10+ months TTC

[Kookie88]

I've just reached cycle 10 and I'm despairing. I've tried to stay focused and positive all this time but it's all gotten a bit much. Each month I've tried something new but nothing seems to be working. (This month is acupuncture month, last month was fertilitea month)!

I guess I just needed to vent I don't want to sound like a total debbie downer but today's been tough!

The next available appointment for SA on NHS near us is 4 months away!!! Oh my god that wait time is so crazy! Going to do it privately, but seriously feel it's so unfair on so many people that have to wait that long Going for blood test results now xxx

Bloods: Progesterone was 19 at CD21 but based on when I ovulated according to OPKs which was CD19, that was only two days after ov. Being a novice I hadn't realised progesterone peaks at 7 days post ovulation. So next month if I haven't had my bfp, I know how to time testing better. Incidentally that's just where progesterone should be post ov so I'm thinking all appears in working order so far. All other results good. Hubby good too apart from some minor unrelated to fertility thing.

So now trying to book in semen analysis private and see how that looks!

Hope all are well xxx

Hi cola,
Glad your results came back ok. That must be a bit of a relief for you. That's bad about the SA test though isn't it. Our doctor did say it might take a while and we might have to go privately but we got an appointment within 2 weeks luckily. 4 months is far too long!! We're still waiting for the results mind you but hopefully should have them this week.

Got one more week of the 2ww to go. I kind of just want to get it over and done with now as keep thinking wouldn't it make our xmas amazing if AF didn't come this month but hey ho, lots to look forward to and lots of xmas shopping/organising to do so best crack on with that! xx

Ugh, when you type a post and accidentally lose it all!!

I'm 10dpo and trying to hold firm on not testing and flat out ignoring any symptomspotting, tonight it's wrapping and cards so lots of distraction! Trying not to think how wonderful baby news would be cos I don't want more intense disappointment - focused instead on how wonderful a few glasses of champagne will be on Christmas Day & I can live with it if I'm disappointed on that front

chloe hope you're finding good distraction tactics!!

faith how are you? We were on similar cycles last month so hope alls well and no witch xxx

Really sending positive thoughts to you all ladies and hoping for more BFPs to end 2016 with a bang! Xxx

Good luck cola.have everything crossed for you hun. Will definitely be watching the space for your bfp. It would be the perfect Christmas present for you after wrapping all those gifts for others.

Cd16 here. About 5dpo so xmas is my bfp.
Baby dust to all the ladies 🌹

Hi all, CD15 here and still waiting for a static smiley, have had 8 days of flashing ones so not sure if I'll get a static one this cycle...anyone else used the CB opks and had lots of flashing smileys before a static?

Good work on the SMEP Chloe, I was hoping to try that this cycle and we were doing ok but DH wasn't in the mood last night, so I suppose it was good I didn't get a static smiley yet!

Hope the tww is managing to pass quickly with all the Christmas festivities and preparations!

Cola have you still managed to hold out from testing? Keeping everything crossed for you.

Hope you caught the egg mimi!!

mrs - the two lines on my opk feels like such a win, good luck with the static soon ☺️ I didn't ov til cd19 this time and felt like forever!

Im 11dpo and managed to not test yesterday though temptation was strong. I wrapped everything My apps tell me AF is due tomorrow. I have drinks Tuesday so I'm thinking Monday night / Tuesday morning to test if no AF. It's hard to resist but I know how much more crap it is when I test and have a bfn hanging over me!

Chloe how are you faring? xxx

Well done on resisting the temptation cola it's so hard, I always end up caving and then being depressed at a bfn.

I ov'd on cd18 last cycle so suppose it will be similar this cycle, the waiting feels like forever, worse than the tww!

Have you all had tests done through your GP or privately? I had some done through my GP, (thyroid, 21 day progesterone) and then saw a consultant privately as 21 day was only 12 but got the impression I was wasting his time so thinking of following up in the new year but not sure whether to see my GP again or find a different consultant privately?
Any advice?

Fx for some BFPs to see in the new year!

I've had my tests through my GP, I think the day 21 bloods is too early to check progesterone if ovulating Later than day 14 as the ideal time to test for progesterone is supposedly 7 days after ov. My progesterone was low on my day 21s but when I told him when I ov'Ed (cd19) he said it would have been wrong timing for the progesterone peak so we should track ov again next cycle and arrange bloods 7 days after. Sounds like we were a bit similar! I'd tell your GP when you think you ov'Ed and try do the bloods 7 days after to see what that returns. If you do a google image search on "progesterone level" you'll see images that show progesterone going up and peaking 7 days after ov, my GP (nhs) did that and it really helped explain it to me! Xxx

Sorry to hear consultant was an ass

We are going private with Semen analysis cos wait time is ridiculous (April!!)

Now to just keep myself from testing....two loads of laundry already done this morning as distraction!!!

Cola and MrsY, my day 21 level was 1.2 at first but GP said do day 21, 23 and 25 bloods next cycle - day 21 was 12 but day 25 was 40-something so I just ov'd later than day 14. Definitely ask to have them repeated. Good luck.

Thanks snooz & cola. It seems so difficult to get the timing right. I had them done at 7 dpo but period started 3 days later so consultant said I'd mistimed it, will see if I can get my GP to repeat the test and do it on day 5 as that is half way through my LP as it only seems to be 10/11 days which I think is part of my problem as I've got pregnant twice this year but don't seem to be able to stay pregnant.

Hope your keeping busy cola!

A good friend invited us to boozy lunch today so I decided I would test. 12dpo, apps tell me test today as AF due so used an early pregnancy test - BFN. A bit disappointed, but not so bad. a lot less so than if I tested Friday or so and doubted the result. Im a convert to holding off longer on testing finally. I'm sure this is accurate, I feel pre period stuff like a big spot coming etc. I think I might be finally developing some patience after all this waiting! A merry Christmas for us it is so.

How are the rest of the ladies in waiting

Glad you're not feeling too disappointed Cola. I was a convert up until this month but I caved and it made me feel crappy. I've been feeling really sick and rubbish so can't help getting my hopes up but DH and my family have all been feeling ill so more than likely that I've just caught what they've got. We'll see this week!

I was feeling ok about everything but then went for dinner last night with 2 of my close friends, one whose PG with 2nd and she told our other friend last night. Our friend then asked me if I was as well so I had to say no which was embarrassing and then she said so what's been happening with you hun. I just felt like I didn't have anything to say? And then she was asking about what I planned to do about working and when I was going to get a job again and obviously what can I say, I'm hoping I'll get PG that's why I don't really want to think about that? Eurgh.. it just made me feel shitty and I had a bit of a cry this morning when I told DH. It's such a horrible waiting game isn't it.

Sorry to be a bit negative, I hate being like that, it's just very much all around at the moment and putting on a brave face all the time gets a little bit exhausting xx

Look at least here chloe we can all be honest about how we are feeling, never feel bad about how you feel or like you have to only share the positive. This waiting pushes us all & the ups and downs are shite! I think the cruelest irony is when we find out it's a bfn, PMS is making us feel even more emotional. I've been narky as hell today and snapped at hubby. Glad I have boozy lunch to look forward to!!

I've been considering this morning do I book semen analysis this week and if so and anything is negative from it, would make hubby feel bit crappy over Christmas. But think it's best to just know. Argh!!

Cola I'd just do it. Just got our SA results and wasn't expecting a problem but there is, so wish I'd done it 9 months ago!
He has to abstain for a few days before so may as well get it booked as might be tricky around Xmas.

Btw how unfair is it that we have to have all sorts done to us for fertility testing whereas men literally have to orgasm...

Hope you made the most of your boozy lunch cola! Glad your not feeling too disappointed.

Sorry your feeling down Chloe, other people's pregnancies and being asked if your pregnant, when you want to be so much but it just isn't working, are so hard to deal with. I've actually started being quite honest with people and saying I've had two mc's this year which tends to stop them in their tracks. I really wish people spoke more openly about their difficulties as it seems that more people than we initially realise haven't had an easy process. There are times that you can't do that though and putting that brace face on is exhausting. Big hugs.

My sister lives abroad and has come back for Christmas so are having a welcome home party for her today, so making the most of the wine and bubbles!

Thanks ladies. We went out for lunch with some friends today and had a really nice afternoon and I had a couple of glasses of bubbly which cheered me up :) how was the boozy lunch cola and how was your party Mrs? I bet it was nice to see your sis. I don't blame you for being upfront with people. I think people who haven't been through it just don't understand do they so they come out with things that are very insensitive and don't realise the hurt it causes unfortunately.

Cherries- did you get your tests done through doctor? My dh gets his on the phone apparently on Tuesday, they said he doesn't need to go in so hopefully it's nothing bad but he's convinced himself it is. I hope it's nothing too serious for your dh? Have they discussed what are next steps?

Hope all the other ladies are ok xx

Blackcherrie* thanks for that, gonna press on with it this week. I think you're right & im overthinking it a bit- Best just to know.

Sooz I meant to say thanks for the steer on the bloods, appreciated xx

Boozy lunch was great, really good food and fun. Feel so much better and more relaxed. Time with friends is so essential to ease the tension and stress that unwittingly builds up.

Glad to hear you're feeling better chloe and that your sis is home mrs. The best bits of Christmas is family & friends reunited (mostly)

chlo - did it all privately, GP wouldn't do so much as a blood test. They sent a report but obv to discuss next steps we need to book another consultation which is £££... pales in significance to cost of ICSI though if we end up doing that...

It's pretty serious I think. I keep thinking it can't be that bad as conceived easily before but that could've been a fluke.

Oh my goodness, spent an hour today trying to book private semen analysis and was just so hard to find somewhere near enough to home. Eventually a lovely lady at one hospital recommended a way to get the GP to NHS refer to them and they have apts in January so worked out in end but not without a lot of trying!!

Still no AF here yet. I feel all symptoms but not strong enough cramps yet so this is going to be another long cycle. My cycles are so variable in length. Last six cycles were 28-27-25-35-30-32 & counting! I would say I was getting much shorter cycles when stressed and since I had my holiday and changed my diet they've been in 30s. The month it was 25 was highest stress month I had all year at work. The one that followed I'd had a holiday and was 35 days. Does anyone else notice that too with your cycles?

Evening all,
That's good Cola that you managed to get it via the NHS after all, and not too long a wait. I know we all wish it would just happen and we didn't have to worry about appointments and tests and all that malarkey but I have found that doing all of that and thereby taking a bit of control over it has helped me feel like I'm not just sitting around doing nothing about it.

DH sat by the phone waiting for his results today as Dr's said they'd call him between 1-1.30pm but they never called him so he rang up and they said oh yeah sorry the doctor's busy, she'll call you on Thursday sometime! Oh well... hopefully we'll know by the end of this week. I'm hoping it's nothing too major if they aren't actually calling him in for an appointment but we'll have to see.

Cherries - yes the costs of the consultations aren't cheap are they. I did all of my stuff privately and when I had the consulations, I was only I there 10 mins tops and it was £200-£250 a pop!

I'm currently day 28 so AF could rear her ugly head any day. I've caved this month and have been testing. Have been feeling really nauseous and light headed but my family have all had same symptoms from a bug that's been going around so keep reminding myself of that not to get my hopes up. Was feeling a bit mental about everything but had a one on one yoga session tonight without DH as he's out and it was sooo good. We did loads of work on my hips and I could really feel my whole lower stomach and she said yeah these movements are all for that area and it will really loosen you up and don't be surprised if you get emotional in the next couple of days. Thought that was pretty interesting. Yoga is definitely one of the positives that has come out of this whole TTC journey for me.

Is anyone else doing yoga? Or tried anything else that they've actually really enjoyed as well? x

I got AF last night. No cramps or pain at all really this cycle so that was nice but caught me out a bit.

Aw chloe I hate that last few days of cycle so much. It's so hard not to test and impossible not to symptom spot & I feel up and down and all over the place. When AF comes it's a relief in some senses not to be in that limbo. I hope you get your bfp but if not, hope AF shows up sooner than later so it isn't dragged out xx

Exercise, diet & hypnotherapy for me. Some great silver linings in a shitty wait! Keen to add acupuncture or yoga next.

Thanks Col xx The last few days are so shitty aren't they, you just want it to arrive on time so it's not dragged out as you say. You just get to the point where you think oh come on then, bloody turn up if you're going to! Sorry to hear she turned up for you.

How do you find the hypnotherapy? The yoga is so relaxing and never fails to make me feel good xx

I love the hypnotherapy because I can do it on the train. It's so hard to find time for stuff so that works so well. It's been great for slowing my thoughts down and really relaxing. It's a like the guided mindfulness meditations on headspace which I like too. They are very calming and energising. I feel very clear headed and level after them.

I love how the yoga targets certain areas and frees them up - sounds like it's been great. Thank goodness we are getting some positives Isn't it fascinating that our bodies have all this emotion locked up in them? To free that up must feel so liberating and leave you feeling lighter. Is there much of a time commitment to the yoga, do you find you need to do much outside the classes or does it work nicely to Just focus on it in the lesson? And Was it hard to find a good teacher?

Xxx