Just about to start IVF - excited,scared,emotional ..........

[Nelli30]

Hi there everyone. I haven't posted on here for a long time, but I was am finding myself in need of support from people who understand what it like and my experiences from this site in the past have been so helpful I thought I'd ask for your help once again.

Brief Summary: I've been married for 2 1/2 years, I have one stepdaughter who is 8yr, an ex wife to contend with who is bonkers. we've been ttc for 3 yrs, I've had all the tests including laparoscopy and our diagnosis is 'unexplained infertility' I've tried hypnotherapy, reflexology, acupuncture, herbal remedies but all to no avail. I fell pregnant once , a year ago next week actually, but lost the baby after 5 weeks.
Without boring you all ... I have found the whole experience so very stressful and emotional, I'm feel so angry all the time, with loads of questions and thought running round in my head. Above all why us?! I'm finding the whole thing quite hard to cope with. We have our first appt at the clinic on the 19th Jan which I am excited, aprehensive, about, we are having to pay for it because I am only 31 and in our area the women has to be 35 to get it on the NHS, so this is also an added pressure and its costing £4000. We can only afford one shot and I am terrified incase it doesn't work although I am very positive about the outcome you have to be realistic. I'm scared how I would cope if it didn't work, I'm scared that my husband and I are not strong enough to cope with it if it does not work. But on the other hand I'm excited and feel overwhlemed at the thought that it might just work and we could be starting our own little family. How lovely it would be for all of us including my stepdaughter as I could then feel at last part of a normal family and feel sucessful instead of a failure at something so natural.

Basically... if anyone is still awake after reading all that, I'm just hoping that someone out there has been through this and can tell me that my fears and hopes are normal cause I am really struggling with it all.

Thanks very much for being there

xxx

Hi there,

in brief, we went for IVF, were succesfull with the first go and our little boy is now almost 9 mnths.

The only advice I can give you is to stop reading up on IVF whilst you are busy with treatment - there is such a thing as too much information!

It took me 3 yrs to get my head around it, but I was in the right "space" when we went. A lot of it has to do with your approach to the process, so take it 1 day at a time and just deal with what happens on that given day.

You are most welcome to contact me and ALL the best to you!

Regards,
Tania

Hi there - just thought I'd update you on our first clinic visit. It was all very positive and the consultant kept stressing to me about how young I was.DH came away feeling really positive and excited about the next few months and to a degree so did I but we came away once again to wait for a letter from the clinic with our next 'planning appointment' which could be anytime from 1 month to 2 months away and I just felt disappointed as it means yet another wait. I know it doesn't sound very long but it feels like a lifetime at the moment, I've had to accept the fact it not going to happen naturally and now I just want to get on with it! and then of course what if it doesn't work?! I shudder to think - not ready to face that yet and hopefully we won't have to. They explained the treatment to us on Friday , and it doesn't sound great but it will be worth it in the end I'm sure. So basically we are now waiting for the clinic to send us our next appt and then we will be staring all being well! I feel quite relieved that we are now getting somewhere and feel positive about the treatment, so fingers crossed they get a move on with the appt letter!!

How's everyone else doing? Latenight - How are you?

Tania - thanks for your imput, its great to hear success stories like yours - so many people say to 'keep things realistic' and 'remember it might not work'etc that it great to have a bit of happiness to focus on

ARTOO - How its going with you? Where abouts are you in your cycle of treatment now?!

Hi Nelli, this all sounds very positive and 2 months may sound alot but infact its only 8 weeks away...
We were going to go for our first try in Feb but DH has fallen ill and is on antibiotics and doesnt feel that he can perform at all ...so we are now planning on March and just arranging with the clinic to sign the mirade of consent forms etc. Lets drop a thread at the beginning of March to see how you get on with your clinic appointment and how I am proceeding too??? Im looking at it that the 8 weeks will give me time to eat properly go to the gym and maybe lose a few pounds to give it the best possible shot - so no doubt the time will go quickly..

Just wanted to wish you all well. I agree with your comments TaniaR, now have dd aged 8 months after 5 attempts of IVF.

I can remember its must easier said than done.

Oh, LateNightOwl, it's all starting to move. Sorry to hear about DH being ill, but as you say it gives you a little bit of time to prepare yourself.

Nelli - sounds like your consultation went well, but how frustrating to have to wait for the next appointment. I hope it comes through soon.

As for me, well I'm now in the 2ww, having had egg collection and embryo transfer last week. Test date is next Thursday. I'm concentrating on keeping relaxed, and trying not to think about it! It all went fine, we did really well at each step of the way, and as well as the two embies hopefully settling in inside me we have another 6 in the freezer, which I think takes the pressure off this cycle a bit

Hugs,
Artoo.

Thats great Artoo - I will be thinking about you and keeping everything crossed for you. Sometimes I get overwhelmed with the whole thing!

Latenight - So sorry to hear that your DH is unwell. You must feel disappointed but as you have said the positive is that you have a few more weeks to prepare your body! I think it would be a great idea to start a new thread at the begining of March. Fingers tightly crossed for both of us.

My DH and I feel so ready for this now! Bring it on I say!!!

hugs to you all xxxxxx

fingers crossed Arto - wishing you all the best - do let us know how you get on.

Nelli - will catch up with you in March -

I'm thrilled - it's a BFP

It's all a bit odd, as I don't feel any different at all, and I'm not getting any pregnancy symptoms whatsoever, but the lines came up really fast on the pg test! I get an early scan to check everything's OK, which will take place in three weeks time.

Wow

Hugs,
Artoo.

Thats brilliant ! congratulations, you must be so excited !

We had our first appointment yesterday and start treatment on 11th Feb so fingers crossed I will be joining you soon!

Is the 2 wk wait until the test as bad as I am expecting?! It must feel like its going to last forever!!

Congratulations again!

Love
Nelli xxx

Fantastic news Artoo - Im absolutely delighted for you - well done

All the best Nelli for Feb 11th do let me know how it goes - we have our appointment on 6th and looks like we start our treatment on 27th Feb but will let you know nearer the date.

Thanks latenight - you too. Feb 6th is my birthday so it must be a good omen! Let me know how it goes.

XXXXX

Hi Nelli - hope you had a great Birthday?
appointment went well today and we kick off (fingers crossed) with our treatment on 28th Feb....all the best with yours and let me know how you get on. Are you on the long or short protocol? They are putting me on the Short P...mainly due to age ...

Hi LatenightOwl - have not seen you for ages and just wanted to wish you well..Hope all goes well for your treatment.. Best of luck XX

It wasn't explained to me that there was a choice, I guess maybe thats to do with age as well - not sure. Our treatment cycle is 6 weeks in total. Drugs are being delivered today. First tablets to be taken on sunday.

My mum gave me a great book on IVF , written by a women who has been through the process. Can't remember the title at the moment as I am at work , but if you're interested can let you know later!

I know you have to be realistic but I am very excited !!!

Thanks Nelli, if you do get the book name do let me know!

Thanks Rahrah for your note - haven't been in the hut of doom for a short while cos I too am getting excited over the treatment..but have had ear to the door and really cheered me up to hear all your tales - Fab thread!

No doubt I will sneak in at the end of month if my FSH levels are high.

Nelli your treatment sounds like the long protocol - I think they start you at day 21 of one cycle and then take you through the next whereas with mine they start at day 1 and work with one cycle. Apparently something to do with the suppressent (spelling) drug - they dont want to give it too long to older women in case it stops everything ...

Will look forward to hearing how your treatment progresses...

Nelli, you start soon! Good luck to you, please keep us posted

Hugs,
Artoo.

Just read this thread. Congratulations Artoo!

I have one DS aged 5 who was an ICSI baby. I tried another cycle last Sept but only got one follicle so abandoned that attempt. Tried again in Oct - again only one follicle but went ahead - all seemed to be OK but unfortunately no BFP. I am in Budapest and there is no 2 week wait here - it's 3! Was very optimistic as AF was 5 days late but then started bleeding and test was negative.

Was advised to lose weight which I haven't managed. But am going to try again this month - period due around 24th Feb and will be on short protocol.

Am aged 42 so age is an issue and a worry. I know I may have to think about donor eggs - not sure how I feel about it TBH.

Hope all goes well for you Nelli - I felt fine while "on the drugs" (!).

Hi there, Just thought I would update you. Started on the tablets and nasal spray now. All going well. Feel fine , the odd twinge in my stomach and really really sore boobs but thats all.

Latenight - hope you are ok, 23rd is drawing nearer!! Best of luck. The name of the books
are:

1. The couples guide to In Vitro Fertilization by Liza Charlesworth (this one is written by a women who has been through the process and is a great book as you can relate to everything she says(although she is in america and the process is slightly different there) Retails at 10:00

2. In Vitro Fertilization - Third Edition by Sher/Davis and Stoess. I am just about to start this one. Its a UK book and is more medical.

3)Baby Steps - A blokes-eye view of IVF by Jason Davis. Available at waterstones, £6.49
I've just ordered this one for my husband! Its supposed to be a lighthearted view of the process to help men understand what us women are going through.

Hope all is well
Nelli

Sorry its taken me so long to reply , we been having a few probs with the ex wife and stepdaughter!

Hi, I hope you don't mind me dropping in on this thread. I'm in the middle of IVF 7, having 6 failed previous attempts and a DD adopted recently.

We took a break from IVF for the adoption so now I feel more positive than I did before DD arrived.

However, I feel like I am slipping back into the old scared mindset and am desperately trying to be realistic and hopeful at the same time. Ugh.

I have a couple of questions, maybe someone can help?

Is it true that you can't pick up heavy weights (ie, DD!) for a few weeks?

Are there any activities that you should avoid once the embryo has been transferred into the uterus? I heard baths, which is fine with me as I don't tend to take them very often, prefering showers.

I would appreciate your help!

Hey Faraway! The advice I was given after the embryos were transferred was to basically behave as if pregnant, that was no strenuous lifting, avoid blue and soft cheese, and raw/not fully cooked meats. I didn't get any advice aout baths, and in fact took a bath regularly during the 2ww. Hot tubs I believe are to be avoided though.

Nelli - is the 23rd your collection day? Of is it when you start your injections? It will be a good day for you, as the 23rd is also the day of my first scan - I will be seeing heartbeat(s) for the first time! Good luck!

Hugs,
Artoo.

Thanks, Artoo. Transfer is in a couple of hours. I'm really bummed because I have a cold and every now and then I break out in coughing fits. I wonder if cough suppresants work?

Anyone ever used them? Does it say "don't take if pregant" on the box?!

Sigh. Why is it never easy?

Keeping fingers crossed for you Artoo for 23rd hope all is well - do let us know.

Nelli - how are the stims going??? what date is the egg collection? Thanks for the book titles - I will seek them out this week.

I start the stims on 28th Feb (if FSH levels are okay) with a proposed collection date of 12th March... just keeping fingers crossed that FSH levels are below 10

Hi latenight.

Everything fine , have finished norethisterone tabs , still sniffing away, start injections on 4th March, long cycle as we opted to start straight away this cycle which meant an extra week or we would have had to wait until next cycle. We have a scan booked for 14th March to check how my follicles are developing, so egg collection will depend on that.

Waiting for af to arrive at the moment - can't help thinking how great it would be if I was pg now! What a fairytale! Realistically though , if it hasn't happened in the last 3 yrs its not going to now is it! Still no harm in dreaming!!

Good luck to everyone and keep us informed

Hi Folks
firstly Artoo all the best for 23rd - thinking of you and let us know how you get on! (dont think I will get a chance to get on here again til Sat).

Nelli - hope the drugs are doing their stuff! Interestingly, if all goes well with me then egg collection is around 14th March too...spooky or what! But mustnt get ahead of myself and am getting more tense..I feel.. as we get nearer to 28th Feb - blood test day. We also have an added complication..my DP has a sore bollock! been like this since January. Been to the docs so many times (I even sat in one session) and finally he has a scan tomorrow. He is so scared and I must admit that I am too that the dreaded C word will be mentioned. We know it is not an infection cos he's had loads of antibiotics. We checked with the clinic and they thought that if anything the tabs would make his Sperm stronger (strange) but he is more worried that he wont be able to perform at all. How cruel would that be?? So keeping fingers crossed and just hoping at the moment that a quick cure will be on the cards - we reckon we have about 21/2 weeks to sort it out - pressure or what!

Anyway enough of me and DP - hope you are not climbing up the wall with drug enhanced hormones (are you on the injections yet?)

Scan went well - we have a single healthy heartbeat, and a couple of pictures of a small blob

It felt a bit strange - first of all I was looking around to see if it was going to be twins, and then there was relief that it was only one, coupled with a bit of sadness that only one made it.

But one is great, perfect

Hugs,
Artoo.