Yams, fertile feckers and what not to say.

[LimpLettice]

Part the third:

Welcome all anti-fertile fuckers! This is our clique for those trying longer than 6 cycles and are pretty fed up.

Here are our Fucked Off TTC Commandments

• Thou shall not arrive one day and post BFP next day
• Thou shall not give advice to other when TTC for one month only
• Thou shall not participate in one-up-manship and realise TTC is shit for everyone in different ways
• Thou shall allow posters to be fucked off with the world and everything in it at regular points in the month
• Thou shall not be offended by strong language
• Thou shall not tell everyone to eat yams
• Thou shall accept being called a muppet for testing at 7dpo at 9pm at night

Our spreadsheet which includes what supplements (and potatoes) we are trying in our journey to motherhood.

HA! I flipping love this thread. I mean I also love yams but just because they make nicer chips. If they’re supposed to make you more fertile I wish someone would have told my body that at some point over the past 14 months...

Hey ladies, just wondering if it is too late to join this thread? I saw your last one and lol'd at the name after also reading that STUPID thread but it just moved too fast for me to jump on! Can't believe she's now pregnant
Been TTC #1 for about 18 months now and not a sniff of a BFP in that time, we have been referred to our local FC and had most of the tests, hubby has a slight morphology issue but all other parameters are so high that they don't think it should be a problem. Looking to move onto IVF but I'm pretty scared of the intervention and the level of upset when if it doesn't work.
I'm also in Scotland and our school term runs Mar-Feb so I'd love a summer baby if anyone can manage to just work that out for me

Have some yams @florafoxtrot that'll sort you right out

Honestly the only way that thread could have been worse is if she'd told us she SMEPd as well.

Never too late! Hello Flora.

Bubble I could shag for Britain, and even I balk at the 'oh crap, we have to' evenings. I feel the same. I have never been more in right place, financially, emotionally, all of it, and of course I am now too OLD and wrinkly for an easy time of it. Gah.

@Bubblegum89 Your version of sitting on the sofa sounds a lot like ours "Let's just watch this last epic fail video on YouTube and then we'll go upstairs" lol x

My mum got pregnant with me whilst she had a coil!?
She felt ill and they thought the copper was making her ill so arranged to have it taken out but found out she was pregnant. They warned her that the removal would like result in miscarriage but I’m clearly stubborn and grimly hung on.
She was 35 but I’m number 3...

Welcome @Florafoxtrot! Similar position to you, been trying nearly two years, DH low morphology. We actually got our first bfp in October on cycle 20 but I miscarried last week. But it can happen! Good luck and make sure you're eating yams, not sweet potatoes, as apparently they're not the same thing. Although who knows which one that woman meant, so maybe eat both?!

My dh isn’t a fan of evening shags, preferring morning sessions (it’s an energy thing he says) so during fw we end up having to wake up super early to fit it in before work. It’s exhausting.
We amuse ourselves by coming up with stupid ways of saying “we need to shag” or “do we need to?” Because it all ends up getting a bit clinical and awkward and a bit Victorian.

Seriously a yam is not a sweet potato? Not a hope in hell my local Tesco stocks these. Best nip to Holland and Barratt for the supplements instead...

So sorry to hear about your MC Sooz that is unbelievably cruel and you are doing very strong to be here and maintaining your sense of humour.

I'm also up for the FB group.

Thanks, @Florafoxtrot, it all feels like a bit of a dream now. Although I still burst into tears whenever I tell anyone in person. I'm currently off work which is a huge relief, I nearly went back today. DH is looking after me and in trying to keep exercising and filling my days with busy stuff to take my mind off things. There's also the part of me that knows I got a bfp once so it could happen again, which I know is not guaranteed but it actually does make me feel hopeful again. Although ask me again in a year when I'm still not preggers and I'll have changed my tune!

I had two weeks off after my MC Sooz and honestly I should have had three. I struggled badly when I went back, cried in the toilet and questioned how I ever managed to do my job normally. I couldn't make any decisions at all.

Fuck knows what my team thought was happening.

I think that is the thing, I'm loathe to say to you that you should concentrate on the fact that you were pregnant as I believe that's one of the worst thing to say to someone that has had a miscarriage but perhaps its not the worst thing anymore when you'd been trying for as long as you were and if it gives you comfort then fire on.
We are at the FC on Thursday for a further consultation, just not sure what I want to do.

@Florafoxtrot, good luck on Thursday, remember you don't have to make a decision straight away, go into the consultation with an open mind and maybe you'll feel stronger for one way or the other afterwards.

@steak that all sounds like fun! Not sure I’ll be able to rouse OH in the morning either- when I’ve put him under time pressure (I have a train to catch) before he’s then struggled to finish! 😂 poor thing. I know it’s rubbish for him too with scheduling in shags for fw!
Romance....

Flora - depending on where in Scotland you are, there can be a waiting list of up to a year for IVF, even once you’re added to the list.

(Edinburgh, for example, is a year).

So you could go, join the list, and then decide what you want to do. And keep trying in the meantime.

Are you near Ed or Glasgow? I went to the natural fertility centre and they were a massive help x

Limp I’m the same, I’m up for a shag 90% of the time, hell I even shag OUTSIDE of my fertile week but even I find it a bit of a drag when I’m elbow deep in a share bag of Doritos and my OH is like “well we better get upstairs then.” The worst is when I get in from work, he wakes up from his night shift and we have about 20 minutes to spare before I have to pick DD up from school. Try doing the school run with sex face and that lovely “leftover” feeling...

Lookingatthestars haha that sounds like an all too familiar scenario!

Bubble - put your mooncup in after - I’ve heard it helps

(But I could never use a cup - every single one I tried made me vomit - couldn’t tell you why)

Thanks Nimble - I was aware that the waiting lists were long. We are in Aberdeen so the list is apparently 8 months and we wouldn't qualify to go on it until July...
Did read good things about the Fertility Centre but obviously I'd need to make a concerted effort to go - could I make one trip or would I need to go a few times?

After what nimble? I’m fine with blood and gross stuff. Plus it might not be as weird as my putting a tampon up to my face in an attempt to see what’s been going on.

I’m on an infertility group on FB and someone has made a post saying that another person had said something about secondary infertility and a guy on the group commented saying that she should be grateful to have just one and that she “already won the lottery and now you’re looking to win it again.” As in, don’t be so greedy. Why are people such utter cunts? I didn’t realise that ttc was a competition

Sorry - meant using the cup after sex. I know there aren’t sperm issues, but might help on the school run!

Flora - it’s a weekly thing, so a right pain in the arse from Aberdeen.

But sounds like your waiting lists are shorter than here, so that’s good.

I can ask Ed if they can recommend someone in Aberdeen?

That would be awesome! I'm already getting reflexology and fertility massage at the Rosemount Centre but anything else is much appreciated.

NB - I am not a hippy... with all this alternative stuff - the fertility massage is free as the reflexology lady is just learning!

Hi flora, I remember you from another thread - lovely to see you, though sorry for obvious reason

Guys am feeling nervous - have GP appt tomorrow as it's been a year and over 12 cycles; am wondering whether to cancel and wait a bit more. It's only just a year, but also conscious that referrals take a little while and she has limited availability (no appointments showing yet in Dec). She's already done initial bloods, ultrasound and SA for DH. Ugh. Think I'm just over-thinking and nervous about taking further steps.

Aaaanyhoo - should I join this FB group? Don't want to lose you guys - this thread's a lifesaver.

Also, what is going on at the moment on the threads - seriously with the summer/autumn baby thing??

Same - but it helped me feel more in control, which was totally worth it when i was losing my mind.