Flatwhite, I hope you have a good holiday. I think it's just what you need.
When I had my miscarriage and subsequent surgery, I sprnt a good few weeks weeping. At work several people are pregnant so I kept running off to loo. Every time people were kind to me I cried.
Me and my husband wrote letters to our twins and placed them in a memory box (along with the 500 pregnancy tests I did). I needed closure and that offered some.
It does get better I promise. For me, I hired a personal trainer and picked that as my focus. Bleeding had left me weak and in another cruel twist I had started to get a bump. I knew I wanted to get strong. It helped me massively.
I also turned to mindfulness and that really did help me too.
I did have moments of anger and sadness but it got less and less. Eventually I became able to tell people about my miscarriage without crying and having snot bubbles (now when I tell people I just have a slight crack in my voice that I can usually hide)
Getting my first period was another milestone... as was a negative test. Each milestone made me slightly better and more like the old me. I got pregnant again 1st cycle after (although it remains to be seen how this one is going).
Enjoy your holiday, try to find another focus. dont feel bad if you cry,just know things will get better.