TTC through Donor IUI or Donor IVF or just undecided - all welcome!

[Kwick709]

This thread is for anyone trying to conceive... or thinking about doing so through donor IUI or donor IVF. Nothing TMI - feel free to join, we are a lovely group here to support and help keep the cray-cray away!

Taydex my lovely grandfather always said he preferred funerals to weddings. A chance to catch up with old friends often when many months or years have passed since everyone was last all together can be quite a nice event! I thought at my grandmother's funeral how sad it was in a way that the whole family were together and my grandmother, who would have appreciated that more than anyone, wasn't there to see it!

I think the bath thing is as much about temperature as infection too. I wouldn't be worried about infection from swimming - the chlorine should take care of that!

Gosh, your scan is tomorrow. Sending positive thoughts your way :)

Sorry to hear about your aunt taydex, I agree with shoes granddad....my nannas funeral was one of the hardest days in my life but also one of the loveliest to meet some family that I never even knew about let alone met before
Best of luck with your scan tomorrow,so excited for you!!!

kwick agrees ring your clinic in the morning,hopefully won't make too much difference.hope the symptoms are for the right reason this time!!! Hope you have a good sleep.

Hope everyone else is ok :) I have 6days off work now.....wahooooo! Hair needs to be dyed,eyebrows sorted! Ready to learn to be a happy human again!!

Love to all x

Hey Kwik,

Don't panic. I am sure it will be fine. What's done is done now. I don't think 24 hours will make a massive difference (but then I have no medical qualifications so maybe don't trust me too much!). Give the clinic a call when you can and see what thy say. They will be able to put your mind at ease and let you know when to do the other one. Until you get the chance to do that please try not to worry. Actually, don't worry after that, but you know what I mean.

Take care please.

Me x

Thanks Shoes and Pickle.

Home now. Didn't get back till 9 so just shovelled some mostly friendly food down me and feel the need to sleep. So tired. But I need to do Crimone which I'm supposed to walk for 15 mind after. Would it be really bad of me to just walk round the house a bit? It's so cold out there and I just want to sleep...

Will update you all on the scan tomorrow. I am crap at interpreting these things. Hopefully bean will be in the right place and they can detect a heartbeat then I can relax a bit (and get excited).

x

I also don't think I've drunk enough today so now just downed a pint and a half of squash. Sure I'll regret that in the middle of the night but it's probably the right thing to do...

I did think that taydex. Maybe if I actually do have fertility issues, I.E not ovulating, I may get some NHS funding. Although, I think, I'd rather be ovulating normally and have no issues, and have to pay full whack.

Kwick - I don't think I was dehydrated because I had to have a full bladder for the scan so was drinking all morning just weird how my ovaries could 'shrink' in comparison so my scan this time last year! Yeah definitely, at least I can get the cyst sorted now. I don't think they'll do anything, but I may be referred to gynaecology. I'll go doctors Monday once I know the ultrasound results are definitely through and go from there.
Haha - no definitely godmother - my grandmother is 63 this year, and would be very difficult considering she went through the menopause at 32!!! .
Don't worry too much about the injection being administered 24 hours earlier - but then again, I have no idea what I'm talking about! Can you ring your clinic tomorrow & see what they say?? Let us know.

Taydex - good luck for your scan tomorrow. I'm sure everything is fine and dandy - I'm excited for you!! Let us know how you get on. :) xx

Taydex, I hope you're alright after your aunts funeral

So it's the day of the early scan today and my wife and her sister (who is visiting at the moment) are just stressing me out. Getting a bit stressed and emotional about the scan anyway and they're not helping. Anyone got any suggestions on how to help people understand what we're going through and how stressful/emotional it is for us so that they can support us better? x

What times your scan Hun?
Maybe just sit them down over cake (cakes always good) and try and explain how you are feeling. I can only imagine how you are feeling/stressing out.i know it's different but I have my appointment for my leg on Monday and my friend said she'd come (&now surprise surprise she can't as hasn't organised who is going to pick her kids up which she said she would!!!!) anywho...I'm actually pleased she isn't coming as I want to be there early so can find it and not worry about being late,it's uber stressing me out anyway so fussing or saying the wrong thing will just piss me off so fine going solo.
It's a really stressful time sweetie and soooooo many emotions (and hormones) going around so be kind to yourself and if that means saying you just need some time out from being around people for a few moments then do it.
Good luck today,can't wait to hear how it went x

Taydex

What time is your scan at?

I know I would need good calm support in this situation.

Please just be straightforward. Say, 'Look I need you to help me stay calm. Perhaps we can talk about something else? I need distraction!' or something to that effect.

It's a beautiful day. I know that if it were me I'd head out for a walk. It's the best way to relax and try to focus on the signs of Spring that are starting to appear. You need to think about something that's not the scan, even if it remains at the back of your mind.

I hope that doesn't sound as though I'm minimalising things. I just know that for me, rather than all the focus being on the scan, I'd be better off with other things to think about.

Ah Taydex I'm sorry you're feeling so emotional

Maybe just be straightforward with them, as Shoes suggested? No better way to be heard than to just say it straight. Maybe say about how emotional you're feeling - they may not even realise that they're stressing you out... I know I'm being pretty useless because you're likely to of had your scan by now, but if you haven't, take an hour out to be on your own. Clear your head like :)

Hope everything goes/went ok today! Have been thinking of you. Let us know xx

Oh taydex I am so sorry that you are feeling it - hopefully the scan was fine and you got the support needed. You have to prioritise yourself, even if that means you step on the toes of others.

Dont underestimate what a toll all this can place on you - a funeral, long travel, hormones, life in general, rain and so on

I took the ostrich approach... I did not call the clinic... I completely forgot again this morning as I had a couple of fires to put out at work and now it is too late to call.... A great mum I am going to make!
My womble is still feeling jippy and my boobs are very sore.

I always apply the crinone in bed.... So either just before I sleep or in the early hours before I get out of bed in the morning.... Why do you have to walk? Is that to avoid clumping?

caution hope you get further investigation soon

pickle real sorry your friend let you down. Please try and not stress too much another do as I say not as I do

On way back to Blighty!!!

Hi ladies,

Thank you so much for your support. I knew you guys would calm me down a bit. Thank you for all your help and advice. I think I was just stressing and getting emotional about the scan and I think anyone would have annoyed me. Went for pub lunch with the mrs and her sister on the way to the scan (almost as good as cake, Pickle!) and calmed down a bit. Told my wife I was feeling stressed and emotional and she was really good about it. Feeling much better now.

So, we had the scan and it's sooooo cool! Got to see the little bean and saw it's heart beat. I almost cried. Actually, we both almost cried. Such a relief to see all is going well in there as it's so hard to tell when you don't feel much different to normal. We got some piccies too which I will upload to here from my phone as I am paranoid about sending them to my (work) laptop LOL. I am terrible at seeing what's what on these scans but the nurse was very good at pointing stuff out. I read in one of my books that if you get to 8 weeks and they find a heartbeat the chance of miscarriage falls to 2-3%.

TD x

Pickle - I know exactly what you mean. At one point this morning I was tempted to just say "I'm going on my own, I can't deal with this stress" and get in my car. But I knew I wanted my wife there really. Good luck with your leg appointment on Monday if I don't remember to say. I have to keep reminding myself that it's the hormones and the situation causing the stress and emotion.

Shoes - Scan was at 2. I got your messages before we went in, just didn't have chance to reply. I got the distraction I needed. We went to a nice pub for lunch and talked about food and lots of other things (including Jamie Oliver as it's his parents pub). And I love food so I was happy (and there were things on the menu (and booze-free beer) I could eat which helped). We had a lovely walk with the dogs round the grounds of a country house on our way home (part of the stress - why did we have to take my sister in law and the dogs with us?!). Still, it was a lovely walk and lovely weather. And there were cute little lambs (yeah, sure I read in a book to stay away from farm animals... oops. Meh, made me happy so who cares?!).

Caution - Yeah, I had to have a word. Seems to have done the trick. I don't think they realised they were causing me stress. Still, all sorted now.

Kwik - Yes, the scan was fine, thanks. You're right re the pressure. There's been a lot going on recently. Should calm down a bit now. I must learn to prioritise myself right now. Soon enough I'm going to have to prioritise someone else! . Ha ha, don't worry about being a bad mum. I've done plenty of not ideal things since starting all this process, and can't say I regret any. Weird how we are given different instructions from our clinics for the Crinone. I might check the Crinone website/leaflet to see what it recommends! Safe journey home.

Right, off to find you that photo.

TD x

So here's a piccy. Little bean is the bit with the dotty line across it (measures 10.7mm). The bit above that looks like a swan's neck is the yolk sac that feeds it till the placenta's in place. Nurse is pleased with progress (measures at 7weeks +2days even though IUI was 7weeks ago today) and location. Heartbeat also fine and only 1 bean (phew!).

TD x

Kwick thank you. I hope so too! Keep us updated on your womble area & boobage, lol. Could be a good sign!

Taydex that scan is beautiful! Looks like a little bean at the moment but soon enough it'll grow into a beautiful baba. Funny how they measured you at 7wks 2 days, even though you know it's not! Does that mean that baby is measuring a tiny bit bigger than 'normal' (I use normal for lack of a better word - sorry!)?
Glad things went okay and you're not as stressed out anymore. I bet having the scan done was a huge weight off your mind. When do you have your 12wk one? Have you booked it yet? Xx

taydex I am soooooooooooo pleased! Very pleased everything went well and look at you with your little bean :)
May I ask was the scan abdominal?
I am cery impressed Jamie Oliver's parents pub has non-alcoholic beer!!! So few places stock it I am thinking of starting a petition. In Spain everywhere has it!

caution womble and boobage has felt this way 5 times before - hope just crinone side effect...

I am back home now and going to watch a bit of TV and then schleep

Dammit, just wrote an essay and lost it!

Now, where was I?

Caution - Thank you. Yeah, the timing's a bit weird but I think that's probably mostly because it's hard to measure something so small where the edges aren't clear. I think I'll stick to my timing's. It's only 2 days different and seeing as we know exactly when IUI was... I guess I'll probably get re dated at the 12 week scan.

Yes, huge weight off my mind. Feels so good to have had it done at last. All done with the clinic now. They don't need to see me again and I'm over to he normal NHS system now. GP appointment next week when hopefully should get date for 12 week scan.

Kwik - Thank you. No, scan was the vibratory type one (trans vaginal?), just like the ones you have to check follicle size. She had a good old root around in there to check everywhere and check there's no others. Felt pretty thorough.

I know what you mean re fake beer. Annoys me that a lot of places don't do. And if they do it's normally Becks Blue which isn't as nice as others. Today's was San Miguel 0 %. Not bad as fake beer goes.

Right, bedtime here. Night lovely ladies xx

Oh yay Taydex I'm so pleased to hear (and see!) that! I was getting worried that I hadn't heard anything, but had to hit the refresh button twice and there it was! Yay! Lovely happy thoughts to be going off to sleep too. :)

taydex you definitely should go with your timing! As you say, you know when the magic happened. Just to say I am soooooooo so so so pleased for you...I had kind of dismissed IUI as just a way for clinics to make money what with my 5 failed attempts and my cousin's failed attempts too but you are proof it can work - I go back to recommending as first port of call as it is MUCH less intense and invasive than IVF.

Awe look at little bean so cute. I love scan pics I find them so magical
My bestie had her 12week scan yesterday only to be told she was 10weeks (it was Gp who said she was 12 even tho she thought she was around 10!!) so she gets to go back soon, I have named her little one pea for now. So I have bean and pea to keep getting updates for :)
kwick/shoes I've lost track till you can test, boo is if nearly your time?
I'm on a mission to try and build the energy to clean my car today-determined to not waste money on car washes when can do myself and put that money towards baby making :)

pickle I love cleaning cars! I have only ever had one car though - Humphrey- and that was when I lived in Spain. Unfortunately I never lived in a place where I could bathe him, I always had to take him to the jet spray place. But I lovingly did that ever week, it was a great way to destress - jetspraying off the dirt and dust of the week.

My test date is 22nd March. shoes do you have the same date? Lord knows how I will last... Good news is I am away most of next week (Brussels this time) so will have a big distraction!

Taydex I am so so happy for you. I was thinking about you yesterday and hoping you would have good news at the scan. I can only imagine the relief you must have felt to see that heartbeat!

Kwick my OTD is the 22nd as well, which is odd really as we know your sperm/egg should be a couple of days ahead of mine.

I'm planning to start testing next weekend. Even if I have another chemical pregnancy I want to know about it. I'm not a 'blissful ignorance' sort of person - more 'knowledge is power' rightly or wrongly!