Is it a line? Time for some wine? Yep, it's TTC after miscarriage thread number nine.

[BertieBotts]

Hello ladies

Hope you don't mind my little poem...

Fingers crossed for some sticky beans this time.

(Newbies welcome too!)

Sorry ladies! Posted in the wrong thread.

@keeponrunning85 I'm so, so, sorry. I had the same experience - slow development - and it was just agonising. I really feel for you.

@DaisyLou85 I'm really sorry for your loss. My two best friends both announced their pregnancies just before/just after my miscarriage - one due on what would have been my due date, one on my birthday - and it's been pretty tough. We started trying as soon as I got a negative test, before my first period. I hope it works out for you - we're 7 months on and no luck yet, but I know post-MC is more fertile for lots of women.

@conkerchops That's so good to hear about your reflexology! I really hope it works for us - I can tell DH is pinning a lot of hope on it.

Peach is that a certain thread where the op hasn't had her 12 week scan but is asking about the worst parts of being a parent? If it is it upset me so much. Has it gone poof yet?

Daisy so sorry you're here too. I'm not waiting for AF. The only thing that's helping at the moment is knowing we're trying again.

Thank you for your kind words ladies. I think I'm going to be stepping away from mumsnet for a while. Although now isn't the time for making decisions both DH and I feel that we can't try again with nothing being different so we shall be taking a break from TTC whilst looking into getting surgery on my wonky uterus.

I'll be hoping for lots of bfps and sticky beans for you all. And in the nicest possible way, if I do ever come back to this thread I hope none of you will be here!

Wishing you all the very best Running x

Completely understandable keepon. I can't imagine what you've been through. Will be thinking of you and hoping you are able to get the surgery you need and that you eventually get what you want. 💐

Hi daisy. I'm sorry you find yourself here. I've only been around a few weeks, but it is nice to have somewhere where people understand. I can't imagine having to work with pregnant ladies and newborns. Think it would break me. Bad enough having a pregnant colleague!

How are the cakes Anne?

Sending you a huge hug @running - completely understandable - really hope that you can get the surgery you need so that one day you can have your rainbow baby xxxxx
I am feeling in a quandary today as we have quite a few people telling me I should take some time to recover from this last mmc and enjoy the summer - we're moving house and have a holiday in south of France booked - I'm sure more time for healing emotionally would be good but I am 38 and our children are already 7 and 9 so feel time is not on our side and it is not going to change our minds - we so want one more little conkerchops!
But then I have been enjoying so much finally feeling well again after the surgery and infection and being back to my running - should I allow myself a month or two of that before hitting ttc full on?
See I am full of contradictions!!!

Conker Can you compromise? Maybe just not NOT try but also not temp, OPK, chart etc? That's what I do when I'm feeling stressed and it usually does work to give me a calmer month.

Keepon Take care of yourself and if you ever need us, you know where we are xx

It's so hard to know when's the right time Conker. What does your partner think? House moving and holiday sound like positive things, but they're not things you'd have to cancel if you were pregnant. No saying you can't enjoy both. Maybe peach has a good idea of not really actively trying, but not preventing and seeing what happens. I change my mind daily though... so I'm probably not the best person to help!

Totally understandkeepon. I wish you and DH all the very best going forward and I hope if our paths do cross again, it will be on an in the club thread

We'll all be thinking of you @running, take good care of yourself.

Waiting til you feel emotionally robust enough to start the process again vs wanting to be pregnant again and closer to holdung your baby is such a hard battle. I statted trying straight away again this month because that felt rifht for me but my mc was v early and i just so desperately want it to happen as soon as possible. Waiting for AF or possible signs is so difficult though isn't it, esp when you don't know when or even if you've ovulated or when your cycle really started because it wasn't a period, it was a mc. I've told myself it won't happen this month and yet I know I'll be so disappointed if it doesn't, I've just eaten a lot of brownie, watching trash tv and having a little cry. Fingers crossed for all those ttc this month and hugs to all those taking time to heal their bodies and hearts this month xxx

Ctil sometimes having a cry and chocolate is all that's possible. It's so, so hard. And it's ok to not be ok. I'll have my fingers crossed for you this month.

So...AF hasn't shown yet despite a bit of moderate cramping a few nights ago (and that shock of seeing what I took to be mc products the same night). I wanted a glass of wine with dinner but I thought I'd just POAS first to set my mind at ease, and lo and behold, it was a clear BFP! I'm so confused; how is it possible that I'm both passing things (no blood though, tbf) and also pregnant? Am I already in the process of losing it? I don't know what's going on in my body, but I'm just going to take it day by day I guess, like always! So weird; just last night DH declared my boobs looked bigger and I nay-sayed him (I'm pretty small on top so any change is noticeable, and he is the expert!) Anyway, gone are the days when 2 lines meant unreserved joy, but I'm certainly happy and keeping fingers (and everything else) crossed!

Hi all
Wlm great news.
I think I may be out again. Very intense cramps, and some light spotting today. My back is really killing now. 4+4 so I know it could be nothing but a bit freaked out.

Wlm that's great! Will be keeping everything crossed for you.

Miami really hoping it's nothing for you. Understandably freaked out.

Oh wow WLM, that's brilliant news! You must have known on some level to check, how exciting! How many DPO do you think you are?

Hmmm miami, I can understand the worry. Hope cramping and spotting go quickly and don't turn into anything bad. Did you do a digi with weeks indicator? Remember if either carry on you can ask for an HCG test which should show decent levels by now. Might help reassure you. So hope things are going to work out for you x x x

Cake was a roaring success and we've had a fab day! Poor DH had a real moment on the way home My DSD was playing beautifully with a friend's little one and he got really choked up saying she'll make such a lovely big sister and he's desperate for a baby. All I could do was give him a big squeeze and tell him it'll happen for us. Usually his line! But fuck I hope it's true.

I often find myself thinking it's all been easier on him as whatever happens for us, he's still already a dad. But our losses have been just that, both of ours, and he's just as sad about the missing babies as I am.

Glad we can be there for each other.

Thanks anne.
I have a frer for tomorrow morning to compare with mondays one, so we'll see. Will get a cb digi tomorrow if I think it is required. Seems to have settled a bit now. Poor DH i dragged him home from record store day after going to the pub loos for a wee and seeing spotting.

Miami I hope so much that it's all just settling in pains. It's hard to not be freaked out about everything, we all understand that! Fx for you

Anne well done on the cake; there's more work in getting them right than people realise! It's so good that you and your DH are on the same page that way; even if it is a shit time, you're fully in it together. I don't know for sure about DPO as I don't temp or anything, but I'm 4 +2 since last AF started (there was a day of EWCM, but I can't remember what day it was). We'll see how we go for the next few days before I'm ready to believe it's really real!

I think a sleep meditation on youtube is on the cards tonight or I'll not sleep at all...

You are such a complete love WLM, thank you x

4+2 makes it sound like you're pretty pregnant How's DH doing? I love a sleep meditation, excellent plan. A warm bath before bed and/or get DH to give you a nice foot rub? I hope he's treating you like fine china!

My boobs hurt. I wish I'd stuck it in the app last month as they bloody killed for ages before af but not sure from when. I'm absolutely not symptom spotting as it leads to madness. 6dpo.

Fantastic news WLM, so happy for you .

Miami, keeping everything crossed for you. Look after yourself and I wait Hope the cramping doesn't come to anything.

Anne, great work with the cake! Sorry to hear DH was struggling today but it is good to know (in a way you would never wish on anyone) that you are both feeling the same. He sounds absolutely lovely whenever you speak/write about him. I just hope for both of you that your sticky pregnancy is here very soon, you so deserve it.

I'm still in the initial stages of AF. This never used to happen until a few months ago but now I get a few days of light spotting, sometimes it goes away altogether and then the real deal hits. I WILL NOT TEST though as I know it is AF (despite the fact that both of my previous pregnancies involved a bit of light bleeding at the start). Even if i do get AF i feel so much worse if I do POAS, so my mantra is that I will not test ever again until a week after AF due...... Let's see how that works out

Hi ladies,
Catching up again. Even though I don't check in often... I'm beginning to feel so attached to everyone and their stories. So sad for running, keeping things crossed for Miami, and delighted for WLM.
As for me CD 9, pleased that AF was only 8 days this time. Going to crack out the opks next week, hoping for ovulation end of week/ next weekend. Firmly back on the TTC horse

Oh congratulations WLM, so happy for you!! I hope you had a nice stress free night's sleep.
Fingers crossed for you miami, I really hope it's nothing to worry about.
Good work on your cake making anne. You sound like such a brilliant step mum, you and your DH are going to be such amazing parents one day hopefully very soon.
Still no AF for me. As I got a BFN on Friday I still don't think I can be pregnant but the longer AF keeps me waiting the more i'm like 'maybe...'. It's usually bang on time and with spotting beforehand. I guess anything goes post MC. I'll feel very guilty if I am though as I've now got a beautiful dress for September and celebrated with a boozy dinner with the bride last night!

You ladies are wonderful. Thank you so much for all your kindness. Bean seems to be in situ for now, very strong positive on the frer and faint control line so hoping that's a good indication of rising hcg. Will get digi's later today.
Halloumi you know that you aren't out until AF arrives, cycles can get a little screwy for a while after mc. Did you opk?
Anne your DH sounds like an absolute gem. I have my fingers and toes crossed for you guys that you get a healthy pregnancy and baby soon.

So glad it's all looking ok miami. Have you got any scans lined up to look forward to yet? I did try and opk, tested religiously from day 11 - day 18 and got nothing, so I guess I could have ov'd late?? I only noticed a bit of EWCM around day 14 though so i thought I was on track... guess I wasn't really looking for it after that though. I just wish I knew what was going on with my body!

Great news Miami, have everything crossed.

halloumi, getting everything crossed for you too. No need to feel guilty though if you do get your BPF. One of my best friends got a BPN before a weekend and then on the Sunday woke up to find a BFP. She was so drunk she didn't even remember taking the test . She felt so guilty and was asking her obs/gyn doctor if she should consider terminating in case she had damaged the baby I don't think she would have been was just so consumed by guilt. She was told at that stage there was absolutely no way it would make a difference as the cells are so small. Different if out was then a regular occurrence going forward but hopefully gives you a bit of reassurance .