Thread 30, TTC #1 | Hilda hopefuls are still riding the shag wagon

[Jamon]

Calling all OPK-ers, Temp-ers, Clomid-ers, Femara-ers, IUI-ers, IVF-ers and anyone else on the TTC #1 Bus.


We've been going a while now so the novelty has well and truly worn off and we're slightly battle scarred and bruised in the cervix area. We don't get a lot of baby dust in these here parts, we just keep it legs spread and fingers crossed (LSFX). We love a baby bomb from a prior bus-mate but if we get told to 'just relax and enjoy it' ONE MORE TIME you will get a punch in the face!


Hop on board, post your stats and prepare to be dazzled by the wealth of TTC knowledge we long-timeys have to share...


Key:
HS - have/had sex
GOS - good old shag
ELH - enthusiastic lavatory happenings
LSFX - legs spread, fingers crossed

I managed to miss loads earlier. harriet I'm sorry you are feeling so rubbish, that is quite a cocktail you are taking. It's not fair we have to stuff ourselves with this crap!

LSFX otters! I'm up and down to be honest, these last few days of the cycle are just the pits. I already feel bitter that I took clomid and put myself through that for nothing!

flora I'm sorry he is feeling down, it's a massive blow. For men I think their sperm is sacred or something, it seems to effect their very manhood. The morphology thing is ridiculous too - as they changed the criteria some years ago and some professionals think they've made it all too strict - so even the tiniest defect is now counted as 'abnormal'. I don't know if it will help to remind your DH that its completely normal for men to produce an awful lot of 'abnormal' sperm - only 4% normal form is considered normal - which is hardly any. The fact he has good count and motility is definitely something to focus on and be positive about.

Massive hug for baby bomb flash and for facebook bomb mouse

My pregnant colleague - who knows how long I've been trying - messaged me from home to complain today about how much her ankles had swollen up. I had to stare at the message a while before being able to reply politely!

and a huge fingers crossed for you kerry, I really hope its worked this time xx

I have luckily managed to get an endocrinologist appointment for Monday afternoon. Does anybody know what the fuss with getting a sore throat in the anti thyroid meds is??

Fx for you pjs!! And also to you rabiya.
*
Flora* i hope you can help DH see that it can't be controlled and at least you know how to move forward.

Mouse thank you for the help offer!!

Sorry for the baby bomb flash.

Basset, good news that you managed to get an appointment so quickly.

Pyjamas, wishing you so much luck for tomorrow! FWIW, I work from home one day a month because I get medication delivered which needs to go straight in the fridge and it's never been an issue (and I've never disclosed what it's for). Most people seem to be far too worried about crossing some sort of boundary to ask questions!

Kerry, I'm keeping everything crossed for you. You seem so calm!

Jam, I'm sorry things are so tough for you still. I wish there was some way to wave a magic wand and make all this shit go away. You don't deserve it at all.

Good luck otters!

So sorry for all the baby bombs and insensitive comments. If it wasn't so hot, I'd give each and every one of you a hug. We'll get through this somehow. AF arrived here properly today so we're on to cycle 19.

Sorry about AF kath Are you doing ok? You're right - they probably won't ask for much more detail at work - too awkward!

Sorry about AF kath this is cycle 18 so I'm not far behind you!

basset good news that you got your appointment so early. Hope it goes as well as it can be

pjs good luck tomorrow. We're all here to hold your hand if you need.

Sorry for the baby bomb flash and mouse

kerry fingers crossed for a good progesterone result. Yes I had to give the injection myself which was nerve wracking. Luckily I have a nurse friend who was working and in the area so she popped in and gave me the injection! Will be getting my progesterone checked next week. Hope it's going to be >30!

Basset the sore throat is a sign that the medication isn't working or overworking. It can lead to complications that can effect your liver. When you see your dr ask for a follow up in 2 months. That's the minimum they will usually see if medication is working and your levels to be normal. Please be prepared for them to tell you to pause TTC until your levels are normal (I don't want to scare you but my dr was really honest and said it can take up to a year but with correct dosage my levels were normal in 4 months), sending massive hugs. I know I've probably just said the worse thing possible but you can get through this and hopefully it leads to a healthy pregnancy in just a few months. X

My spotting has gotten worse so I'm classing my AF as starting tomorrow. Disappointed at the short 25 day cycle, I felt so hopeful too, even just for another 27 dayer if I didn't get the unicorn BFP (is that even a thing now I'm on cycle 8 really)

Ahhh that's good to know mouse. I have already been told to stop trying. My health is more important. I already have a blood test request form for a months time and then a gp appointment the week after plus the endo appointment and the scan in 3-4 weeks now if the endo doesn't bring it forward. So sorry af is arriving.

Hugs kath.

I might still hang around realised my decision this morning was a bit of an over reaction to the news this morning

Oh that's good Otters! It's always good when a pro is involved!

Thanks for the fingers crossed for me everyone Jamon Kath et al! I am not calm at all tbh. Expecting period sunday or monday. I think I am feeling better from the thyroxin though which is good, I seem to have more energy.

I've also had MANY preggos complaining about the heat on fb.

I saw an acronym that I liked KTFU - knocked the fuck up! :)

Hope it all goes well today pyjamas

Sorry kath I hope you're okay? You seem to manage it so well

Glad to hear you've got specialists looking after you basset it sounds like they have a plan to get this sorted, I hope it's not long until you're trying again

Sorry mouse fx for a better cycle next month with no AF

I'm really struggling at the moment, I'm worried about how low I am most of the time. I cry almost every day and I feel pretty hopeless. Reading this even worries me but I just seemed to have slipped into this awful mind state and I don't know how to get out. I think I need to see my GP.

Can totally understand how you feel jamon. I went away for a week with my mum and other family members recently and cried every day and felt absolutely dreadful, even more so because I should've been enjoying myself and feeling relaxed but felt anything but. Im just sick of trying to pretend im ok and of trying to find distractions when there's a massive massive hole in my life. Married life for me has been nearly two years of two miscarriages while every single friend around me gets pregnant and it's absolutely exhausting being so happy for everyone else while you're desperately struggling to cope. I
was thinking about going to doctors for anti depressants but then I'm worried they'll affect ivf and wouldn't want to tell the clinic to find out in case it meant I couldn't have it. Since the last baby bomb and subsequent daily watsapp messages I've just had a sick feeling in my stomach and just can't get rid of it. Just feel so shit and so sad all the bloody time.

Hugs for you Chlo and Jam. Really feel for you. Jam I think if you're worried about the way you feel going to the GP is definitely a good idea. Chlo if you're worried about medication, have you thought about counselling? Might be helpful for what you've been through already and to help with the intensity of IVF.

Yesterday's baby announcement really hit me, I haven't been able to stop thinking about it, and had the second wave this morning for people who weren't here yesterday. I can't even listen to it, I just went upstairs and stood in the loo. It's making me a sad person. I even wondered if there is a job I could do that guarantees no pregnancy announcements. I can't concentrate on anything, all I think about is getting pregnant. It's miserable.

Thanks flash. Really feel for you working in an office and the inevitable baby bombs and chat that follows. There's just no avoiding it and it's horrible because all you want to do is join in and it's so crappy that it makes you feel sad. Does anyone at work know that you're struggling? We've been to see a counsellor and it did help but think I'm at a stage where I feel like it's a bit of a waste of time for me. I go, feel better, get in a positive place and then someone baby bombs me or like last week we got invited to our friends baby's 1st birthday party and we would be only ones without children and I go back to feeling sad again. I know it sounds negative but all the yoga, reflexology etc is good and has helped me but it doesn't change the situation if you know what I mean. I think the way forward is to just focus on ivf and our marriage really, try to turn all the upset and sadnsss into positive energy and commitment and dedication to the cause so to speak. I can't not think about it all the time so think we just need to go for it and try everything we can to make it happen. Anyone else felt/feeling like this?

Exactly that chlo it's why we've had so much sex this month! Every day for the last 5 days. I need to know we're doing everything. Fortunately DH feels the same. At the same time I'm not sure how I'll feel if we do that every month for a few months and nothing happens. At the moment I console myself that we've not always timed it well/done it much. I agree re relaxing etc, I do yoga, run etc so that I feel good whilst coping with the crap not because I think it will minimize the pain/sadness.

Sorry to cut in Basset and Mouse but I'm guessing you're talking about carbimazole and sore throats? If so, this explains it well. Basically it can cause a rare complication where it stops your immune system functioning properly. So any signs of infection eg sore throat, you need to get a blood test to check your immune cells etc are ok.

ducks out again

So I think I am currently ovulating. CD13, had a positive OPK at night on CD11. Still got EWCM but just had strange achey pain in right hip/lower back on the right side. Sadly this is my tubeless side so only a 70 per cent chance of it finding my other tube. LSFX! Should I HS tonight and tomorrow just to be sure? Or keep going until my temps go up? I've never done all this tracking together in one cycle!

Ah I'm not sure what everyone else takes but I'm on 2x 50mg propylthiouracil as it's safe to take during your first trimester of pregnancy. I started medication while I was still pregnant and the drs said there was no point changing the medication.

It's really sad to read so many of you are struggling so badly with how you feel. I used to be like that, and it'll admin, it took me a while to realise I'm not doing myself any favours. When I first got married 8 yrs ago I thought this would be easy. I must admit my absence on here did help while I was going through everything even though it's a lovely support the daily check ins do remind you of not being pregnant. And to constantly be thinking so negatively has a huge effect on how you view other things too. I've also found tracking the minimum helps with stress.

I know I sound like a broken record but we all follow our own path, try not to let someone's good news consume your thoughts for more than is needed. It's ok to be pissed off or upset but when it consumes you that's when you need to step back. A baby is not going to get comfy in an angry, bitter persons womb 😢 you need to be healthy, mind, body and soul.

Sooooooo, get up now. Wherever you are and go find a mirror. Smile at yourself. Remember why you are here and smile at something that makes you happy. If you can't smile then before you can move onwards in your journey you need to find something that makes you smile. Go on... go!!

Oh and for those wondering. Today is CD1. BUT, I have many more chances and as my beloved kwick always says... I am in perfect time. 😘 x

Flash definitely go tonight if you can! I believe egg hangs around for 12-24 hours so can't hurt?!

Sorry to hear that so many ladies are feeling so down at the moment, there is nothing more that I can say other than what Mouse already has, we just need to keep ploughing on through it and just keep remaining positive and hoping.

I sat in a meeting earlier with my former boss and she just stroked her bump the whole time. And she knows that we are struggling. Just goes to show 100% that people do not understand a dot what struggling TTC is like. Luckily I’m moving department tomorrow to a team that is full of men so fx for less baby bombs.

In other news, actually think my GP surgery should be renamed Fawlty Towers – so yesterday I had my 21 day bloods scheduled right after DH appointment about his SA. So after we saw the GP and got DH SA results, she ordered some additional bloods for me – in addition to the 21 day bloods that were originally planned – and as a result the nurse got confused, ignored the initial instruction and didn’t order 21 day bloods!! The other tests have come back fine it seems – my liver and kidneys are functioning but my testosterone level was slightly elevated – perhaps I’m a man?

They are going to do the referral anyway but another month to wait before confirmation on whether I am ovulating!

Think we are going to make a complaint after we’ve had confirmation of the referral – I’m not usually one for complaining but c’mon!!

Chlo I can completely sympathise. Doing yoga meditation swimming reading etc is all just distraction. I want a baby and nothing else comes close.

Mouse bless you thanks for that we definitely needed it xx I will try.

I have actually downloaded an app called Grateful where you record a few things each day that you are thankful for or made you smile. I really recommend it if you are feeling very sad.

Hi girls, I'm dipping back in and my God there's so much to catch up on I feel guilty. Sorry!

Firstly, I'm sorry this is all so shit and there hasn't been any good news on here.

Jam I'm so sorry for how low you're feeling and how this ttc rubbish is affecting many aspects of your life and happiness. I wonder if your friend and colleague being pregnant is tipping you over the edge, I don't blame you though. It's hard not to let it get to you. Hope the GP can help you. That app sounds good, will check it out.

Mouse and Kath I'm sorry for af girls but your positive attitudes are inspiring ❤️ Better luck next month.

Flora Omg how frustrating about your bloods, what idiots! I'm sorry to hear about your dh's low morph too. It really doesn't seem to matter for some people from what I've seen on FF but in other cases it does unfortunately.

Basset sorry about your thyroid news. That must have been a shock. Glad you've got an appointment so soon. Fx they can get you sorted and back to ttc in no time.

Sorry for all the baby bombs Flash, Chlo and others. It never gets easier and I know exactly how you're feeling. Hugs

Last night was a weird one for me. It's such a long story so I'll try and keep it as short as possible. I stayed up late to talk to my closest ttc friend who I've mentioned on here before, she lives in Australia. We spoke for an hour about issues with her husband and him deciding he doesn't want them to have a 6th child despite her losing identical twin girls last July and another baby in March this year. This cycle she charted and they had unprotected sex twice O-6 and once O-5, her husband then used a condom when they had sex O-1 and O night. She's been so mad this tww (definitely not "relaxed") and they've been arguing lots. So after an hour on the phone I mentioned something about when her period arrives as we were like 100% she was out this cycle... Then she dropped it on me that she got a faint line on a cheapy yesterday (19th). In my head I was still thinking oh it must be a dodgy test but then she quickly said I did a FRER an hour later and there was no doubting that line. I actually said... What!?! YOU'RE PREGNANT? HOW EVEN!? I was completely stunned. I was mostly shocked that she took an hour to tell me over the phone and that the whole convo had been about how hard her dh was making things for her and all their issues. So this baby is either an O-5 miracle or the product of him reentering her 30mins later on O-1 after he had ejaculated into a condom. It's actually unbelievable. I choked up a bit on the phone but I was mostly in shock. My other friend summed how I'm feeling up very well... "You've got 5 babies to hold and here you are with a baby your husband doesn't even want after out of this world conception circumstances!! It's really unfair to every women who cries herself to sleep begging for the chance to be a mother JUST ONCE!"

Kerry I'm rooting for you lovely! Glad all has gone well this cycle so far, keeping everything crossed you're the next name on the Grad's 🤞🏼❤️

skipper and Binky hope you're both ok? Skip your Wedding is so soon!!! Hope everything is falling into place and you're not too stressed

Hugs to anyone I've missed 🤗

Just had a quick glance and need to add more...

pyjamas I'm sorry af showed up again but I'm very excited to hear about your IVF journey. I know it must be daunting but you're a strong woman, you've got this! Wishing you all the luck in the world 🍀

Scandal congrats on your pregnancy, fx for a smooth 9 months this time!

Otters really pleased you were given a trigger shot thus time. Keeping my fx your bloods show healthy O

AFM: I ovulated CD15 this cycle and we HS O-2 night, O-1 am & pm and O day night. I'm 2dpo today. I'm happy we've given it a decent shot but won't be getting carried away. Therapy is going well for dh and we had a really lovely, stress free fw this time thank God. We've also booked an anniversary holiday to Vancouver in October which I'm sooo excited about!!! It's given me something else to focus on.

Also in case anyone's interested our Moose had a baby girl last week called Edith Lily (nn. Edie) 8lb 15oz. She was almost 2 weeks late, induced and ended in an emergency C-sec. Huge congrats Moose if you're reading but I'm sure you're way too busy having sweet newborn snuggles!

Lovely news Alexia about Moose and lovely to see you. Sounds like your timing was spot on, LSFX for a relaxed 2WW for you.

I'm temping/OPKing this month, so assuming I don't get a BFP, I'm going to post my chart at the end of the 2WW and maybe you could cast your expert eye over it?

What an awkward and difficult thing to hear over the phone after such a long and intense conversation as well! Some people really don't seem to grasp the impact of what they are saying/who they are saying it to and how.

Mouse thanks for the boost, much needed. It can be hard not to get bogged down in the sadness of it but I agree it's so important to try!

One thing they do on the PMA thread which might be good when people need a boost is on a Friday, everyone's first post is 3 things they feel happy about/grateful for/looking forward to. Can be a good way to kickstart some positivity. I'll do it this Friday and if anyone else feels the need to boost their mood they can join me!