Yams, fertile feckers and what not to say.

[LimpLettice]

Part the third:

Welcome all anti-fertile fuckers! This is our clique for those trying longer than 6 cycles and are pretty fed up.

Here are our Fucked Off TTC Commandments

• Thou shall not arrive one day and post BFP next day
• Thou shall not give advice to other when TTC for one month only
• Thou shall not participate in one-up-manship and realise TTC is shit for everyone in different ways
• Thou shall allow posters to be fucked off with the world and everything in it at regular points in the month
• Thou shall not be offended by strong language
• Thou shall not tell everyone to eat yams
• Thou shall accept being called a muppet for testing at 7dpo at 9pm at night

Our spreadsheet which includes what supplements (and potatoes) we are trying in our journey to motherhood.

I'm all up for restarting my life! The last 6mths since my mc I've put things off, including fitness and diet, because I might get pg soon. Well here I am fat and not upduffed! I'm on a holiday booking mission for June, I've rejoined weight watchers and I'm back to my 2 cups of coffee a day. Life is to short. I've decided to treat myself to a hair cut, get nails done, massage etc for every 1/2 stone I lose. I want to be more present and shift my focus from what might have been or what could happen.

Ooh I like it, Rhi ! I've put on weight over the last few months, so will add that to my treats ideas. I really want to be back at 9st by the time I get pregnant. The realistic me says that that gives me, most likely, a good few years to achieve this weight (!), but the optimistic me says I'd better get properly started, just in case I've only got a month or two until I'm pregnant...ha, yeah right...

wonky well done! When's it booked for? Let us know how it goes! It does feel better to be doing something. Feels like we have a bit more control over the uncontrollable.

Hi @NewSense The consultation isn't until February 6th when I have some annual leave and treatment won't be until after Easter but at least booking it feels like doing something! Currently on cd38 and no sign of af so cycles still clearly bloody... well... wonky but I'll def report back afterwards

rhi I can totally relate. I've put on weight over the last year and presumed it didn't matter as if he pregnant soon so have put off losing it.

@mamabooksbabynumber2 I have had day 21 bloods done and all came back fine. DH is really reluctant to have SA done. Just think he's worried it could be him. He's still in the 'itll happen' stage. Theres no point in nagging him he has always done things in his own time. In a way it's made me relax more because there's not a lot else I can do. I turn 30 this year so maybe if it still hasn't happy by then it'll be kick he needs. I think because he is military and would need to be seen at military hospital/med center that's making it worse for him. You know blokes...if there is an issue it's could affect his 'manliness'! Although I feel like I'm making him out to be a Neanderthal he's not just likes to do things in his own time.

MY BODY IS A PIECE OF SHIT.

That is all.

Oh @bubblegum what’s happened?

Ugh it’s just a dick June had v regular 28 day cycles since I started my period age 12 (now 28) been on and off b/c since 17 and my cycles have never been affected. Could pinpoint af down to almost the hour. 10 months after coming off the implant, I ov’d really late so my cycle was 34 days. Next month 26 days, month after 31 days. Last month it went back to normal. Thought that was that. This week I was getting lots of cm literally gushing out on Wednesday and Thursday. Did one opk on Thursday eve (not supposed to be doing them anymore for my own sanity lol) it was negative and I usually get a blazing positive a day or so before I ov. My boobs have hurt all week but yesterday they started hurting a lot more which doesn’t normally happen until a week before af is due. I have no idea when I ovulated due to negative opk Thursday eve (my surges always last for two day so can’t have missed it overnight) suggesting I’d had no surge yet so couldn’t have ovulated on Friday but been having post-ov symptoms since Saturday. And if I DID ov on Friday, that means this cycle will be 25 days so back to being irregular.

I just don’t know what is going on or why, I’m not doing anything different than I have been. It’s so random. Pissing me off, after 16 years of super regular periods, for them to just change without warning 10 months into ttc is just frustrating :(

bubblegum :( sorry. That really is frustrating. Mine also used to be SO reliable. Alternating 26 then 28 day cycles. Always. Since a teen. Was so easy to predict.

Now I'm like you. Some as short as 21, some up to 30 days. They've been even more erratic since my miscarriage, which was several months ago now, so I'd hoped they'd settle back down, but no.

I've also given up on opks. I gave up about 3 years ago. Thinking maybe I should start again. But as you say, for sanity reasons maybe it's best not to!

Are you going to see anyone about the irregularity? (sorry if you've already said further up thread! I get confused between usernames - not great at remembering everyone's stories!)

Thanks NewSense glad I’m not the only one. I’m sorry to hear about your mc :(

I haven’t been to anyone but I have a follow up at the fertility clinic in a couple of weeks and I will mention it then. I’m wondering if maybe I just didn’t ovulate this month at all but I don’t know if that would cause my post-ov symptoms to start earlier than I would ordinarily ovulate, if that makes sense? Have you seen anyone about yours?

@bubblegum it’s shit isn’t it. Like the minute you decide to TTC your body just goes ‘ha don’t think so’ and everything goes screwy. My periods came back fine at 26 days after DD even though I was still bf’ing her. They’d always been 26 days since coming off b/c. Then at the beginning of last year they went down to 17 days, then 19, then 21. That’s when I started taking agnus Castus to try to regulate them. Which did seem to help but occassionally made them 31/32 days. It is so frustrating because you just know when your normal af date goes by that you’re not pregnant it’s just your body playing with your mind.

That’s why I can’t give up opk’s, we’d have to dtd every other day for the whole month in the hope of catching ovulation and with DH working away so much it just wouldn’t work.

Hi, can I join you please?
I’m 38 and on c7 and cd 21. I have children but dp doesn’t so trying for our first together! I came off the mini pill in July and my cycles range from 26-32 days so I have no idea when I’m ovulating 🙄
I’ve dabbled with opk but trying not to get too obsessed with it so it’s been half arsed!

LexiJean is it emma cannon you’ve been seeing for acupuncture? I ask because I’ve got her book ‘fertility’ and all of what you’ve said has been in her book. I’m making chicken broth as we speak 😊

Good luck to everyone. I hope we get our bfp’s very soon

bubblegum that's good that you have an appointment coming up at which you can ask about it. Hopefully it'll just be a blip that will sorry itself out soon...

I've not made an appointment about this specifically, but am awaiting an ultrasound appointment (hopefully soon), so will, like you, mention it at my follow-up from that.

Armygirl hello! I hope you don't stay here long ;) would you recommend that book?

newsense hi, yes I really enjoyed reading her book. It focuses on diet, gentle exercise, going with the flow etc. I’ve always believed nutrition can have a massive effect on our health so it’s something I’m quite open to generally. 😊

Hey all, got the ball rolling with a doctors appointment last week. Going to test DP first, then me.

Much stress has disappeared now that we've finally moved house so hoping that will help as well 😊

Good morning everyone!!!
How's everyone been this weekend?
Well done fairy on getting the ball rolling with tests.

My af is making an exit and I'm ready to start another cycle (12!)
mrsjones I understand about the masculine thing. My dp had a mild freak out as it felt more real and was worrying abour the changing dynamics if we have a baby. All fine now but obv at the time I was like wtf. I think as its been a year he was jist checking in with himself but freaked me out a little j have to say!

AF arrived this morning. 😢 Started to get just a teeny bit hopeful as I expected it a couple of days ago. 😢

Ugh. That sucks love . Sorry :(

I'm in FW, but not hopeful really. Usually I'm like "yes! Another chance! Let's do this!". Just feeling apathetic this month.

Got the news of the arrival of a good friend's baby today. So happy for them, and popped out to the shops to buy a gift, but was a little depressed standing in the baby section looking at all the clothes I don't need to buy for my non-existent baby. Ho hum.

Sorry about AF pina that teeny bit of hope is a real headfuck. Every time.

Ah, hugs new I think we all have those dips, I definitely have. Especially when buying baby gifts...hope you're doing OK

Thanks guys. Sorry to hear of all the AF & baby bombs & BFN's recently, it really sucks.

My positivity from @juneybean is that my next BFP is due 10th Feb, near Valentines Day, so maybe I could begin thinking of a nice way to announce it then! 🤞

Hi All.
@FairyAnn congrats on the move, I hope you settle in quickly to your new home
@LovePinaColada Boo Hiss to AF, I'm on cd40 now and even tho I've had numerous bfns I can't hold back the tiny 'what ifs' grrr
@NewSense Good for you for being happy for your friend, it's not always easy
@Milknosugar1 Thomas Shelby. (Not Cillian Murphy, although I'm sure he's a charming fella - specifically Thomas Shelby)

It's the hope that's the worse, definitely @wonkydonk87. 😢 But - in a funny way I am pleased as this is the most 'normal' AF I have had for 6 months! My fingers are crossed for you - how long is your cycle normally?

@milk if I get another bfn this month then I think the universe owes me Tom Hardy. And a night to be free and single with him 🙈 that’s basically the only thing that would make not being pregnant any better!

Sorry for the af arriving @pina, there are no words really to make it better.

@new being happy for other people who seem to manage what we can’t is really hard but I think it does get easier, or maybe after so long you become de-sensitised to it.