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Conception

When's the best time to get pregnant? Use our interactive ovulation calculator to work out when you're most fertile and most likely to conceive.

TTC after miscarriage thread #4

989 replies

InsufficientlyCaffeinated · 29/04/2016 14:11

Hello ladies. I noticed the last thread filled up, seemed to happen all of a sudden! Hoping you find your way here (prepares for tumbleweed)

For reference here's thread 3 www.mumsnet.com/Talk/conception/2593041-TTC-after-miscarriage-lucky-thread-number-3

All those we are trying to conceive a child after miscarriage are welcome here, whether it's your first or you already have DC

Good luck ladies. Let's have some BFPs, we've earned it

OP posts:
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24
LuckyinOctober · 18/05/2016 20:00

Clarity your description of what's happened with the positive tests then bleeding sounds like what happened with my second MC. I went to my EPU and found it helpful to talk to them about it rather than my GP, as they're more expert about MC. They gave me a blood test for HCG which confirmed MC, and also advised it would be logged as a second MC so that if I'm unlucky enough to have a third I can be referred on to a recurrent miscarriage consultant, and I will also be offered an early reassurance scan at 8 weeks (if I can carry a pregnancy that long that is). On a practical note, I was told pads were better than tampons for MC bleeding due to infection risk with tampons, but then my bleeding was also too heavy for tampons then. Hugs, I feel for you. Also hugs to you Mrs I know how disappointing AF is. It sounded from your posts like your body has settled more this cycle with the clomid so hope next cycle will be the one for you.

Brenna24 · 18/05/2016 20:29

Hugs to you Mrs. I am tryingt o get my life back to 'normal' for before we started to conceive. Having my hobbies to look forward to helps with the positivity. I am climbing on a tuesday night and I have promised myself that I will start riding again soon. I haven't done that since my last horse died about 5 years ago.

jodiebee664 · 18/05/2016 20:46

so sorry clarity sending positive thoughts and hoping it doesn't turn out to be mc. can totally understand how you're feeling....just so tough not knowing if and when and the constant waiting. Flowers

AmyB1986 · 18/05/2016 21:28

So sorry you're going through this clarity. I had a lot of bleeding with dd1 at the begging of my pregnancy. I had one bleed at 4 weeks which was like a light period, I then went in to have another bleed at 7-8 weeks and I had a scan at 9 weeks which confirmed that dd's twin was disappearing hence all the bleeds. DD is a grumpy 8 going on 18 year old now. I'm keeping my fingers crossed for a positive outcome for you too.

Whatsername17 · 19/05/2016 05:49

In shock!

TTC after miscarriage thread #4
jpeg28 · 19/05/2016 06:22

Wow!!!!! Congratulations whatshername that's so amazing! You deserve it! Wishing you a happy 9 months! Xx

Whatsername17 · 19/05/2016 06:29

Thank you. After a miscarriage at 13 weeks and a chemical I am so terrified. I took the test to stop the crazy 'am I/aren't I' thoughts. I've had practically no symptoms at all. This was the month I decided to stop putting my life on hold. I went out last Friday and drank, I haven't taken my pre-conception vitamins because I was fed up of them making me feel a bit nauseous. I bought sushi for my lunch today (which I obviously won't eat now). I can't believe it has happened and I'm just hoping that I might be able to be hopeful soon. Ahhh I'm a mess!

Clarity77 · 19/05/2016 07:01

Congratulations- whatshername, don't worry about all those things, what will be, will be. We do need to live our lives too particularly before we know.
Thanks for the advice ladies, trying to be more positive today. I know these things have happened to many of us and we have all got through it.
You are right about hobbies Brenna im trying to get back into running regularly but have found that I have been stress eating a lot since my first miscarriage which actually makes me more feel down and frumpy.
I do want to keep trying- can't give up now but I think i need to keep things in perspective and stop planning my life around 'if I'm pregnant' or ' if we have a child'.
From now on, no temps, no OPKs, just regular sex around the right time and fingers crossed. I have probably learnt a lesson about early testing at 12dpo but that said I still would have tested the morning AF was due and got a positive.
Onwards and upwards. Good luck to all.

InsufficientlyCaffeinated · 19/05/2016 07:08

Congratulations Whatsername that's great news! Good luck, I hope you have a happy 9 months Smile

OP posts:
Brenna24 · 19/05/2016 08:30

Congratulations What. So excited for you. I hope this is the one. You really do deserve this.

I have my running kit at work Clarity just in case I get the urge to start that again. Like you i have done a l ot of eating since my first miscarriage and I am heavier than I have ever been and quite ashamed of myself. I'll run if you do Wink

AmyB1986 · 19/05/2016 11:47

Congrats whatshername wishing you a happy 9 months.

Brenna & clarity I cannot run to save my life! My ankle gives way literally within feet of my house and then I can't walk properly, I really admire people who can run.

The skin breakout if at its peak I think, I resorted to buying freederm spot stuff from asda last night after work. I look like I've had no sleep for a months, my face is like a teenagers and my hair is lank and full of grease despite washing it yesterday. This is the worst lp I've ever had! I'm allergic to my own hormones I think.

Clarity77 · 19/05/2016 11:54

Brenna - I will make myself get up and do park run this Saturday for sure. Feeling fat doesn't help me feel any better and definitely does not help make me feel sexy in the bedroom.

Been to the GP, he told me what I already knew and said that I can have a referral if it happens again. But then said he thought it was pointless to refer me as I am getting pregnant so there are no obvious problems. Seems a bit contradictory to me as presumably that's the point of a recurrent miscarriage referral. I think he was less convinced because I have a 12 year old. He also said there can not be any problems with my partner if I am getting pregnant, is that even true? Is it always a fault with the woman if you can get pregnant? Surely they test men for a reason too.
I think this is why you need expert help as GPs only have a broad knowledge unfortunately you can not self refer to the EPU in my area.

Miami81 · 19/05/2016 12:08

Congratulations whatsername. What fabby news.

Clarity - my boss and his wife had six miscarriages and they were both checked over. Don't think it is just the woman just because you can get pregnant. There can still be chromosonal stuff from the swimmers as far as I know, also 12 yrs is a long time, very shortsighted or Gp to say things like that.
Can you see another GP and specifically state that it is to talk about fertility stuff? At mine there is a guy who did a two year stint at the gynae ward of the hospital, he is very good and as you say a bit more specialised in this area.
I would try and ring the EPU anyway just to talk to someone.
All the best.

Pineapple80 · 19/05/2016 12:25

Congrats whatshername! Wishing you wel Smile

Have not logged in all week due to busy week of work but hope everyone is doing well. Will take some time to catch up on posts...

Got my period yesterday after an anxious 2ww. This is my third cycle since my mmc in Feb. We only started trying again last cycle so trying my best not to be too disappointed. Obviously I am disappointed but guess it wasn't our month.

Does anyone find it a bit harder to talk to other women who haven't experienced miscarriage, about your mc experiences? There's been many a time in conversation that I've felt like only those who have been through it can truly understand. Maybe I'm just feeling sensitive about it? I feel like I'll never be that blasé or unaware of what could go wrong again. Sorry if I'm not making sense but it really changes pregnancy for you doesn't it.

Anyway must soldier on. I really could do with some chocolate and wine with this period pain I have right now!

Nitnat10 · 19/05/2016 12:45

Congrats whatsername, always nice to see some good news on here, wishing you well. Clarity, your story resonates, I went to the GP this morning to voice my concerns about my short lp and long cycles and she was very dismissive of temping or any conclusions I had drawn from it, said a 7 day LP was the norm (ok, never mind that all other sources of information suggest 10-14 days is the norm), and like they told you Clarity, should take heart from previously having conceived (in the same breath as 'you probably didn't ovulate at all in those really long cycles, despite what your temps say'). Anyway, now I get to wait till my next period (whenever the heck that may be) and then come and give bloods every other day from about CD20 till I get my period after that (that could be like three to four weeks of bloods every other day!) as my cycle is so unpredictable. Just fab, work is going to be very pleased with that. I thought going to the GP and trying to figure things out would make me feel better but it's actually had the opposite effect. Contemplating going private as the GP said she wouldn't refer me to anyone more specialized till we've looked at the bloods, which could literally be another two months from now. Sad

Whatsername17 · 19/05/2016 13:06

Do you think I should be worried about the fact that I got 2-3 on the weeks indicator when my last AF was 3 weeks 5 days ago? I know I ovulated two weeks ago today but with my other pregnancies I only ever got 1-2 at 14 dpo. Im so scared I just do not know what to do with myself.

Brenna24 · 19/05/2016 13:14

Laughting Amy. I don't have any weak ankles as an excuse, I am just not athletic at all. I go running, I can eventually even get up to 1 step up from a snails pace but I always look like I am on the brink of death. Tomato face, gasping for breath, hair stood on end etc. No matter how fit I am. It is just something I am not designed to do. Sadly it is a quick and cheap way ofr keeping fit and I can fit it in a lunchtime at work, so I persevere.

Clarity I went out this lunchtime, inspired by you. It took me 39 minutes to do a run I used to do in 28, but I did it. I'd forgotten about parkrun, maybe I should do that saturday morning too. Your Dr is wrong. There are a multitude of things they can test for. Many people still end up 'unexplained' but many other people get a diagnosis and some treatment. If your partner is producing sperm with reasonable motility but bad morphology or choromosomal abnormalities like a balanced translocation then it can totally be to do with him too. Have you had 2 or 3 miscarriages so far and what age are you?

So sorry Pineapple. I hope this month is your month. I am not finding it a problem to talk to anyone about it. My friends who haven't been pregnant or had one have had a lot more questions, but I made it clear once I was over the initial shock that I was happy to answer questions and not much was too sensitive to ask. So now they have a fairly good idea what we have been through and the ice is well broken.

I am sorry she was so dismissive nitnat. I am glad she is willing to do bloods though, even if they are inconvenient. Hopefully they will prove your point for you.

I am eating a very healthy chicken salad for lunch, cycled to work and have been for a run. I am smug now.

Pineapple80 · 19/05/2016 14:01

Brenna - wow look at you go! You've inspired me to get back into exercise. I've only managed walking lately. Want to get back into some group classes soon. No excuses really!

Thanks I think I am just a bit over sensitive about things this week... wanting to be pg now etc.

Pineapple80 · 19/05/2016 14:05

Whatshername - I have read that the weeks indicator is not always super accurate. Thinking of you and hope time goes by quickly so the stress doesn't get to you too much.

Are you going to opt for getting blood work done for HCG and track it this time around? If and when I get my next bfp I am thinking about not having it done as when I had my mmc earlier this year I had my bloods done every week as I was spotting and it stressed me out too much.

BertieBotts · 19/05/2016 14:14

Well my period is really here and it's kicking my arse today. Headaches, nausea, cramps and DS is on school holiday and driving me mad!

Clarity your GP is wrong. It could be a multitude of things.

Brenna24 · 19/05/2016 15:00

So sorry Bertie. I hope the symptoms stop soon.

Go for it Pineapple. I am sick of being all woe is me and am determined to do something about it. It is bound to help woth physically and mentally.

Brenna24 · 19/05/2016 16:20

Balance has been restored to the universe. We had birthday cakes for someone at work this afternoon. However we didn't communicate well and ended up with a rather large amount. I have eaten my body weight in cakes and crisps.

Brenna24 · 19/05/2016 16:22

My boobs are throbbing and I have tiny cramps in my uterus and I had bit of bloody mucous when I wiped last night. Currently 7dpo.

BertieBotts · 19/05/2016 16:28

Well DH had a rubbish day at work so we have ordered takeaway, hurrah! :)

Miami81 · 19/05/2016 16:32

I think I have ovulation pains in my right side at the moment. Weird I have only ever felt them in left before now. We dtd last night so might tackle DH when I get home again.
I know this is tmi but has anyone experienced their cm being a bit pink after the miscarriage?
So basically it is either ov or AF!!
7dpo Brenna could be implantation?