Aged 35 or over TTC #2?

[RememberToSmile1980]

Hi ladies
I'm trying to conceive no. 2. My aim was to ttc from January of this year - however due to one thing or another (very stressful time at work!) I have not been giving it my all. I have now decided I need to focus on ttc no.2 as I am very conscious of the growing age gap! Please join for a friendly chat and to hopefully support each other!

Stats
Age - 35
Ttc - #2
CD - 21
DS - 3 years 10months!

Don't want to obsess about it! However I think it's inevitable!

Just a question to you all. I have read in a couple of articles that if you are 36 and over and have been trying for 6 months then you should go and see the doctor. This will be my 6 month. Normally 6 months is not an issue as it is no time at all, but reading this advice makes you think. Has anyone been to the doctors or considering it?

Rara - September will be my sixth month of ttcing and if I'm not pregnant by then I'll be booking an appointment with doctors to discuss further, as I'm 36 and suffer from pcos.

I went rara - because My cycles were so off.

They were pretty useless I have to say. Did my day 3/21 tests - my progesterone levels were low but they said that might be because my cycle ended up being long that time (I had flown long distance and that always adds a week to my cycle)

Even tho they didn't accept the results as accurate and Medicate for low progesterone they refused to test again to get accurate picture. And basically told me that there was nothing they could do anyway as I had a child. They showed no interest in exploring why my cycles had gone haywire - other than saying I was old (37). That's why I tried the private route (NHS don't do Amh test to check reserve anyway but I wasn't getting any help from GP)

I'm going back again next cycle to fight. I'm pushing for referral to gynae.

I'm sure yours won't be as useless as mine rara. And it's good to check your hormones are on track (your partner will also have to have a sperm analysis). But if you think you are ovulating and it's just taking a bit of time id hold off for a bit. it had the potential to just add stress.

Blimey Jess - just looked up HELLP. Sounds very scary. Hope you recovered well!

Thanks for the advice, it's crazy how different people's experiences are. I turn 37 in sept so will hold off till Jan I think if nothing happens. Still holding out hope for this month though.

CD23 is nearly at an end. So far no AF, so we're doing better than last month.

How's everyone doing? It's gone very quiet!

Cd27 here - I'm expecting af imminently as I just feel so crampy. I know I'll be so grumpy, but at least if it's come today my cycle seems to have done better than previous months and is much more in line with what I consider normal. How are you doing Spin?

Anyone else twwing?

Cd 18 here, not convinced for this month, but like you Best,if I have a 28 day cycle this month I will be happy enough.
Does anyone else look at baby names? I constantly adding to my list, but then I think, what a waste, I may never have another DC - I just can't help myself!

CD 25. Still in!

Hi Ladies,

I found your thread today and thought I'd join in if that's okay? It's been a bit quiet recently, so I wonder if you've all had some good news??

I'm close to TTC, getting married on 29th September and stopping taking my pill the day before (Micronor) really hoping for a quick BFP, as got pregnant in January completely by accident (took my pill 2 hours late at exactly the wrong time of the month!), but it was totally the wrong time for us, we just weren't quite there yet so terminated at 5 weeks

My stats are:

Age: 36 (on 30th September)
TTC: #2
DS: 4 years 2 months

This will be the first child for my (will be) husband and I, I had my son in a previous relationship, hence the delay in TTC again, I would have liked them to be closer in age, but hey ho!

So am taking my pre-conception vitamins (Pregnacare) and planning to stop drinking and being really really good as soon as we get back from honeymoon, to give this new little baby the best start possible...so excited, and trying not to obsess about it, but I don't think that's going to be possible!!

Oliver not sure what to say really, I have to be honest on here or what's the point. Obviously do not know the details of why your pregnancy was 'not the right time' but as I already have a DD I could not imagine a termination as (I'm sure you are aware) this thread is for people who are desperate to conceive. I really don't want to judge, i am just puzzled as to why anyone would terminate a pregnancy when they are in a happy relationship. Again, sorry if I am jumping the gun.

RaRa, with respect, no-one should need to justify the decision to terminate a pregnancy to anyone but themselves (and optionally their god!).

I have no doubt that you cannot imagine terminating a pregnancy, but that doesn't mean that we can't be welcoming to another woman who is (as of now, not last year or whenever) in the same boat as the rest of us.

I'm still around, just lurking at the moment as not officially trying this month - giving myself a break. But wishing you all well on the tww's going on.

Sorry forgot to say rara yes i do the name thing, but i've also gone 1 step further, I've come close so many times recently to buying baby clothes in the summer sales?? Officially need help don't I.

Hi to oliversmummy to!

spin I completely get where your coming from, I think what I was trying to say really, if it was me, I wouldn't have written the fact I had a termination in case I upset anyone. I personally am not upset but it may have others that's all.
Oliver I really didn't mean to cause offense as I understand we all have different lives and experiences, it was just my gut reaction when I saw it. It doesn't help that I have spent the morning consoling a friend going through a 3rd time failed IVF which sucks, and to be honest I feel guilty myself for morning about not conceiving when she is going through such hell. I suppose reading your post straight after just made me post without thinking. Anyway welcome and I hope you have lots of luck, during/ after your honeymoon!

Buddah that made me lol! I was day dreaming about buying a new pram i saw the other day... I really need to get a life!

Good to know that I'm not the only person to be thinking baby names. And - yes - I actually went through in my head yesterday whether we would try to mend DS's broken buggy or simply sell it at a lower price. Foolish foolish foolish.
I'm also trying to ignore that I haven't got my period and in no way interpret it in any positive way at all.This is difficult, but I know this is going to make everything worse when AF arrives so I'm trying my best to squash any positive thoughts. Hard when my day is pretty boring and I'm tired so I'm looking for things to distract. Up again at 5am.

Oh and I confess I had a 'what would we do in the house if I had twins' day dream earlier. TWINS!! I can't even get a squinter on a pregnancy test and I'm thinking about twins. Tut tut tut.

Well I'm at the start of the tww according to Ovio but am still gonna do the bd a couple of times as I didn't ovulate until cd23 a couple of cycles ago (currently on cd21). Not had a good day at work and I know that the whole ttcing is affecting me, as I'm feeling quite emotional and stressed which won't help matters! Don't test until 12the so it's going to be a long wait.

When is AF due best? I have a perfectly good buggy in the loft, but you know things have come a long way in the past 3.5 years, that's my excuse!
TWINS! I do the same (my mum is a twin )

Jenny my AF is due in the 12th also. I have no idea when or if I have ovulated- maybe a I should do a couple of extras just to be sure groan!

Oooo rara - you're in with the twinny gene!!! How exciting/terrifying. I remember meeting a mum to 8 week old twins when ds was small (baby cinema) who also had an older child. She said that when she found out she cried for a fortnight because she knew how hard it would be. (Ends well tho - turned out the 2 of them were easier than her first)

No idea when af due. If we go by my uber short cycles then I'm 2 days late. I think I may have ov'd on day 14 (as opposed to day 10) so that might mean I'm looking at anytime from cd27 (now) until cd29. I know what will happen: I will end up winding myself up and testing. AF will come after I test. Or perhaps now - while I'm just even talking about testing- just to piss me off

Well no baby or babies can sleep any less than my DD, she was always good as gold in the day so can't complain.
Fingers crossed for you best the wait is horrible and AF does like to be a bitch!

Yep also had the twin thing in my head, in fact already mentally arranged the spare room to accommodate twin cots and in the future bunk beds... I realise I'm way ahead of myself !

Good luck best, Ive found theres no better way to hurry up AF than to go and buy a pregnancy test, sure enough AF will arrive on the way home from the shop... guaranteed

rara I didn't mean to cause offence to anyone, and I understand that there are people desperate to conceive and my worries now are that having had a termination may mean it takes me longer to conceive when we are ready. There were many reasons that getting pregnant in January wasn't right for us which I won't go into, but suffice it to say, it just wasn't the right time and as difficult as it was to make the decision to terminate it was absolutely the right decision for us. Having said that, I haven't told anyone other than my fiancé and you ladies today that we had a termination, as I was worried of getting exactly the reaction I got today We are both happy with the decision we made, it was only that we caught it so early (around 3 weeks, we had to go back as that was too soon to confirm a pregnancy on ultrasound) that I went through with the termination, had it been much later we would have continued with the pregnancy. I don't expect everyone to agree with what I did, and it was the fear of judgement from others which makes me want to not tell anyone (when we do finally get pregnant I'm already dreading having to tell midwives and doctors for fear of being judged), but it was a decision my OH and I made together and are happy with. I never imagined having a termination either, and until I was in a situation where I didn't want to be pregnant I didn't understand how anyone could be in a position to have a termination. But suffice it to say that it does happen and no one would go through that without having very good reasons for it - trust me.

Sorry, I didn't want to upset anyone and had thought that this board would be good for when we are ready to TTC in a few weeks (as I am over 35 and will be TTCing #2), I thought it best to come clean with all information as this had been bugging me, having not told anyone else about it, but I will leave you all to it here as don't want to cause upset.

Thank you Spindelina for your kind comments.

Buddhabelly I am also desperate to buy baby clothes (and maternity clothes for that matter!) in the summer sale and have a list of baby names on the go at the moment!

Good luck to you all and I hope you all get pregnant speedily!

Ha ha buddah - liking the practical take! And of course you're right - no better way to get AF out of the shadows. No need to buy tests tho - I have a stash. So maybe I'll test to see if I can lure her out.

Hello to everyone! Welcome oliver.

jenny time for some mental time out? I went to see Jason Bourne with a huge cup of cola and popcorn on sat. Did me no end of good. But I love sitting in the dark watching mindless rubbish by myself. Shame it wasn't an avengers film, but still has a good time.

I think that on the fact that I'm craving a champagne cocktail probably means I'm not pregnant, right? I mean surely bodies wouldn't be that cruel.