40+ ttc: bring on the bfp's!

[ababsurdum]

Continuation of the long-running 40+ ttc thread.

Link to the previous thread.

hi ladies. wondering if i can join.

im 45. been ttc since last oct, having had a medical termination in june for abnormalities.

no luck so far but did a clear blue opk and got static smiley on cd15. dtd cd 13 14 15 16 17 18 and some days twice! i am PRAYING for a chance.

thinking of asking re clomid if nothing this cycle but my gp is dismissive - the tfmr really knocked me for six. i get the feeling im judged when i see the gp. dunno.
anyway im 5 dpo i think. i dont test early. im trying not to symptom spot although ive got cramps and raging thrush probably from dtd so enthusiastically over the fertile window!

Quick update... ultrasound showed cysts are smaller. AFC really poor (2), but estrogen normalizing and this is definitely feeling like a 'real' period. So they want to start me on BCPs today and get testing done to begin IVF ASAP, next cycle I presume. Ugh decision time.

Welcome myusername. More the merrier as far as I'm concerned.

I feel like a fool deciding to try IVF with odds so incredibly low (

Welcome user and good luck! Does your GP surgery have other docs you can try who cd ge more empathetic?

Till, I don't know all the acronyms but I don't think you're crazy to try with low odds. I may do one max 2 cycles in similar circs and if not conclude it wasn't meant to be.

Hiya, hope its ok to join in? I'm 40 and been ttc 2 months, but since starting, my periods have all gone wrong. Took pregnacare conception for the first month then ended up 3 weeks late. Researched it and apparently those vitamns can do that(??!) Finally it arrived and now cd8 and still going strong. Also had some spotting a week before it arrived. Really concerned it may be age related wind down, always been regular 28 day cycle before this! Has anyone else experienced anything like this?

thaanks for the welcome.
till just properly read your story - thats tough going and im so sorry. i feel a little that something may be going on with me too - im 45. got pg within 2 months of trying last year but my weeny girl was very poorly with a chromosomal abnormality and we decided not to continue. very hard decision and i wonder now if im being punished because of it - ive not managed to conceive again and been trying almost a year.
it feels bleak. dp is i think depressed - he had made his peace with not having children with his ex wife who had fertility issues and then i came along and got pg so easily all for it to be taken away again. it feel especially cruel. i do have grown up children from my previous relationship. but i so long to be pg again and hold a baby in my arms.
i have an appt on tuesday with gp to discuss clomid - ill probably have to go private and i wouldnt be opting for any ivf route - thats a step too far for me financially i think.
i am still having 30 day cycles and used a clear blue opk this month which did show a surge in lh - i got a static smiley on cd15 so im hopeful that i am at least still ovulating though i cant work out if i am why im still not pg a year later.
i dont feel 45. i know i could do this again. its so bloody hard - its all i want.

Hi ladies may i join you? I'm 45 and like myusername says i don't feel it. Myusername: I'm so sorry about your little girl. I wish you lots of luck and baby dust. It just becomes everything doesn't it?
It's so bloody hard.. as Cleozeta says at this age you feel like your body is winding down. Our story is we're trying for dc2 ..dc1 is 3 and a half and is adamant he doesn't want a sibling!! DH def does!.. But after 2 years of trying nothing is happening. ..admittedly we haven't been trying that much..just once or twice a month ..but lately i have been trying opks and pregnacare vits my friend gave me and been getting faint lines but nothing 100% pos. I have raging symptoms of ovulation that drive me crazy! I had my little boy at 41 and didn't even realise i was preg for 3 months!! Thought i was going into peri menopause as i had late bleeds what i thought were weird periods..not quite bleeds. The other day i heard a story of a lady who was 49 and didn't realise she was preg until she had only a couple of months left!! She thought she had a stomach problem!!. So it's possible. Hold on in there everyone .. and baby dust to you all xx

Thanks everyone for the input. It is hard, all of it. Of course all I really want is for it to be five years ago and trying for our third then... would have been fine then I'm sure! DH really doesn't want to try IVF, we've been pretty distraught emotionally recently and he thinks the hormones might be too much. I'm not willing to have that stop us, but he is my voice of reason and absolutely incredible, and I have to at least try to understand that perspective..

till you have my sympathies. its a hard decision.

im another cycle down. im cd 24 but im pretty sure its not happened this cycle. not wasting a test. i just know. ill wait for af. i was quite hopeful when i got the static smiley on the opk but of course that doesnt mean youll get pg does it!
suspect im not. i can just tell. so im 45 +5 now. time for a reality check maybe. im just sad for dp.

im wondering if its time to call it a day. im sick of the nervous anitciation each month when increasingly its getting ever less likely.
im a bit annoyed because dp met me at 42. he asked straight away if i thought i could have a baby but wouldnt then commit. i could wash my hands of the responsibility really. but now the idea is sown its hard to let go.

I'm so sorry myusername. It's too hard sometimes. You have all my sympathies. Everyone on this site does! It's just torture...

Hello
Can I join too, I am 45 in 3 months, I have 1 little boy 4. All of a sudden a few months back it hit me that I wanted to give him a sibling and I wanted another baby. Since he was born people asked are you having another but I always replied that I was getting on a bit etc etc basically because I think I was just scared. Now I am so annoyed with myself that I have wasted 2 years I am so upset and angry with myself, it is quite consuming.

Hi everyone, hope it's ok to jump in?

I'm 45 and already have a 17 year old. Previous to this I had 2 miscarriages was dx with endo which was then treated. It came back just under a year after my eldest born, I've had more treatment and since the prostap around 6 years ago it's settled right down.

I have a very regular cycle and based on cervical mucus I think I am still ovulating.

New partner doesn't have children of his own and would like and I would love another (I would have had another with ex but relationship broke down and I've basically been single since).

Am I being completely unrealistic?

I've always fallen pregnant very easily with all 3 pregnancies and the mc were considered likely to be due to the endo.

But I know my age makes a big difference.

I'm also on antidepressants which I'd need to discuss with dr I guess (which I'm dreading as don't think dr will approve).

Only just starting to think about this but know time is not on my side.

hi wannabe its quite nice to see some others my age trying!

ive just been to gp. well - nurse - 3 days ago i developed raging thrush and now ive got the biggest lump imaginable - its painful!

im on antibiotics and she took swabs so god knows what fresh hell this is.

i asked re clomid and she was lovely - told me to go and see a gynea at a private hospital her friend went to.

ive just rung up - its £185 for the initial consult and i need a gp referral so im going back to see gp tomorrow.
all i want is clomid - i dont think dp would want to go down the whole ivf route again.
that said he is being moody and hard to talk to at the moment.

my boobs are just starting to feel a little tender so at cd 25 im guessing af is going to be right on cue at around cd30.
bugger.

I wish clomid worked for me. I would love to feel as if I was 'doing something' by at least taking clomid, without having to go full IVF. hopefully you can get your clomid.

At 41.5, I feel ancient, but I know that I can't afford to waste ANY more time. I should just jump on IVF today but since DH doesn't want to it's so hard!!

Is there somewhere I can learn the abbreviations you guys are using. I'm so out of the loop of this kind of thing.

Is clomid for boosting egg release?

Literally just starting to think about all this so don't know where to start.

What about natural fertility boosts?

Can I ask what kind of reaction you guys have had from gp's/practice nurses? My practice nurse is lovely gp not so much.

I don't know all of the abbreviations, but I have learned that DH is 'dear husband', IVF is In Vitro.

Jilly, i am also 45 and had DS at 41. I feel exactly the same in that i have wasted the last couple of years ..but like you i am scared! 45 feels too old and having a nearly 4 year old is exhausting and i'm always saying i could never cope with another one!! But something keeps pushing me to want it and although we hardly ever dtd i have recently started opk's. I think i'm still ovulating but just don't know exactly when as the tests don't seem to work that well. Also we def don't try hard enough as i'm just always too tired!! So i know exactly how you are feeling xx

I'd like to join too, although we aren't trying quite yet...
I'm 41 and have a 7 and 4 year old. I was pregnant with my 3rd until last week when I had a medical miscarriage due to the baby passing away at 14 weeks (suspected chromosomal problem).
Just want to add that the doctors have been nothing but supportive in me trying for another and said not to fixate on my age too much!
So in a month or so I will be ttc again.....

Hi booseysmom

It is nice to have someone to relate to on this. All you other ladies too. I think for me I was happy with my one child for the first few years as I never thought I would be lucky enough to have him, not medically but circumstances. So I felt very blessed and sort of didn't want to chance my luck with trying for another, he was a great baby and he is a wonderful little boy now. Plus at 42 I thought I was too old and people like work colleagues etc would judge me, god how I long to turn back time and be 42 again! I am just unsure wether to try or not, are the risks too high? Time is against me now. X

Hello all!

Sorry I fell off the thread. I had a chemical about 6 weeks ago and it hit me badly. Then I've been just trying to get in with life including a very drunk night out which I'm hoping is not a Terrible Thing I'll try to catch up soon. I do think if you all. Welcome to new people!

Wanna - get 'it starts with the egg' - good advice for what can help esp older mothers.

Wease I'm so so sorry for your loss.

Ekphrasis, I think we were both on the January 18 thread.....

I don't think so wease - I do recognise your name though? I was due Nov 15th this year. I had a different user name then though.

The Nov date was my first mc. (Confusing!)