Thread 29 | The one with the BFPs (please)

[Londonjam]

Calling all OPK-ers, Temp-ers, Clomid-ers, Femara-ers, IUI-ers, IVF-ers and anyone else on the TTC #1 Bus.

We've been going a while now so the novelty has worn off and we're slightly battle scarred and bruised in the cervix area. We don't get a lot of baby dust in these here parts, we just keep it legs spread and fingers crossed (LSFX). We love a baby bomb from a prior bus-mate but if we get told to 'just relax and enjoy it' ONE MORE TIME you will get a punch in the face!

Hop on board, post your stats and prepare to be dazzled by the wealth of TTC knowledge we long-timeys have to share...

Key:
HS - have/had sex
GOS - good old shag
ELH - enthusiastic lavatory happenings
LSFX - legs spread, fingers crossed

Hope I'm not too late to join?

About me:

I'm 32, TTC #1 for the last 18 months although number of cycles is probably only about 8 to 10 due to partner's health issues last year. Also want to scream at people who tell me to relax and it'll happen...

AF due 3rd June (or BFP - fingers crossed!).

Anyone else find it hard to find time and energy for enough sex? Every month we say we'll do it more regularly and then we fail when work and life gets in the way. I often know that we've done it at least once or twice around the right time (same day as positive opk this month so hopeful!), but I still know we probably should be doing it more to give ourselves the best chance.

Hi ladies, have been awol due to busy week at work, although just got back from an afternoon of volunteering at a beer festival!
I've caught up with the thread and apologies if there is anyone I've missed as there was a lot to catch up on.

Cautious congratulations to lisa, I really hope this one stays sticky for you.

Hugs to jam, hep and pyjamas for AF, sounds like you are having a wonderful time on your spa break though pyjamas!

Really sorry to hear that AF is looking like she's imminent skipper.

harriet I'm so pleased you have got an answer as scary as it is. Hopefully the treatment plan will be successful.

Welcome katie you've come to a good thread!

CD19 now, I don't think the Clomid has made any difference. I think maybe I'm about to ovulate, almost positive opk this evening as in the pictures. Was hoping I would ovulate a bit sooner. Will have to watch temperatures over next few days.

Also need to actually have a gos, because we have hs a grand total of once this cycle, tried last week and DH couldn't finish and he hasn't shown any interest in wanting to try again and I have been so tired from work I cba either.
Need to get back on the horse tonight so to speak!

Duh, forgot to post up the photos. What do you guys think? Almost there? It's gone a bit more darker since taking the photo.

Looks positive to me pug - I say go for it! Volunteering at a beer festival sounds fun!

Welcome katie

So sorry skipper - you are so right. This is all totally shite.

Has gaelach been around recently? And does anyone know how kwick is?

Hi Pug, looking good I think it'll be fully positive in 1-2 days. Let the GOSs commence!

Harriet bit embarrassed to admit but I creepily stalk kwick sometimes. She's joined slimming world and is losing weight, and is figuring things out with a new clinic abroad. Work is still hectic - though she has a new more relaxed role, I believe she's still interviewing people for her old role so is kind of straddling two jobs. She's going on holiday tomorrow (don't know where). I miss her.

Welcome Katie. Yes after long term ttc we really struggle with the sex thing (mostly dh's fault). It's just such an unrewarding chore now and what with work, life and preferring to just cuddle and watch TV we have to make a right effort to do it.

Update - Dh's bloods came back normal, it's definitely a psychological thing. He had his first therapy session today. He said it went well and he felt comfortable opening up. He didn't get emotional but said the guy wanted to assess him for depression related to his childhood I don't think he's depressed but I'm no professional. I really hope everything is ok because anti depressants affect libido which is certainly not what we need.

Hi Katie yes we definitely struggle with the sex too. As my af ends and we approach fw I can feel the stress building 're making sure we do it at the right time and at least every other day. Am ashamed to say that in the past I've snapped at him when he can't perform which is totally counter productive as who gets frisky whilst they're being shouted at?!
Pug the tests look like they're on the way up - just in time for bank holiday weekend
Alexia good news 're oh blood test results, at least physical issues have been ruled out. Therapy sounds like it's started well too - I wouldn't worry yet 're anti depressants, it's amazing how talking to stranger can help

Glad that his session went well alexia. I understand why you're worried about antidepressants but a) you don't know yet that they'll be necessary and b) depression is also a real libido killer: I know its maybe different for men and women but when I took antidepressants a few years ago I had a higher libido than I had when I was really ill (though still lower than my 'normal').

How are you doing today Lisa?

Alexia good to hear that DH isn't physically ill, that must be a relief to both of you. Re depression, I know many people who have tackled depression without the use of anti depressants so it may be that even if he is depressed, therapy alone will help. There are also different types of anti-depressant, so if he does need them and finds that they have unwanted side effects, there may be alternatives he can try.

How are you feeling Skipper?

Pug that looks very nearly positive to me! Get GOSing. LSFX!

Welcome Katie. Always nice to have new people, but hope you don't have to stay too long!

Welcome Katie

Glad to hear that your DH therapy session went well Alexia - know it's a generalisation but a lot of men would struggle to even agree to delve into that sort of thing. He must be a good one.

I have calmed down significantly after the test results and GP is going to phone me on Monday to discuss them. Amazing how much more positive I feel when the sun is shining! And AF due on Sunday!

So glad your DH's session went well alexia - I used to be on low dose anti-depressants as well, and I found my libido was better as I felt more emotionally balanced. Hopefully he won't need them, but if he does, there are lots of options.

I reckon you'll get a positive today or tomorrow pug!

How are you feeling today skipper? Hope you're ok.

AF has now left the building (very lucky with two day periods) and I really feel like this place has healed me. I did four classes yesterday and had a massage and a facial - I'm glowing! Did a morning work out today, have HIIT in an hour, barre fusion at 12, a stretch and relax session later on and finish off the day with an Indian head massage. It's so nice having time to myself and safe in the knowledge that there are no arguments - who knows, it may do me some good for my next cycle.

pyjamas that all sounds so great! I really want to do it! Is it a package or did you pay for all that stuff separately?

alexia I think it's really positive that the bloods were clear, and hopefully counselling will be a great help. After what happened to him he may well have unresolved things and it could be great for you both if he could deal with them with support.

I'm feeling really fat and bloated. The heat is definitely contributing but hoping AF is on her way (for once) - it's been 32 days since my MVA and this will be my first period since January!

I'm ok, thanks, flash - this morning's FRER wasn't so different to a couple of days ago (I was a bit hoping for one of those ones where the test line is much darker than the control line, but they're about the same), but I think it's still ok news - it's not lighter. My breasts have started hurting more, which makes me feel a little better - I'd kill for some nausea right now! Anyway, I'm trying to keep myself calm, one day at a time. I've got a GP's appointment on Tues, and they should refer me on for an early reassurance scan within a couple of weeks, assuming I don't lose it before then. How are you doing?

Really glad you've had such a good time PJs, and that you're feeling more positive, flora.

Everything is included Harriet (breakfast, lunch and dinner, as many exercise classes as you want, full use of spa facilities etc, treatments like massages are extra) so I'm milking the exercise classes for all their worth! You can make it as active or as relaxed as you like - distraction was key for me - so I've filled my days with stuff to do, although I have relaxed as well! There are far cheaper options, but I got a good rating for my performance for the year at work which means I'll get a bit of a bonus so I thought fuck it, I'm spoiling myself. Worth keeping an eye on their website as they frequently have offers on** (none coincided with my AF date, of course). I can't afford this every month - so I'm going to look into day spas when I'm back in London!

I think that's good Lisa - never thought I'd say this to anyone, but I hope you feel sick soon! Gah, that looks terrible written down, but you know what I mean!

Thanks for all the thoughts yesterday, I was not in a good place. Feeling a bit calmer today, and currently sat staring at my first clomid tablet. I've broken it in half so it'll only be 25mg. Just can't help feeling that its another placebo to keep me hopeful but won't actually achieve anything. Also nervous of side effects. I suffer from rosacea so the hot flushes could really affect my skin badly.

skipper I really hope AF hasn't got you too. If it has you have my full sympathy today. As someone said to me yesterday, day 1 is just the worst. Just get through it xxx

harriet that's great news you have a plan

Welcome katie

Good to see you pug. Are you going to have a blood test or scan to confirm ovulation? HOw are you finding clomid otherwise?

GLad you are feeling better flora and flash you are sounding more positive too, hope you are doing okay

pyjamas I love your proactive approach and so glad that it helped you so much. I am inspired!

Still keeping LSFX for you lisa I can't imagine how nerve wracking this wait must be for you

Right time to take this tablet I reckon...

Thanks for all the lovely replies about DH ❤️ It's interesting to hear how anti depressants have helped some of you. We'll just have to see how it goes but it feels good that he's starting treatment.

pyjamas it honestly sounds heavenly! I need to look into something like this.

Jam if you're worried about side effects it's probably best to take it in the evening so you sleep through it. I think with only 25mg you should be fine. Glad you're feeling a bit calmer today

Lisa I too hope you feel sick soon! That's good news about the sore boobs and test. Keeping fx for you.

Thinking of you skipper

I'm taking this tww easy. I'm not wearing socks in this heat, I ate an ice cream yesterday and drunk cold water / smoothie, I'm not eating pineapple, nuts and whatever else I was doing. I've missed my tablets for 2 days. I feel free!

Thanks so much jam and pjs. It just feels crazy that it's only been a week since I took the first test; this week has felt like a year!

Really good to hear that you're feeling more positive, Alexia. Absolutely on not wearing socks in this heat! Anyway, presumably your feet are keeping themselves warm!

I'm trying (and failing) not to stress too much about symptoms/lack of. My brother's girlfriend is 18 weeks pregnant and she still hasn't felt any different at all, apart from maybe a little tired. She was convinced that her 12 week scan would reveal there was no baby - but there it was, happy and healthy. It's so strange how much it varies: some women have a million symptoms from 8dpo, while she was completely unsuspecting at 8 weeks, as it turned out, until she realised she hadn't had a period in a while...

Jam yes feeling much better. I think the combo of getting AF before my grandad's funeral/DH's birthday then my friend, just put me in a bad place but overall I am feeling good, going to make sure I give FW everything I've got, but also enjoy it.

My weight loss/fitness drive is going well, I've lost a couple of kilos and am feeling really on top of things. I'm looking forward to treating myself to some new clothes.

Glad to hear things are looking cautiously positive for you Lisa. Sore boobs are a good sign!

Thanks, flash. I'm really glad that you're feeling better - and congratulations on the weight loss, glad to hear that hard work is paying off!

I'm glad everyone is feeling more positive today.

Jam good luck for the Clomid. I hope you don't get any of the nasty side effects and, obviously, that it's what you need to bring you your BFP.

Alexia, I'm another one who has been on a low dose of ADs before and had absolutely zero side effects. In fact, it was the best thing I ever did and totally changed my life. I think it's great that DH is seeking help and I'm sure with your support, he'll be able to work through it all.

Pyjamas, my PIL often go to a day spa near Reading which they really like. I think it's called Nirvana spa or something like that. They have a floatation tank which is supposed to be amazing. Congrats on the rating too!

Flash Glad you're feeling better today and huge congrats on the weight loss/fitness.

Lisa, still keeping everything crossed for you and glad that things seem to be progressing. Hurrah for sore boobs.

Welcome Katie!

Hope you're doing okay sk1pper

Sorry to anyone I've missed. Hope everyone has fun plans for the long weekend!

'

Happy Friday ladies!!

PJs - so glad to hear you're feeling good now. That place sounds INCREDIBLE! When are you there till?

Lisa so happy that things are still looking goodish. I've still got everything crossed for you. You're right that it is SO weird how different women have completely different symptoms.

Flash awesome work on the healthy eating. It is SO hard. Big gold star for you! 🌟

Alexia glad to hear you're being a bit more laid back this TWW if doing everything else was causing you stress. It's too hot to be faffing! So sorry to hear about your DH also, it must be really hard for you both.

Jam - good luck with the clomid - hope it doesn't give you hot flashes, especially in this weather!

Harriet - I'm a bloated beach ball over here too so I'm right there with you!

Day 22 over here and I'm now convinced that I have low-grade hypothyroidism (underactive thyroid). Looking at the symptoms, I've never had a high libido but always thought that was just how I'm wired (but low libido is a symptom). I also have a ridiculously bad memory (another symptom) and often get mental fog (another symptom). Plus fatigue (I sleep 8 hours a night then press snooze and sleep a lot more at the weekend) and constipation (TMI!). Oh any my mum was diagnosed with it in her early 40s.

I am worried though that the dr won't treat me because I'm in the "normal" range, but I think this HAS to be what's causing our issues.

Oh and welcome Katie, forgot to say that. We're happy to have you here!

Thanks for the spa tip kath!

Just here until tomorrow Kerry (three nights), check out at 11am so enough time to squeeze in one of their wake up work out sessions 👍🏼 Have you been tested for a potential thyroid issue? Worth getting checked out!

Happy sunny Friday girls xx

Hope you're doing alright skipper xx

Pug - I've read online that Clomid can actually delay ovulation a little bit. I usually ovulate around CD14 and this cycle it was more like CD16, not much I know but thought it was worth mentioning as I was quite surprised when I read it. Your tests look good, shouldn't be long now - have you done one today?

Alexia - Good news about your DH's bloods. Depression doesn't always express itself with sadness and tears remember, sometimes people are just run down inside and put on a good show. I'm sure the therapy will get to the bottom of whatever is troubling him.

Pyjamas - You and your two day periods not at all jealous! Your time away sounds simply sublime, you timed it perfectly - straight into this cycle on a high.

Harriet - Ugh know what you mean re the fat and bloated, I have been enjoying the sunshine but the heat sometimes is a bit much. Fx for AF arriving soon for you!

Lisa - Glad you're still doing well. I know you want some tell-tale sign that you are pregnant, but don't go wishing for nausea just yet...I've heard morning sickness can be absolute hell and you want to avoid that if at all possible. Try and stay calm until your first scan okay?

Jam - 25mg is the perfect amount to begin on, your side effects should be minimal. Honestly, I was really apprehensive as well but it really didn't impact me that much except the nausea post-ovulation...and in a weird way, I enjoyed it because I thought it meant it was working. I know every woman is different but I'm 90% certain you will be okay on such a low dose.

And welcome Katie!

Sorry I posted an absolute bomb-shell and then disappeared. I was in foul mood last night, Alexia I think you get this too...when AF is imminent and you can just feel your hormone levels adjusting. I did mean to appologise this morning but work was horrendously busy and I just haven't had the time. No AF yet but I'm an old hand in this now and she is definitely in the building. I "treated myself" to a mooncup after reading all the recommendations on here and am trying it out before she appears. So far so good to be honest, but I've had to cut the stem right down to the cup. Getting it out will be fun. My OH has annoyed me because he was absolutely horrified by the concept, all he could say was "but that's where my willy goes". Men. Seriously. Sometimes they need to grow the fuck up.