Temp Buds 5

[minxi]

Seaside72 - tbc CD3 LP13 (13th cycle - lucky 13 I hope?! )
LondonLottie - tbc CD4 LP10 (6th cycle ttc)
Rahrah - tbc CD7 LP13(5th cycle)
Fresco - tbc CD8
weepootleflump - tbc CD8 (4th cycle ttc)
Duchesse- tbc CD9 LP13/14? (6th cycle since m/c, 43rd cycle overall)
lissie - tbc CD14 (1st cycle since ep)
Mum03 ? tbc LP14 (4th cycle ttc)
Gracie14 - tbc CD15 (7th cycle ttc)
Rattling - tbc CD15 LP9 (15th cycle ttc)
insywinsyspider - tbc cd17 (2nd cycle ttc)
Ready - tbc CD20 5dpo LP12 (7th cycle ttc)
Minxi - 36.98 cd25 8 DPO LP11 (9th cycle ttc with focus - off depo 26months!!!!)
MrsMcJnr ? tbc cd25 (9th cycle TTC, Cycle 8, BFP then Miscarried @ 10 weeks) (Lp norm 10 ? 12 days)

Set up a new thread - old one was too long!!

FF has moved my ovulation to cd17 so am still 8dpo.... don't feel too positive about this month either roll on to af starting so I can start the clomid hopefully that will work for me!!

I'm still lurking..lol

Why are you so cheesed off, whats happened?

So many little stupid things all building up and pushing me to the brink of tears

They are all pathetic as well, so don't say I didn't warn you, but you did ask...

1?A friend emailed about looking forward to us coming back home in the summer, and at the end wrote "keep getting the feeling you will turn up? pregnant!?. They don?t know we are ttc, and I don?t want them to know. I sent a big reply to the other stuff, but neglected to respond to the pregnancy comment, and quick as a flash an email came back saying ?you are not denying the pregnancy thing then??. So I had to email back and say ?I can assure you I am not pregnant, hardly the sensible thing to do with all the uncertainty in our life at the moment? (That is our stock answer if anyone asks ? it usually works, as people can understand it) BUT the response to that was an emailed selection of random baby pictures from the internet that I am sure where meant to be a light-hearted attempt at making me feel broody! MY HEART WAS JUST ACHING but I couldn?t say how inappropriate it was, and how insensitive they were being ? they aren?t to know are they? But I just wanted to scream ?I am doing my best here, and it just isn?t good enough ? I am a big fat failure who can?t get pregnant ? and now you are rubbing my nose in it ? thanks!?

2?I keep having pregnancy related dreams. But in none of them am I ever pregnant the worst one, was 2 nights ago, I dreamt my MUM had a newborn girl, and was neglecting it. I took the baby and tried to look after her, but I couldn?t even do that, the poor baby got sick and I panicked. I couldn?t even look after a baby

3? Everywhere I look there are pregnant bellies and newborn babies and it is really starting to hurt when I see them.

4? This is the silliest one yet, DH was in the shower this morning, and was listening to some music, and I said ?who is this? I like it? ? I kid you not, the band are called ULTRASOUND - can you believe that? Everywhere I turn I am reminded of my inability to conceive! From tv adverts for Cow&Gate with babies, Pampers with babies, Pregnancy tests; To driving behind a bus with the ClearBlue billboard slapped on the back. It feels like a conspiracy.

Sorry girls. I know I am normally the pain in the rear positivity princess, but the polar opposite is just as much of a pain I am sure. I really feel that I am losing the plot.

Ok... reading it back I feel like a total and utter muppet (borrowed your word Minxi, hope you don't mind chick, it's perfect!) Sorry to go on and on and on. I best go now - lots to do.

Ready - sorry you're feeling so down at the moment. It's really hard when friends are trying to say the best things (how much they think you should be a mother) and don't realise how much they are hurting you.

Never heard of Ultrasound - were they any good? Will we have to prepare for a huge poster campaign?

I can survive without the "positivity princess" for a while (AF due at the beginning of May, I'd like her back for then ). I think it's your turn to find a bit from the people on here.

Oh Ready.... We use to get exactly the same when we were TTC... people were like hurry up...we are on number two now etc etc... and all I ever wanted to do was stab them sharply in the eye ball and say Hello!!! we are bloody trying you arse!

People really don't understand, especially if they have just caught at the drop of a hat.

In some ways we are lucky now TTC, as people would not dare mention anything about TTC due to what we have been through.. I suppose its makes people think twice... however if we don't catch soon I'm sure there will be occasions where people will ask when we will try again etc etc... people just don't think, in fact I will go as far as saying some are near brain dead when it comes to sensitive issues.

In regards to seeing everything, it is natural as you are so aware of everything. If you were not TTC you would never notice these things... It's totally natural feelings... but I know not nice ones... felling so annoyed, frustrated and bitter some times..ARRGGG we all feel it promise!

{{{{{{HUGS}}}}}}

Ready - you are no a muppet, it is perfectly acceptable to feel down...I know when I was trying for both my DS's (having taken 9 months with both) that I felt I was starting to go mad and there were babies or baby related things everywhere!! and now I am worse this time around !!...this morning had cardio tennis and at the end (I was with two girls I was out with on saturday night!) the tennis teacher started going on about everyone seems to be having three at the moment must be the new two, which was fine today the conversation been two days earlier probably would have used the raquet and her head as the ball...arghghghgh!!
So don't beat yourself up about it it is normal and it wouldn't be normal if you were so oh well never mind next month if you see what I mean....{{{{hugs}}}}} but we are all totally with you on this one.... and well look at me last saturday night (well it was a good job you didn't see me but imagine after far too many wines what it would be like!)

Ready - I have come here often enough to "rant" as rah put it, so please - it really is your turn for a change. Your post was clear and I can really see why you are hurting so much. I hate it when we feel that the whole world is trying to tell us to be a certain way - you should be married - you should have children - your children should be perfect and succeed at everything. It is so unfair that these images are shoved at us and we are made to feel like failures if we have not achieved what is expected. Normally I feel like it is only me feeling like this every month - but this month you have expressed yourself so eloquently that I feel much better !!!! Sorry that does not help you, but I know that you will bounce back to your normal happy self at the end of the 2ww. Of course if you are pg you could end up staying this hormonal way for another 9 or so months.... So chin up know that this is just your hormones running riot on you again, and get ready to smile again. If this does not help me feel free to beat me up in this virtual realm, I can take it! Or go punch a pillow, that rather than your dh - he might complain!

ready - you made me cry. as the queen of positivity you are allowed to have an off day or two.
when we were ttc we had some friends that asked us virtually every other week if i was pg yet. i can't remember how many times i explained to the woman that i had super long cycles so 'no' i wasn't pg and there was no chance i would be in the next few weeks and we were REALLY trying and they would be the first to know etc.etc. i got SO pissed off with them for being so blatantly insensitive, that we still haven't told them now! we haven't seen them for a while so whenever they ask i just change the subject! she asked me again yesterday by text message, but i am still annoyed at how insensitive she was.

just remember how hard you have tried this month, all that effort has to pay off, surely!

see how much we all love you ready!!!

Minxi - ° CD2 LP11 (11th cycle???)
Rahrah - ° CD7 LP13(6th cycle)
seaside72 - ° CD8 LP12 (14th cycle)
duchesse - ° CD11 - LP14 (7th cycle since m/c, 44th cycle ftc)
MrsMc ? 36.1° CD15 LP 10-12 (10th cycle)
Rattling - ° CD17 LP10 (16th cycle)
Ready - 36.70° CD23 7DPO LP12 (8th cycle)
CityAngel - ° CD25 LP10 (8th cycle) AF due CD30
NappyValley - 36.79° CD27 8DPO LP14(8th cycle)
iwillbe - ° CD27 12dpo (10th cycle)
beansprout - ° CD30 15dpo LP? (11th cycle) BFP

but had had a sudden surge of adrenalin before taking temp so unusually high.

ready those all sound like EXTREMELY legitimate reasons for getting upset. It is really hard when ttc and everyone keeps asking, especially if you recently married (MrsMc). Having a fixed response is a really good way of dealing with it though people you see everyday may be more supportive and not say anyhting if you say you are trying and having difficulties. I feel for you big hugs.

MrsMcJn sorry work is adding an extra level of stress to an already stressful situation. I wish there was an easier way to handle it, but sometimes there is not. I am sure it is very difficult when there is noone there you can confide in. As you say when people are at a different stage in life it is very hard for them to relate.

rahrah counselling is a great idea. I happened to be studying on a counselling skills course when ttc ds and it was such a help with having someone to really listen to me for 20 minutes each week during practice. By the end of the course 3 of us were pregnant! Do you know what style your counselor is and are they properly qualified? member of BACP or similar? If they are they should have explained during the first session how things were going to work, what level of confidentiality they can give and also what compalints procedure is available. This shows they are acting ethically and professionally. Sorry if I am soundling over protective but it is important. Sorry it is so expensive!

minxi sorry you are full flow. Good luck wiht the clomid and I second that opinion that temping is NOT obsessive. I think it is only getting to that point when, if you don't temp one morning you feel like it is the end of the world.

To everyone else you are all amazing, strong and special people and here is a big HUG to all.

greedy* Make them wait and see how long it take before she is equally insensitive and asks if you have put on weight!! Hope it is going ok 4 you.

iwillbe - 36.77° CD1 LP11 (11th cycle)
Minxi - ° CD2 LP11 (11th cycle???)
Rahrah - ° CD7 LP13(6th cycle)
seaside72 - ° CD8 LP12 (14th cycle)
duchesse - ° CD11 - LP14 (7th cycle since m/c, 44th cycle ftc)
MrsMc ? 36.1° CD15 LP 10-12 (10th cycle)
Rattling - ° CD17 LP10 (16th cycle)
Ready - 36.70° CD23 7DPO LP12 (8th cycle)
CityAngel - ° CD25 LP10 (8th cycle) AF due CD30
NappyValley - 36.79° CD27 8DPO LP14(8th cycle)
beansprout - ° CD30 15dpo LP? (11th cycle) BFP

hi girls

slightly peed off today and im sure i dont need to state why, im not even upset about afs arrival im just so god damn angry!

anyway moving on swiftly.....

hey mum03!! hows it going? im fine thanks and looking forward to spending another month with you girls!!

ready - your mind is playing some crazy tricks on you at the minute with your dreams - it sounds like your brain is on overdrive and all of your anxieties are being expressed through your dreams hopefully your bad dreams will go away soon - you will have to talk nicely to the sandman and ask him for some extra sleepy dust and baby dust while he is at it to chill you out i am totally with you on the bumps everywhere drama - i did say this about a week ago in a post.

mrsmcjnr - hello!! glad you had a nice weekend away but what a shame you have to go back to work and face this kind of treatment, try and rise above it and look after number one at the end of the day. i was getting a little stressed with the temps only because i hadnt charted properly before so it was more curiosity more than anything to make sure my temps were doing what they should. i will be far more chilled out this month temping and i also have somthing to compare with now - so im slightly proud of myself for one completed month of temps

my bf has announced that she is ttc and she is looking at it as more of a competition - when she told me she said "i wonder who will get pg first" with a smug look on her face - i just know she thinks its going to be her cos ive been trying all this time! i know she doesnt mean it in a malicious way - but im afraid anything pregnancy related close to home is not somthing i can handle at the moment.

this month i am throwing myself into getting fit and losing a stone ( i am on mrsmcjnrs thread but have so far managed to stay pretty much stable lose then gain etc) but i really am going to try! i am hoping creating a focus for this month will take a weeny bit of pressure of ttc away.

rah - nice to see you popping in i have tried to give mn a break a couple of times before but i always find myself back on within a cpl of days. look after yourself x

well i have rambled on enough now i think, i am off to do my workout dvd - and i have just had sliced apple dipped in straberry yougurt for lunch mmmmmmm

tata x

Oh Ready hon, you?re allowed to be low sometimes I?m sure we?ve all been guilty in the past of thinking it?s really easy and we and everyone else will fall when we want to. Maybe its just me and recent events but if someone said that to me now I?d tell them the truth. I?d love to be but I?m not so please don?t talk about it because it hurts me. The dreams are natural, they are just an outpost for your daily thoughts and as for bumps and babies, think how many people walking down the street have neither, works for me!

Thanks NappyValley

Hello Iwillbe sorry hon you are now a pro-temper! I know how you feel about your BF my BF did exactly the same and fell first and when I told her I was too she was so excited as we were 20 weeks apart and would have been on mat leave together, then I lost my baby and she cries off every meeting we set up, I think she can?t face me her baby is due in 2 weeks and I so wanted to see her nursery and get excited for her but she won?t let me be a part of it. People can be odd can?t they. Bet your BF isn?t as gorgeous as you hence her nipper won?t be as cute ? competition won! I?m going to try hard with the weight too.

Hello to everyone else

(Ready - hope you are ok. you are allowed to feel these things.sometimes others just dont understand what ttc so hard feels like, hun.hoping you are ok )

Hello there ladies,

Now I'm sure that DD2 is sleeping in her bed own all night and I get an undisturbed sleep I have decided to start temping. I have a BBT which comes with a chart but woiuld prefer to chart online, any tips?

Hi goingfor3-
I would try fertilityfriend.com as it is free. I used it myself and found it very easy to put the info in etc... others on here have paid for the Toni whatshername software, I did the free trial for a month and then used the FF one- which I thought was pretty similar. Good luck, glad to hear DD sleeping well in own bed.

How's everyone else today?

Ready- chin up love. I think we all get over sensitive to baby stuff when TTC. I know I couldnt stop seeing PG bellies and little babies when I was in the thick of TTCing. But (sorry irritating words coming) now I am PG I have almost forgotton about all the shit and pain I went through whilst TTC. Now I am just getting paranoid about DP not fancying me etc (feeling fat and wobbly rather than proud and pregnant)... so my emotions have just got fixed on something else .

Lots of love as always
xx

Thank You All SO Much

You have no idea how great it feels to have all of you girls to talk to.

I am feeling a little brighter today ? been keeping very busy! Pre-menstrual cramps have started though, so although I am feeling more chipper ? I am certain this month is not to be ? Cycle 9 here we come!

Rattling - Ultrasound have split up apparently, and DH says probably not famous enough for a poster campaign even when they were together. So you won?t be faced with that!! I think I will be able to muster up some positive vibes for you ? though, I really hope you won?t need them!!

Rah - You are right, some people just don?t understand! And I know you girls all feel what I am feeling. I am sorry that you have wanted to keep a low profile just at the moment, I really hope that you have a lovely time in Wales. Thank you so much for the hugs I needed them!

Minxi - LOL at your tennis racquet and the teacher?s head!! It does give me hope to hear that you tried for 9 months with both your children. It makes me remember that while it feels like an eternity right now ? it could well be perfectly normal! Thanks chick.

Mum03 - Thank you for saying I was eloquent. I am glad that my post made you feel a bit better. You are right, no doubt I will be back to my normal pain-in-the-rear self by the end of the 2ww. And you will all be wishing I was ranting again

Greedy - I am so sorry that I made you cry. Not a good thing to do to a pregnant lady! I am glad that you haven?t told that Insensitive Twonk about minigreedy! I genuinely think that people just don?t realise ? they just assume that it is the easiest thing in the world, and they also think pregnancies and baby talk is a public thing ? and it isn?t. But then I suppose you only really learn that when you struggle.

NappyValley - Luckily we live miles away from family and majority of friends, so we don?t have to have our stock answer prepared for a daily basis. That would be tough! I know what you are saying about people being more supportive if they knew we were trying ? but of the very few people that do know ? I sense the curiosity in their voices and pauses on the phone ? and if that was doubled or trebled ? I would never talk to anyone. I feel it is a private thing at the moment. In time I may change.

Iwillbe - You are so right, my mind is on overdrive. I haven?t had dreamless sleep for a while now! You did say that about bumps didn?t you ? it?s good to know I am not the only green eyed monster ? Very sorry to hear that your BF is treating ttc as a competition. How very insensitive of her. I agree with what MrsMc said hang in there honey!

MrsMc - You are right, there are plenty of people on the street with no pregnancy bellies, or babies ? perhaps I should start looking at Men only! Haha! How are you feeling? How was your wine evening with your friend? I agree one night of Rioja after a good day is not going to matter!

Scorpio - Thanks chick!! It?s so nice of you to pop in and post! Hope you are doing ok.

Goingfor3 - Honeyapple is right, fertility friend is free. It?s a mix of FF and TCOYF software users on here. I use FF, and it is fine for my purposes, it depends how many other factors you are going to be monitoring? I think the TCOYF charts look prettier, to be honest. But they both do pretty much the same thing. Will you be joining us ladies with banter as well?

Honeyapple - Sorry you are worrying about DP not fancying you ? I am sure he does ? pregnant women are often alluring aren?t they!! I?m sure you look wonderful! I know you are right, when (not if!!) I fall pregnant, the timescale will fade away!

Special mention to Seaside - chick, I hope you are ok ? and we can?t wait to have you back when you are feeling less discombobulated Big hugs.

Everyone else - hope all is well!!

Just realised I am first to post temp today! Where is everyone

iwillbe - ° CD2 LP11 (11th cycle)
Minxi - ° CD3 LP11 (11th cycle???)
Rahrah - ° CD8 LP13(6th cycle)
seaside72 - ° CD9 LP12 (14th cycle)
duchesse - ° CD12 - LP14 (7th cycle since m/c, 44th cycle ftc)
MrsMc ? ° CD16 LP 10-12 (10th cycle)
Rattling - ° CD18 LP10 (16th cycle)
Ready - 36.70° CD24 8DPO LP12 (8th cycle)
CityAngel - ° CD26 LP10 (8th cycle) AF due CD30
NappyValley - ° CD28 9DPO LP14(8th cycle)
beansprout - ° CD31 16dpo LP? (11th cycle) BFP

Beansprout - Any news?????

Hello ready - i'm here! don't give up hope yet!

Hope everyone else is doing ok - really miss you all lots - I so hope that you all come and join us soon. Silly thing to say really, as I know you all hope the same thing, but hopefully you'll know what I mean.

Big hugs, you sound like you need them.

take care all
xxx

Discombobulated - that is a most excellent word!

Been a busy panda today as had a night out at the Opera (v cultured don't ya know ) with DH last night and stayed with parents. It is a v rare occurrence to get time out with DH so very nice. Handy having parents nearer London. We live on the south coast if anyone cares! Which brings me to a question - does "seaside" live by the seaside?

Ready you get bounce back award of the month. You are totally right it is a private thing. You know what works best for you guys. p.s. I'd go with RahRah's sharp stick technique personally

Iwillbe - really sorry about the whole competition thing. I hope you win!

MrsMcJnr - hang in there at work and if all else fails draw rude doodles of your colleges during meetings, just make sure you destroy the notes afterwards.

It looks like this month is going to be another really long cycle 33 days.

Does anyone else ever think "well that was a waste of Folic Acid tablets". I cheat and only take then from CD14.

Don't feel at all positive about this month but for once much more relaxed about it all - somebody point me back to this in 5 days time!!

Roll on some weekend sunshine.

Hey girls can you believe that I forgot to temp this morning?! on such crucial day too but it was because DH refused me last night and is in another stinker tonight so the fact that I got a +OPK today just rubs salt in the wound. Cruel trick of nature that we need assistance from men on this really. He seems to have a short memory about the guilt he felt for not putting more effort in before we got the BFP we lost. Plus he knows the timetable and the need for a BFP before June if we are to go on my Dad's B'day trip in April. Selfish B leaving me with all the stress

Ready - hope you are feeling much, much better.

Nappy - I like your style!

Oh bummer if DH won't (those of sensitive nature avert eyes) put out. I found that if I used the ultimate weapon of a BJ that usually got him in the mood (when ttc DS).

Sorry to be personal, but have you guys talked about loss of BFP together. It could be that he is still not ready to go for it again and is making excuses/defenses because being less in touch wiht feelings - i.e. from Mars, he may not realise he is doing this, or how it makes you feel.

Big hugs.

P.S. ambush him early in the morning when he is still half asleep .

iwillbe - ° CD2 LP11 (11th cycle)
Minxi - ° CD3 LP11 (11th cycle???)
Jess1996 - CD3 35.95° (3rd cycle since m/c, 8th cycle total)
Rahrah - ° CD8 LP13(6th cycle)
seaside72 - ° CD9 LP12 (14th cycle)
duchesse - ° CD12 - LP14 (7th cycle since m/c, 44th cycle ftc)
MrsMc ? ° CD16 LP 10-12 (10th cycle)
Rattling - ° CD18 LP10 (16th cycle)
Ready - 36.70° CD24 8DPO LP12 (8th cycle)
CityAngel - ° CD26 LP10 (8th cycle) AF due CD30
NappyValley - ° CD28 9DPO LP14(8th cycle)
beansprout - ° CD31 16dpo LP? (11th cycle) BFP

Hi guys,

Thought I'd rejoin you again if that's ok. I've had a miserable couple of months, I'll just summarise:

1st cycle post m/c - temps erratic, lots of abdominal pain (treated for infection). Two week AF!

2nd cycle post m/c - lots of EWCM at expected time, but no temp rise. Thought it was annovulation. Gave up for a week. Started taking temps again. Temps were up, but of course had no idea when I OV'd. Then had some pregnancy symptoms, but unfortunately AF arrived.

I was feeling pretty down for a couple of days, but then I thought about the positives.

1. I got pregnant at the second month of properly trying (didn't do the deed at the right time for the first couple of cycles).

1. Looking back though my charts it seems that I do OV and have a 14 day LP.

1. I am still only 28.

1. My missed m/c was probably because I had monoamniotic identical twins and the m/c risk was always much higher.

So, I've decided I need to stop being pathetic and be positive. After all, compared to many people ttc I am actually quite lucky. It just hurts so much seeing all the pregnant women at work.

Anyway, I hope you are all ok. It's good to see that there is a BFP this month. Let's hope for many more BFPs.

I have discovered something interesting recently. I always worry about my low temps (last month I got down to 35.2!). Then I discovered that if I take my temp twice, it is always higher the 2nd time. So now I put the thermometer in my mouth for a while before switching it on. Then my temps were more consistent and quite a bit higher (I even reached the giddy heights of 36.5 last week). Maybe I sleep in a cold room and the thermometer just gets too cold!)

NappyValley - 36.68° CD1 LP?????(9th cycle)
iwillbe - ° CD3 LP11 (11th cycle)
Minxi - ° CD4 LP11 (11th cycle???)
Jess1996 - CD3 35.95° (3rd cycle since m/c, 8th cycle total)
Rahrah - ° CD9 LP13(6th cycle)
seaside72 - ° CD10 LP12 (14th cycle)
duchesse - ° CD13 - LP14 (7th cycle since m/c, 44th cycle ftc)
MrsMc ? ° CD17 LP 10-12 (10th cycle)
Rattling - ° CD19 LP10 (16th cycle)
Ready - 36.70° CD25 9DPO LP12 (8th cycle)
CityAngel - ° CD27 LP10 (8th cycle) AF due CD30
beansprout - ° CD32 17dpo LP? (11th cycle) BFP

Morning all and hi to Jess. SOunds like a few bumpy months. Sorry about M/C. Sounds like you are being very practical and positive. Hate to be all soppy, but make sure you have dealt with your feelings too.

Wellllll I have no idea what my body is up to as that was the shortest LP ever had. Hey Ho with the number of stomach bugs I have had it is no surprise, but I was not expecting AF to arrive today, so luckily had emergency supplies. I work with only men and just walked into the office and yelled "bollocks" and then whenasked "having a bad morning" I decided to break the golden rule of working with men (never mention the P word) and announced "period has just started" and as I grabbed a tampon and flounced out of the room again I said "well not pregnant this month".

It is not a surprise to them as they know I want another sproglet and they all have babies too.

So as you can see I am beyond being coy and secretive, but then again WHEN i get my BFP, if it is anyhting like last time they will know instantly, as I have a very sedentry job and the pale face and constant retching and guzzling ginger beer will give it away!!!

Doing OK and feeling positive for next month, if my cycle settles down. Might be a bit depressed later AND I was inspired by all this talk of weight loss to abandon my choc and beer diet and brought a salad to work!! Bummer.

TTFN