Ttc after miscarriage thread #8

[Miami81]

Hey. Just starting new thread. Hope the rest of you find it.

If it is age related the egg quality stuff might still be useful Water.

For those of us who don't have any children yet, just a history of losing multiple pregnancies, any theory will do if it means we're more likely to get our baby in the end.

Water & anne
I am 35 so figured there was no harm trying to improve egg quality.
I think AF is coming today, which means a 23 day cycle. I am gutted. Last one was 27 and felt that it was a good sign that I was managing to improve egg quality as that should have an impact on cycle length.
Disheartened now.
Feel like potentially one ovary is performing badly (23 day cycle) and the other is better. But no way to guarantee which one eggs come from..........

Anne Unfortunately we didn't get the house, outbid quite substantially by someone willing to pay way over the asking price. And AF arrived in all her glory last night so yesterday was a pretty bad day all round. Feeling a little bit hopeless today, if I'm honest!

emsler Oh love, so sorry

That happened to us loads last year when we were looking, a complete shock as the areas we looked in weren't meant to be that up and coming! A lot of buy to let stuff going on though. I'm so sorry, it's really disappointing.

Have you got others to view? Where we've ended up wasn't somewhere we'd ever planned to look but the house is perfect. It was one of those funny things, after a shed load of hassle and knock backs it finally fell into place. I'm sure your meant-to-be house is just around the corner. And AF coming sucks.

Can you plan a nice evening to have something to look forward to? Or something fun at the weekend when AF will be better or gone? Lovely glass of wine and a nice takeaway tonight, a good film, cuddles on the sofa in your PJs.

Well done Crazy! for you.

I find the best thing for me is to not buyet a test unless I have a good reason to do one ie AF being late. Last year I found myself going through a phase of doing them after AF with the desperate hope I was one of those women who still had periods when they were pregnant. Not good!

So sorry about AF and the house emsler. My sister is always very philosophical about house buying and always says if it is meant to be your house you will get it. I think there's some truth in that.

Just out of interest Miami, where do you get your Ubiquinol from and how much are you taking?

It is a rainy day here on Mull. DH and I managed to get a run in before the rain and the plan for the rest of the day is lounge by the stove and go out for cake this afternoon.

Anne You are so lovely, thank you

Anne what's a non fussy uterus? And i think trying anything to help a pregnancy along is definitely worth it whatever gives you more hope is worth it. Trying to stay positive is hard and I'm only on number 1 mc. Also anne i don't think hot baths do anything to eggs but can to a fetus no one ever told me that with my first pregnancy and i love hot baths
Crazy well done for resisting.

Bertie that does sound good. Fx
I have now got it in my head that my placenta is the problem as had a short one with my dd. Why do i torment myself why can't I just accept it wasn't meant to be. Why do i have to find something about my stupid body to blame.

OMG I totally think I have an unfussy uterus. Both times I've fallen pregnant first time trying, both early losses.

How do you improve egg quality? I've just turned 30 so while obviously not young I hadn't started to worry about my eggs yet :(

Anne you sound so positive can i have some and also you sound like you'd make a fab mum. I'm a bit old but you can be mine haha.

Emsler have a fab time and have a few for me.

I was reading this, but I've heard it pop up a bunch of times and sure there's more out there. Add links to anything you think is worth reading.

www.newscientist.com/article/mg20627574-500-miscarriage-blamed-on-non-fussy-uterus/

Who knows, could be nothing in it. But I've conceived 3 times in 6 months, which is surprising. The one they tested was chromosomal normal, not sure what that does to the argument...

What's your thinking on the placenta fluffiny? Would it cause a miscarriage? If it is an issue is there anything they can do? And thank you, that's very sweet. I've got my hands full of step kids but always room for more God, I really want one of my own.

Not sure I am that positive tbh. I was asking DH last night if he could imagine the future without more children and who I'm going to be if I can't be a Mum. There's lot of great stuff in my life that I'm hugely thankful for, but it's never crossed my mind till the last few months that maybe it's not going to happen. He said he's keeping the faith, it's early days and then he jumped me. May as well enjoy the few vices I have left!

However, I think everyone feels a bit optimistic in the fertile week, and maybe this time I'll get pregnant and bloody well STAY pregnant.

Have a lovely holiday emsler

harriet see what Miami was saying upthread, she mentioned a book I know a lot of people have found useful. She's your egg expert. I had a quick browse of www.zitawest.com as well. She's the don, isn't she.

emily86 Sorry, I missed your message earlier! I think you're right, "what's for you won't go buy you" as they say. A friend just told me that she cried for a week after losing out on a house - two months later it was completely flooded! Can you imagine?!

fluffiny31 I will raise a glass to you all in the hopes of lots and lots of sticky baby dust!

AnneLovesGilbert For me, discussing what my life would look like if we couldn't have children WAS very helpful and comforting. I've always wanted to be an interior designer and if we don't manage to have one by X age (not sure when that is yet, mind you!) I'll give up my job and retrain (unless we decide to adopt). It's not the same, but it helps me to have a plan B.

You're very inspiring emsler and that sounds like a good plan. I'm sure you will have your baby and you can still be an interior designer! But it must be comforting to have talked it through and have multiple visions of the future.

Whether or not we have one that's both of ours DH already has his so there are children in my future whatever happens. Which is a bit complicated. Can't imagine a life of swanky holidays or moving anywhere far away, taking a career break and studying, anything very exciting at all

You've reminded me of friends who had a seller pull out leaving them in a right mess only to learn that 6 months later it disappeared down a massive sink hole.

I'm freaking out this evening as I've been spotting. Wtf? Think I ovulated yesterday so what the hell? Never had this before

Anne
Spotting at ovulation turned up as a lovely new symptom for me in the cycle after second mc. Put me well on edge as it felt like I had just finished knicker watch from the actual mc.

Anne I get that every month, it's ovulation bleeding, Google it, it's very common... FX for u :)

Emily
Ubiquinol I get mine from Amazon. 200mg.
It is horrendously expensive in holland & Barrett.

Bugger, really? You hadn't had it before but think it's here to stay miami? As you say, more sodding bleeding. Who'd be a woman...

Thank you both for answering. DH has been googling but found bad stuff and we've been panicking!

I've been ovulating since I was 11. Why has it changed?!

Anne
Sorry should have been clearer, it was just during that one post mc cycle. No sign of it since.
It was reddish brown streaks in cm, sorry if that is tmi.

I had the same thing you describe my first cycle post mmc but today was neither new red blood nor old brown blood. More like dull red blood but not very much.

I'll keep an eye and thank you for sharing. Never tmi on here I hope

Btw, I love your "mind yourself". Always makes me smile. It's very caring.

Oh no, Anne, I wasn't trying to be insensitive and I'm so sorry if it came across that way. I was thinking that the "unfussy uterus" theory was just another way for us to beat ourselves up. If, instead, it's a helpful explanation (and the New Scientist intro made a lot of sense) and doesn't just cause guilt -- good.

I'm torn between being positive and thinking it's going to happen and being depressive and thinking it won't so I may as well continue quaffing tea and wine... I'm not a great drinker anyway but it's more than teetotal.

(I had to activate the Freedom app on my phone earlier to stop me festering on MN all day long so I'd better not undo it all now with a long waffle!)

Not sure how I feel tonight.
Was going to dtd when dp stopped and said had better get something.Think the look on my face spoke volumes.And he ended up saying he doesn't want me heartbroken again which while a really lovely sentiment I really need to be pregnant again.
Not sure where that leaves us at the moment,don't really want to have a serious convo about it today,has been a horribly stressful week and can afford to let it lie till the weekend.
Fingers crossed for all of you testing and having tests.
And hopefully I might have a reason to test soon.

I think i just got my first ever ovulation bleeding today too! This is weird - do you think we're all going to end up ovulating and get our AFs at the same time, as if we were flatmates. Then we could all get or BFPs together . Can you tell I'm channeling positive thoughts today

noroom, sorry you're having a tough time. Sounds like you need to set aside some quality time this weekend for you and DP

noroom something similar happened with my dp too for exactly those reasons, I dont think they understand there is an actual "need" to be pregnant. I had a good chat to mine the day after explaining that even if it ended in heartbreak again That would be ok as at least we had tried and it gave him a better explanation of where my head was at, at the time. I hope you can do something similar.

hi swimchick I think I had my 1st ov bleed at the weekend, I kept on wiping in disbelief but i'm pretty sure that's what it was (after much googling). Im trying desperately not to symptom spot - but my boobs are starting to get heavy, Im now full of cold when yesterday I was fine, and for the past few days ive been awake by 4.30 - 5am - allsigns I had with ds.

Fx for you Buddha!

noroom I agree with the chat idea, and being very honest. Might be worth mentioning to DP that life is full of things that break our heartswe can't avoid the eventual passing of our loved ones, for examplebut trying for a baby is one of those times where there is at least a chance of an amazing thing happening. And I'm guessing you wouldn't have got paired up with DP himself if you hadn't been willing to take a risk that your heart would be broken, so there's an example! good luck x

Fingers crossed Buddha!

That'd be hilarious if everyone's cycles aligned swimchick!

I'm starting to massively symptom spot. Think I'm about 7 or 8 DPO based on CM. (I've never gone in for OPKS.) Yesterday eveninf I had the teeniest bit of pink CM on wiping only. I had this before my 2nd BFP and brown CM before the 3rd. However, had also DTD the couple of hours before yesterday. I also seem to have developed a rather short fuse. Desperately trying to not get my hopes up.