40+ ttc: bring on the bfp's!

[ababsurdum]

Continuation of the long-running 40+ ttc thread.

Link to the previous thread.

Thanks. It was the physical side of it really that's hit me the most. And having to start all over again.

It was our third cycle so not too bad. But ds is 4 so I feel the gap is widening which is a shame. However the gap is so wide now, any bigger doesn't make much difference!

Hello, wonder if I could join for some support and ideas...

I'm 40.5 and have 2DC -DS1 was about 2 years in the making arriving when I was 35. Took another 2.5 years to conceive DS2, who arrived when I was 38. Been trying since his arrival to sneak in a third but nada.

I have very irregular cycles, with irregular ovulation, short luteal phase and a tendency toward chemical pregnancies so I know I am so very very lucky to have 2 DC already. Absolutely no chance I'd try any kind of medical approach now, though was referred twice in the past, just before the conception of each DC (almost wanting another referral to see if that will happen again).

Just want to have a good go at trying for one more before it really is too late...although with a recent shortening of my cycle after years of the opposite I am wondering if I'm actually peri-menopausal.

Hi asper. I'm also 40 and a bit. I gathered from various sources that the book "it starts with the egg" is helpful for older mothers. The other one is taking charge of your fertility (I've not read it). Certainly it starts with has suggestions for various supplements and lifestyle changes that increase chances of successful pregnancy (it was written by a doctor). With regards to the peri, I'm not sure. I could have a look though.

Agnus castus often gets mentioned but I don't know much about it. I know of someone who's periods hadn't returned post bf who took it to conceive.

Asper, have you had any tests to see if it is peri? My cycles got shorter in my early 30s but I conceived straight away. My cycles are pretty much the same length now but I've been ttc for a year. Are you tracking ovulation?

There are things you can take to lengthen LP - i think it's B6 but you could take a B-complex to cover them all. And Angus Castus which is also good for irregular cycles.

Sorry to hear about your mc Ek. Hope you conceive again quickly.

I second having hormone tests Asper. I saw an endocrinologist which was massively helpful but also had my AMH tested privately (around £85) which confirmed that I was still ovulating & had decent egg quantity. The results of that and chatting with the consultant are what pushed me to actually go ahead with ttc on my own. I was told that essentially if I wanted to use my own eggs I had a solid 6 months to get going or I would find it very difficult. (I've just turned 42).

Thank you all.

Ekphrasis Taking Charge of your Fertility is the book that made my 2 DC. Got the recommendation on these boards somewhere. Religiously charting my cycle made me better at identifying my rare ovulations and seize the moment! It also made me aware of the chemical pregnancies I seem to be prone to -had temperature rises before "delayed" periods when I knew I had ovulated. So I seem to be ok at conceiving when I do ovulate but implantation not great.

Alibaba2 and PheonixMama I haven't had blood tests to confirm but I got down to 20 days on and off and haven't seen any evidence of ovulation for a while. Haven't breast fed for 1.5 years. Maybe I should...feel like my GP must be sick of me, especially now I actually have 2, like "isnt she satisfied yet?" How do you get AMH done privately?

My DH would be happy to stop at 2 -he really feels how lucky we've been and doesn't want to try too hard IYSWIM although he says he'd also like 3 if it can happen without too much trouble. He found it tough when we had early losses or when we realised we were actually conceiving fairly regularly.

Thanks ali.

Ah ok asp, well the only other things that seem to be mentioned around and about are the supplements you can take (ubiquinol, folate and a few others) and possibly trying baby asprin from bfp. I was told to take it as my ds had iugr but some women seem to be told to try it to avoid early mc. The egg book sets out the case for the father taking vitamins too as well as cutting back on caffeine and alcohol.

I just googled AMH private Asper - not sure where you are but I used a great clinic in Wimbledon if you want recs!

Phoenix, what did the endocrinologist say? Did they run any tests? If you don't mind, could you pm me your AMH as I had mine done and I've no idea if it's decent.

If you've got decent egg quality why do they think this will change in 6 months?

Sorry for all the questions!

Hi Ali - the Endocrinologist ran about 50 different tests - every hormone/body chemistry I think I have - FSH, thyroid, Estrogens (both of them), Progesterone, Vit D, Iron, I mean every thing. I did mine privately (I have insurance through work) but was referred by my GP.

With regard to AMH it totally depends on your age so mine was 8.9 which is totally midling for being 42.

This chart is really helpful: www.simply-fertility.com/patient-info/fertility-assessment/a-guide-to-amh/

That's interesting. If you're based near London, could you PM their details? I fell pg so easily a year ago but nothing since. I keep thinking it must be something wrong but probably it's just my age. OH thinks dtd every other day would have cracked it but I don't think so.

Thanks for the info.

Hi all, I'm new here but thought I'd share my story. I'm 44, my fiance is 43 and we're currently TTC our 2nd child. We have an almost 4 year old daughter and we've been trying since she turned 1 to conceive. We were successful back in April 2015 but unfortunately this ended in a miscarriage at 8 weeks. Since then, nothing. It's now getting to the point where I'm beginning to give up hope and thinking that my eggs are past their use by date!

This month is another month where I'm thinking I have positive signs. I'm cd25 and for the past few days, I've had the most sensitive teeth ever. I've never had this before and its annoying to say the least! Its so bad, that even thinking about my teeth makes my mouth water and I get a coppery taste in my mouth, almost like blood. I've been doing that whole "google everything", but I've no idea if this is a good sign or not, but its new, so of course, I'm hanging onto that! Does anyone know if this is a sign or not, or am I grasping at straws and a trip to the dentist should be one of my immediate plans?!

I've been using the Ovia app and also the Clearblue dual hormone ovulation kits. I have a 28 day regular cycle which I can set a watch to and according to the ovulation kits, I'm ovulating right on cue. We DTD the night before I got my peak smiley static face and a couple of nights after.

I've been to my GP as its been 3 years of trying, but they won't do anything due to my age and also because I've had a successful pregnancy and also fell pregnant again after. They've tested my reserves and apparently, I'm not premenopausal. AF is due on Saturday so I'm going to try and hold off testing until then.

Sorry for the long post, I'm curious as to whether anyone else had had the tooth thing before and it be a sign of early pregnancy or not!

Keria hate to say it but I've never heard of the teeth thing before!

Have you had your AMH done? Would it be worth having some investigating done privately?

I am so glad I found this thread. I started one yesterday about TTC at 40, but didn't see this one.

We've been ttc for 8 months, but not yet had any joy. I know my GP won't really do a lot because of my age, but somebody mentioned a simple blood test you can have done which will reveal level of fertility? Did I hear or misunderstand incorrectly?

Good luck to us all :-)

Shortcake You can have your AMH levels tested which will tell you about the QUANTITY of eggs you have left. Its a blood test and I think mine cost about £85. You get a number & then a range based on your age. For me its what kicked me into gear doing fertility treatment! I figure it's not the whole picture but its more info than I had before!

I didn't know Dr's wouldn't do tests after 40 - thats shocking!

Welcome Keria and Shortcake - good luck to you both!

Sorry for tmi but does this sound like a normal AF:

Fri: spotting am then light flow in the evening
Sat: heavy flow
Sun: heavy flow am then light flow pm
Mon: light flow
Tues: light flow
Weds: spotting

Ali That's pretty much my af - sometimes I would have med flow on your Mon but not always...

Thanks Phoenix. It seemed to end rather suddenly. Normally I get 2 days of heavy and 2 days of light.

Shortcake, I think GP tests depend on the GP. I had a few blood tests and a scan. I think it would be worth you speaking to yours.

PhoenixMama, I did have some blood tests done about a year ago, I'm not sure they were the ones you talk of. I'll call the doctors tomorrow and find out what exactly they did test for. All they told me was that there was no obvious reason why I couldnt conceive.

I still have my annoying teeth thing today. I'm thinking I need to go to the dentists tbh lol

Shortcake, from what I've read about IVF and assisted fertility, the cut off is 42? I'd seek a second opinion if you're doctor is saying he won't assist at 40. My GP sent me off for blood tests etc earlier this year. I now they won't give me IVF or anything, and I don't expect them to, but they were quite happy to carry out some tests.

Shortcake & Keria - NHS won't fund IVF for women after different ages depending on where you live. But you can still get treatment privately. And a lot of the tests you need to get can be done on the NHS too.

Ah, I see, I didnt know it was like a postcode lottery type thing. I'll suggest looking into private treatment with the OH, but might get an AMH test done first, make sure I've actually got eggs there!

Hi all, it's great to see the thread more active and welcome Keira and Shortcake ;-).

Your pattern sounds normal to me Ali.

Can anyone help me w charting? I was expecting my temp to go up today as all my other signs (cm, cp) indicate I ovulated Weds or Thurs. seems odd if temp doesn't rise til sat. Does anyone know?

Thank you...

Hi Clara!

What is CP?

I know when I ov as I feel it. I normally release the egg on cd11, the app records it as cd12 then temp would usually rise cd13.

So Sat sounds correct to me...

Hi Ali,

My AF is usually like that; after I stopped bf it was really heavy. The af I've had post mc was more like my old normal one. I hope it remains!