Is it a line? Time for some wine? Yep, it's TTC after miscarriage thread number nine.

[BertieBotts]

Hello ladies

Hope you don't mind my little poem...

Fingers crossed for some sticky beans this time.

(Newbies welcome too!)

Miami & Tiffin were you on October 2017 like me?

Thank you for the advice. I think we're going to just go for it again straightaway too.

Miami it's hard not to rant. 4 weeks after we told our parents about the pregnancy, BIL & SIL announced theirs. I only wish them the best but I can't see them right now. Me & my OH were talking yesterday & hoping against hope they don't use 'our' names. One is a very special family name to DH so it's not beyond possibility his brother would want to use it too. The thought horrifies me.

Oh Miami

Nothing at all to stop you from naming a son the same name, even if she does use it, and she might not. But these things hurt SO fucking much, rant away.

One of the people I loathe most in the world had a baby this week. It wasn't wanted and I think they only went ahead as she had an abortion the year before. None of my feelings about it are at all logical but I viscerally hate her and I cannot believe she got another fucking baby (she has dc already) when I'd settle for one. Stupid bloody name she's gone for as well. Eurgh.

yellow, I was also told to test after 2 weeks, it will make sure there's no retained tissue (which following a d&c you win't have anyway) and you'll know everything's back to normal and af (or bfp) could be on their way. I got first af post mmc 28 days after surgery. I cba waiting 2 weeks and think I got a bfn about a week after surgery, but see how you go.

I wouldn't dtd while you're still bleeding as you might be uncomfy and your cervix will be open so you're at more risk of infection. But as long as you're comfy and feeling alright just go with whatever feels right.

Keep on your folic/vitamins etc if you're going to keep trying straight away, even if you're not actually, may as well keep your strength up!

Oh miami that's so gutting, fingers crossed they don't use it. One of our NCT group used one of our top pick names for their DD just before ours was born. I was so annoyed at the time, we considered using it anyway but decided against it.

I can't imagine my DD being called that now and I absolutely love the name we picked. Hopefully they'll not use it, but even if they do, you'll find something else that is just a special I'm sure.

yellowfrontdoor yes I was on the October thread too. I nc from anotherminime after the mc as the name made me sad.

@yellowfrontdoor I was on July 2017, ended up getting some tests done so have only jumped back into this since last cycle.

Evening Ladies, I have just logged back on in what feels like weeks, glad you are all still on the same thread so i can catch up.

Hope everyone is doing well (as well as can be)

I have FINALLY come on my period after my ERPC on the 6th Feb.10 weeks AF made me bloody wait! Ive had so many scans/blood tests/drs appts I didnt know if i was coming or going. Final straw for me was when the Dr said, 'just stop worrying and your period will return' errr ok?! Like its that bloody easy. Anyway to cut a long story short i went for pranic healing and then voila I came on today....not sure if it was the lady unblocking my chakras or not but its worked. She also claimed she can help with fertility so I'm going to give it a go....keeping an open mind!

I can't wait to get back to TTC this month!

Oh miami - hugs for you xx I definitely think it's ok to use names friends have used, they will just be big mike/little mike growing up.

I hope you get a big strong line tomorrow morning.

I haven't texted yet - gonna try tomorrow morning I think

Oh my god AmyL that's a long wait!!! I swear the reiki thing worked for me the one time I had it (back in university at this free de-stress event before final exams). I suddenly felt this tingling and then my intense sinus cold cleared away as if it had never been! So while I'm normally a bit sceptic, I'm a believer in that case. Hope it works for the fertility side
yellow I'm sorry for your loss. Don't feel guilty about needing time to get back to yourself before ttc again. I used the month after mc (well, it was 6 weeks before AF showed actually) to recover myself and to reconnect a bit with my husband, so we could be a couple healing rather than a couple ttc. That whole "you're most fertile after a MC" thing is misleading in that a) it's not true for everyone and b) in cases where it is true, the benefits last for on average 3 months. This is according to research on the Miscarriage Association website, so don't put pressure on yourself or feel guilty if you're not up to ttc straight away! For some people it's part of the healing; for me I had to heal first. and hugs for you as you go through this shitty time. Xa

yellow sorry for your loss.

I waited one cycle as I didn't want to be worried that i hadnt waited long enough. Plenty of people don't though

Interesting about the pranic healing AmyL. I just started back at yoga this month and I swear it is the most normal my body has felt since mc.

Yellow I'm so sorry to see you here. It's really shit. Be kind to yourself.

So it's a faint BFP on a frer for me this morning ladies. Absolutely shitting myself and all feels very surreal at the minute. I am gonna hang out with you guys for a bit if that's ok?

Unicorn *

Miami* squeezing your hand right now. I think if I get a positive again I'll be terrified too.

But congratulations still! x

Miami! Congratulations! I can't yet imagine how that must feel, and I really hope you are able to find some excitement mixed in with all the other emotions.

Why do people think it's ok to ask you when you're going to have kids. I watch one couple, who got married a year before me, get asked. They went quiet, a few seconds passed then mumbled something and moved the subject on. I felt awful for them. Later in the night said husband asked me!!! Urgh. Laughed it off, but just wanted to cry, or hit him. All the while I had to watch my wonderful husband playing with our friends two little kids and it broke my heart that it's not us.

Sorry, just needed a bit of a rant.

I'm so sorry about all the name drama happening elsewhere. It's so hard. :( Sending love to you all over Easter. Hope you have nice plans.

Also tested this morning, hoping for a bfn (so weird) so I can feel like this might be over. It's more positive than I ever got when I was actually testing to see if I was pregnant. I'll wait till Monday to do another, which will be two weeks since surgery. If it's still positive then, should I ring the EPU? I wasn't told to take a test, just let them know if I was still bleeding after two weeks. I hate this so much.

Thanks @DancingUnicorn just been for a walk/jog to try and get my head out of it for a while.
I know it is a complete headmelt. For my first mc I was still testing positive after around 14 days and then suddenly I got a massive headache and I knew that it was all gone, tested next morning and it was stark white.
Give yourself a chance, your body is working super super hard to sort this all out for you. I would leave it until after the long weekend and see where you are then.

Thanks Miami. It's reassuring to know it might just disappear overnight. Hopefully after the weekend things will be better! Luckily I'm busy doing lots of nice things all weekend, so should go a bit quicker.

miami god that's brilliant news! So very happy for you, big congratulations.

DH must be over the moon too. Hang out as long as you like! Sending you a gentle squeeze. Mind yourself now, as you say x x x

Thanks @AnneLovesGilbert I think I will try and get an counselling session in for next week. Won't do any harm. I am thinking I am gonna do my own tlc approach. I think I can get one scan at the epu and if that goes well we might pay for another, hopefully to get us to 12 week mark. I am also going to do some reflexology and keep up my acupuncture. All of which will hopefully help, but mainly should help my head as well (to feel like I am doing something).
It's so early though, feel like even getting to Tuesday which will be 4 wk mark is going to take an age. My cycles are short 26 days and no matter how often i tell them they just take the standard 28day cycle length for dates. I suppose i could fib and take 2 days off my lmp.......

How are you @AnneLovesGilbert ?

Congratulations miami so so super happy for you xxxx

I've been doing the bbt charting (well sort of) for the first time this month. On CD 22 I had a temp of 37.77 but by CD 23 it was 36.33 - agh does this mean I have a short luteal phase now?? Cycle was 28 days last month and 29/30 pre miscarriage.

Slept in today so didn't take it - doh!

@MulderitsmeX
What cd are you now? Is it cd23 for you today? So potentially 8/9dpo? Could be an implantation dip if that is the case, however many things can affect temps, bad sleep, room temp, travel all kinds of things really. Temping is frustrating as is it not an exact science, but I do find it a relief each month when I get a clear ovulation, at least I knew that bit was happening.

Hi dancingunicorn.. I haven't been on here in a bit and haven't read all posts by wanted to let you know my experience.. I also wasn't told to test but did after 3 and a half weeks and was surprised to get positive., I did phone epu who took me in for a scan and some bloods but it showed really low hcg levels and she thought probably from previous mc. And 4 weeks to the day from erpc af arrived but I was still testing positive until 3 weeks 5 days after erpc. I never knew it could take that long. I'm sorry your going through this!!

Congrats Miami fingers crossed for you!!!