMay25

I think I was just so excited about this baby. I told everyone and we wrote lists and talked names. Feels like I'm letting go to easily.

@MrsMac1489 I get that, we've got names already picked.
I knew the second I found out that something wasn't right but DH was excited the entire time. It feels like he's forgotten it ever happened.
Don't heat yourself up for wanting to try again, hopefully you don't have to wait too long for you BFP

@DaisyMay25

It's a bit of a rollercoaster isn't it. When they told us we had suboptimal HCG I knew things weren't right. But then we saw the heartbeat and had a positive viability scan so I told myself it was fine. But in the meantime I was talking to people at work about their pregnancies and losses, preparing myself for when it happened. When I started bleeding I wasn't at all surprised. The women in the scan room must have thought I was very cold when there was no reaction from me and OH when they told us there was no evidence of a pregnancy. I knew I'd had a miscarriage, the scan results weren't a shock for me. It only hit me a few days later, I spent hours having a horrible fights with my husband and then howling on the bed in absolute emotional agony. I'll never forget this time in my life, or the baby who for a short time chose me as it's Home. But I'm so ready for this time to be over now. Xx

@MrsMac1489 I'm testing for negatives too. Still coming up as positive but getting fainter, thank god.

@mrsmac my test were positive until about 10 days after my miscarriage but when I went back to the hospital 2 weeks later it was negative. We started trying as soon as I stopped bleeding but I haven't had a bfp yet (miscarried on 23/10)

I think my tests will be positive still. AF seems to be on the tail end now which is nice. Might give the EPAC a ring tomorrow as I think we still need to check the last bit is physically gone with the AF I had (I'm not sure it has tbh). Maybe test on Friday I'm not sure.

Yes MrsMac1489 I defo think we're in the same place. Where did you hear the term "🌈 baby" it really cheered me up! Did you make it up?

That is so cool NelleB and Hollymchollyface
inspiring! I hope it all goes well xxx

@peachesarenom

I'm a midwife. I hear it a lot from my ladies who are having a baby following a loss.

"After the storm has passed, there is a rainbow of hope."

It's a lovely way of thinking of a new life coming into the world and bringing with it so much beauty after fear and darkness.

I adore the term rainbow baby! We all need our own rainbows after what we've all been through. I am peeing on sticks like mad. Continually checking I am pregnant praying AF doesn't come x

Tentatively joining.

We have been TTC since Sep and had a miscarriage on 26th Dec at 5.5weeks.

Now in the mentally draining 'no mans land' of not knowing what my body is doing.

We started TTC again within a week (once bleeding stopped) as it felt right.

It's feels like the MC was months ago but was only three weeks ago!

I know you shouldn't ever wish time away but cannot wait to get my body back in sync and try figure out what's going on.

We conceived within 1 or 2 cycles with our first two so think it has me worried subconsciously maybe somethings 'changed'.

Going to be keeping an eye on this thread and hopefully see lots of positive news from others

mrsmac that is a lovely description of calling yourself home, i miss the babies that choose me desperately too, even though it will be almost a year since my first mc....

patience welcome to this amazing supportive group. i hope you fall pregnant quickly....i think i spend a lot of my time wishing various bits of time away each month waiting for fw and af to appear. its sad wishing so much time away....

AF hasn't showed yet. I was due yesterday. i haven't tested. i'm too scared to if I'm honest, the disappointed might push me over the edge. I'm sure my body is messing me about...i only had a 23 cycle last month, normally I'm 26 days, but i have had a 28 day cycle too....it's cycle day 28 today, so i think if I get to friday I might be brave and do a test. i hate the hope. its torture.

@NoCatsHere it's sounding quite promising for you! Fx you get your BFP! you have a lot more will power than I do by not testing yet. I know I can be scary tho..

Finally saw the nurse today, spotting is brown and barely there.

She said there's a possibility I'm pregnant and it's not showing up yet, to wait a week and take another test A WEEK. God knows how I'll wait that long.

She also said although my other AFs since mx have been regular it can take a while for my body to get into a rhythm so it could be that. Feeling less stressed after talking to her.

@DaisyMay25 I saw my GP yesterday and I need to make it to 5+2, I'm 4+4. She reassured me so much. I was lighter when I came out. Still don't know how I will make it to Monday. Glad you feel better. Xx

Another trip to the EPAC tomorrow. They'll be sick of seeing my mug soon

@NelleB I'm glad you feel better but I bet those five days drag! Hopefully good news at the end of it though.

@UnicornsandRainbows1 haha I bet they know who you are as soon as you walk in now. Hopefully some good news for you tomorrow then!

I'm gonna test again on Monday, a week is far too unrealistic for me plus if I am all my symptoms point towards another ectopic one

MrsMac1489 I really love it! I could do with a 🌈 💕 I can't believe the first day you said it I also saw that double rainbow!

DaisyMay25 I've got my fingers crossed for you x

Personally I've had an awful lot of watery cm yesterday. What on earth does that mean?

Hi girls, new to Mumsnet and saw this post so thought I would say hello! Currently ttc straight after miscarriage (6 weeks) on 27th Dec. Now 3dpo. Not holding out much hope for this month but keeping fingers tightly crossed none the less. Going to try not to test unless af is late but I know my will power is incredibly weak so we shall see! Good luck to you all on your ttc journeys x

@peachesarenom thank you! I've read that people experienced it like 'flood gates opening' the month they got a bfp? But it couldn't be your hormones steadying out.

@mamabear05 sorry you find yourself here, hopefully you won't be here long. I'm an early tester, I have no willpower haha, hope it's good news for you this month!

OMG!DaisyMay25 Is it too late to DTD today? I did on Tues.

Welcome mamabear05

@peachesarenom I had the same experience back in Nov when I conceived. Noted in on my FF chart 4/5 days before it suggested I ovulated and of course I got pregnant then. Haven't had it to that extent this month though. Good luck and thanks for the warm welcome x

Thanks Daisy too xx

@Patienceofatoddler it sounds like we could be cycle buddies! Fingers crossed our stays here are short x

@peachesarenom do you track your ovulation at all? No harm in dtd tonight haha