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Conception

When's the best time to get pregnant? Use our interactive ovulation calculator to work out when you're most fertile and most likely to conceive.

TTC after pregnancy loss: We're nervous, we're hopeful, we're checking all the charts and taking all the vits!

999 replies

BertieBotts · 15/08/2017 23:09

Welcome back all and welcome new posters.

Flowers Brew Cake

OP posts:
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14
beanhunter · 02/09/2017 17:45

They are currently hiding under a cupboard.
Once the bleeding stopped I felt better. There wasn't such an obvious reminder. In fact I'm almost In a weird way looking forward to my period and trying to see it as the start of something new if that makes sense? But I'm a week ahead of you emotionally x

Flatwhite31 · 02/09/2017 17:55

@beanhunter I think that's why I'm still struggling a lot. I'm bleeding loads today in comparison to yesterday. How long did you bleed for if you don't mind me asking? I'm on day 8. Xx

UnicornsandRainbows1 · 02/09/2017 18:03

@Flatwhite it does make the whole process seem never-ending Sad I had mine on the 19th July and stopped bleeding on the 4th or 5th of August so just over 2 weeks, but I was still passing things (it was ridiculous the amount of clots that had formed beforehand Sad). And I had an added week before the surgery too.

I think it does come in waves, but I hope it eases off for you soon

beanhunter · 02/09/2017 18:10

Mine was less - only around 6 days I think.

MogScratch · 02/09/2017 19:03

Same here with the testing. They said they test for abnormalities which I assumed was chromosomal tests, but second time I asked more about it and they said just test if molar or not. Bit misleading I thought.

beanhunter · 02/09/2017 19:24

Mine is being tested for genetics too but that because it's not a first loss and also we've had ivf failures. They also tested for molar.

KerryLeanne84 · 02/09/2017 20:37

Awesome that you got the cats bean - something lovely to distract you! They're very cute.

I had sex for the first time since the miscarriage/ erpc today which was odd but nice.

coastalchick · 02/09/2017 20:39

@beanhunter - love the cats!!!!

@Flatwhite31 - hope it stops for you soon x

@KerryLeanne84 - did it hurt or was it ok?

TheGrumpySquirrel · 02/09/2017 20:41

I am sorry I've been crap at keeping up. Hugs to you coastal flatwhite and bean Flowers

I'm not really expecting this cycle to work even though we DTD loads.. just been disappointed too many times. I'm 4-6dpo (not really sure as I had 5 days of positive OPK but going by ovulation pain I think 4).
Testing next Friday 8th...

TheGrumpySquirrel · 02/09/2017 20:42

Bean those kitties are the cutest! 😍

TheGrumpySquirrel · 02/09/2017 20:42

Finally back home with my cats 🐱 holiday was great but it's always good to be home

KerryLeanne84 · 02/09/2017 21:02

Agree grumpy squirrel, home is always the best!

It didn't hurt much coastal chick but it was uncomfortable at first. He was aware that we might have to stop but it was okay

UnicornsandRainbows1 · 02/09/2017 21:18

I think mine was a bit like that. It didn't hurt as such (or at least not as much as what I thought it would) but it was very... It's hard to pinpoint or put in to words. It was just very different but I don't know how exactly.

I found that the more I did it afterwards the more it felt the same but I have no clue what was up Hmm

Flatwhite31 · 03/09/2017 06:02

Morning everyone. We head home today, which I'm looking forward to to, but also dreading. We've only spent one night at home (and most of that evening was spent coming home from hospital) since it all happened, so I'm not sure how I'll feel.

Horrible question, but when did you all start pregnancy testing for a negative? I bought some strips on eBay while I was away, so they will be waiting for me Sad.

beanhunter · 03/09/2017 07:42

Flat I can offer some advice here. I've just spoken to my consultant and he suggested after surgical management there is no need to test. However I tested a 2 weeks and was v positive and at 3 was much fainter. I'll prob test again at 4 if period hasn't arrived. Hope that helps.

coastalchick · 03/09/2017 07:42

@Flatwhite31 - lots of love x I think I'll start testing when I stop bleeding - UFC we can't DTD until then anyway I reckon I'll just get frustrated if get negative result before then as know I'll want to start on OPK's

NoCatsHere · 03/09/2017 07:50

Morning all. It's my birthday today, 39. And woke up feeling mixed emotions...I should have been 2 weeks away from meeting my first baby, or 3 months from the second. Feels odd knowing I've been pregnant twice this year and now nothing since. Was really hoping to be pregnant again by now... however had a lovely day with friends yesterday and knowing I definitely wasn't pregnant let my hair down a little and drank some fizz so that was nice. Have a nice day planned already with my 2 boys, and feel insanely grateful for them. Going to keep going for another year and call it a day when I hit 40 and be grateful for what I do have I think. Funny how birthdays make you feel isn't it?

coastal I had medical management and it was ok - i had slightly messed up cycles for a couple of months after but I know everyone is different.

flat I tested after a week but didn't get a negative until after 2 weeks.

coastalchick · 03/09/2017 07:58

@NoCatsHere - happy birthday and glad you are focusing on the good. Lots of love x

OH's sister being rather insensitive and sending round pics of her kids (bearing in mind last Sat when we didn't know anything was wrong we were talking about whether ours would look similar to her) on the what's app group we are on. Have left the group now but FFS - are people so stupid?! Unless of course it was deliberate

Flatwhite31 · 03/09/2017 08:08

Thanks ladies. That's really helpful advice. @beanhunter that's interesting you were told that! I was told at the hospital and by my GP to test until negative. It's strange that there's conflicting advice depending on where you are seen. I think I'll do a test when I stop bleeding. I'm on day 9 now and no signs of it stopping unfortunately!

Happy birthday @NoCatsHere. Are you doing anything for it? My birthday is the week we would have had our 20 week scan, so I doubt I'll be up for celebrating.

Ekphrasis · 03/09/2017 08:24

Gorgeous cats bean!

Happy birthday nocats!

Really not handling things - I must not poas. But it is reassuring. But then not. My frer this morning was not as dark as yesterday but my Sainsbury's was darker. I did test in the afternoon yesterday though, and I've read some get more in the pm.

Either way it means nothing really. I know 24 hours is pointless! I just had such strong progression with my son (though used stronger tests, ASDA,) and I'm sure with the preg in feb it was too but I used Sainsbury's and then one step then. Definitely stronger than my chemical though. But again means nothing! I hate this :(

Will pull myself together. I just wish I'd managed last cycle instead and this week was hidden in the summer holidays and not the first week back to school!

Ekphrasis · 03/09/2017 08:25

Actually, stupid me, it's not even 24 hours apart. More like 16.

Gah!

Impatientmummy36 · 03/09/2017 08:35

Coastal I think some people are so wrapped up in their own lives that they show some sympathy at first, and then as their life moves on with their day to day troubles they forget (whereas for you of course, what you've just been through is ever present and still everything to you...).

I only told my oldest friends who said all the right things at first, but then nothing really since. I put it down to it being because I wasn't very far along in pregnancy, and thought if I'd been further along people would be more concerned for me (and rightly so, it would be worse of course.) But it's nice when someone just says 'hi, how are you feeling today?' Isn't it. Who knows, human nature I guess. One friend, the one who I'd told first, text me from her holiday a week later saying her life was shit and everything goes wrong for her, because her case had gone awol and turned up next day (this is bearing in mind we'd cancelled our holiday only the week before as was due to fly day after we went to EPU, my LO got chicken pox as well so all things considered we couldn't go). I read it and thought, well I'd love to still be pregnant now, on holiday or not, with or without a missing case!

Your OH sounds very supportive though. Mine was great at first, and is very supportive in general, but mostly In a practical sense. After his initial upset when it happened, he looked after me for a couple of days and then moved on fast. He focusses on the positives 'it's fine, it'll happen for us' we'll try again straight away, etc etc. When sometimes you know all of the positives, but you just want how you feel acknowledging. Hope you're ok today x

Impatientmummy36 · 03/09/2017 08:39

Happy birthday nocats :) xx

Flatwhite31 · 03/09/2017 08:44

@Impatientmummy36 you put that last bit of your post so well. Yes, focusing on the positives and looking forward is fine, but sometimes you just want those around you to acknowledge how you're feeling now.

On a funny note, my passport was being tricky at the e-gate border control thing at the airport, and the woman trying to help me asked if I was under 18! I roared with laughter - I'm 32 next month! Hahaha!

weasledee · 03/09/2017 08:51

Hi flatwhite, I'm just a few weeks ahead of you post medical management. I got a negative test after 2 weeks and period came just over 4 weeks. It seems to be longer than normal, just waiting for it to stop so I can start the ovulation sticks!
Happy birthday nocats! I can so relate to your message! I too have 2 boys and said we would not try for anymore after my 40th, well I'm 41 and still going to have one last try for number 3! :)