TTC after miscarriage- March 2007

[duchesse]

Sorry, guys, can't leave a redirect at the old one- it's not accepting new messages. I hope nobody's already set a new one up...

I think the usual signs are all a bit mixed up following MC as your hormones return to normal. According to my monitor I was ovulating for about 2 weeks! Not sure about EWCM. If you don't want to wait for your next period and you're uncertain about when you are ovulating maybe you should just aim to do the deed every other day...???

Hey KatyH ? My DH is originally from Newtongrange and his folks are there so we go out there quite a lot We live in West Lothian but I work in Edinburgh

Hey MrsMc!! You're almost a neighbour I too work in Edinburgh and lived there until we moved out here 2 years ago before my dd was born. We looked at quite a few houses in Newtongrange actually. Where in West Lothian are you?

Hi All !
Sorry you're having a crap day Popsy - have a {hug} - not much I know.

KatyH - I keep toying with the idea of a clearblue digital monitor thing - the price puts me off and I'm fairly certain we do actually manage to hit the right times (using combination of OPK & CM to determine this) so not sure... might have a look on ebay.

Thanks everyone for your thoughts on the scan and DH. Good idea MrsMc about a friend although all my friends who could come have their own children and also its an internal scan and I think DH is the only one I'd really feel comfortable having in the room. He mentioned how he would be there himself this morning even though his deal is probably set to complete monday night so at least I don't feel I'm forcing him into it. The one time DH didn't make it to an antenatal hospital appt (I had a few probs in dd's pregnancy) was the one where I ended up being put on monitoring and Dh in the end came back from work to be with me in the middle of a completion so I kind of feel I want him there so things don't go wrong IYSWIM !! As it is I don't think they will tell me anything there and then.

Blood test went fine - dd was fascinated and kept asking what I was doing - quite funny ! I think she was having flashbacks to her jabs because she kept saying she didn't want it. The nurse didn't know what some of the abbreviations were and said they were unusual tests so thats kind of good I think that they are covering lots of things. I almost burst into tears though when the computer flashed up my name and that I was pregnant due 15/3/07. Luckily the nurse must have guessed !

Sunny here today, have to get on and try and get some jobs done for the hoards arriving - the house is a pit and I need to go and collect a li lo from a friend.

Thank crunchie its friday !!

Hello all
I've no experience of using any of the monitore and prediction kits, as I think I would get all obsessive over them, and end up vey stressed out!
Did your dh set off safely mrsmc? Its not pathetic to miss him, just lovely that your in love... Milan does sound fantastic.Hope you have luck finin a holiday for the 2 of you too, maybe by then there will be 3.

Hi ladies, can I join you?

I have been lurking for a while following a missed miscarriage at 11 weeks at the end of Feb. Only back at work this week as had a rough time (1st EPRC was incomplete and had to go back for a 2nd). I thought I was doing ok but today I have really crumbled and am sitting at my desk close to tears (think being tired doesn't help)and my boss (who apparently told the rest of the office to be tactful) asking if I thought the mc was my fault... . Still waiting for AF to return before ttc and the waiting is driving me round the bend.

Sorry for the moan- I had meant to post my first message last night when I was more cheery!

Also wanted to say that reading your posts recently have really helped me- you're all so lovely!(why can't you work in my office!!)

Aww Torres - sorry you're having to join us but come on in, pull up a chair and have a rant and a good cry. Have a {hug}. Your boss sounds somewhat tactless - what a git.

Is your name to do with wine ? I love Torres wine... (why are we all so wine obssessed round here ??)

Hi Girls -

I have been reading this thread for a couple of days and would like to join you too!

I miscarried at 7 weeks on 26th March whilst on a residential school trip - not recommended!! I then had to wait a horrible 6 days before I got back home, I cried myself to sleep every night...

BUT! am feeling much better now and trying hard to think positive. I can empathise so deeply with what everyone has been saying about PG friends -we had my 19 week gone friend round for Easter lunch and it was a bittersweet experience. Ditto the fact that we had put an offer in on a new house with an extra bedroom 2 days before I lost the bean and now DH is saying "sensible" things like - well we don't need extra room now, we could get a lodger to help pay the mortgage

he's a wondrous man but that strikes me as a tad insensitive!!!

oh Basilbrush - sorry you're here too and how awful to be away when 'it' happened. have a hug too.

Know what you mean about a new house. We had been planning to move when we were ttc and when I had my m/c we decided to get on with it as something 'positive' to do. We are having to do some work to our new house but in all our plannings one of the rooms is for DC2 whenever it materialises and I find that quite hard. Just think, you can kick the lodger out WHEN dc arrives !

Thanks wheely bug- your hug made me cry! (in a good way!).

My boss is always tactless so I shouldn't have been too surprised (when i was mugged a few years back he told me it was my fault for not being trained in martial arts!). Hmm.. why do I still work here??

I am wine obsessed too so should fit in nicely. I've not heard of Torres wine though- where's it from? The name is actually from a place in Chile where we stayed on our honeymoon and where I think we conceived

sorry basilbrush- our posts overlapped. really sorry to hear your news- must have ben awful being away from home

yay for kicking out lodgers! fingers crossed it won't be too long....

speaking of bosses, i was with mine on trip and she's very gung-ho with three grown up kids and all i got was " it's a bugger being a woman isn't it? Oh well chin up, happened to me
[ after she's had two kids] and you just have to get on it with it"

other extreme was my mum who was hysterical with worry having had a m/c after me. She got an infection and had to have a hysterectomy. This was in the seventies and is VERY rare, don't want to panic anyone!! but she was obsessed with the idea of history repeating itself and i almost felt guilty for telling her I'd been PG, she was so upset

hi torres - another overlap there too methinks!

mmmm wine....only an hour and half to go. surely it's respectable to have a wee glass of red at 5pm on a Friday???

At 5pm it's more than acceptable, it's expected!

I am trying to fill in the gap until then! I have even tried to bribe our office junior to go to the shops and buy some chocolate (so far without any success)

aha...am eating easter egg as we speak...

Sorry Torres and basilbrush. It's just awful, isn't it. Like everyone says, I just never knew how bad it coud be until it happended to me and I can't seem to think about anything else. On the day of the m/c a man came around to discuss our loft conversion. Decided to do it if I got pregnant so happily made plans when I got my BFP. Forgot to tell him not to come for obvious reasons and the poor man was faced with a hysterical, apologising woman. .
I am having lots of red wine to help me through and to sleep.

hi patkica, it's awful isn't it.

I know what you mean about being hysterical, I seem to get worried looks wherever I go.

I just had to call a client for the first time since I've been back at work. My colleagues have been writing to him whilst I was off and being vague about my absence. His first question was to ask where I'd been. I mumbled something about having an operation and he said 'oh i thought you might have been on maternity leave'. This started me off sobbing and choking and both of us trying to get off the phone.

I am now trying to hold back the tears with a mouthful of maltesers (the office junior finally caved in and went to the shops due to my heightened hysteria

torres - you are having a crap day, poor you. sending a hug from the wilds of the frozen north...
i know how you feel - this morning got my appointment card from the hospital for what would have been my 14 week scan complete with lots of shiney leaflets about birth plans and what to take to the labour ward. had to phone them and tell i wouldn't be coming in

eat malteasers and drink wine as soon as you get home - it's friday!!

Hey Wheely ? totally do understand why you?d like DH there Horrible about the computer flashing that glad the blood tests went well.

Yes, Kensgirl ? he called me from the airport it?s so sweet, he was so excited about going and has requested lamb kofta as his coming home meal on Monday

Torres, welcome I?m so sorry for your loss how awful the experience must have been. I?ve been asked that question a couple of times, I think people with no personal experience of MC just assume that someone is to blame, it?s very hurtful I know. I hope this thread helps you, it has helped me no end I love Torres wine too! Yum! It?s Spanish.

Welcome Basilbrush I?m so sorry who?ve had a horrible time too. I can empathise a little bit, my MC started at a champagne reception in an exquisite library ? timing hey! You?ll be needing that extra room soon enough I hope. How awful for your Mum I also hear what you say about your boss, people have told me their stories with that attitude too, I think they just didn?t let themselves feel.

No wine for me at 5pm as have to drive the olds around would probably fall asleep anyway, knackered!

MrsMcJnr - you sound like such a nice lady, if you don't mind me saying!

Glad your AF arrived lol, that means not long to go till BD time... how long did it take for AF to return if you don't mind me asking? My m/c was nearly three weeks ago and have no idea what to expect...

if no wine, then have yourself a nice hot chocolate before falling asleep

Thank you Basilbrush what a nice thing to say! This is a really friendly thread, I think you?ll like it here. It is a funny irony being pleased about AF arriving (like when you start getting ?ive HPTs after a MC) I had hoped we?d fall before AF arrived but I was being unrealistic, my body just wasn?t ready. If I count from the first day of my MC bled, it was 40 days until my AF re-appeared so just under 6 weeks. The EPU told me that it should re-appear between 6 and 8 weeks so I guess that was on track. I was 9 weeks when the bled started (though I didn?t lose the baby until I few days later I don?t think, all I know is that she was there on 2/3 and gone totally on 9/3) so I guess it takes a while for the HCG levels to fall. Finally got a ?ive HPT a couple of weeks later. My first cycle was really odd, not even sure that I ovulated, we?ll see what this cycle brings!

I got a -ve test five days after MC started but apparently my "blighted ovum" (horrible phrase, much prefer "bean"!!) stopped growing at 4 weeks even though I thought I was 7 weeks. That means that things were over just as I did the PG test and got all excited
but hoping that because things really were no- go from the start, and as my hormones fell quickly and that I will get back on track soon...

Thanks MrsMcJnr and basilbrush.

This thread has been so helpful. I felt in shock and so alone after the mc it helped to read others' thoughts and experiences- you're such a lovely lot. MrsMcJnr- I agree with basilbrush. Your posts over the last few weeks have been so helpful to me, very inspirational

I was going to try and sort out my workload before leaving so monday isn't too awful but I can't be bothered now. I've finished my maltesers and all this talk of wine is distracting.

still basilbrush,I don't have to wait til I get home. Our office is handily situated above a winebar so I just need to waddle downstairs. Just need to stop looking so red and tearful before I venture out in public!

Hi gillydaffodil

sorry I'm so slow typing these posts I missed yours.

Wishing you lots of strength for your colleagues announcement- not a nice thing to hear right now.