TTC after pregnancy loss - lucky thread 13

[TheGrumpySquirrel]

Hi guys I couldn't see a new thread so hope you don't mind me starting it off @BertieBotts ?

After yesterday & in the cold light of day I feel like such an idiot.
Luckily I don’t start work until one so don’t have to face anyone just yet!

DH wants us both to go to counselling, not sure how I feel about that but I’m not dismissing it.

I took an IC today, bfn but I’m technically not due AF until Sunday, so I’m saving a frer for then.

Yellow both DH and I have had separate counselling this year and we have both benefitted hugely. In our case it's been more to do with health and work issues, but it's been great to have someone to talk to about my most recent mc. I'd recommend it.

Well first post mc Af has turned up bang on when i estimated which im pretty glad about, Hate having bfn's but no af. And I'm happy my body is following my pre mc routine of a 12day lp. Least I can now focus on this cycle! Hopefully it will be back to my 26day cycles and I'll be ovulating in 12 days.

I've never considered counselling for anything but definatley wouldn't dismiss it xx

I know AF means giving up on the hope of a bfp but I always see them as turning the page & starting again.

We’ve got a telephone appt with her tonight, I’ll keep an open mind.

Hey Bluee sorry to hear about your first AF. I'm day 4 on my first AF after MC. I also normally have 26 days cycles so hopefully we'll both get back to normal and get BFP around the same time!! Fingers crossed xx

yellow always good to keep an open mind and give it a go.. hope the phone appt is useful tonight.

Ach no, Bluee I'm so sorry.

I'm just waiting for AF too. Sucks.

Yellow hope you guys get on well tonight.

Hi all
I have been watching this thread for some time now & I must say you all inspire me. A little background I'm 38 (nearly 39) have a 1 ds aged 13 from a previous relationship (his dad never been around one of life's drifters!!) & was single for 12 years my ds is my world so concentrated on me & him! Last year I met my soul mate & is now my fiancé. Unfortunately like several of you I have suffered 3 miscarriages 1st Dec 16@ 8w3d probable mmc 2nd may 17 cp & 3rd July 17 @7w I am currently under the rmc & have seen a senior registrar, we have held off ttc to have all tests carried out & tomorrow we see the professor (who is taking our case on) for results & hopefully a treatment plan. Some earlier bloods show my blood was slow, I hope you all don't mind me joining you & as I said your all an inspiration.....

Wondering if I’ve written myself off too soon. Im only 10/11dpo. However temp has dropped so I doubt there is any chance. Feeling crappy physically so I think AF will arrive on Friday as scheduled

Hey everyone!
Have'nt posted in ages but I've been here lurking in the shadows. So sorry to see so many new members! Just goes to show how many of us go through miscarriage. Thank god for threads like these even if we don't comment it really is a feeling of support and understanding.
Nothing much to report from me. I'm in my first 2WW after my mmc at 11 weeks (baby measured 7w5d) on July 2nd this year. It sucks so much! I'm desperately trying not to symptom spot but its impossible. Ive been googling like a lunatic the last few days. Im 10 dp0 like you Grumpy and in true hopeful twat territory. Hoping for some good bloody news for once!! Might test on Saturday morning if i can hold on that long, hmmmmmmmmm.

Sorry to hear about AF @BlueeSpottyTiger.

@yellowfrontdoor hope your phone appointment goes well.

@TheGrumpySquirrel some women don't get their BFP until the day they miss AF, or even afterwards. Fingers crossed!

Welcome @Lovemysparkle. So sorry to hear about your losses. Good luck seeing the professor tomorrow at the rmc. Hopefully you'll get some answers.

I'm still feeling down .

Lovemysparkle hello! I'm so sorry your here :( I'm very sorry for your losses.
Fingers crosses for your testing x

grumpy 10/11dpo is still so early.. your not out until the witch is about! Goodluck x

haybay i hope your cycle is back on track!! My fertile week starts in about 8 days. Really hope this is the month for us xx

I'm honestly not sad about staring af i do actually feel really optimistic about this cycle. I'm going to do all the things i was doing when i got pg last time. Exercising for an hour everynight, eating fertility enhancing foods, Using concieve plus properly, opks, following the sperm meets egg plan exactly and I'll add temping on which i did up until cycle 3 when i had my first mc. I need a new bbt thermometer!

Omg I admire you exercising an hour every night @BlueeSpottyTiger. I'm at school 9-10 hours a day, then it's home (sometimes with more work to do), dinner, then bed! Just not enough time/energy in the day. I wish I was young like you lol!

Good luck @dudemeister76 xx

Thank you blue & flat for the welcome I'm so sorry for all of the losses you lovely ladies have suffered, as I said I've been following this thread for some time & I can relate to every emotion/ups/downs/blame/anger/emptiness/envy just to name a few!! With my 1st mc it happened really quickly me & dp were estatic (this is his 1st) had my booking appointment 8+1 & started spotting the same day early evening & took myself to A&E was seen at AGU & we saw our beautiful sparkle & a strong flashing heartbeat, had a bit more spotting on the Sunday & then Monday cramps & red blood rushed back to AGU had to wait 2hrs my dp drove like Lewis Hamilton & literally knock on the door as they started to scan me we could tell by the sonographers face our sparkle had died, we were both feeling like a truck had hit us both she said baby measured 6.5 weeks. As a lot of you have mentioned procedures were talked about & leaflets shoved in our faces I booked in for d&c 4 days later our sparkle was now a procedure!!! I ended up back at A&E in agony & passed the babyNumb doesn't even come close, we never saw a hb with our other 2 & truth be told me & dp are still grieving for all 3, but amazingly it has made us fall in love even more & understand each other in every way (dp is my rock,my bff & my world) the fog does become clearer & you learn to smile again, from the bottom of my heart I hope each & every one of us gets our rainbow 🌈 baby..... sorry for very long post wanted to let you all know that not only do I listen but I HEAR you all hugs to all

Flatwhite aww man 1hour days sound awful! Your a teacher right? Yoy have it tough. At 9/10pm i used to get a burst of energy so me and my partner would exercise ( in a diff way to usual 😉)
I only work 22hours a week over 4 days. I dropped from 37 so i don't have to put dd in childcare xx

Aww Love bless you. It's the worst thing isn't it. I'm glad you and your OH are so close. My dp isn't an emotional guy he never brings up what we've been through but i know it broke his heart when we got the news and he's always there for me :) Goodluck xx

So sorry for your losses Love. You & your partner sound very lucky to have found that in each other.

So AF got me today. Now I won’t be pregnant on my due date. Feeling gutted but trying to see the positives;
We’re away at a spa hotel for a few days next week & is booked myself a vair naice hot stone treatment; I can indulge in that & enjoy all the spa facilities whilst wishing I was pregnant. I can have a glass or two of bubbles whilst wishing I was pregnant. I can stuff myself with fine foods I couldn’t eat otherwise whilst wishing I was pregnant.

Can you all see what a lovely time I’ll have?!

Thanks for the good luck re the counsellor. I’ll report back.

hey ladies. I've not been around for a while so apologies I've missed commenting on quite a lot of stuff.

bluee - so sorry that your AF is here though good that you are also positive about it. I was a bit like that too even though we hadn't tried immediately post MC.

flat - I do sympathise with you teachers - both my parents were teachers so know how much extra they worked. Sorry you are still feeling down. I have everything crossed for you that this is your month.

yellow - hope your phone appointment goes well and sorry this week has been tough - totally get it

sparkle - welcome and sorry for your losses.

This week has been mixed. Back at work after our crappy holiday. Decided to get more focused at work and stop fucking about and it has actually made me feel better about work and I've got more done. First day back, a secretary came over with a card for yet another person in our department whose wife has had a baby girl. Plus started showing me the baby clothes they'd bought. I held it together for a little while and just had a quiet sob in the toilets. That night was walking home and bumped into an old friend (male) not seen in ages. Asked how he was and he said "really good, Holly (his wife) had a baby girl 3 weeks ago". I mean arghhhhhhh!!!!!!! Anyway, I told the secretary re my MC (as she didn't know) and she was obv very understanding (and mortified) and said her daughter had had several. So at least she gets it.

But last couple days been fine. Starting to sort of enjoy work again though my roommate (who constantly sniffs, eats smelly food and types REALLY loudly) is back tomorrow so not looking forward to that! (though she leaves in Jan - waa hoo!!!). Only got tomorrow left as only work 4 days.

Got flashing smiley yesterday which was CD11 so we DTD last night. Was going to tonight as well but I have eczema down there so it hurts if do it too often so break tonight and then will try for tomorrow, Fri and Sat with everything crossed.

Had massive row with OH monday night - he is out with his mates friday night (which is fine) though is either coming home at lunch (as I don't work fridays) or before he goes out to DTD. Then he said he had band practice thurs night. Again, fine but they've started going to pub after and then he's not home until 1030ish. So I sort of said, that's fine but can you not go to pub after. Was met with lots of raised voice telling me that he needs to have time with his friends etc (band friends are same friends he's out with Fri night btw!!) so I had a massive meltdown because it's FW week and I am now 39. Anyway, he had forgotten it is FW week so he said he won't go at all thursday (which wasn't what I was saying) but that's good.

I sometimes think men don't get it. That said, when we were DTD last night he seemed more determined than me if you know what I mean!!!

just seen your latest yellow - so sorry.x

Hope you can relax on your weekend away and enjoy it xx

Hi everyone. I haven't been on here for a couple of weeks and have tried to catch up with all the news.

Yellow and Flat, I have been having a hard week too. Not sure why. It's 7 weeks since my MC now and I had been doing well, hence not coming on here, but this week is tough.

I haven't heard about the cremation service for my baby yet but I might go along after what you said weasledee. Maybe it will help. Or maybe I will do something private at the same time it happens. Not sure yet.

I got my letter from the RMC this week and should have an appointment for mid to late November. But I am not giving up ttc in the meantime... They haven't mentioned anything yet about that.

My first post-MC AF was 12 days ago now and I usually have a 32 day cycle so hoping next week I will ovulate, as DH is away this week.

God I can't believe I am back tracking this stuff again. I have been pregnant nearly six months of this year thanks to having 3 MCs and have absolutely nothing to show for it.

ps - I know what you mean re doing those things whilst actually just wishing you were pregnant - I had that lots on holiday - just thinking, "I actually don't want to drink because I want to be pregnant"

@yellowfrontdoor I struggle doing things that you can't do while pregnant! Alcohol is the main one, and I every time I've had it I've cried.

I can't even face my own birthday, as I should have been 20 weeks, and I'll have my period!

Flat I am totally the same as you there - I should have been having my 20 week scan on the week of my birthday at the end of October. Just being able to drink is going to bring it all back.

@love I'm really sorry for your losses. I have also had 3 miscarriages this year. I've got my appointment at the recurrent miscarriage clinic on Tuesday (was supposed to be in November but I work at the hospital so I had a look and found a cancellation so asked for it!) @love would you mind telling me a bit about what they do at the clinic?

Sorry about af @bluee and @yellow xx

I found out at the weekend my SIL’s (announced her pregnancy just after me the first time around) due date is my fucking Birthday!!! Please please please please to whatever/whoever may/may not be out there... please don’t let her have her child on my birthday. What is it about birthdays?!

Evening all.
Not posted much but have been following along.

Welcome to all the new ladies...so sorry you find yourselves here but it's really lovely to have an understanding community.

Yellow-so sorry AF came. I'm totally with you on not enjoying the 'silver linings'. I'm on a hen do this weekend and would so rather not be able to drink.

Coastal-sorry circumstances keep rubbing it in. It's mad how it keeps happening isn't it? We have friends who have announced their first pregnancy and their due date is exactly the same as ours would have been. So now I have a permanent comparison. I find it so hard to look at pictures of her bump.
Im so pleased for them but it makes my heart hurt for me.

Flat-you are doing a fab job of reminding me why I gave up teaching last year!! Good on you for your outstanding observation...that's amazing in normal circumstances but is flipping brilliant given how low you're feeling. Teaching is such a tough slog when you're having to hide feeling awful. Xx

Plodding along here. Just finishing AF so at that stage where there's nothing to do but wait a bit to begin OPKs. Don't like this bit...feels like I'm making no progress. At least once I start OPKing I feel like I'm doing something.

Anyway, hope you're all ok this evening. Am curled up with carbs, tv and pjs.