P to the M to the A! Thread #6, here we go!

[ArchiesMamaBird]

So in the absence of our lovely founder Hippy, I've set up thread #6 to help us keep up the motivation and PMA.

Congratulations to all our grads, the rest of us may be slacking behind but we'll be there soon!

#bellasgirlgangforever

Bella that's a lovely scan pic 😍 I'm desperate to see that little heartbeat. I'm in the worry club and the sleep club as well, I can def relate to all your posts and I'm also having mixed feelings bout the January club. I've had dull cramps on and off since before bfp and I'm still taking pregnancy test to see them getting darker although today's was lighter but my pee was less deep orange (which seems to be one of my symptoms) than when I had my best line. Only been doing the ICs though but kind of want to do a FRER comparison too #slapsself
I'm taking everyday as a day closer to the end goal only I think I might have actually discovered a way to slow down time.

I have had creamy CM defo. I keep thinking I'm bleeding.

I know I'm just being a total worrier I went and spoke to the midwife and she said basically ur uterus was prepared for a period so like 1cm thick of blood etc so that's the cramping feeling plus obviously everything stretching and settling in. Initially I was reassured but honestly it's all I can feel like like crampy feelings like I'm actually going to get my period.

Reallly don't have a good feeling today. Said about a scan at EPU but they said to try to be at least 7 weeks so that there is actually something to see.

It's so crazy because nothing I do will change this I just need to try and be patient and relax it's just not happening 😭 I'm actually getting upset this is crazy lol

Oh Amanda hope you feel more positive soon. I think it's more unusual not to have cramps and I'm also having that leaky feeling that gives me a panic. I'm keep needing to give myself a slap to stop worrying #keepthefaith
I've started a baby quilt I know some people say it's unlucky or a jinx. But that kinda thinking isn't pma! It's helping me having something to focus on (plus this way I have a chance of finishing it on time)

Crossing my fingers for you Sara is anyone else testing soon? I'm curious to know what day I wudve got a bfp (I did do a sneaky test 8dpo but realised that was a bit silly) my bfp on 14dpo on the IC was a squinter my oh didn't see it at all at first

Thanks for the lovely words ladies.

Af still isn't here nearly 5 days on and had 2 bfns! Has anyone had this before? I'm not really sure what to do and it's driving me crazy?!

Hey ladies ...
Well you've probably all noticed that I haven't commented in a while and as I read back through the thread I am a bit sad because many of the members who are still ttc seemed to have dropped off a bit and there are lots of posts from our grads.

Many of you are fully aware of my personal challenging circumstances with ttc ... most notably that my dp is not fully on board which gives me one crack at the whip each month and undeniably gets me down... sadly I hate to say this but I'm not the only one on here that is having a difficult and longer than anticipated ttc journey and I set up this thread with the intention of attracting nice people, who supported each other and welcomed others who were having a difficult time with ttc. We've had some great laughs and amazing banter and you've all been exceptionally supportive for which I would like to say thank you from the bottom of my heart.
Soppy shit aside and getting to the point of my post.... many of you lovely ladies have now graduated and are well on your way to meeting your bundles of joy ... and whilst it's been nice to hear about how your getting on and the stuff your experiencing .... the thread was set up to take each and everyone of us to bfp and provide support to get to that point. It was also supposed to be welcoming and not clickie ... it wasn't supposed to be a 'gang' ... how are new members supposed to feel welcome when we keep hashtagging girlgang?!!
Now that we have oh what is it again x10 grads...? I think this is enough to create a Pma thread to pregnancy on a new board.
Please don't take this the wrong way grads .... I'm hoping that you will understand that whilst your pg journey is well underway some of us are still in that pressure cooker that is ttc and whilst it's lovely to see your scan pics .... it's also heart wrenching when we all want it so badly and some of us ttc'ers have been trying a very long time.
Grads - I hope you understand where I'm coming from and of course I can't make you set up a new thread and leave this one ....
But it's fairly obvious to me that the grad posts are outweighing the ttc posts and im sure that the pressure to join you is already present with the remaining ttc'ers without you guys innocently asking 'who's next to test'.
Please take these comments with kindness and be assured that I have posted this in the interests of others as well as myself

I wish all you grads a lovely smooth pregnancy and of course I genuinely hope to see you and be welcomed on the other side

Xxx

Hi hippy, good to hear from you!
I'd been thinking for a while about starting up a Grads Thread but didn't wanna offend anyone or feel like we were abandoning the thread as soon as we got our BFP. I fully understand your thoughts though as when I was TTC, I LOVED hearing BFP stories and journeys but at the same time, the threads still very much focused on conceiving whereas this one may be going off the beaten track.
So I've taken it upon myself to set up a thread, link below :

www.mumsnet.com/Talk/pregnancy/2935505-PMA-Grads-Thread?msgid=69220340#69220340

Everyone feel free to join and hope to see the rest of you VERY soon! I hope you don't mind if I still follow this thread as I've grown very attached to everyone and would love to keep up to date.

Hi hippy,

I completely understand, have tried to take a step back from the thread as can understand how hard it would be.

Wishing you all the very best of luck on your ttc journey.

I think it's a great idea ladies!!! But grads please do drop in on us every now and again and I'm sure we'll all come along to see your scans etc on the new thread!!! Xxxxx

Well done for speaking up @Hippychic18 and good work on the new thread @Dollydaydream2829. I'm clicking watch so I can drop in and see how you're all doing and find my way there in not too long I hope!! Definitely taking a step back from the stressy side of TTC this month and for the foreseeable. Trying to switch off from it a bit and just reeelllaaaaxx!! But will be here for all those still in the bumpy road to BFP!

@loababy only times I've had that mind fuck were 2 or 3 cycles after I had my implant out. Did my nut in! But af generally showed herself in the end. I hope that BFP is just being elusive though! Xx

That's such a shame you feel that way @hippy I enjoyed both sides of the TTC as it was a mixed bunch and the grads sharing tips on how they got BFP etc.

Anyway I understand & I'll move onto dollydaydreams board!! X

As a very new grad I can honestly say that I loved having the grads on the thread whilst I was still struggling TTC. I found it exciting and inspiring sharing their journeys and it really helped me to keep the faith that one day it would be me #pma
But I don't mind joining a grads thread but I'll be sad not to experience the buzz of sharing those bfps because there's nothing like sharing in someone's else's happiness to give my pma a good kick up the arse

I had also been thinking about setting up a pma grads thread but also didn't want it to seem like I was abandoning the lovely ladies who were there for me during my ttc journey or that i didn't care about your ttc journeys - I'm staying here to see you all get your bfps but I'll join the grad thread and keep the pg talk for there!
Xo

i guess the more grads on a thread, the more the thread will have grad chat. c'est la vie

a lot of those still to grad have been incredibly funny, supportive and have given some great advice during my journey, so to move on is incredibly disappointing as i'd have loved to stay to see it through to everyone graduating.

apologies to anyone who felt pressure from any of my posts, i sincerely hope they haven't negatively affected you during your PMA/TTC journey! i personally enjoyed the BFPs rolling in as it made me feel like it was only a matter of time for me, that is of course over the initial split second tantrum of "when is it my turn"! but i appreciate that some of us bounce back quicker than others.

anyway, i feel as though iv been handed my coat so i'm not 1 to hang around like a bad smell!

good luck ladies, i hope your BFPs are just around the corner xx

Here here @Bella.

I really didn't think discussing my journey after BFP would have affected anyone. So I also apologise to anyone who is affected etc.

I remember having a discussion about baby bombs and how on here it wasn't the same. I'm sure 4/5 people got a BFP through my journey on this page and I haven't ever given it a second thought.

No one should feel like they can't post here or drop in when they feel like it. I think the point of @Hippychic18 post was that the chat recently has been dominated by pregnancy talk-really lovely to hear about but this is a conception board and some may find it difficult to add to the conversation or join the thread when that's the talk they read first and it's something they can't share in. I'm lucky enough to have been pregnant so can offer advice and experience to the first timers but I'm also going a bit bonkers with not being able to get my second BFP as easily as I got my first. It's a fine line!

But I had never TTC before? So does that mean I could have joined in the chat about OPKS etc? TTC comes hand in hand with BFP and BFNs. I feel like it's a pretty cheeky post and basically saying if you've ur BFP then just leave.

I understand it is hard but I think it was maybe a bit over the top especially when @hippy wasn't actually in the thread and said she was taking time out.

Everyone was enjoying each other's chat and asking whose next to test has been asked along the 3/4 threads iv been involved in whether the person has a BFP or not.

So it's a bit rotten to make all the grads feel like we are kinda rubbing the non grads face in it when actually all the grads have been non grads before.

That's the last I'll say on it I don't think iv ever been asked to leave a thread before.

Wish you all the best of luck x

thanks @CakesALot that's appreciated and nice of you to say.

i guess a simple "can we get the chat back on TTC" would have sufficed. hence my "handed my coat" comment. too harsh in my opinion!

i have tried to be sensitive with my posts, took time out when i felt like a negative nancy so as not to bring the PMA down and certainly never hashtagged about a girlgang to exclude anyone.

can't help but feel it's a little hypocritical to mention these things whilst actively excluding people but again, only my opinion.

look forward to y'all joining a BFP thread soon xx

Oh gosh I don't think anyone's been asked to leave !!! 😱 Grads you are more than welcome to stay and hold our hands through this ttc journey, after all you know how it's done!!! I would really like to predominately discuss ttc tho as that's what it's all about here on this thread, hopefully I'll be able to join you all soon tho!!! Xx

It'll be lovely to have 2 pma threads to share the positivity from both sides. I'd like to think if we have pregnancy qs then we can head to the grad thread if people have ttc advice they head to this thread that kinda thing :)

Still no af I just want her back in my life now! Come back Flo I'm sorry for all the mean things I said haha!! But seriously it's giving me horrible health anxiety :(

Happy Monday ladies! I've just popped over the grass thread to say hey to them all too. I think I'm going to sneak over there every few days to see how they're all getting on, because I genuinely feel like we're all friends now. I've shared stuff with you guys that I haven't even told DH of real life friends!!

Anyway 2dpo here and I'm going to try and ignore the 2ww this cycle (yeah right 😬)

Loa sending all the positive vibes that you OV late, implanted late and that your BFP will show within the next few days we are definitely overdue a BFP!!

*grads thread not grass thread 🙈

That was exactly my point @sarahboro1! No one has to go but it does make sense to put the relevant conversations on the right boards!

@loababy is it worth a trip to the docs or is that too drastic?! Your cycles were pretty regular before right? So frustrating for you

Yes @ArchiesMamaBird my note about putting the grade thread on watch wasn't a joke!! I'll be popping by to see how you're all getting on

Ok just to clarify - firstly I apologise if my post was taken the wrong way ... I guess what I meant was - can the grads set up a new thread to talk about pg related stuff and of course when the ttc'ers are strong enough to pop on and see how your getting on we have that option and equally please pop by and post on here ... I wasn't asking you to leave - sorry if that's how it seemed ... what I meant was can we keep this thread to Pma and ttc talk. And yes I dropped off cuz my Pma deserted me and I felt like a hypocrite posting when I felt so shit and I didn't want to drag anyone else down. I've still been lurking and have read every post.
Xxx

dolly thank you for setting up the grads thread ... and I sincerely hope that I and everyone else will be joining you all on there soon.
Please don't get me wrong - I do like to hear the odd update I just felt that this thread got a bit swamped by pg talk and that ttc'ers were not posting because they can't add to it.
Oh I do feel bad now ladies ... the last thing I wanted to do was upset anyone
Again I'm sorry 😐
Xxx