TTC after miscarriage thread #6

[jodiebee664]

New thread for all navigating the bewildering world of trying to conceive after a miscarriage. Whether you have dc or are ttc your first, all are welcome here. We share the positive, the negative and the down right confusing.

Here's link to previous thread...www.mumsnet.com/Talk/conception/2657346-TTC-after-miscarriage-thread-5?noti=1#62460035

It's so interesting to hear about the COQ10 I've never heard about it before but am definitely going to look into it, willing to try anything that might help!

Flash glad you like the acupuncture, as jbee says it's a bit like a therapy session as well as being really relaxing, I think it's the only time I ever lay and think of and do nothing! I find my acupuncturist so easy to open up to, I think it's because she isn't emotionally involved like my mum or DH and gives me practical advice.

Sorry to hear AF showed Brenna

Spotting now, looks like I'm out again for this month.

Sorry AF has turned up Brenna and Little.

I'm due today or tomorrow. Still got a bit of backache and boobs are feeling heavy/sensitive today.

FRERs are still faint positive but haven't darkened since Tue. Feeling a bit lost but resigned to see if I get to Sun/Mon and will take it from there. I have no more sticks to pee on and an ill/very tired DD trying to get comfortable on me while we watch Desperate Me for the 10th time this week! so any plans to get more have been scuppered

I'm seeing a friend and her new baby tomorrow. We were going to be on maternity leave together. I'm so happy for her (they tried for 10yrs!) but not sure how I will feel tomorrow for myself.

Bummer Little

I take DHEA for the first half of the month and CoQ10 all month - ubiquinol which is the most active form and pregnacare before conception all month too.

I hope tomorrow isn't too hard SayIt. Last monday was the 1 year anniversary of losing Rown (our first) and on Tuesday I ended up sat next to an acquaintance and her baby at a dinner. Her baby is 2 weeks younger than Rowan should have been. I wasn't even expecting to see them and it floored me. I survived the evening, then cried until 4.30 the next morning.

Oh Brenna that sounds tough, it's so hard isn't it. One of my friends who was in another country was over a couple of weeks ago and she seemed a bit off that I hadn't told her about my 2nd mc in June (she found out through another friend thinking she knew) - I said it was 2 days before you gave birth and I didn't want to say it in then nor in the midst of you sending me baby pics! I ddin't want her to feel bad but I just wanted to let her know my reason for not saying anything - plus it's not something i want to send over text anyway!

Sorry to all those who've been got by the witch. Friday g&t/wine/drink of choice is in order.

Brenna that sounds really hard.

sayit I hopenjoyed seeing your friend is ok. Remember it is alright if you find it tough.

jbee don't feel bad. I didn't tell my 20 something week pregnant friend about my second MC for a while because I felt like we were getting back on track after a rocky patch. I felt guilty after she did find out but it didn't achieve anything and just made me feel worse. If she's a true friend she'll understand. And if she doesn't, that's her problem.

I'm in the dreaded TWW. Off on holiday tomorrow so hoping that distracts me from thinking about it rather than the constant thinking about it spoiling half my holiday. You know when people say "oh just go on holiday and relax and I'm sure it'll happen" - do you think that works when you're already past ovulation and in the TWW?! (Obvs am joking as it is all bullshit anyway!)

Sorry to all those having visits from the witch; one Halloween character we'd rather not see, eh?

I had some very good news yesterday to do with another condition i have and basically thought I'd have to get an operation which would delay my TTC launch date - turns out I don't need the operation after all so this has brought my TTC date forward to....today!

Since my miscarriage I've "felt" my ovulations since. Good news yesterday + ovulation pains today + DP working from home today = I'm now praying the witch stays away from me in November.

This may sound perverse but I'm glad to be actively trying now at almost the same time as finding this thread. Your stories give me hope but also a reality check and I am glad to have stumbled across such a supportive bunch. X

That is great new Legend. Best of luck - fingers crossed this is your month.

Good news Legend. Wishing you lots of luck!

I did a clearblue digital this morning. Not pregnant. The FRERs must have been picking up leftover hCG from the CP. I can't face going to the Drs again to see if it was another one. And thus I have learnt that early testing is shite, really need to not do that again.

No period yet. Think my cycle is also still off after MC. On to cycle 3 we go. I really hoped I would get pregnant again quickly like I keep hearing so many do.

I keep torturing myself reading the threads on people asking for squinters to be checked. Even snuck a look at the pregnancy after miscarriage thread and wished to be on it .

Hi everyone. I'm knew here and thought I'd pop in and say hello.

I'm currently TTC baby #1 after 5 consecutive miscarriages in 2 years. I've got my first consultant appointment in a few weeks so will hopefully get some answers. Me and my partner are only early 20's with good medical history so are devastated that this keeps happening to us.

Every day just seems to get harder and harder. My last MC was in august, I've had 2 good cycles since so hoping this is our month. It's currently my fertile period but DP always finds it stressful when under pressure so we don't DTD as much as I'd like too .

Sorry to hear the digi was negative say...hope you are doing ok, it's so tough ttc after a mc as you just want to be pregnant again

That sounds really tough Brenna hope you are ok, it sounds like you've had a hard week. We are seeing friends today and one of them is 8 month pregnant, we had our firsts 6 weeks apart and were hoping our seconds would be close too, I'm so happy for her as she's had her own troubles conceiving with a number of miscarriages both times but I'm just sad that I'm not pregnant.

Welcome Bumble sorry to hear of your losses sounds like you have been through a lot over the past two years. I hope the consultant finds some answers for you.

In the dreaded tww too but at least that means I can have my bloods done to check my 21 day prog levels and clotting etc the GP agreed to do for me so going for those on Monday when I'll be 7dpo so at least that is something positive in the tww!

Oh bumble that sounds so hard
Very difficult brenna, so difficult, there's another mum at school that's due basically on my what would be due date just praying I'm pregnant before march or it's going to be hard seeing a baby every day for years that would be the same age as mine.
I just got a call from the hospital for another scan on Monday, I still had retained product on my last scan 3 weeks ago, hoping it will all be gone and I can get on with ttc, it's been 6.5 weeks since my mc and it's literally all I think about and just want to be able to ttc

Just bumped into a girl at work who had her first a couple of months after me and just proudly announced she is expecting her 2nd, had to go and have a little cry before going back to my desk. I should have been able to say me too but I couldn't...It just feels so unfair sometimes.

Hope everyone is doing ok today

Hi Bumble, sorry for your losses and that you're here.

MrsY that is pretty shit. I can understand why it upset you.

Very different but I keep seeing things pop up on MN with women accidentally getting pregnant and feel a bit sad. Or those posting pics to ask 'is there a line?' And it's such a BFP is should come with its own trumpet sound to announce it . I would never wish this on anyone but can't help feeling jealous of those carefree pregnancies.

I bit the bullet yesterday and contacted a counsellor. I am hoping it helps. Not sure whether to try the acupuncture aswell, but I am notoriously impatient and have form for throwing myself at trying to fix things. I'm attempting to temper my need to try so hard because I think it's just making me tougher on myself...

How's everyone else getting on? We have a week off next week so going to centre parcs, I know it's a bit of a marmite place but we really like it .

Sayitisntso1- gosh, I wish I was at centre parks. I love it there. So relaxing, nice food. Have a nice time.
I know what you mean about carefree accidental pregnancies. I'm currently avoiding one person in my social group who "accidentally" got pregnant when on the pill & had food poisoning. She doth protest too much if you know what I mean. Anyway, she kept asking me "when are you going to have a baby then?" I then had to painfully explain that we had been trying but it wasn't going so well.
However, since I last saw her I've been pregnant and miscarried. I just can't face her pregnant smugness. She's very insensitive without meaning to be. I just wish she'd f^#k off!!!!

Have a lovely time at centre parcs say. Will be so good to chill out and have some family time for you.

Well done for contacting a counsellor, I really think talking to someone who isn't emotionally involved with how you are feeling helps so much, I hope you find it helpful. I'm similar in throwing myself at things to fix them, hence the acupuncture, blood tests etc. I think ttc is so difficult as it's so out of your control and that is something I'm not really used to in so many other aspects of my life.

Thingy some people really need to learn to think before they open their mouths don't they. You never know what is going on in someone else's life particularly when it comes to ttcing.

Legend I feel my ovulation too since my MC, never have before although I wonder if that's because I pay more attention to everything obsessively since MC?

Been following the intermediate plan from It Starts With The Egg this cycle, I'm on CD 18 now and ovulated yesterday. It's too soon for the plan to really make a difference and this may just be coincidence but I haven't had any spotting mid-cycle so far this cycle. Taking multi-vits with an additional Folic Acid & Co-Q10. Halved the dose suggested by the book though as everything I ate was passing through me very rapidly!

None of this really matters though as my current barrier to becoming pregnant is psychological, I just can't bring myself to dtd with DP. Feeling so out of control of my own body and it is this time last year that I got pregnant and although it's ridiculous, I can't shake the feeling that if I got pregnant this cycle I'd be setting myself up to repeat the whole thing again and start 2017 with a loss just like how I started 2016 that way. Thinking of taking a break. Talked to DP this morning about using condoms for a while so I can take a psychological break. He's not keen as he really wants us to have a child but he fully supports my choice

Sorry that ended up being so long!
Hope everybody is OK. Sorry to see AF got some of you and so sorry to hear of your losses Bumble

thing is so hard isn't it, after my mc everyone kept telling me how slim I was looking like it was a good thing (I'd been trying to hide my 11 week bump for sometime!) hard when people don't know but when they do know it's mean.
Looks like I'm out of the ttc game for a bit, went for a scan yesterday 6.5 weeks post mc to see if the "retained product" had gone but this sonographer doesn't think it's retained product and thinks it's a polyp, so needs investigating and probably removal :-(
Looks like a while til I'll have the ok to ttc :-(

Hi everybody

Sorry to see some more people have joined. But nice to meet you

So I'm back from my holiday, which was lovely. Can't beat family holidays, can you.

I'm due af on Friday, if my cycle is settling back to a 28 day. I got impatient today, and bought a FR test. I did it earlier, and it was negative I have no idea how it could be, we dtd every day (give or take the odd day) whilst away, which looked to be my fertile time. Now I'm taking the whole 'you're super fertile post mc' with a pinch of salt... Because I'm obviously not. I binned the test, then fished it out of the bin again 30 mins later, just in case a line magically appeared. Ridiculous isn't it.

I'm also back to work now. Surrounded by pregnancy and people joking about it. They have no idea, so I can't blame them. Work are being supportive though, and I'm working reduced hours.

I keep finding myself thinking 'why me?' 'Why my baby' and I'm driving myself mad.

Im trying to think the negative test as a positive, at least when ag arrives this week I won't be devastated.

I'm going to keep up here and try and get my head round all these DPO and CD abbreviations that I have no idea what they are 😳

Hello everyone,

This is my first time posting on the conception boards. I have two beautiful children and was pregnant again but miscarried at 16 weeks in the last week or so. At the moment I'm waiting for the bleeding to stop as would like to try again as soon as possible. I just have this strong urge to be pregnant again.

Have any of you done this or know people who have? Obviously I haven't a clue when my fertile period is as everything is out of whack, should I just wait a couple of days after the bleeding stops and dtd every couple of days for 1-2 weeks?

Hi light green glass,
I'm so sorry for your loss. By bleeding...do you mean that you are currently miscarrying? Or is this your first af after mc? Did you have a D&C?

Josie01 - I have fished many BFN tests out of the bin hoping for a miracle. Glad I'm not the only one. Just started my post mc diet. I put 2kg on in 2 weeks during as I pretty much ate a cake and takeaway a day.
I am going to wait until my BMI is less than 30 before ttc again. Hopefully that'll be January as on slimming world BMI is currently 32.
Jaffa- I'm trying to avoid all pregnant women ATM. It's doing my bloody head in. I'm teach in a hospital and it seems like everyone and their dog are knocked up. Had to get my colleague to cover my session tomorrow as the group are 12 midwives and it's still a little too raw!

Jaffa- I had a friend who had a mc and was found to have a polyp. She has them treated and then got pregnant after 3 mc and an ectopic!

thing I'm lucky it's been spotted on my first mc, i think, if I'd followed the original advice of wait 2 weeks then if you get a negative of test you are free to ttc then I'd probably have had another mc. As it happens I got an infection and thrush and a uti and had additional scans, that was my 6th scan yesterday, until then they have been saying retained product, so it's a bit of a relief that I sort of know what probably caused the mc and can hopefully fix it, though I know the wait on the surgery is 12 weeks.
Does anyone mind if I stick about here? I know I'm not actively ttc as I can't til I've had the polyp removed but my desire is to ttc asap!

Hi light green grass, I'm really sorry for your loss.

Thingy, I've put on a bit of weight too.. Same as you, 'treating' myself to cakes and sweet things.

I really hope we start getting some BFPs soon. Looks like it's not my month.